Re: sorry its been so long

[Guest guest]

<< I'm only 20 and have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's not

even worth

it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but I don't want to go to

hell for killing myself and I also wonder what will be next,

maybe I don't want to miss something. >>

Ruth,

I have been in that same place. You will find your cure. Please don't give

up. You will not always feel this way, with this pain-- things will get

better, and you will get relief! Hang in there!

I know that when I was in the middle of my burning agony, I wanted nothing

more than to die. It went on for over two years. There seemed to be no

answer. My mother, my sister, my Dad and all of my friends rallied around me

and would not give up. I received excellent information on this list and the

support was exceptional and caring. The things I learned here, helped me to

find my " cure " .

You will find yours. One good woman on this list gave me advice that all but

saved my life outright. She told me to forget about finding a cure--and to

get myself out of pain which would enable me to think more clearly, stop

crying and allow the depression to lift a little. She told me that once the

pain was under control, I could consider and try more options.

She was very right. Controlling the pain was the cure for me.

I am praying for you tonight that you find the strength and courage to go on;

and that you get relief from the pain. You have so many wonderful things

ahead of you in your life. The research position at sounds

wonderful. You are a truly courageous woman and very strong if you are

getting through school and living your life in spite of this horrible

disorder. That strength will help you to survive this and overcome it.

There is hope! Hang in there!

God bless,

Anne

[Guest guest]

<< I'm only 20 and have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's not

even worth

it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but I don't want to go to

hell for killing myself and I also wonder what will be next,

maybe I don't want to miss something. >>

Ruth,

I have been in that same place. You will find your cure. Please don't give

up. You will not always feel this way, with this pain-- things will get

better, and you will get relief! Hang in there!

I know that when I was in the middle of my burning agony, I wanted nothing

more than to die. It went on for over two years. There seemed to be no

answer. My mother, my sister, my Dad and all of my friends rallied around me

and would not give up. I received excellent information on this list and the

support was exceptional and caring. The things I learned here, helped me to

find my " cure " .

You will find yours. One good woman on this list gave me advice that all but

saved my life outright. She told me to forget about finding a cure--and to

get myself out of pain which would enable me to think more clearly, stop

crying and allow the depression to lift a little. She told me that once the

pain was under control, I could consider and try more options.

She was very right. Controlling the pain was the cure for me.

I am praying for you tonight that you find the strength and courage to go on;

and that you get relief from the pain. You have so many wonderful things

ahead of you in your life. The research position at sounds

wonderful. You are a truly courageous woman and very strong if you are

getting through school and living your life in spite of this horrible

disorder. That strength will help you to survive this and overcome it.

There is hope! Hang in there!

God bless,

Anne

[Guest guest]

Ruth,

I saw Dr. Kauffman on Monday. He wants me to try

biofeedback with someone in Houston. He said that it

seems to have a better success rate than surgery.

--- nor_germ wrote:

> Hi all,

> I've been so busy and talking on this group makes me

> more depressed,

> I don't want to think about it. Well, the semester

> is almost over,

> I'm almost a Junior at university of houston. I

> will be seeing a new

> doc on May 6th and hopefully have my 3rd and final

> surgery soon after

> that. Good news: I have been accepted for a

> research position at MD

> Cancer Research Center this summer (for

> undergraduates). I

> am so scared that this new doc will blow me off like

> all the others

> or cut me up just for the hell of it, like the last

> 2 surgeries. I

> pray to God that this will end, b/c if it doesn't, I

> will find some

> way to end it. I cannot handle this much longer.

> I'm only 20 and

> have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's

> not even worth

> it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but

> I don't want to

> go to hell for killing myself and I also wonder what

> will be next,

> maybe I don't want to miss something.

> Love,

> Ruth

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Ruth,

I saw Dr. Kauffman on Monday. He wants me to try

biofeedback with someone in Houston. He said that it

seems to have a better success rate than surgery.

--- nor_germ wrote:

> Hi all,

> I've been so busy and talking on this group makes me

> more depressed,

> I don't want to think about it. Well, the semester

> is almost over,

> I'm almost a Junior at university of houston. I

> will be seeing a new

> doc on May 6th and hopefully have my 3rd and final

> surgery soon after

> that. Good news: I have been accepted for a

> research position at MD

> Cancer Research Center this summer (for

> undergraduates). I

> am so scared that this new doc will blow me off like

> all the others

> or cut me up just for the hell of it, like the last

> 2 surgeries. I

> pray to God that this will end, b/c if it doesn't, I

> will find some

> way to end it. I cannot handle this much longer.

> I'm only 20 and

> have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's

> not even worth

> it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but

> I don't want to

> go to hell for killing myself and I also wonder what

> will be next,

> maybe I don't want to miss something.

> Love,

> Ruth

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Ruth

Congrats! see there are possitive things on the horizon You will get control of this just don't give up! This next surgery might be the thing that does it for you,and if not you will find something that works. What kind of surgery are you having done? Are they removing the damaged tissue? or trying to?

I am seeing a new doc soon too and also hope she will at least have a game plan, I get tired of treating myself for for this mystery curse. You are so young, I thought I was too young to have to go through this but you are just starting your life, there is so much ahead. Hang in there and I will pray that God will get you through this, get all of us through it!

Stay tough!

Daphne

sorry its been so long

Hi all,I've been so busy and talking on this group makes me more depressed, I don't want to think about it. Well, the semester is almost over, I'm almost a Junior at university of houston. I will be seeing a new doc on May 6th and hopefully have my 3rd and final surgery soon after that. Good news: I have been accepted for a research position at MD Cancer Research Center this summer (for undergraduates). I am so scared that this new doc will blow me off like all the others or cut me up just for the hell of it, like the last 2 surgeries. I pray to God that this will end, b/c if it doesn't, I will find some way to end it. I cannot handle this much longer. I'm only 20 and have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's not even worth it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but I don't want to go to hell for killing myself and I also wonder what will be next, maybe I don't want to miss something. Love,Ruth*****END OF MESSAGE*****-------------------------------------------------To post message: VulvarDisorders To Subscribe: VulvarDisorders-subscribe Unsubscribe: VulvarDisorders-unsubscribe List owner: VulvarDisorders-owner *****

[Guest guest]

Ruth

Congrats! see there are possitive things on the horizon You will get control of this just don't give up! This next surgery might be the thing that does it for you,and if not you will find something that works. What kind of surgery are you having done? Are they removing the damaged tissue? or trying to?

I am seeing a new doc soon too and also hope she will at least have a game plan, I get tired of treating myself for for this mystery curse. You are so young, I thought I was too young to have to go through this but you are just starting your life, there is so much ahead. Hang in there and I will pray that God will get you through this, get all of us through it!

Stay tough!

Daphne

sorry its been so long

Hi all,I've been so busy and talking on this group makes me more depressed, I don't want to think about it. Well, the semester is almost over, I'm almost a Junior at university of houston. I will be seeing a new doc on May 6th and hopefully have my 3rd and final surgery soon after that. Good news: I have been accepted for a research position at MD Cancer Research Center this summer (for undergraduates). I am so scared that this new doc will blow me off like all the others or cut me up just for the hell of it, like the last 2 surgeries. I pray to God that this will end, b/c if it doesn't, I will find some way to end it. I cannot handle this much longer. I'm only 20 and have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's not even worth it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but I don't want to go to hell for killing myself and I also wonder what will be next, maybe I don't want to miss something. Love,Ruth*****END OF MESSAGE*****-------------------------------------------------To post message: VulvarDisorders To Subscribe: VulvarDisorders-subscribe Unsubscribe: VulvarDisorders-unsubscribe List owner: VulvarDisorders-owner *****

[Guest guest]

First of all, I’m not trying to be mean here, but people don’t go to hell for killing themselves. My father killed himself and I’m pretty sure he isn’t in hell. I think if murderers can go to heaven, people who commit suicide have a pretty good chance too. I could go on to list the instances in the Bible where suicide did not warrant a trip to hell (I researched this after my father's death, because attitudes like this bothered me so much); in fact, one such person was taken directly to heaven by God after he killed himself . I could also go on about how in the Middle Ages priest began to preach that if you killed yourself you would go to hell, because in fact, the suicide rate was alarmingly high and rising, as people sought to go to this afterworld that was so much better than their reality. The whole premise behind suiciders going to hell is a man-made church thing and has nothing to do with God. My dad's family is Catholic and I had to deal with their BS ignorant views and the stigma of suicide on top of the nightmare of his being dead. I’m sorry that I’m just focusing on this one aspect of your post, when you are obviously in a lot of pain, but it really bothers me when I see people insensitively spout this ignorant, totally false view.

Now that I've said that, I realy hope you feel better. I think things will get better for all of us, I think the key is to keep going no matter what, to never give up. S

nor_germ wrote: Hi all,I've been so busy and talking on this group makes me more depressed, I don't want to think about it. Well, the semester is almost over, I'm almost a Junior at university of houston. I will be seeing a new doc on May 6th and hopefully have my 3rd and final surgery soon after that. Good news: I have been accepted for a research position at MD Cancer Research Center this summer (for undergraduates). I am so scared that this new doc will blow me off like all the others or cut me up just for the hell of it, like the last 2 surgeries. I pray to God that this will end, b/c if it doesn't, I will find some way to end it. I cannot handle this much longer. I'm only 20 and have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's not even worth it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but I don't want to go to hell for killing myself and I also wonder what will be next, maybe I don't want to miss something. Love,Ruth*****END OF MESSAGE*****-------------------------------------------------To post message: VulvarDisorders To Subscribe: VulvarDisorders-subscribe Unsubscribe: VulvarDisorders-unsubscribe List owner: VulvarDisorders-owner *****

[Guest guest]

I am sure that most of us know someone who has committed suicide. I would also

not be surprised if many of us had a relative who did so. A person's suicide

for whatever reason hurts and causes untold grief and oftentimes guilt for those

left behind.

We all share a condition which is hard to bear but can be borne. We have all

coped with it and hopefully are strong enough to continue to do so with the aim

of perhaps helping others who share our condition cope with it. The

consequences (heaven or hell) are unknown and this forum is not the place to get

into that kind of thread. We will never know the answer to that question and it

will not come here.

I have the greatest sympathy for anyone who knows anyone who has committed

suicide because I am in that category and I know what it is like.

Ora

>

>First of all, I’m not trying to be mean here, but people don’t go to hell for

killing themselves. My father killed himself and I’m pretty sure he isn’t in

hell. I think if murderers can go to heaven, people who commit suicide have a

pretty good chance too. I could go on to list the instances in the Bible where

suicide did not warrant a trip to hell (I researched this after my father's

death, because attitudes like this bothered me so much); in fact, one such

person was taken directly to heaven by God after he killed himself . I could

also go on about how in the Middle Ages priest began to preach that if you

killed yourself you would go to hell, because in fact, the suicide rate was

alarmingly high and rising, as people sought to go to this afterworld that was

so much better than their reality. The whole premise behind suiciders going to

hell is a man-made church thing and has nothing to do with God. My dad's family

is Catholic and I had to deal with their BS ignorant views and the

>stig

> ma of suicide on top o

>

>Now that I've said that, I realy hope you feel better. I think things will get

better for all of us, I think the key is to keep going no matter what, to never

give up.

>S

> nor_germ wrote: Hi all,

>I've been so busy and talking on this group makes me more depressed,

>I don't want to think about it. Well, the semester is almost over,

>I'm almost a Junior at university of houston. I will be seeing a new

>doc on May 6th and hopefully have my 3rd and final surgery soon after

>that. Good news: I have been accepted for a research position at MD

> Cancer Research Center this summer (for undergraduates). I

>am so scared that this new doc will blow me off like all the others

>or cut me up just for the hell of it, like the last 2 surgeries. I

>pray to God that this will end, b/c if it doesn't, I will find some

>way to end it. I cannot handle this much longer. I'm only 20 and

>have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's not even worth

>it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but I don't want to

>go to hell for killing myself and I also wonder what will be next,

>maybe I don't want to miss something.

>Love,

>Ruth

>

>

>*****END OF MESSAGE*****

>-------------------------------------------------

>To post message: VulvarDisorders

> To Subscribe: VulvarDisorders-subscribe

> Unsubscribe: VulvarDisorders-unsubscribe

> List owner: VulvarDisorders-owner

>

>*****

[Guest guest]

I am sure that most of us know someone who has committed suicide. I would also

not be surprised if many of us had a relative who did so. A person's suicide

for whatever reason hurts and causes untold grief and oftentimes guilt for those

left behind.

We all share a condition which is hard to bear but can be borne. We have all

coped with it and hopefully are strong enough to continue to do so with the aim

of perhaps helping others who share our condition cope with it. The

consequences (heaven or hell) are unknown and this forum is not the place to get

into that kind of thread. We will never know the answer to that question and it

will not come here.

I have the greatest sympathy for anyone who knows anyone who has committed

suicide because I am in that category and I know what it is like.

Ora

>

>First of all, I’m not trying to be mean here, but people don’t go to hell for

killing themselves. My father killed himself and I’m pretty sure he isn’t in

hell. I think if murderers can go to heaven, people who commit suicide have a

pretty good chance too. I could go on to list the instances in the Bible where

suicide did not warrant a trip to hell (I researched this after my father's

death, because attitudes like this bothered me so much); in fact, one such

person was taken directly to heaven by God after he killed himself . I could

also go on about how in the Middle Ages priest began to preach that if you

killed yourself you would go to hell, because in fact, the suicide rate was

alarmingly high and rising, as people sought to go to this afterworld that was

so much better than their reality. The whole premise behind suiciders going to

hell is a man-made church thing and has nothing to do with God. My dad's family

is Catholic and I had to deal with their BS ignorant views and the

>stig

> ma of suicide on top o

>

>Now that I've said that, I realy hope you feel better. I think things will get

better for all of us, I think the key is to keep going no matter what, to never

give up.

>S

> nor_germ wrote: Hi all,

>I've been so busy and talking on this group makes me more depressed,

>I don't want to think about it. Well, the semester is almost over,

>I'm almost a Junior at university of houston. I will be seeing a new

>doc on May 6th and hopefully have my 3rd and final surgery soon after

>that. Good news: I have been accepted for a research position at MD

> Cancer Research Center this summer (for undergraduates). I

>am so scared that this new doc will blow me off like all the others

>or cut me up just for the hell of it, like the last 2 surgeries. I

>pray to God that this will end, b/c if it doesn't, I will find some

>way to end it. I cannot handle this much longer. I'm only 20 and

>have been in pain for 5 yrs. Sometimes I think it's not even worth

>it to be alive if I'm going to be so miserable, but I don't want to

>go to hell for killing myself and I also wonder what will be next,

>maybe I don't want to miss something.

>Love,

>Ruth

>

>

>*****END OF MESSAGE*****

>-------------------------------------------------

>To post message: VulvarDisorders

> To Subscribe: VulvarDisorders-subscribe

> Unsubscribe: VulvarDisorders-unsubscribe

> List owner: VulvarDisorders-owner

>

>*****

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I didn't mean to offend anyone. My friend killed himself and I do

believe that he is in heaven, he was a great person. It's just that

it's been so driven into me and it's scary enough to think of death,

without thinking about you causing your own death. I don't want to

impose on anyone's beliefs, but for the past yrs, it seems like God

doesn't listen me at all. Like He wants me to die and he's trying to

push me over the edge by making me suffer so much. Ya'll might think

that's a stupid idea, but I believe it. Your supposed to get comfort

from your religion, whatever it may be, but I get no comfort from

it. It's like all I have to depend on is myself, which isn't much.

I just wish I had some comfort in these horrible times, from someone

who is greater than anything and I just don't feel it.

Love and Hope,

Ruth

>

> First of all, I'm not trying to be mean here, but people don't go

to hell for killing themselves. My father killed himself and I'm

pretty sure he isn't in hell, pool and more