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Re: Under Control

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Great post. In the book I'm currently reading, When Women Stop

Hating Their Bodies, this woman related a story of when she was

little, she said to her mom, " Mom, I feel I have a great power

within me and I see you have it too, but I don't see you using it. "

Her mother replies, " Oh honey, you'll learn to tone that down once

you start interacting with men. " I think it's so true, we have great

power within all of us, imagine what we can accomplish if we didnt

think about food and our weight.

>

> Hi everyone.

>

> Okay, one of the other posts used the phrase " unless I have

> something to keep me under control " or something like that.

>

> I had a HUGE flash of insight relating to that.

>

> Many other countries use various method to oppress women. " Female

> circumcision " is one. Marrying females off as teenagers is

another.

> Clothing and religious customs... I always thought, " Wow. Isn't it

> great that we do that. "

>

> But... what if all this " diet mentality " is another way to keep

> women (mostly) " under control? " We are so focused on what we eat,

> what we don't eat, are we fat, are we thin enough, how do we

look...

> that we never go beyond appearances.

>

> Now, I'm not suggesting that there is some council of white guys

> somewhere promoting diets so that women will never have power.

>

> But... maybe we as a world and as individuals are so afraid of our

> REAL power that we " control it " by focusing so intensely on

dieting

> and weight.

>

> What would happen if we all realized that we are more than our

> bodies? We are equally as awesome at 275 pounds as we are at 105.

>

> It's scary to release control over our eating because we might

just

> find out that we have more power than we think we do...

>

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What's bad is that we are doing it to ourselves. While it's true that

men are very visual when it comes to being attracted to women, most of

them really aren't attracted the uber-thin girls who look like they

haven't even hit puberty. But, that's the image of beauty that we're

given in magazines and stuff.

Take a look at beer commercials shown during football games. The women

in those commercials are nowhere near as scrawny as the women in

fashion magazines. Most men don't read fashion magazines, but they do

watch football. So, it's only women telling other women that they have

to be ultra-thin to be attractive. Men apparently like curves.

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I agree totally. We perpetuate this problem for our own

gender...especially women in certain western cultures. Mothers,

grandmas, aunts, and other female relatives are so great at pressuring

women to find a man so that she can find happiness. By associating

your success as a women with the ability to attract a man, we

perpetuate the problem. We make it even worse by trying to make looks

the defining way to accomplish that. We don't have to attract a man

to be happy and certainly attracting a man who only cares about your

looks won't!

>

> What's bad is that we are doing it to ourselves. While it's true that

> men are very visual when it comes to being attracted to women, most of

> them really aren't attracted the uber-thin girls who look like they

> haven't even hit puberty. But, that's the image of beauty that we're

> given in magazines and stuff.

>

> Take a look at beer commercials shown during football games. The women

> in those commercials are nowhere near as scrawny as the women in

> fashion magazines. Most men don't read fashion magazines, but they do

> watch football. So, it's only women telling other women that they have

> to be ultra-thin to be attractive. Men apparently like curves.

>

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I agree totally. We perpetuate this problem for our own

gender...especially women in certain western cultures. Mothers,

grandmas, aunts, and other female relatives are so great at pressuring

women to find a man so that she can find happiness. By associating

your success as a women with the ability to attract a man, we

perpetuate the problem. We make it even worse by trying to make looks

the defining way to accomplish that. We don't have to attract a man

to be happy and certainly attracting a man who only cares about your

looks won't!

>

> What's bad is that we are doing it to ourselves. While it's true that

> men are very visual when it comes to being attracted to women, most of

> them really aren't attracted the uber-thin girls who look like they

> haven't even hit puberty. But, that's the image of beauty that we're

> given in magazines and stuff.

>

> Take a look at beer commercials shown during football games. The women

> in those commercials are nowhere near as scrawny as the women in

> fashion magazines. Most men don't read fashion magazines, but they do

> watch football. So, it's only women telling other women that they have

> to be ultra-thin to be attractive. Men apparently like curves.

>

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I agree wholeheartedly and enthusiastically! I just broke up with

someone and at first I of course wanted to diet my way back to a man

attracting size. Luckily I have come to my senses and realized I

don't actually need a boyfriend. I'm doing just fine by myself and if

freezing myself from diets forever means I spend forever with my cats

then so be it.

> >

> > What's bad is that we are doing it to ourselves. While it's true

that

> > men are very visual when it comes to being attracted to women,

most of

> > them really aren't attracted the uber-thin girls who look like

they

> > haven't even hit puberty. But, that's the image of beauty that

we're

> > given in magazines and stuff.

> >

> > Take a look at beer commercials shown during football games. The

women

> > in those commercials are nowhere near as scrawny as the women in

> > fashion magazines. Most men don't read fashion magazines, but

they do

> > watch football. So, it's only women telling other women that

they have

> > to be ultra-thin to be attractive. Men apparently like curves.

> >

>

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How many women were put on their first diets by their mothers as

children? I know women who are so afraid that their daughters will

be fat that they start controlling how much and what they eat when

they're 5 or 6 years old. I knew a woman who was morbidly obese who

told me that her mother put her on a diet when she was 11 MONTHS

old!

Once these girls reach their teens, then they and their friends start

sharing diet " secrets " like purging.

Unfortunately, the whole body image thing is starting to affect men

and boys too. My 11 year old son worries about getting fat. He and

his friends have compared their weights. Boys in high school are

under pressure to be muscular, so they take steroids and

supplements. And, men are getting almost as much plastic surgery as

women.

It sucks.

> >

> > What's bad is that we are doing it to ourselves. While it's true

that

> > men are very visual when it comes to being attracted to women,

most of

> > them really aren't attracted the uber-thin girls who look like

they

> > haven't even hit puberty. But, that's the image of beauty that

we're

> > given in magazines and stuff.

> >

> > Take a look at beer commercials shown during football games. The

women

> > in those commercials are nowhere near as scrawny as the women in

> > fashion magazines. Most men don't read fashion magazines, but

they do

> > watch football. So, it's only women telling other women that

they have

> > to be ultra-thin to be attractive. Men apparently like curves.

> >

>

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He, don't knock cats! I've broken up w/my bf 2 years ago, and now I have 2 cats. Let's see... I'm sorry, cats win!!! okay okay that might depend on the bf mine was a a**hole. Sylvie

I agree wholeheartedly and enthusiastically! I just broke up with

someone and at first I of course wanted to diet my way back to a man

attracting size. Luckily I have come to my senses and realized I

don't actually need a boyfriend. I'm doing just fine by myself and if

freezing myself from diets forever means I spend forever with my cats

then so be it.

> >

> > What's bad is that we are doing it to ourselves. While it's true

that

> > men are very visual when it comes to being attracted to women,

most of

> > them really aren't attracted the uber-thin girls who look like

they

> > haven't even hit puberty. But, that's the image of beauty that

we're

> > given in magazines and stuff.

> >

> > Take a look at beer commercials shown during football games. The

women

> > in those commercials are nowhere near as scrawny as the women in

> > fashion magazines. Most men don't read fashion magazines, but

they do

> > watch football. So, it's only women telling other women that

they have

> > to be ultra-thin to be attractive. Men apparently like curves.

> >

>

-- Sylvie... working on it!Don't believe your mind, it will lie to you!

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Lol. I've had many **hole bf's. I've posted before how a couple of years ago I

went on a

crazy crash diet and lost a lot of weight (people told me I was too skinny, I

was very

unhealthy). That was all because of an **hole bf. Why do we let men treat us

this way?

Yes, cats win hands down. They like to lay on my squishy belly rather than

criticize me

about it. The guy I broke up with wasn't a jerk, it just didn't work out. But

I'm definately

glad the cats are here for me.

> > > >

> > > > What's bad is that we are doing it to ourselves. While it's true

> > that

> > > > men are very visual when it comes to being attracted to women,

> > most of

> > > > them really aren't attracted the uber-thin girls who look like

> > they

> > > > haven't even hit puberty. But, that's the image of beauty that

> > we're

> > > > given in magazines and stuff.

> > > >

> > > > Take a look at beer commercials shown during football games. The

> > women

> > > > in those commercials are nowhere near as scrawny as the women in

> > > > fashion magazines. Most men don't read fashion magazines, but

> > they do

> > > > watch football. So, it's only women telling other women that

> > they have

> > > > to be ultra-thin to be attractive. Men apparently like curves.

> > > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>

> --

> Sylvie... working on it!

>

> Don't believe your mind, it will lie to you!

>

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