the bumpy road

[Guest guest]

When I started IE, I made a commitment to myself to focus on the positive things about my body, and have been riding high on how well my body is performing in regards to strength training (I can totally kick my fiance's butt when it comes to push-ups and stuff! ). That, and eating what I want has been really fun. That having been said I am a huge "foodie", and have been over-eating. I've been trying little tricks, like drinking a glass of water before every meal, and pausing in the middle to re-examine my hunger level, but it hasn't been working that well. I guess I still don't know how to gage when to stop-my mouth keeps saying yes! long after my stomach is saying no! (or should be), so I end up with that uncomfortably full feeling after almost ever time I eat. Also, I caved after 3+ months, and weighed myself, and I've gained back virtually every pound I fought so hard to lose, which really bummed me out. I keep telling my self to focus on the positive: how great it is to have a strong/healthy body, what a true pleasure it is to eat foods I love and had been denying myself, and how IE is affecting my relationships with my fiance/friends. (I have had soooo many voice to me how happy they are that I'm finally not dieting.) Going to parties and out to dinner is so much more fun-I don't think obsessively about what I should and shouldn't have, but really want, the whole time I'm there-I just enjoy myself, but I'm having a hard time fighting the chubby girl image that is stuck in my head. I'm trying to stay focused on the good stuff, and believe in the process, but am having a hard time suppressing the disgust I feel about my physical shape, and have found myself slipping back in to the routines of calorie counting, and second guessing everything I put in my mouth. Anyone else going through this? Any help or advice out there? Thanks for being there! Inti Inti St. ClairPhotographyc: o: www.intistclair.com