Re: Fear of gaining weight

[Guest guest]

i know what you mean--to a certain extent. i have about 43 lbs to lose, i stopped dieting about three years ago, but i didn't know about the "diet mentality" issue until i came across IE about five/six weeks ago. i have been following the EI approach to eating for about a month now and so far so good. but initially i was afraid because eating whatever i wanted when i wanted meant that i would totally overeat everything in sight every time i ate. but that's not what i have experienced. of course, i overeat here and there but not every single time i eat. also, by listening to my stomach and stopping when i'm comfortably full regardless of what i'm eating and where, i'm learning to trust myself all over again when it comes to food--and that's a HUGE DEAL for me. that's why i was afraid to begin with because i didn't trust myself not to overeat. i know that trusting myself will get stronger over time as i honor my body--eat what i want when i'm hungry and stop when i'm comfortably full. it sounds so simple--but we all know it's not so simple all the time. but the fact that i'm working on trusting myself, doesn't mean everything is going perfectly. my clothes are actually feeling tighter than before i started following IE --but i expected that to happen a bit because of what i call the "honeymoon" effect with food. what i mean is that i'm finally truly giving myself permission to eat

whatever i want when i'm hungry; and let's face it, that's a HUGE PARADIGM SHIFT for all

of us. of course, i have eaten foods that i don't eat often but i wanted to eat them because i couldn't before. so in a way, i'm rediscovering all the foods i truly like and enjoy and that satisfy me at the same time--hence the honeymoon effect. it is not a small thing to do!!! so if in order to trust myself with food again means gaining a few pounds by following the IE process, so be it. i feel that's a small price to pay for me.i know what my weight was before i started the IE approach, but since i got rid of my scale i don't know what the number on it would be now nor do i really care to know--but this is where i truly need to trust myself in the whole IE process: if am consistent and patient with myself, my body will stabilize. after all what's the alternative?? to go back to yo-yo dieting by depriving myself? i won't go back to that--i feel i have hurt my body enough through dieting over the last 20 years and that's no longer an option for me.just remember that even if you start to gain a bit of weight, it doesn't mean you will be gaining all 150 lbs over night--that just would not happen. you will be able to adjust your eating and decisions about eating at every meal. i know trusting ourselves with food is very difficult but we have to start some place, and for me that meant the EI approach to eating since diet never worked for me. i'm not trying to convince you one way or another, i'm just sharing with you what i went through and what my experience has been so far. we all have to find what works for us--after all, we are all very unique!good luck in deciding what to do--follow your heart and listen to your body!!Cecilia >> I've been thinking about my eating and why I keep turning to food, and what> keeps me from IE. So, today I'm trying to eat what I want when I want it and> stop when I'm full. I've ran accross a big hurdle that almost sent me back.> I'm afraid, terrified in fact, of gaining weight. I'm at a healthy weight> right now, give or take 20 pounds, and don't want to get back to where I> was. I lost about 150 pounds with weight loss surgery and my life changed.> Not that losing all that weight fixed my life, but a few things got easier.> The compulsive overeating was not cured by the weight loss or the surgery> and I am struggeling more than ever.> > So to get back to the subject of my post, I am soooo afraid to gain weight> with IE that I'm restricting almost unconsciously what I can/cannot eat. And> today I've had to prove to myself that I could eat what I felt like and not> follow those "rules" I made for myself.> > I'm stuck though, I don't know how to change that fear of gaining weight, in> fact I haven't weighted myself since the 1st of March '06, so I'm not sure> how much I weight, I go by a pair of jeans that are kind of tight, as long> as they fit, I know I'm okay.> > How can I change that fear? Any one worked on this before?> > -- > Sylvie... working on it!>

[Guest guest]

i know what you mean--to a certain extent. i have about 43 lbs to lose, i stopped dieting about three years ago, but i didn't know about the "diet mentality" issue until i came across IE about five/six weeks ago. i have been following the EI approach to eating for about a month now and so far so good. but initially i was afraid because eating whatever i wanted when i wanted meant that i would totally overeat everything in sight every time i ate. but that's not what i have experienced. of course, i overeat here and there but not every single time i eat. also, by listening to my stomach and stopping when i'm comfortably full regardless of what i'm eating and where, i'm learning to trust myself all over again when it comes to food--and that's a HUGE DEAL for me. that's why i was afraid to begin with because i didn't trust myself not to overeat. i know that trusting myself will get stronger over time as i honor my body--eat what i want when i'm hungry and stop when i'm comfortably full. it sounds so simple--but we all know it's not so simple all the time. but the fact that i'm working on trusting myself, doesn't mean everything is going perfectly. my clothes are actually feeling tighter than before i started following IE --but i expected that to happen a bit because of what i call the "honeymoon" effect with food. what i mean is that i'm finally truly giving myself permission to eat

whatever i want when i'm hungry; and let's face it, that's a HUGE PARADIGM SHIFT for all

of us. of course, i have eaten foods that i don't eat often but i wanted to eat them because i couldn't before. so in a way, i'm rediscovering all the foods i truly like and enjoy and that satisfy me at the same time--hence the honeymoon effect. it is not a small thing to do!!! so if in order to trust myself with food again means gaining a few pounds by following the IE process, so be it. i feel that's a small price to pay for me.i know what my weight was before i started the IE approach, but since i got rid of my scale i don't know what the number on it would be now nor do i really care to know--but this is where i truly need to trust myself in the whole IE process: if am consistent and patient with myself, my body will stabilize. after all what's the alternative?? to go back to yo-yo dieting by depriving myself? i won't go back to that--i feel i have hurt my body enough through dieting over the last 20 years and that's no longer an option for me.just remember that even if you start to gain a bit of weight, it doesn't mean you will be gaining all 150 lbs over night--that just would not happen. you will be able to adjust your eating and decisions about eating at every meal. i know trusting ourselves with food is very difficult but we have to start some place, and for me that meant the EI approach to eating since diet never worked for me. i'm not trying to convince you one way or another, i'm just sharing with you what i went through and what my experience has been so far. we all have to find what works for us--after all, we are all very unique!good luck in deciding what to do--follow your heart and listen to your body!!Cecilia >> I've been thinking about my eating and why I keep turning to food, and what> keeps me from IE. So, today I'm trying to eat what I want when I want it and> stop when I'm full. I've ran accross a big hurdle that almost sent me back.> I'm afraid, terrified in fact, of gaining weight. I'm at a healthy weight> right now, give or take 20 pounds, and don't want to get back to where I> was. I lost about 150 pounds with weight loss surgery and my life changed.> Not that losing all that weight fixed my life, but a few things got easier.> The compulsive overeating was not cured by the weight loss or the surgery> and I am struggeling more than ever.> > So to get back to the subject of my post, I am soooo afraid to gain weight> with IE that I'm restricting almost unconsciously what I can/cannot eat. And> today I've had to prove to myself that I could eat what I felt like and not> follow those "rules" I made for myself.> > I'm stuck though, I don't know how to change that fear of gaining weight, in> fact I haven't weighted myself since the 1st of March '06, so I'm not sure> how much I weight, I go by a pair of jeans that are kind of tight, as long> as they fit, I know I'm okay.> > How can I change that fear? Any one worked on this before?> > -- > Sylvie... working on it!>

[Guest guest]

Ooh, I know what you are talking about. This has been the hardest

holiday for me in three years. I don't want to go back to the way I

used to be. I like being able to move around and fit into a chair

with arms. I like being able to get down on my knees and clean the

floor and I especially like being able to play with my

granddaughter.

I hate the fact that food holds so much appeal to me that I find

myself putting it in my mouth when I am not hungry and stuffing more

in when I should be satisfied. Why do these goodies have so much

appeal? Why after three years and almost 200 pounds lost do I find

myself having these conflicts?

I believe that once an addict always an addict. I guess I will

have to live with these emotions for ever.

I still believe in myself and that I can continue on my IE

lifestyle when the stress lets up and everything calms down and the

holiday goodies are G O N E!

Thanks for letting me rant.

Peace to all who live as I do.

Vicki

>

> I've been thinking about my eating and why I keep turning to food,

and what

> keeps me from IE. So, today I'm trying to eat what I want when I

want it and

> stop when I'm full. I've ran accross a big hurdle that almost sent

me back.

> I'm afraid, terrified in fact, of gaining weight. I'm at a healthy

weight

> right now, give or take 20 pounds, and don't want to get back to

where I

> was. I lost about 150 pounds with weight loss surgery and my life

changed.

> Not that losing all that weight fixed my life, but a few things

got easier.

> The compulsive overeating was not cured by the weight loss or the

surgery

> and I am struggeling more than ever.

>

> So to get back to the subject of my post, I am soooo afraid to

gain weight

> with IE that I'm restricting almost unconsciously what I

can/cannot eat. And

> today I've had to prove to myself that I could eat what I felt

like and not

> follow those " rules " I made for myself.

>

> I'm stuck though, I don't know how to change that fear of gaining

weight, in

> fact I haven't weighted myself since the 1st of March '06, so I'm

not sure

> how much I weight, I go by a pair of jeans that are kind of tight,

as long

> as they fit, I know I'm okay.

>

> How can I change that fear? Any one worked on this before?

>

> --

> Sylvie... working on it!

>

[Guest guest]

Ooh, I know what you are talking about. This has been the hardest

holiday for me in three years. I don't want to go back to the way I

used to be. I like being able to move around and fit into a chair

with arms. I like being able to get down on my knees and clean the

floor and I especially like being able to play with my

granddaughter.

I hate the fact that food holds so much appeal to me that I find

myself putting it in my mouth when I am not hungry and stuffing more

in when I should be satisfied. Why do these goodies have so much

appeal? Why after three years and almost 200 pounds lost do I find

myself having these conflicts?

I believe that once an addict always an addict. I guess I will

have to live with these emotions for ever.

I still believe in myself and that I can continue on my IE

lifestyle when the stress lets up and everything calms down and the

holiday goodies are G O N E!

Thanks for letting me rant.

Peace to all who live as I do.

Vicki

>

> I've been thinking about my eating and why I keep turning to food,

and what

> keeps me from IE. So, today I'm trying to eat what I want when I

want it and

> stop when I'm full. I've ran accross a big hurdle that almost sent

me back.

> I'm afraid, terrified in fact, of gaining weight. I'm at a healthy

weight

> right now, give or take 20 pounds, and don't want to get back to

where I

> was. I lost about 150 pounds with weight loss surgery and my life

changed.

> Not that losing all that weight fixed my life, but a few things

got easier.

> The compulsive overeating was not cured by the weight loss or the

surgery

> and I am struggeling more than ever.

>

> So to get back to the subject of my post, I am soooo afraid to

gain weight

> with IE that I'm restricting almost unconsciously what I

can/cannot eat. And

> today I've had to prove to myself that I could eat what I felt

like and not

> follow those " rules " I made for myself.

>

> I'm stuck though, I don't know how to change that fear of gaining

weight, in

> fact I haven't weighted myself since the 1st of March '06, so I'm

not sure

> how much I weight, I go by a pair of jeans that are kind of tight,

as long

> as they fit, I know I'm okay.

>

> How can I change that fear? Any one worked on this before?

>

> --

> Sylvie... working on it!

>

[Guest guest]

Ooh, I know what you are talking about. This has been the hardest

holiday for me in three years. I don't want to go back to the way I

used to be. I like being able to move around and fit into a chair

with arms. I like being able to get down on my knees and clean the

floor and I especially like being able to play with my

granddaughter.

I hate the fact that food holds so much appeal to me that I find

myself putting it in my mouth when I am not hungry and stuffing more

in when I should be satisfied. Why do these goodies have so much

appeal? Why after three years and almost 200 pounds lost do I find

myself having these conflicts?

I believe that once an addict always an addict. I guess I will

have to live with these emotions for ever.

I still believe in myself and that I can continue on my IE

lifestyle when the stress lets up and everything calms down and the

holiday goodies are G O N E!

Thanks for letting me rant.

Peace to all who live as I do.

Vicki

>

> I've been thinking about my eating and why I keep turning to food,

and what

> keeps me from IE. So, today I'm trying to eat what I want when I

want it and

> stop when I'm full. I've ran accross a big hurdle that almost sent

me back.

> I'm afraid, terrified in fact, of gaining weight. I'm at a healthy

weight

> right now, give or take 20 pounds, and don't want to get back to

where I

> was. I lost about 150 pounds with weight loss surgery and my life

changed.

> Not that losing all that weight fixed my life, but a few things

got easier.

> The compulsive overeating was not cured by the weight loss or the

surgery

> and I am struggeling more than ever.

>

> So to get back to the subject of my post, I am soooo afraid to

gain weight

> with IE that I'm restricting almost unconsciously what I

can/cannot eat. And

> today I've had to prove to myself that I could eat what I felt

like and not

> follow those " rules " I made for myself.

>

> I'm stuck though, I don't know how to change that fear of gaining

weight, in

> fact I haven't weighted myself since the 1st of March '06, so I'm

not sure

> how much I weight, I go by a pair of jeans that are kind of tight,

as long

> as they fit, I know I'm okay.

>

> How can I change that fear? Any one worked on this before?

>

> --

> Sylvie... working on it!

>

[Guest guest]

Maybe, Vicki, it's because you still say things like:

<< " I believe that once an adict always an addict. I guess I will have

to live with these emotions for ever. " >>

If you changed your thinking to " I *CAN* change these emotions! I

*CAN* get over this addiction to goodies! " .... maybe that would make a

difference? I've read it in TONS of books that thinking one thing will

make your actions follow. So, if you THINK you're addicted to

sweets/goodies, your ACTIONS will prove that to be true. But, if you

practice thinking that you're NOT, then your actions will eventually

follow.... make sense?

(Mind you, I'm speaking hypocritically here... I really have to learn

to put this into practice into my OWN life!... But, it's something

I've read about, so I thought I'd share). :-?

Jenn

<><

Why after three years and almost 200 pounds lost do I find

> myself having these conflicts?

> I believe that once an addict always an addict. I guess I will

> have to live with these emotions for ever.

> I still believe in myself and that I can continue on my IE

> lifestyle when the stress lets up and everything calms down and the

> holiday goodies are G O N E!

[Guest guest]

Maybe, Vicki, it's because you still say things like:

<< " I believe that once an adict always an addict. I guess I will have

to live with these emotions for ever. " >>

If you changed your thinking to " I *CAN* change these emotions! I

*CAN* get over this addiction to goodies! " .... maybe that would make a

difference? I've read it in TONS of books that thinking one thing will

make your actions follow. So, if you THINK you're addicted to

sweets/goodies, your ACTIONS will prove that to be true. But, if you

practice thinking that you're NOT, then your actions will eventually

follow.... make sense?

(Mind you, I'm speaking hypocritically here... I really have to learn

to put this into practice into my OWN life!... But, it's something

I've read about, so I thought I'd share). :-?

Jenn

<><

Why after three years and almost 200 pounds lost do I find

> myself having these conflicts?

> I believe that once an addict always an addict. I guess I will

> have to live with these emotions for ever.

> I still believe in myself and that I can continue on my IE

> lifestyle when the stress lets up and everything calms down and the

> holiday goodies are G O N E!

[Guest guest]

This is the first big meal that I have felt realatively little

temptaion. I felt great all day and wan't very hungry after preparing

dinner for 14 with turkey and all the fixings. I was a little tired

and then fixed myself a glass of iced tea and felt great the rest of

the day. I felt like I will stick to this. I was so encouraged for a

change. This is one thing I like about IE. When you allow all foods,

those tempatations lose their appeal. All these sweets sittng around

look awful to me because I had not denied myself a few tastes.

..

>

> Ooh, I know what you are talking about. This has been the hardest

> holiday for me in three years. I don't want to go back to the way I

> used to be. I like being able to move around and fit into a chair

> with arms. I like being able to get down on my knees and clean the

> floor and I especially like being able to play with my

> granddaughter.

>