Re: legalizing = overeating:( Help please!!

[Guest guest]

Tasha,

I think that as long as you are active and do some form of excersise, you will be fine.

I use excersise as my equalizer or balance in all this. It is not a diet mentality to do so because I do it for overall good health. That means mental, physical and spiritual. For me excersise is as integral to my day as brushing my teeth, changing my underwear and taking a shower. It is just a part of my life now.

So if you are truly worried increase your activity level whether it is walking farther to your car, working out like I do or whatever it is that you like, but I do think that we do not so much overeat most the time as we are just under active in our lifestyles (in this day and age)

And for me, its about eating what satisfies me. Be that gingerbread cookies, a carrot or pasta.

Hope that helps

lynn

Well, I've truly given myself permission to eat and don't hear the food police much but by the end of the night I am miserable. I feel so bloated (and trust me...you can really see it) and yucky that I second guess IE and have such an urge to starve myself again. I have vowed to stick with it and I'm not weighing but I have to say that this sucks! I guess I probably eat a little less each day...but not by much. Did any of you experience this? Please tell me it will even out without me gaining tons in the process. How long did it take you to get over the legalizing food part and just truly honor your hunger instead of eating all of this legalized food at once? Any imput would be so appreciated! I really don't want to fall of track here. HELP!

-- ..

[Guest guest]

Hi Tasha. I'm have the same problems as well. I'm so close to going back and closely monitoring what I eat. I'm trying to make peace with food but all it seems like it's doing is making me miserable and fat. Argh. I'm desperately trying to not weigh myself as well. All I'm eating is crap. I don't even feel like eating anything healthy, only sugary food. I'm hoping this will end soon. I feel like I can't stop bingeing. If you find any helpful advice please let me know. I'm going to try not to stop IE but I have not made peace with food yet and I'm wondering if I ever will. Also, I don't understand the whole making peace with food process. Should I keep my favorite pumpkin squares with cream cheese frosting around. I seriously will never just eat one square. It doesn't seem like I can do this...Tasha

wrote: Well, I've truly given myself permission to eat and don't hear the food police much but by the end of the night I am miserable. I feel so bloated (and trust me...you can really see it) and yucky that I second guess IE and have such an urge to starve myself again. I have vowed to stick with it and I'm not weighing but I have to say that this sucks! I guess I probably eat a little less each day...but not by much. Did any of you experience this? Please tell me it will even out without me gaining tons in the process. How long

did it take you to get over the legalizing food part and just truly honor your hunger instead of eating all of this legalized food at once? Any imput would be so appreciated! I really don't want to fall of track here. HELP! Dodge 10502 Iron Point

Circle Reno, NV 89521 702/987-5404 775/544-3355

[Guest guest]

,

Glad to know I'm not alone. I think I actually answered my own question. After

being in

tears last night at bedtime and just feeling miserable and bloated I promised

not to give

up...telling myself that one of these days...any day now...I'm just not going to

feel so

ravenous. Today was that day! I have still eaten what I want (which has

included mostly

sugar still) but I don't desire the quantity that I used to and I'm also finding

myself wanting

protein for the first time. Its 3:30 and I'm usually uncomfortably full at this

point in my

day, but today, I'm not at all. I think the key is to completely trust in the

theory...stick

with it, even when in doubt, and you HAVE to completely legalize everything.

That means

making sure you have tons of those gingerbread thingys around. Trust me,

they'll lose

their appeal. It may take weeks, but they will.

I feel awesome today and I know that Ive finally hit a turning point and it

should get even

easier from here. I know it's hard to completely legalize food when you are

used to being

careful with every bite. Stick with it! Ill be here for support when you need

it. Sounds

like we can really relate to eachother.

I'm going out to dinner tonight and it will be the first time for as long as I

can remember

that I will be excited, not anxious, about deciding what to order. Freedom is

so

refreshing:). I hope you start to feel good about things soon!

[Guest guest]

,

Glad to know I'm not alone. I think I actually answered my own question. After

being in

tears last night at bedtime and just feeling miserable and bloated I promised

not to give

up...telling myself that one of these days...any day now...I'm just not going to

feel so

ravenous. Today was that day! I have still eaten what I want (which has

included mostly

sugar still) but I don't desire the quantity that I used to and I'm also finding

myself wanting

protein for the first time. Its 3:30 and I'm usually uncomfortably full at this

point in my

day, but today, I'm not at all. I think the key is to completely trust in the

theory...stick

with it, even when in doubt, and you HAVE to completely legalize everything.

That means

making sure you have tons of those gingerbread thingys around. Trust me,

they'll lose

their appeal. It may take weeks, but they will.

I feel awesome today and I know that Ive finally hit a turning point and it

should get even

easier from here. I know it's hard to completely legalize food when you are

used to being

careful with every bite. Stick with it! Ill be here for support when you need

it. Sounds

like we can really relate to eachother.

I'm going out to dinner tonight and it will be the first time for as long as I

can remember

that I will be excited, not anxious, about deciding what to order. Freedom is

so

refreshing:). I hope you start to feel good about things soon!

[Guest guest]

,

Glad to know I'm not alone. I think I actually answered my own question. After

being in

tears last night at bedtime and just feeling miserable and bloated I promised

not to give

up...telling myself that one of these days...any day now...I'm just not going to

feel so

ravenous. Today was that day! I have still eaten what I want (which has

included mostly

sugar still) but I don't desire the quantity that I used to and I'm also finding

myself wanting

protein for the first time. Its 3:30 and I'm usually uncomfortably full at this

point in my

day, but today, I'm not at all. I think the key is to completely trust in the

theory...stick

with it, even when in doubt, and you HAVE to completely legalize everything.

That means

making sure you have tons of those gingerbread thingys around. Trust me,

they'll lose

their appeal. It may take weeks, but they will.

I feel awesome today and I know that Ive finally hit a turning point and it

should get even

easier from here. I know it's hard to completely legalize food when you are

used to being

careful with every bite. Stick with it! Ill be here for support when you need

it. Sounds

like we can really relate to eachother.

I'm going out to dinner tonight and it will be the first time for as long as I

can remember

that I will be excited, not anxious, about deciding what to order. Freedom is

so

refreshing:). I hope you start to feel good about things soon!

[Guest guest]

,

Thanks for the advice. I'm feeling lots better today...not nearly as ravenous

and wanting

something besides sugar for the first time. Definitely progress!

I'm with you on the exercise thing! Before today I have felt so bloated and

sick that I

couldn't have done anything without it making me sick to my stomach. Now that

I'm

feeling a little better, I'm back to Bikram yoga tomorrow and all next week and

I'll be

hitting the cardio again too. The challenge for me will be my motivation for

exercise.

Luckily, like you, Iove to exercise just because it makes me feel good, so

hopefully Ill focus

on that, rather than calories burned.

Thanks again for your reply!

[Guest guest]

From one to another:

Hang in there. We are all here because IE is hard. We've got 90% of

society wagging its finger at us, telling us no, no, no -- and as

loud as that is, it doesn't even begin to match up with the voice in

our heads screaming no, no, no.

Can I offer a few suggestions? I have been thinking about your post

all morning......

You say that food is making you miserable and fat. Yes, that is

true. Food is making you miserable and fat right now, isn't it? But

does it always have to be so? I'm sure you know this, but food is

just a tool. You can use a hammer to destroy a chair or to build a

chair, but the hammer is neither good nor bad. Food is like a

hammer, n'est ce pas?

So a few things here:

1) Cause and effect could be getting mixed up. I thought that

all my food problems would go away when I got skinny. Then I got

skinny. And my food problems got much much worse. I had linked up my

food problems to the wrong thing. So think about that..... food

might not be the real problem --- it might be a proxy for something

else.

2) It is your birthright to feel well-fed and content.

3) It may be that you've linked pumpkin squares with cream cheese

frosting to feeling well-fed and content. Now that you're eating a

lot of them -- you're finding out that that's not true. So is it

that you're just not eating enough pumpkin squares? :-) Try it! But

I hear in your post that you know that that isn't it either.

3) Don't give up yet! Think of how much you're learning. Really! Ok.

Unlimited pumpkin squares isn't going to do it. What will? Well,

what do you like? Maybe a nice steak dinner: a juicy piece of meat,

a baked potato with sour cream and butter, and a big pile of

buttered green beans? Could you fill up on that? What if you ate

steak and potatoes and green beans until you were full, *then* had a

pumpkin square? Would you eat the whole 9x13 pan, or would you be

able to stop?

I don't know you, and I don't know your story -- so I hope I'm not

being presumptuous. I'm still learning, too, or I wouldn't be here.

But I just thought you needed a little cheerleading. I need it too.

I'm glad there's a place where we can get it. And in this process,

it is as important to learn what *doesn't* work as it is to learn

what does. I think you're getting some really valuable insight.

Don't stop now! :-)

PS - It is my personal experience that bingeing is ALWAYS a result

of being underfed and/or undernourished. Always.

>

> Hi Tasha.

> I'm have the same problems as well. I'm so close to going back

and closely monitoring what I eat. I'm trying to make peace with

food but all it seems like it's doing is making me miserable and

fat. Argh. I'm desperately trying to not weigh myself as well.

All I'm eating is crap. I don't even feel like eating anything

healthy, only sugary food. I'm hoping this will end soon. I feel

like I can't stop bingeing. If you find any helpful advice please

let me know. I'm going to try not to stop IE but I have not made

peace with food yet and I'm wondering if I ever will.

> Also, I don't understand the whole making peace with food

process. Should I keep my favorite pumpkin squares with cream

cheese frosting around. I seriously will never just eat one

square. It doesn't seem like I can do this...

>

[Guest guest]

From one to another:

Hang in there. We are all here because IE is hard. We've got 90% of

society wagging its finger at us, telling us no, no, no -- and as

loud as that is, it doesn't even begin to match up with the voice in

our heads screaming no, no, no.

Can I offer a few suggestions? I have been thinking about your post

all morning......

You say that food is making you miserable and fat. Yes, that is

true. Food is making you miserable and fat right now, isn't it? But

does it always have to be so? I'm sure you know this, but food is

just a tool. You can use a hammer to destroy a chair or to build a

chair, but the hammer is neither good nor bad. Food is like a

hammer, n'est ce pas?

So a few things here:

1) Cause and effect could be getting mixed up. I thought that

all my food problems would go away when I got skinny. Then I got

skinny. And my food problems got much much worse. I had linked up my

food problems to the wrong thing. So think about that..... food

might not be the real problem --- it might be a proxy for something

else.

2) It is your birthright to feel well-fed and content.

3) It may be that you've linked pumpkin squares with cream cheese

frosting to feeling well-fed and content. Now that you're eating a

lot of them -- you're finding out that that's not true. So is it

that you're just not eating enough pumpkin squares? :-) Try it! But

I hear in your post that you know that that isn't it either.

3) Don't give up yet! Think of how much you're learning. Really! Ok.

Unlimited pumpkin squares isn't going to do it. What will? Well,

what do you like? Maybe a nice steak dinner: a juicy piece of meat,

a baked potato with sour cream and butter, and a big pile of

buttered green beans? Could you fill up on that? What if you ate

steak and potatoes and green beans until you were full, *then* had a

pumpkin square? Would you eat the whole 9x13 pan, or would you be

able to stop?

I don't know you, and I don't know your story -- so I hope I'm not

being presumptuous. I'm still learning, too, or I wouldn't be here.

But I just thought you needed a little cheerleading. I need it too.

I'm glad there's a place where we can get it. And in this process,

it is as important to learn what *doesn't* work as it is to learn

what does. I think you're getting some really valuable insight.

Don't stop now! :-)

PS - It is my personal experience that bingeing is ALWAYS a result

of being underfed and/or undernourished. Always.

>

> Hi Tasha.

> I'm have the same problems as well. I'm so close to going back

and closely monitoring what I eat. I'm trying to make peace with

food but all it seems like it's doing is making me miserable and

fat. Argh. I'm desperately trying to not weigh myself as well.

All I'm eating is crap. I don't even feel like eating anything

healthy, only sugary food. I'm hoping this will end soon. I feel

like I can't stop bingeing. If you find any helpful advice please

let me know. I'm going to try not to stop IE but I have not made

peace with food yet and I'm wondering if I ever will.

> Also, I don't understand the whole making peace with food

process. Should I keep my favorite pumpkin squares with cream

cheese frosting around. I seriously will never just eat one

square. It doesn't seem like I can do this...

>

[Guest guest]

From one to another:

Hang in there. We are all here because IE is hard. We've got 90% of

society wagging its finger at us, telling us no, no, no -- and as

loud as that is, it doesn't even begin to match up with the voice in

our heads screaming no, no, no.

Can I offer a few suggestions? I have been thinking about your post

all morning......

You say that food is making you miserable and fat. Yes, that is

true. Food is making you miserable and fat right now, isn't it? But

does it always have to be so? I'm sure you know this, but food is

just a tool. You can use a hammer to destroy a chair or to build a

chair, but the hammer is neither good nor bad. Food is like a

hammer, n'est ce pas?

So a few things here:

1) Cause and effect could be getting mixed up. I thought that

all my food problems would go away when I got skinny. Then I got

skinny. And my food problems got much much worse. I had linked up my

food problems to the wrong thing. So think about that..... food

might not be the real problem --- it might be a proxy for something

else.

2) It is your birthright to feel well-fed and content.

3) It may be that you've linked pumpkin squares with cream cheese

frosting to feeling well-fed and content. Now that you're eating a

lot of them -- you're finding out that that's not true. So is it

that you're just not eating enough pumpkin squares? :-) Try it! But

I hear in your post that you know that that isn't it either.

3) Don't give up yet! Think of how much you're learning. Really! Ok.

Unlimited pumpkin squares isn't going to do it. What will? Well,

what do you like? Maybe a nice steak dinner: a juicy piece of meat,

a baked potato with sour cream and butter, and a big pile of

buttered green beans? Could you fill up on that? What if you ate

steak and potatoes and green beans until you were full, *then* had a

pumpkin square? Would you eat the whole 9x13 pan, or would you be

able to stop?

I don't know you, and I don't know your story -- so I hope I'm not

being presumptuous. I'm still learning, too, or I wouldn't be here.

But I just thought you needed a little cheerleading. I need it too.

I'm glad there's a place where we can get it. And in this process,

it is as important to learn what *doesn't* work as it is to learn

what does. I think you're getting some really valuable insight.

Don't stop now! :-)

PS - It is my personal experience that bingeing is ALWAYS a result

of being underfed and/or undernourished. Always.

>

> Hi Tasha.

> I'm have the same problems as well. I'm so close to going back

and closely monitoring what I eat. I'm trying to make peace with

food but all it seems like it's doing is making me miserable and

fat. Argh. I'm desperately trying to not weigh myself as well.

All I'm eating is crap. I don't even feel like eating anything

healthy, only sugary food. I'm hoping this will end soon. I feel

like I can't stop bingeing. If you find any helpful advice please

let me know. I'm going to try not to stop IE but I have not made

peace with food yet and I'm wondering if I ever will.

> Also, I don't understand the whole making peace with food

process. Should I keep my favorite pumpkin squares with cream

cheese frosting around. I seriously will never just eat one

square. It doesn't seem like I can do this...

>

[Guest guest]

Why are you bloated? From overeating or from the types of food you're

choosing?

>

>Well, I've truly given myself permission to eat and don't hear the food

>police much but by

>the end of the night I am miserable. I feel so bloated (and trust me...you

>can really see it)

>and yucky that I second guess IE and have such an urge to starve myself

>again. I have

>vowed to stick with it and I'm not weighing but I have to say that this

>sucks! I guess I

>probably eat a little less each day...but not by much. Did any of you

>experience this?

>Please tell me it will even out without me gaining tons in the process.

>How long did it

>take you to get over the legalizing food part and just truly honor your

>hunger instead of

>eating all of this legalized food at once? Any imput would be so

>appreciated! I really don't

>want to fall of track here. HELP!

>

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[Guest guest]

There is a difference between legalizing food and tempting yourself. I see

legalizing as not feeling guilty if I go to someone's house and eat dessert,

not baking every yummy thing I ever loved and having lots of it around. Of

course if you're surrounded by junk food, you're going to eat some of it.

Legalizing food is giving yourself permission to eat, but it doesn't mean

you HAVE to eat. Does that make sense?

Also -- again, I hate to sound harsh, but as long as you see food as having

some sort of hold over you, it will have a hold over you. Of course you can

eat just one square. No one but you decides what and when you'll eat, right?

Eat one, enjoy it, and tell yourself you can eat one again whenever you

want. Do you believe it? Believing it is the key to IE. What if you ALWAYS

had pumpkin squares around and could eat one whenever you wanted -- as you

probably do with many foods (cereal, milk, bread, fruit...)? Would you still

feel they had some mystique to them? Chocolate doesn't really seem too

exciting to me anymore because we always have m & ms and other chocolate in

the cupboard. Heck, we still have halloween candy in our cupboard. It's

always there and I can eat it whenever I want.

>

Should I keep my favorite pumpkin squares with cream cheese frosting around.

I seriously will never just eat one square. It doesn't seem like I can do

this...

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[Guest guest]

from Barbara Holtzman:

In the chapter on bingeing, she talks about two kinds binges -- food anger

and emotional anger. Food anger is the frustration that builds in reaction

to the deprivation of not letting yourself eat what you want. Either making

certain foods " forbidden " or underfeeding yourself during the day so that

you binge after work or after dinner. Reduce this type of binge by not

letting yourself get too hungry and by allowing yourself to eat what you

really want.

The second type is an attempt to deal with uncomfortable emotional feelings

like anger, sadness, anxiety, boredom, and loneliness. For those of us who

focus on everyone else's needs but our own, eating (particularly sweets) may

be the only way we know how to give to ourselves. For others, it's a means

of procrastination. If you numb yourself with food, you may be trading the

live feelings of anger, sadness and fear for the familiar dull ache of

depression. You also miss the opportunity of learning what your feelings are

trying to tell you.There may be times you experience uncomfortable feelings

and do not use food to cope. Most likely, these feelings are in your

" comfort zone " . We all have a range of both uncomfortable and joyful

feelings we can bear. The parameters of our comfort zones may fluctuate,

depending on our general level of stress, health, where we are in our

menstrual cycle, and how connected and supported we feel by our friends and

family. If you feel the urge to binge, it may be helpful to understand that

it's because something triggered you out of your comfort zone.

>

>PS - It is my personal experience that bingeing is ALWAYS a result

>of being underfed and/or undernourished. Always.

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