Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 , I loved your post. It made me laugh, thanks. I totally see myself in all that you write. Being able to ‘fit’ is so much more happiness than a pint of ice-cream or a whole gigantic candy bar. Sometimes I have to remind myself of those things. Don’t you agree that it is slowing down before we reach for that food and thinking in terms of hunger and satisfaction that we really can be successful? I understand your sadness, because that is how it was with me. It took me over two years to get 170 pounds off, but I can’t be happier. With IE I am more likely to keep it off than someone with the surgery. One of the things that made a difference for me is that I started living, doing the things that made me happy. I got active and got involved. I still have to push myself sometimes, but I don’t want to lose ME again. Vicki From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of Day Sent: Tuesday, November 07, 2006 5:29 AM To: intuitiveeating_support Subject: Life as a fat person Hi All, I watched Oprah yesterday and she had a young lady on the show that had weighed more than 300 lbs. Since the woman's appearance on the show 2 years ago she had lost 170 lbs after doing gastric bypass. After watching this interview I became concious of a few things that I've known but maybe have not been able to articulate previously (even to myself). 1) You ARE treated differently by society if you are overweight. Both Oprah and the guest said this several times. This is another reason it can be so difficult to love ourselves at any size.... we are continually bombarded with messages that we are not enough, that we are not worthy -- not only by the media but in our daily interactions. This is the point that my skinny friend does not get.... she tries to compare carrying 5 extra lbs on her 105 lb body to me being 70 lbs overweight. She just doesn't GET IT and it infuriates me when she tries to make the comparison. At times she gets angry with me when I don't want to squeeze through a row of chairs to get to the front row of at a music production or to walk down main street in our home town because I don't want everyone who knows me to recognize the recent 30 lb weight gain. My anger has continued to fester and I've been on the verge of ending our 10+ year relationship over it. 2) I'm sad that I'm spending my life at this weight. And I'm going to be even more SAD when I look back on any point in time when I did not accept myself and love my body unconditionally. I'm already so SAD that I wasted ONE moment not enjoying this life. There are too many things that I cannot change that make me sad... losing a loved one, a dream, etc... this is something I have some control over and the fear of regretting one more day has jolted me. I've been so afraid to not have that extra bit of food to " top off " my stomach when it gets a wee bit low. But I'm more afraid of wasting a moment of this life... and I just now realized it. I work so hard not to waste my life in other aspects -- my career, my accomplishments... so why not work at not wasting the opportunity for joy? for love? for acceptance? instead of wasting it worrying? not liking myself, etc? 3) Oprah's guest commented for the first 3 months she cried everyday because she missed the food. Food was her best friend and she just couldn't continue the relationship at the same level anymore. I'm breaking up with food... This is my life... and Food isn't going to rob me of it. I'll let my body tell me when to eat instead of the food telling me. Okay... check with me tomorrow to see if I'm buried in a chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and gravy with a chaser of a pint of ice cream... ha! Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 , I loved your post. It made me laugh, thanks. I totally see myself in all that you write. Being able to ‘fit’ is so much more happiness than a pint of ice-cream or a whole gigantic candy bar. Sometimes I have to remind myself of those things. Don’t you agree that it is slowing down before we reach for that food and thinking in terms of hunger and satisfaction that we really can be successful? I understand your sadness, because that is how it was with me. It took me over two years to get 170 pounds off, but I can’t be happier. With IE I am more likely to keep it off than someone with the surgery. One of the things that made a difference for me is that I started living, doing the things that made me happy. I got active and got involved. I still have to push myself sometimes, but I don’t want to lose ME again. Vicki From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of Day Sent: Tuesday, November 07, 2006 5:29 AM To: intuitiveeating_support Subject: Life as a fat person Hi All, I watched Oprah yesterday and she had a young lady on the show that had weighed more than 300 lbs. Since the woman's appearance on the show 2 years ago she had lost 170 lbs after doing gastric bypass. After watching this interview I became concious of a few things that I've known but maybe have not been able to articulate previously (even to myself). 1) You ARE treated differently by society if you are overweight. Both Oprah and the guest said this several times. This is another reason it can be so difficult to love ourselves at any size.... we are continually bombarded with messages that we are not enough, that we are not worthy -- not only by the media but in our daily interactions. This is the point that my skinny friend does not get.... she tries to compare carrying 5 extra lbs on her 105 lb body to me being 70 lbs overweight. She just doesn't GET IT and it infuriates me when she tries to make the comparison. At times she gets angry with me when I don't want to squeeze through a row of chairs to get to the front row of at a music production or to walk down main street in our home town because I don't want everyone who knows me to recognize the recent 30 lb weight gain. My anger has continued to fester and I've been on the verge of ending our 10+ year relationship over it. 2) I'm sad that I'm spending my life at this weight. And I'm going to be even more SAD when I look back on any point in time when I did not accept myself and love my body unconditionally. I'm already so SAD that I wasted ONE moment not enjoying this life. There are too many things that I cannot change that make me sad... losing a loved one, a dream, etc... this is something I have some control over and the fear of regretting one more day has jolted me. I've been so afraid to not have that extra bit of food to " top off " my stomach when it gets a wee bit low. But I'm more afraid of wasting a moment of this life... and I just now realized it. I work so hard not to waste my life in other aspects -- my career, my accomplishments... so why not work at not wasting the opportunity for joy? for love? for acceptance? instead of wasting it worrying? not liking myself, etc? 3) Oprah's guest commented for the first 3 months she cried everyday because she missed the food. Food was her best friend and she just couldn't continue the relationship at the same level anymore. I'm breaking up with food... This is my life... and Food isn't going to rob me of it. I'll let my body tell me when to eat instead of the food telling me. Okay... check with me tomorrow to see if I'm buried in a chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and gravy with a chaser of a pint of ice cream... ha! Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 -- Loved your email... " I'm breaking up with food! " I love that!! Good for you...you can eat that food tomorrow--just bites!! Cheryl > >Date: 2006/11/07 Tue AM 05:28:35 CST >To: intuitiveeating_support >Subject: Life as a fat person > >Hi All, > >I watched Oprah yesterday and she had a young lady on the show that had weighed more than 300 lbs. Since the woman's appearance on the show 2 years ago she had lost 170 lbs after doing gastric bypass. After watching this interview I became concious of a few things that I've known but maybe have not been able to articulate previously (even to myself). > >1) You ARE treated differently by society if you are overweight. Both Oprah and the guest said this several times. This is another reason it can be so difficult to love ourselves at any size.... we are continually bombarded with messages that we are not enough, that we are not worthy -- not only by the media but in our daily interactions. > >This is the point that my skinny friend does not get.... she tries to compare carrying 5 extra lbs on her 105 lb body to me being 70 lbs overweight. She just doesn't GET IT and it infuriates me when she tries to make the comparison. At times she gets angry with me when I don't want to squeeze through a row of chairs to get to the front row of at a music production or to walk down main street in our home town because I don't want everyone who knows me to recognize the recent 30 lb weight gain. My anger has continued to fester and I've been on the verge of ending our 10+ year relationship over it.<br><br>2) I'm sad that I'm spending my life at this weight. And I'm going to be even more SAD when I look back on any point in time when I did not accept myself and love my body unconditionally. I'm already so SAD that I wasted ONE moment not enjoying this life. There are too many things that I cannot change that make me sad... losing a loved one, a dream, etc... this is something I have some control over and the fear of regretting one more day has jolted me. <br><br>I've been so afraid to not have that extra bit of food to " top off " my stomach when it gets a wee bit low. But I'm more afraid of wasting a moment of this life... and I just now realized it. I work so hard not to waste my life in other aspects -- my career, my accomplishments.<wbr>.. so why not work at not wasting the opportunity for joy? for love? for acceptance? instead of wasting it worrying? not liking myself, etc?<br><br>3) Oprah's guest commented for the first 3 months she cried everyday because she missed the food. Food was her best friend and she just couldn't continue the relationship at the same level anymore. <br><br>I'm breaking up with food... This is my life... and Food isn't going to rob me of it. I'll let my body tell me when to eat instead of the food telling me. > >Okay... check with me tomorrow to see if I'm buried in a chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and gravy with a chaser of a pint of ice cream... ha! > > > Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 -- Loved your email... " I'm breaking up with food! " I love that!! Good for you...you can eat that food tomorrow--just bites!! Cheryl > >Date: 2006/11/07 Tue AM 05:28:35 CST >To: intuitiveeating_support >Subject: Life as a fat person > >Hi All, > >I watched Oprah yesterday and she had a young lady on the show that had weighed more than 300 lbs. Since the woman's appearance on the show 2 years ago she had lost 170 lbs after doing gastric bypass. After watching this interview I became concious of a few things that I've known but maybe have not been able to articulate previously (even to myself). > >1) You ARE treated differently by society if you are overweight. Both Oprah and the guest said this several times. This is another reason it can be so difficult to love ourselves at any size.... we are continually bombarded with messages that we are not enough, that we are not worthy -- not only by the media but in our daily interactions. > >This is the point that my skinny friend does not get.... she tries to compare carrying 5 extra lbs on her 105 lb body to me being 70 lbs overweight. She just doesn't GET IT and it infuriates me when she tries to make the comparison. At times she gets angry with me when I don't want to squeeze through a row of chairs to get to the front row of at a music production or to walk down main street in our home town because I don't want everyone who knows me to recognize the recent 30 lb weight gain. My anger has continued to fester and I've been on the verge of ending our 10+ year relationship over it.<br><br>2) I'm sad that I'm spending my life at this weight. And I'm going to be even more SAD when I look back on any point in time when I did not accept myself and love my body unconditionally. I'm already so SAD that I wasted ONE moment not enjoying this life. There are too many things that I cannot change that make me sad... losing a loved one, a dream, etc... this is something I have some control over and the fear of regretting one more day has jolted me. <br><br>I've been so afraid to not have that extra bit of food to " top off " my stomach when it gets a wee bit low. But I'm more afraid of wasting a moment of this life... and I just now realized it. I work so hard not to waste my life in other aspects -- my career, my accomplishments.<wbr>.. so why not work at not wasting the opportunity for joy? for love? for acceptance? instead of wasting it worrying? not liking myself, etc?<br><br>3) Oprah's guest commented for the first 3 months she cried everyday because she missed the food. Food was her best friend and she just couldn't continue the relationship at the same level anymore. <br><br>I'm breaking up with food... This is my life... and Food isn't going to rob me of it. I'll let my body tell me when to eat instead of the food telling me. > >Okay... check with me tomorrow to see if I'm buried in a chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and gravy with a chaser of a pint of ice cream... ha! > > > Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 Hi , I hope this doesn't come off too defensive. In regard to the anger towards your skinny friend, remember that she might be just as tormented and obsessed with food as you. She might spend every minute of the daying worrying and stressing about how much and what to eat. If you can look past the weight numbers (like you would like other people to do to you, I'm sure), you might find that you have more in common that you previously thought. No matter what our sizes are, we will be better off with a healthy intuitive relationship with food. I also tend to believe that we have an easier time acheiving goals (like good health) if we work together instead of trying to emphasize the differences between us. Good friends are so hard to come by. I hope you guys can work it out. Best of luck, Amy > > Hi All, > > I watched Oprah yesterday and she had a young lady on the show that had weighed more than 300 lbs. Since the woman's appearance on the show 2 years ago she had lost 170 lbs after doing gastric bypass. After watching this interview I became concious of a few things that I've known but maybe have not been able to articulate previously (even to myself). > > 1) You ARE treated differently by society if you are overweight. Both Oprah and the guest said this several times. This is another reason it can be so difficult to love ourselves at any size.... we are continually bombarded with messages that we are not enough, that we are not worthy -- not only by the media but in our daily interactions. > > This is the point that my skinny friend does not get.... she tries to compare carrying 5 extra lbs on her 105 lb body to me being 70 lbs overweight. She just doesn't GET IT and it infuriates me when she tries to make the comparison. At times she gets angry with me when I don't want to squeeze through a row of chairs to get to the front row of at a music production or to walk down main street in our home town because I don't want everyone who knows me to recognize the recent 30 lb weight gain. My anger has continued to fester and I've been on the verge of ending our 10+ year relationship over it. > > 2) I'm sad that I'm spending my life at this weight. And I'm going to be even more SAD when I look back on any point in time when I did not accept myself and love my body unconditionally. I'm already so SAD that I wasted ONE moment not enjoying this life. There are too many things that I cannot change that make me sad... losing a loved one, a dream, etc... this is something I have some control over and the fear of regretting one more day has jolted me. > > I've been so afraid to not have that extra bit of food to " top off " my stomach when it gets a wee bit low. But I'm more afraid of wasting a moment of this life... and I just now realized it. I work so hard not to waste my life in other aspects -- my career, my accomplishments... so why not work at not wasting the opportunity for joy? for love? for acceptance? instead of wasting it worrying? not liking myself, etc? > > 3) Oprah's guest commented for the first 3 months she cried everyday because she missed the food. Food was her best friend and she just couldn't continue the relationship at the same level anymore. > > I'm breaking up with food... This is my life... and Food isn't going to rob me of it. I'll let my body tell me when to eat instead of the food telling me. > > Okay... check with me tomorrow to see if I'm buried in a chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and gravy with a chaser of a pint of ice cream... ha! > > > > --------------------------------- > Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 Wow, , those don't sound like very healthy eating habits: eating dessert for a meal, forgetting to eat, and being underweight. To me, it sounds like she has a lot of room for improvement in regard to living healthy. I remember reading in " Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program that works " how one of the author's clients spoke about how she looked up to another one of the author's clients. She wanted to be thin and healthy like other other client. It turned out the other skinny client was battling with well-hidden bulemia. I guess it can be hard to see sometimes. Anyway, thanks so much for the response. This is such a great community forum, and I'm glad to be a part of it. Amy Hi , > > I hope this doesn't come off too defensive. In regard to the anger > towards your skinny friend, remember that she might be just as > tormented and obsessed with food as you. She might spend every > minute of the daying worrying and stressing about how much and what > to eat. If you can look past the weight numbers (like you would > like other people to do to you, I'm sure), you might find that you > have more in common that you previously thought. No matter what our > sizes are, we will be better off with a healthy intuitive > relationship with food. I also tend to believe that we have an > easier time acheiving goals (like good health) if we work together > instead of trying to emphasize the differences between us. > > Good friends are so hard to come by. I hope you guys can work it > out. > > Best of luck, > Amy > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 Yep, you definitely know your friend well. She is lucky to have you as a friend! Have a great day! Amy Wow, , those don't sound like very healthy eating habits: > eating dessert for a meal, forgetting to eat, and being > underweight. To me, it sounds like she has a lot of room for > improvement in regard to living healthy. > > I remember reading in " Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program > that works " how one of the author's clients spoke about how she > looked up to another one of the author's clients. She wanted to be > thin and healthy like other other client. It turned out the other > skinny client was battling with well-hidden bulemia. I guess it can > be hard to see sometimes. > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Check out the all-new Yahoo! Mail - Fire up a more powerful email and get things done faster. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 Yep, you know your friend well. She is lucky to have you! Have a great week! Amy Wow, , those don't sound like very healthy eating habits: > eating dessert for a meal, forgetting to eat, and being > underweight. To me, it sounds like she has a lot of room for > improvement in regard to living healthy. > > I remember reading in " Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program > that works " how one of the author's clients spoke about how she > looked up to another one of the author's clients. She wanted to be > thin and healthy like other other client. It turned out the other > skinny client was battling with well-hidden bulemia. I guess it can > be hard to see sometimes. > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Check out the all-new Yahoo! Mail - Fire up a more powerful email and get things done faster. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 Yep, you know your friend well. She is lucky to have you! Have a great week! Amy Wow, , those don't sound like very healthy eating habits: > eating dessert for a meal, forgetting to eat, and being > underweight. To me, it sounds like she has a lot of room for > improvement in regard to living healthy. > > I remember reading in " Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program > that works " how one of the author's clients spoke about how she > looked up to another one of the author's clients. She wanted to be > thin and healthy like other other client. It turned out the other > skinny client was battling with well-hidden bulemia. I guess it can > be hard to see sometimes. > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Check out the all-new Yahoo! Mail - Fire up a more powerful email and get things done faster. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 7, 2006 Report Share Posted November 7, 2006 Yep, you know your friend well. She is lucky to have you! Have a great week! Amy Wow, , those don't sound like very healthy eating habits: > eating dessert for a meal, forgetting to eat, and being > underweight. To me, it sounds like she has a lot of room for > improvement in regard to living healthy. > > I remember reading in " Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program > that works " how one of the author's clients spoke about how she > looked up to another one of the author's clients. She wanted to be > thin and healthy like other other client. It turned out the other > skinny client was battling with well-hidden bulemia. I guess it can > be hard to see sometimes. > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Check out the all-new Yahoo! Mail - Fire up a more powerful email and get things done faster. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 15, 2006 Report Share Posted November 15, 2006 Isn't Kirstie Alley doing what we aren't supposed to be doing-- dieting restrictively. I think it's great for her to have lost so much weight, but she's done it on JENNY CRAIG, the antithesis of Intuitive Eating. Her weight has gone up and down so many times, I doubt she has a clue about what hunger is and how entrenched she is in the diet mentality. Sorry, it's just something that struck me as I read these posts about her. Sandi > Hi everyone, > > - I really appreciated your post. And about your friend - you're right in that her experience is not the same as yours and the two shouldn't be compared. It's one thing for her to be concerned about 5 lbs, but she should understand that there is a difference between being 5 lbs " overweight " and 70lbs overweight. I would be offended and frustrated in that situation. > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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