Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

[Guest guest]

-

It is Munchausen's syndrome by proxy. There is a web site MAMA or if you look

up Munchausen's, it will explain it.

Michele

[Guest guest]

It is Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy and you can go to a site called Mother's

Against Munchhausen Syndrome.How come you need to know, are you being

accused?We are dealing with this issue right now, that's why I ask.

>

>Reply-To: Mitoonelist

>To: " mito support group " <mitoonelist>

>Subject: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>Date: Tue, 5 Oct 1999 19:51:28 -0700

>

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[Guest guest]

Thank you Michele. S.

Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>From: MichSull@...

>

>-

>It is Munchausen's syndrome by proxy. There is a web site MAMA or if you

look

>up Munchausen's, it will explain it.

>Michele

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

I have watched all the talk about this with interest as before it ever came

up on the list I was telling my therapist how my daughter-in-law does the

strangest things about medical stuff and how it is like she almost gets off

on the kids pain or fear. My therapist gave me that name & agreed with what

I was saying, but of course like all the rest of this mess I have just sat

back and watched not wanting to accuse anyone of anything if I wasn't

positive it was true. What a horrible thing to do and also what a

devastating thing to be accused of. I kept thinking it is just some other

explanation-she has SO many problems. One day I mentioned this disorder to

Connie altho not by name and lo and behold she knew all about it!! For a

person who has so many mental etc problems she seems to know the oddest

infor. Maybe she gets a lot of it out of the love novels and soapies?? I can

imagine this disorder being somewhere in one of those as it would make for a

dramatic story. (Of course I wasn't accusing her, just said I heard of this

problem where some moms do this and how sick that was.)

But like so many other problems she just keeps adding up negative points and

I just keep fighting the feelings of having to protect the boys at all

costs-even if it isn't her fault on purpose. Like the boys counselor told me

I have to not feel sorry for her and then put the boys in jeparty. No matter

what reason it is, if she cannot care for them or meet their needs then they

must be in the care of someone who can.

I have also had suspicians now that the boys have been here so many wks from

things they have said and done of possible sexual abuse, but again am so

afraid to speak up unless I am positive. Again what a horrifying thing to be

accused of.

So I want infor. on this disorder to be certain what I am looking at or

for.

I've not said anything on this list either as I know with the problems the

mito kids have none of you is guilty of this (I mean I know I don't

personally know any of you, but no one sounds wierd like Connie or any other

wierd person I've ever known.) so I don't BELIEVE any of you is guilty of

this. And I have heard your pain and your children's delimas from these

accusations.

One good thing is that the boys caseworker is so normal and down to earth I

know she is someone who wouldn't just grab at straws. She would try her

hardest too to see what could really be going on.

I am really torn between making sure the boys stay safe and not wrongfully

hurting someone else.

I also feel her pain at her children being taken from her and I try hard to

assure her they are safe and happy, altho even that is a 2 edged sword as

she feels upset they are so happy, doing so well, and progressing so fast

here. One of the things that made her so angry before she lost the boys was

that they liked me better! It was like a child thing. It put the boys and I

in a horrible bind. She even asked the therapist why do they like her

better-I am jealous-and the therapist told her they felt safe etc. with me

and were having their needs met. They would scream & throw awful fits to

come with me whenever I had to leave. Connie said how can I make them like

me better than her and the therapist (thouroughly frustrated with her by

that time)said, " Quit abusing them!), DA!

Connie told my other daughter in law, " Now that I don't have the boys Shane

and I can work on OUR relationship. " Gee, after 30 yrs of kids I wish my

husband and I could have any time or energy to work on OUR relationship.

That comment really hurt and floored me.

Thanks for listening to my complaints and worries and the only reason they

are related to this list is that I know my family has some sort of mito

issues altho we have not been able to get a diagnosis and that so many of

our problems stem from those disabilities as in this case it takes a special

person to care for a mito child and she can't even care for a normal child.

Also, Connie has some demylenization happening to her and will not get

chked. It could be confined to her arm from a birth defect or for all I know

be everywhere including her brain. It is not my problem tho if her or my son

won't chk on it or tend to it and again the boys can't be put at risk if

they make a poor decision.

S.

Manchesens or whatever you call it

>>Date: Tue, 5 Oct 1999 19:51:28 -0700

>>

>><< text2.html >>

>><< text3.html >>

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

, I have also followed your problems with this and my heart breaks for

you and your family. I am so sorry this has happened to you. S.

Manchesens or whatever you call it

>>Date: Tue, 5 Oct 1999 19:51:28 -0700

>>

>><< text2.html >>

>><< text3.html >>

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

, I have also followed your problems with this and my heart breaks for

you and your family. I am so sorry this has happened to you. S.

Manchesens or whatever you call it

>>Date: Tue, 5 Oct 1999 19:51:28 -0700

>>

>><< text2.html >>

>><< text3.html >>

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

, I have also followed your problems with this and my heart breaks for

you and your family. I am so sorry this has happened to you. S.

Manchesens or whatever you call it

>>Date: Tue, 5 Oct 1999 19:51:28 -0700

>>

>><< text2.html >>

>><< text3.html >>

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

,

Do you mean Munchausens???

ruth

[Guest guest]

,

Do you mean Munchausens???

ruth

[Guest guest]

,

Do you mean Munchausens???

ruth

[Guest guest]

Yes, ruth. I wrote a long post about why I wanted to know this morning. I'm

very frustrated with my son and his wife and very much not wanting to raise

these 2 grandsons, but I want them to be safe, healthy, and happy. S.

Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>From: Hilandgang@...

>

>,

>Do you mean Munchausens???

>

>ruth

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

Yes, ruth. I wrote a long post about why I wanted to know this morning. I'm

very frustrated with my son and his wife and very much not wanting to raise

these 2 grandsons, but I want them to be safe, healthy, and happy. S.

Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>From: Hilandgang@...

>

>,

>Do you mean Munchausens???

>

>ruth

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

Yes, ruth. I wrote a long post about why I wanted to know this morning. I'm

very frustrated with my son and his wife and very much not wanting to raise

these 2 grandsons, but I want them to be safe, healthy, and happy. S.

Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>From: Hilandgang@...

>

>,

>Do you mean Munchausens???

>

>ruth

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks ,it has been ver hard.We fortunately have a lot of community

support and a great pediatrician.We go to trial on Nov.8th to fight this

accusation.There is no evidence of abuse,never has been, so we are confident

we will get Jonah home.The pediatrician says it srems from ignorance

surrounding mito disorders, here in Canada.The first thing we want to do

when Jonah is back is to get him Dr.Shoffner so there is someone following

him that understands the disease.Hopefully all will go well, we have to

bring in a specialist from the US for our defense, it is so expensive.Jonah

is well though and crawled for the first time two days ago while he was with

us.We see him inour home 3 hrs a day every day.He has been doing great ever

since being put on the right formula.Anyway, thank you for thinking of

us.Take care!

>

>Reply-To: Mitoonelist

>To: <Mitoonelist>

>Subject: Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>Date: Wed, 6 Oct 1999 09:35:58 -0700

>

>, I have also followed your problems with this and my heart breaks

>for

>you and your family. I am so sorry this has happened to you. S.

>

> Manchesens or whatever you call it

> >>Date: Tue, 5 Oct 1999 19:51:28 -0700

> >>

> >><< text2.html >>

> >><< text3.html >>

> >

> >>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

>affected by mitochondrial disease.

> >

>

>

>------------------------------------------------------------------------

>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

>affected by mitochondrial disease.

><< text3.html >>

[Guest guest]

,

I read your post after I asked--sorry for the lag. I really hope that your

daughter-in-law doesn't have this terrible disorder. It seems, though, that

you are in a tough position anyway......

Hoping all the best for you and your family,

ruth

[Guest guest]

-

It sounds as though she has severe emotional problems and needs help for

herself. I hope that doesn't offend you. Michele

[Guest guest]

I got to read some of the web stuff describing that and that is not what she

does. What I am saying she does is like she gave Andy ice crm the other day

after we got back from the Drs and he had bronchitis and both ears infected

and when I said, No, that's milk which he is allergic too (da, per the ear

infect and congestion) she says, I know, and gets a strange Mona like

smile, but just a little won't hurt him.

When he is really afraid or hurting she will laugh. And she will go on and

on about something like when he needs a shot instead of letting it lie quiet

until time and then helping him be brave.

She also overdramatises everything. I won't go into it all in detail. But

that doesn't sound the same as this other thing. S.

Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>From: Hilandgang@...

>

>,

>I read your post after I asked--sorry for the lag. I really hope that your

>daughter-in-law doesn't have this terrible disorder. It seems, though,

that

>you are in a tough position anyway......

>

>Hoping all the best for you and your family,

>

>ruth

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

Michele, This doesn't offend me, heavens, I'm sitting here with her 2 kids

because I am the one who called 911 on 's bruising (along with other

reports they had) and I am the one who prays every night that she NEVER has

them again.

BUT if I MYSELF don't get a break soon, I am going to lose it. Already I

take some of my medications just to survive all the grandkid problems-stress

help.

And I am trying for a new plan between my son and I if CPS will go for it

that should give me a lot of relief.

S.

Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>From: MichSull@...

>

>-

>It sounds as though she has severe emotional problems and needs help for

>herself. I hope that doesn't offend you. Michele

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

Michele, This doesn't offend me, heavens, I'm sitting here with her 2 kids

because I am the one who called 911 on 's bruising (along with other

reports they had) and I am the one who prays every night that she NEVER has

them again.

BUT if I MYSELF don't get a break soon, I am going to lose it. Already I

take some of my medications just to survive all the grandkid problems-stress

help.

And I am trying for a new plan between my son and I if CPS will go for it

that should give me a lot of relief.

S.

Re: Manchesens or whatever you call it

>From: MichSull@...

>

>-

>It sounds as though she has severe emotional problems and needs help for

>herself. I hope that doesn't offend you. Michele

>

>>Brought to you by www.imdn.org - an on-line support group for those

affected by mitochondrial disease.

>

[Guest guest]

,

I don't know, I think it does have overtones........eek!

ruth

[Guest guest]

,

I don't know, I think it does have overtones........eek!

ruth