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Thanks! My insanity seems to have passed. I know deep down that IE is the way to go but somedays I just want to lose this weight now. I really need to focus on how I feel when I eat intuitivey and don't stuff myself and stop focusing on the weight. Thanks again! livingrainbowcolor wrote: > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been struggling this week with IE Hi ,Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual hand. :) How about if you try something radically different? Think about the good experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down, congratulate yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you bought. You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic principles of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize. What will your life be like when you have really established IE skills? What will be different? Best wishes,lrchttp://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/ Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

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Thanks! My insanity seems to have passed. I know deep down that IE is the way to go but somedays I just want to lose this weight now. I really need to focus on how I feel when I eat intuitivey and don't stuff myself and stop focusing on the weight. Thanks again! livingrainbowcolor wrote: > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been struggling this week with IE Hi ,Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual hand. :) How about if you try something radically different? Think about the good experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down, congratulate yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you bought. You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic principles of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize. What will your life be like when you have really established IE skills? What will be different? Best wishes,lrchttp://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/ Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to Yahoo! Answers.

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Thanks! My insanity seems to have passed. I know deep down that IE is the way to go but somedays I just want to lose this weight now. I really need to focus on how I feel when I eat intuitivey and don't stuff myself and stop focusing on the weight. Thanks again! livingrainbowcolor wrote: > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been struggling this week with IE Hi ,Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual hand. :) How about if you try something radically different? Think about the good experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down, congratulate yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you bought. You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic principles of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize. What will your life be like when you have really established IE skills? What will be different? Best wishes,lrchttp://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/ Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to Yahoo! Answers.

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Thanks Jess! Yesterday I was actually considering doing the WW core plan and IE together! That's what a crazy mood I was in. I feel a lot better today and I'm going to start reading the IE book again. And like you said I think I need a refresher in "reject the diet mentality" and the effects of dieting on the body. And yes I was foolish! Thanks for your advice! butterflyjess07 wrote: It doesn't

work! And even if it does, you'll be unhappy while you're doing it and gain it all back when you're finished! You might find it helpful to reread the chapter in the IE book about the physiological effects of dieting too. Before I started following IE, I decided I was going to try one last diet while I read the book. When I got to that chapter, I gave up the foolish idea! (Not that YOU are foolish, but sometimes our culturally induced desperation to lose the weight NOW makes us ACT foolishly even though we are intelligent and reasonable). Hope that helps :) Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

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Thanks Jess! Yesterday I was actually considering doing the WW core plan and IE together! That's what a crazy mood I was in. I feel a lot better today and I'm going to start reading the IE book again. And like you said I think I need a refresher in "reject the diet mentality" and the effects of dieting on the body. And yes I was foolish! Thanks for your advice! butterflyjess07 wrote: It doesn't

work! And even if it does, you'll be unhappy while you're doing it and gain it all back when you're finished! You might find it helpful to reread the chapter in the IE book about the physiological effects of dieting too. Before I started following IE, I decided I was going to try one last diet while I read the book. When I got to that chapter, I gave up the foolish idea! (Not that YOU are foolish, but sometimes our culturally induced desperation to lose the weight NOW makes us ACT foolishly even though we are intelligent and reasonable). Hope that helps :) Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

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Thanks Jess! Yesterday I was actually considering doing the WW core plan and IE together! That's what a crazy mood I was in. I feel a lot better today and I'm going to start reading the IE book again. And like you said I think I need a refresher in "reject the diet mentality" and the effects of dieting on the body. And yes I was foolish! Thanks for your advice! butterflyjess07 wrote: It doesn't

work! And even if it does, you'll be unhappy while you're doing it and gain it all back when you're finished! You might find it helpful to reread the chapter in the IE book about the physiological effects of dieting too. Before I started following IE, I decided I was going to try one last diet while I read the book. When I got to that chapter, I gave up the foolish idea! (Not that YOU are foolish, but sometimes our culturally induced desperation to lose the weight NOW makes us ACT foolishly even though we are intelligent and reasonable). Hope that helps :) Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

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I could have written this post myself....Stay strong. I'm going to

try to stay strong. One of the biggest hurdles was admitting that I

was slipping back again.

V

> > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been

struggling this week with IE

> Hi ,

> Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual

hand. :)

> How about if you try something radically different? Think about

the good experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down,

congratulate yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you

bought.

> You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic

principles of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize.

> What will your life be like when you have really established IE

skills? What will be different?

> Best wishes,

> lrc

> http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/

>

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk

email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

>

> ---------------------------------

> Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to

Yahoo! Answers.

>

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Guest guest

I could have written this post myself....Stay strong. I'm going to

try to stay strong. One of the biggest hurdles was admitting that I

was slipping back again.

V

> > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been

struggling this week with IE

> Hi ,

> Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual

hand. :)

> How about if you try something radically different? Think about

the good experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down,

congratulate yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you

bought.

> You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic

principles of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize.

> What will your life be like when you have really established IE

skills? What will be different?

> Best wishes,

> lrc

> http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/

>

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk

email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

>

> ---------------------------------

> Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to

Yahoo! Answers.

>

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Guest guest

I could have written this post myself....Stay strong. I'm going to

try to stay strong. One of the biggest hurdles was admitting that I

was slipping back again.

V

> > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been

struggling this week with IE

> Hi ,

> Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual

hand. :)

> How about if you try something radically different? Think about

the good experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down,

congratulate yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you

bought.

> You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic

principles of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize.

> What will your life be like when you have really established IE

skills? What will be different?

> Best wishes,

> lrc

> http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/

>

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk

email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail

>

> ---------------------------------

> Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to

Yahoo! Answers.

>

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EXCELLENT response lrc!!

> > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been struggling

> this week with IE

>

> Hi ,

> Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual hand. :)

>

> How about if you try something radically different? Think about the good

> experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down, congratulate

> yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you bought.

>

> You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic principles

> of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize.

>

> What will your life be like when you have really established IE skills?

> What will be different?

>

> Best wishes,

> lrc

> http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/

> <http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/>

>

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EXCELLENT response lrc!!

> > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been struggling

> this week with IE

>

> Hi ,

> Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual hand. :)

>

> How about if you try something radically different? Think about the good

> experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down, congratulate

> yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you bought.

>

> You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic principles

> of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize.

>

> What will your life be like when you have really established IE skills?

> What will be different?

>

> Best wishes,

> lrc

> http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/

> <http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/>

>

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EXCELLENT response lrc!!

> > Hi everyone! Will someone slap me please??!! I've been struggling

> this week with IE

>

> Hi ,

> Ouch. Slapping would hurt both your virtual face and my virtual hand. :)

>

> How about if you try something radically different? Think about the good

> experiences IE has already brought you. Write them down, congratulate

> yourself. Dress up a little bit in those new clothes you bought.

>

> You don't have to perform perfectly once you learn the basic principles

> of IE - you just have to keep your eyes on the prize.

>

> What will your life be like when you have really established IE skills?

> What will be different?

>

> Best wishes,

> lrc

> http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/

> <http://livingrainbowcolor.wordpress.com/>

>

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I'm so glad I could help. This group is great for those times when you

need advice quickly from people who are right there with you. I have

had similar feelings lately so I can definitely relate!

>

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I'm so glad I could help. This group is great for those times when you

need advice quickly from people who are right there with you. I have

had similar feelings lately so I can definitely relate!

>

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  • 2 months later...

Hello everyone!

Hope you're enjoying your weekends. Well. I'm officially going off the

deep end. I can't tell if I'm hungry or satisfied.

I feel guilty for eating. I'm burnout with exercise. I think I strained

something lifting weights yesterday so now I'm in a panic that I'll

have to stop doing high impact or weights and I'll get fat.

I hate how I look. I'm sick of thinking about this crap and I'm still

thinking about food--what will I eat today? How much? How little? I

shouldn't be eating grains/grains are acidic. I shouldn't be eating

meat meat is acidic. Alcohol is bad. Sugar is bad.

These birth control pills are screwing with my moods. Triphasic pill

indeed, week 1 jittery and paranoid, week 2 depressed, week 3

irrationally angry.

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Please - anyone who's been at the low point described below and found

a way to sanity - tell me your story.

I so resonate with this post. I was just today feeling the urge to

post here about my struggles with my recent weight gain and the

quandary I'm in right now. I simply cannot return to dieting

(although it beckons to me more than ever) but at the same time

cannot tolerate the additional weight I am carrying on my body. The

worst part is that I feel like I trust myself less now and might even

be losing trust that IE is a viable solution for me. I am so stuck.

As I look back over my " mistakes, " I wonder if the weight crept on

from my once or twice a week indulgences of my favorite forbidden

food, cake. Or if it came from sometimes eating past the point of

hunger. Or even from the rebellious moments I had against IE when I

ate just to eat. I can safely say it's not from lack of exercise (I

ran 14 miles on Sunday). I'm just not at peace right now, and I feel

like I have no where to go for relief.

>

> Hello everyone!

>

> Hope you're enjoying your weekends. Well. I'm officially going off

the

> deep end. I can't tell if I'm hungry or satisfied.

> I feel guilty for eating. I'm burnout with exercise. I think I

strained

> something lifting weights yesterday so now I'm in a panic that I'll

> have to stop doing high impact or weights and I'll get fat.

> I hate how I look. I'm sick of thinking about this crap and I'm

still

> thinking about food--what will I eat today? How much? How little? I

> shouldn't be eating grains/grains are acidic. I shouldn't be eating

> meat meat is acidic. Alcohol is bad. Sugar is bad.

> These birth control pills are screwing with my moods. Triphasic

pill

> indeed, week 1 jittery and paranoid, week 2 depressed, week 3

> irrationally angry.

>

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Marguerite:

Your post has summarized exactly how I'm feeling--even better than my

original rant!

Every single word of it. Especially, the " too many treats " , eating

when not hungry or past fullness, etc.

I can't go back to starving or tracking and weighing, yet I can't

take how I look.

I feel guilty for being concerned about how I look or wanting to look

a certain way...and I'm not even talking about something unrealistic

either.

I think what makes it more frustrating for us is that we're

exercising like crazy and still gaining or not losing.

Hang in there. Maybe someone will have some words of wisdom! LOL!

>

> Please - anyone who's been at the low point described below and

found

> a way to sanity - tell me your story.

>

> I so resonate with this post. I was just today feeling the urge to

> post here about my struggles with my recent weight gain and the

> quandary I'm in right now. I simply cannot return to dieting

> (although it beckons to me more than ever) but at the same time

> cannot tolerate the additional weight I am carrying on my body.

The

> worst part is that I feel like I trust myself less now and might

even

> be losing trust that IE is a viable solution for me. I am so

stuck.

>

> As I look back over my " mistakes, " I wonder if the weight crept on

> from my once or twice a week indulgences of my favorite forbidden

> food, cake. Or if it came from sometimes eating past the point of

> hunger. Or even from the rebellious moments I had against IE when

I

> ate just to eat. I can safely say it's not from lack of exercise

(I

> ran 14 miles on Sunday). I'm just not at peace right now, and I

feel

> like I have no where to go for relief.

>

>

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I don't know what kind of words will make the need to lose weight go away. But you do have to realize by running 14 miles in one day is bound to build up some muscle. Muscle weighs more than fat. Are you using the scale as your guage for losing or are you using the way your clothes fit to guage? Keep in mind if your body feels it isn't getting enough it will hold on to all it can. So fuel it enough to get you to exercise and the rest will fall into place. I have been doing this for almost a year now and I have only lost 50 pounds, give or take, but I see this as a great accomplishment because I have never kept this much weight off for this long of time. I was usually come off fast and then slowly start to creep up. This is the way to live. I know it....I have a long way to go and I am giving it my all. Michele press182 wrote: Marguerite:Your post has summarized exactly how I'm feeling--even better than my original rant! Every single word of it. Especially, the "too many treats", eating when not hungry or past fullness, etc.I can't go back to starving or tracking and weighing, yet I can't take how I look. I feel guilty for being concerned about how I look or wanting to look a certain way...and I'm not even talking about something unrealistic either. I think what makes it

more frustrating for us is that we're exercising like crazy and still gaining or not losing.Hang in there. Maybe someone will have some words of wisdom! LOL!>> Please - anyone who's been at the low point described below and found > a way to sanity - tell me your story.> > I so resonate with this post. I was just today feeling the urge to > post here about my struggles with my recent weight gain and the > quandary I'm in right now. I simply cannot return to dieting > (although it beckons to me more than ever) but at the same time > cannot tolerate the additional weight I am carrying on my body. The > worst part is that I feel like I trust myself less now and might even > be losing trust that IE is a

viable solution for me. I am so stuck. > > As I look back over my "mistakes," I wonder if the weight crept on > from my once or twice a week indulgences of my favorite forbidden > food, cake. Or if it came from sometimes eating past the point of > hunger. Or even from the rebellious moments I had against IE when I > ate just to eat. I can safely say it's not from lack of exercise (I > ran 14 miles on Sunday). I'm just not at peace right now, and I feel > like I have no where to go for relief. > > Michele Currently Reading: Twilight

by Meyer Recently Read: Specials by Westerfeld

Don't let your dream ride pass you by. Make it a reality with Yahoo! Autos.

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>I was just today feeling the urge to

> post here about my struggles with my recent weight gain and the

> quandary I'm in right now. I simply cannot return to dieting

> (although it beckons to me more than ever) but at the same time

> cannot tolerate the additional weight I am carrying on my body.

..... I can safely say it's not from lack of exercise (I

> ran 14 miles on Sunday). I'm just not at peace right now, and I

feel like I have no where to go for relief.

>

Pardon my curiosity, but have you closely examined the reasons WHY

you feel you're not able to tolerate the additional weight? Is life

itself (everything and everyone significant in your world) really

being negatively affected by your weight? How? Is it actually all

that much of a gain, or (if you can possibly somehow look at it

through objective eyes) are you very sensitive to a small weight

increase? I can understand that if you've really kept a tight rein

on every little pound for a long time, even a small amount must be

emotionally significant. Perhaps it's the FEAR of weight gain itself

which is hampering the development of truly intuitive eating for you

right now - mentally, perhaps you're on a diet-which-isn't-really-a-

diet. Have you truly ditched the diets for good, and made peace with

that fact, no matter what the weight consequences?

Sorry, these are just random thoughts that might give you something

to work on, but I don't have an answer. :-( Just hugs and

encouragement to hang in there.

BTW, honey - anyone who can run 14 miles is AWESOME in my book!!

s

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> Perhaps it's the FEAR of weight gain itself > which is hampering the development of truly intuitive eating for you > right now - mentally, perhaps you're on a diet-which-isn't-really-a-> diet. Have you truly ditched the diets for good, and made peace with > that fact, no matter what the weight consequences?>> >> > Not Margurite, but I was the author of the rant, that spawned Margurite's rant.

You know, I'm glad you posted this. Because I think you hit it on the head. I guess I really haven't truly ditched the diets. I don't trust myself and to be honest the size my body maintained without dieting is not my ideal.

My husband and I have been fighting over this issue. I was unhealthy, and I refuse to accept that the weight I was at was unhealthy. I know I have body image issues, too and my upbringing where weight and appearance were so important distorts things.

He's actually getting tired of it and wants me to just stop focusing on not just weight, but on food itself.

As far as the weight, he echoes many of your sentiments. "Who cares if you do gain weight?" "Can't you focus on the positives?" "Why does it matter so much? It doesn't!"

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Again, I so resonate with everything said here. I recognized a few

months back that I had morphed IE into a diet of sorts, and I think

that has been the source of my struggle. I worry when I find myself

at times " rebelling " against the instruction to stop eating when full

in the same way that I would rebel against diets by binging, etc.

But I wonder how much of this is me truly, truly cleaning out the

diet mentality, so to speak. Each time I look at myself rebelling

and recognize that I am doing this, I'm that much closer to possibly

changing my attitude. I also wonder how much of this comes from a

deep-seated desire to (1) be controlled by something like a diet, and

(2) sabotage myself when I find that I am able to succeed at trusting

myself. Has anyone else experienced this?

Anyway, I'm with you, press182. Hang in there!

>

>

>

> > Perhaps it's the FEAR of weight gain itself

> > which is hampering the development of truly intuitive eating for

you

> > right now - mentally, perhaps you're on a diet-which-isn't-really-

a-

> > diet. Have you truly ditched the diets for good, and made peace

with

> > that fact, no matter what the weight consequences?

> >

> >

> >>

> > Not Margurite, but I was the author of the rant, that spawned

> Margurite's rant.

>

> You know, I'm glad you posted this. Because I think you hit it on

the

> head. I guess I really haven't truly ditched the diets. I don't

trust

> myself and to be honest the size my body maintained without dieting

is

> not my ideal.

>

>

> My husband and I have been fighting over this issue. I was

unhealthy,

> and I refuse to accept that the weight I was at was unhealthy. I

know I

> have body image issues, too and my upbringing where weight and

> appearance were so important distorts things.

>

> He's actually getting tired of it and wants me to just stop

focusing on

> not just weight, but on food itself.

>

> As far as the weight, he echoes many of your sentiments. " Who cares

if

> you do gain weight? " " Can't you focus on the positives? " " Why does

it

> matter so much? It doesn't! "

>

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First off, Marguerite, that has got to be hard for you having been a

fitness competitor. Heh, I was just gaga over being a loose size 4.

My body was no near perfect still.

Second, Yes! That's it! I too find myself " rebelling against the

instruction to stop eating when full " . Oh, and if I did, I freaked

out.

I turned IE into the " hardly eat one day then overeat the next " , diet.

I'm afraid to eat.

I'm afraid too that if I'm truly not hungry, I won't have energy to

workout or I'll binge later after working out. If that makes sense.

I think it's fear of one instance of slightly overeating (maybe)

turning into several days of binging.

I have a fear of eating too much junk. Then getting cancer from the

sugar/salt/fat/meat/carbs etc. I keep thinking I'm " immature " because

I can't imagine a life without chocolate, or potato chips. Mature

people eat their veggies, fruits and clean food.

I was contemplating going on the " Abs Diet " because at least I'd be

eating at regular intervals.

You know, that's a good question regarding the " desire to be

controlled by something " and the parts about self sabotage.

Interesting points.

>

> Again, I so resonate with everything said here. I recognized a few

> months back that I had morphed IE into a diet of sorts, and I think

> that has been the source of my struggle. I worry when I find

myself

> at times " rebelling " against the instruction to stop eating when

full

> in the same way that I would rebel against diets by binging, etc.

> But I wonder how much of this is me truly, truly cleaning out the

> diet mentality, so to speak. Each time I look at myself rebelling

> and recognize that I am doing this, I'm that much closer to

possibly

> changing my attitude. I also wonder how much of this comes from a

> deep-seated desire to (1) be controlled by something like a diet,

and

> (2) sabotage myself when I find that I am able to succeed at

trusting

> myself. Has anyone else experienced this?

>

> Anyway, I'm with you, press182. Hang in there!

>

>

>

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Our stories are remarkably similar. I so hear you about freaking out

when you don't feel like you've eaten enough. I've been so

indoctrinated by the " eating plans " for bodybuilding and fitness that

I have to eat enough calories to sustain my workouts and build muscle

that I am now so afraid of eating less. Of course, I'm now training

for a marathon and struggling with the great irony that I've gained

weight, so that also makes me wonder if I'm undereating for my level

of activity and triggering a " starvation " response. This all just

contributes to feeling paralyzed about making simple meal decisions

and not knowing whether or not to trust myself.

Interesting that you are also contemplating various diets. I'm there

too but can't shake everything I've read about how damaging diets

are. I try to remind myself that dieting is what brought on this

pain in the first place.

> >

> > Again, I so resonate with everything said here. I recognized a

few

> > months back that I had morphed IE into a diet of sorts, and I

think

> > that has been the source of my struggle. I worry when I find

> myself

> > at times " rebelling " against the instruction to stop eating when

> full

> > in the same way that I would rebel against diets by binging,

etc.

> > But I wonder how much of this is me truly, truly cleaning out the

> > diet mentality, so to speak. Each time I look at myself

rebelling

> > and recognize that I am doing this, I'm that much closer to

> possibly

> > changing my attitude. I also wonder how much of this comes from

a

> > deep-seated desire to (1) be controlled by something like a diet,

> and

> > (2) sabotage myself when I find that I am able to succeed at

> trusting

> > myself. Has anyone else experienced this?

> >

> > Anyway, I'm with you, press182. Hang in there!

> >

> >

> >

>

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Thank you for the reality check and also for the words of support!

> >I was just today feeling the urge to

> > post here about my struggles with my recent weight gain and the

> > quandary I'm in right now. I simply cannot return to dieting

> > (although it beckons to me more than ever) but at the same time

> > cannot tolerate the additional weight I am carrying on my body.

> .... I can safely say it's not from lack of exercise (I

> > ran 14 miles on Sunday). I'm just not at peace right now, and I

> feel like I have no where to go for relief.

> >

>

> Pardon my curiosity, but have you closely examined the reasons WHY

> you feel you're not able to tolerate the additional weight? Is

life

> itself (everything and everyone significant in your world) really

> being negatively affected by your weight? How? Is it actually all

> that much of a gain, or (if you can possibly somehow look at it

> through objective eyes) are you very sensitive to a small weight

> increase? I can understand that if you've really kept a tight rein

> on every little pound for a long time, even a small amount must be

> emotionally significant. Perhaps it's the FEAR of weight gain

itself

> which is hampering the development of truly intuitive eating for

you

> right now - mentally, perhaps you're on a diet-which-isn't-really-a-

> diet. Have you truly ditched the diets for good, and made peace

with

> that fact, no matter what the weight consequences?

>

> Sorry, these are just random thoughts that might give you something

> to work on, but I don't have an answer. :-( Just hugs and

> encouragement to hang in there.

>

> BTW, honey - anyone who can run 14 miles is AWESOME in my book!!

>

> s

>

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My husband has struggled along with my eating disorder.  He

hates it.  Every aspect about it.  In the past, I’ve put him in the

position of being The Food Police.  That’s not fair and I’ve

apologized for it. 

When I share with him my intention to take an action and I’m

not fully successful 100% of the time, he becomes frustrated.  So, I’ve

decided to not involve him in my recovery.  I won’t talk to him of my

struggles.  I won’t talk to him about any plans of action.  I won’t

seek his advice.  I have other sources of help and use them.

It’s sad to me that I can’t count on his

emotional support without judgment.  In the 7 ½ years that I’ve been in a

12-step program, his behavior has never changed.  So, I’ve proclaimed my

recovery efforts off-limits to him.  He’s not detached enough to listen

without judging so I’m not going to continue to open that world of hurt.

Suzanne

Re: Struggling

Posted by:

" press182 " press182@...

press182

Wed Oct 3, 2007 8:42 am (PST)

You know, I'm glad you posted this. Because I think you hit it on the

head. I guess I really haven't truly ditched the diets. I don't trust

myself and to be honest the size my body maintained without dieting is

not my ideal.

My husband and I have been fighting over this issue. I was unhealthy,

and I refuse to accept that the weight I was at was unhealthy. I know I

have body image issues, too and my upbringing where weight and

appearance were so important distorts things.

He's actually getting tired of it and wants me to just stop focusing on

not just weight, but on food itself.

As far as the weight, he echoes many of your sentiments. " Who cares if

you do gain weight? " " Can't you focus on the positives? "

" Why does it

matter so much? It doesn't! "

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