Re: Angel's update

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone,

I just thought you would like an update on my RE visit today. To put it in

the readers digest version I have 2 options. I can do INVITRO or ADOPTION.

Since my and I cannot afford either, Neither is an option. Of course my Mom

said she would sell her house but that is another story. Anyway, I am feeling

sort of low and not up to writing too much so I am going to bed. Maybe I will

catch you later.

Angel

[Guest guest]

Angel,

What did the doctor say? When you feel like talking about it, please let me

know. I just can't believe that a diagnosis could be made in one visit! I

am worried about you...

I saw you online, but didn't get the e-mail until you were already gone!

Take care,

Krista

[Guest guest]

Oh, Angel, I'm so sorry! I'm with Krista, though, how can they be so

definitive after one visit? We're here when you want to talk.

Hang in there,

[Guest guest]

Angel,

I'm sorry that you got the diagnosis you did from the RE. My DH and I are

in the same boat...if it comes down to that...we will not be able to afford

either ourselves if we are faced with that choice. You are and will be in

my thoughts and prayers.

Mommy to two angel babies, 7/12/97 and 11/6/98

visit our website at http://members.tripod.com/don_n_bess/memorial.html

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone,

I figured I would give you a little more info. this time. This is the second

time that I have seen this particular RE. He has all of the records my reg.

ob/gyn has. He is the one that suggested I get my insides looked at for

adhesions in the first place. When we got there he said he was not happy what

happened to me at all. The way Mom and I understood it was that both of my

tubes are now damaged. One due to the ectopic the other due to appendectomy.

He talked about those same hairs Sonja had talked about in a previous message

concerning bcp.

Sonja writes: The synthetic hormones basically acts like a 'anesthetic' on

your tubes -- they can actually make the little fimbrea (hair like thingies

in your tubes that moves the fertilized egg to the uterus) numb, almost

paralyzing them,

which is why the egg cannot get to the uterus, and results in an ectopic.

These hairs are also damaged in both tubes. I guess that is why it took me so

long to get pg. because the one was already damaged. I asked if we should be

using bc. He said there really is no point I prob. won't get pg. I asked what

happens if I actually do. He said it would end up the same way as last time.

Now I am terrified of getting pg. My Mom is ready to sue someone's ass off.

She thinks none of this would have happened if they had taken care of my

appendix the day it burst instead of waiting 24 hours for the infection to go

away. She has already called a lawyer. I don't know if that is the right

thing to do but the way she talks we could get enough money to adopt a family

of five if we want it. I guess we will just have to see what the lawyer says

when he gets back to Mom on Mon. I feel terrible because I want to try the

invitro. first, before adopting. I just want to know what it is like to be

pg. just once. I found out that 2 of my coworkers are pg. Now I feel like

quitting my job. How will I be able to handle seeing them grow like I should

have this year? One has only one other child. The other already has three and

her dh isn't too happy about it. I feel ripped off. I feel pretty terrible

about the whole thing. I am sorry this may have depressed some of you but you

wanted to know.

Oh, my brother also suggested getting a second opinion. I could go to 100 dr.

if even one of them said it was OK I would still be worried about what the

first RE said. I will definitely go back to my original dr. to see what he

has to say about the results. Anyway, thanks for listening.

Angel

[Guest guest]

Angel,

I just want you to know that there is ABSOLUTELY NO WAY this doctor can tell

you if the ampulla of a fallopian tube is damaged. Yes, with a history of

pelvic-area infection, there is a possibility. Without a falloscopy, NO

doctor can make this diagnosis.

Get a second opinion, the first RE sounds like an idiot.

Take care,

Krista

[Guest guest]

Dear Angel,

I second what Krista said. Anything else makes no sense!

Take Care,

[Guest guest]

Hi Angel

I am so sorry to hear of your predicament(not the right word I am sure, but

the old mind is not functioning today)Please let me know what happened with

the lawyer. I hope that you will get some answers as to what your options

are for the future.

Take care, and I will be thinking of you.

Sonja

>From: MRSFISH95@...

>Reply-To: ectopicpregnancyegroups

>To: ectopicpregnancyegroups

>Subject: Re: Angel's update

>Date: Sat, 16 Oct 1999 14:13:21 EDT

>

>Hi everyone,

>

>I figured I would give you a little more info. this time. This is the

>second

>time that I have seen this particular RE. He has all of the records my reg.

>ob/gyn has. He is the one that suggested I get my insides looked at for

>adhesions in the first place. When we got there he said he was not happy

>what

>happened to me at all. The way Mom and I understood it was that both of my

>tubes are now damaged. One due to the ectopic the other due to

>appendectomy.

>He talked about those same hairs Sonja had talked about in a previous

>message

>concerning bcp.

>

>Sonja writes: The synthetic hormones basically acts like a 'anesthetic' on

>your tubes -- they can actually make the little fimbrea (hair like thingies

>in your tubes that moves the fertilized egg to the uterus) numb, almost

>paralyzing them,

>which is why the egg cannot get to the uterus, and results in an ectopic.

>

>These hairs are also damaged in both tubes. I guess that is why it took me

>so

>long to get pg. because the one was already damaged. I asked if we should

>be

>using bc. He said there really is no point I prob. won't get pg. I asked

>what

>happens if I actually do. He said it would end up the same way as last

>time.

>Now I am terrified of getting pg. My Mom is ready to sue someone's ass off.

>She thinks none of this would have happened if they had taken care of my

>appendix the day it burst instead of waiting 24 hours for the infection to

>go

>away. She has already called a lawyer. I don't know if that is the right

>thing to do but the way she talks we could get enough money to adopt a

>family

>of five if we want it. I guess we will just have to see what the lawyer

>says

>when he gets back to Mom on Mon. I feel terrible because I want to try the

>invitro. first, before adopting. I just want to know what it is like to be

>pg. just once. I found out that 2 of my coworkers are pg. Now I feel like

>quitting my job. How will I be able to handle seeing them grow like I

>should

>have this year? One has only one other child. The other already has three

>and

>her dh isn't too happy about it. I feel ripped off. I feel pretty terrible

>about the whole thing. I am sorry this may have depressed some of you but

>you

>wanted to know.

>

>Oh, my brother also suggested getting a second opinion. I could go to 100

>dr.

>if even one of them said it was OK I would still be worried about what the

>first RE said. I will definitely go back to my original dr. to see what he

>has to say about the results. Anyway, thanks for listening.

>

>Angel

>

>------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

>eGroups.com home: /group/ectopicpregnancy

> - Simplifying group communications

>

>

>

>

>

______________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Angel

I actually agree with Krista and . After my ectopic, the doctor said

that it may have been caused by damage to the ampulla or fimbrae, so I asked

him if there was any way to check, and he said the only way would be to do a

falloscopy, but even then it would be difficult to say with 100% certainty.

And apparantly the risk of the falloscopy causing some damage to the

fimbrae, could actually outway the benefits, as there might not have been

any damage to start with. (I am sure that this depends on the apt-ness of

the doctor doing the procedure though, as I know alot of woman that have had

this done, with no resulting damage)Anyway, just have it checked out, you

might be pleasantly surprised.

all the best

Sonja

>From: KDJOHIO@...

>Reply-To: ectopicpregnancyegroups

>To: ectopicpregnancyegroups

>Subject: Re: Angel's update

>Date: Sat, 16 Oct 1999 16:37:27 EDT

>

>Dear Angel,

>

>I second what Krista said. Anything else makes no sense!

>

>Take Care,

>

>

>

>------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

>eGroups.com home: /group/ectopicpregnancy

> - Simplifying group communications

>

>

>

>

>

______________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Angel,

I wish I had something useful to say. I think you should pursue seeing a

lawyer. However, remember that it will bring you major stress, whether it

settles or goes to trial. Depositions will be brutal and invasive, but if you

can handle it, more power to you!! I have thought about it myself. Now that I

have met so many others in my situation, I look at the outcome of my surgery and

the way in which I was cut and wonder. But I am not up to the stress of a

lawsuit. Too much going on for me, but I totally believe in holding those

responsible for causing irreperable damage. Keep us posted on this.

I also would probably seek another opinion, although you've had many. It

couldn't hurt. Look for the most reputable in you area and give it another

shot. And even if you can get pg again, that fear will ALWAYS be there - and

it's the same for all of us. If I am even a day late I am taking a hpt. I just

don't want to risk my life again.

About the coworkers being pg, I can sympathize. My dh comes from a family of

13. There is always a baby on the way and never from me (usually the unmarried

siblings reproduce - go figure). One of my many SIL is working on #4. She is

not properly caring for the 3 she has now. She is unmarried, unemployed and the

father is only 19 (she is 25), and he is unemployed - he just got out of high

school for crying out loud! You will never escape pg around you, you'll just

learn how to deal w/ it over time. I used to leave the room if in-laws were

having " baby talk " or the latest grandchild was brought around. Now I stay and

only join in if I feel comfortable. Sorry I can't offer more, hang in there

we're here for you.

Tara

Re: Angel's update

Hi everyone,

I figured I would give you a little more info. this time. This is the second

time that I have seen this particular RE. He has all of the records my reg.

ob/gyn has. He is the one that suggested I get my insides looked at for

adhesions in the first place. When we got there he said he was not happy what

happened to me at all. The way Mom and I understood it was that both of my

tubes are now damaged. One due to the ectopic the other due to appendectomy.

He talked about those same hairs Sonja had talked about in a previous message

concerning bcp.

Sonja writes: The synthetic hormones basically acts like a 'anesthetic' on

your tubes -- they can actually make the little fimbrea (hair like thingies

in your tubes that moves the fertilized egg to the uterus) numb, almost

paralyzing them,

which is why the egg cannot get to the uterus, and results in an ectopic.

These hairs are also damaged in both tubes. I guess that is why it took me so

long to get pg. because the one was already damaged. I asked if we should be

using bc. He said there really is no point I prob. won't get pg. I asked what

happens if I actually do. He said it would end up the same way as last time.

Now I am terrified of getting pg. My Mom is ready to sue someone's ass off.

She thinks none of this would have happened if they had taken care of my

appendix the day it burst instead of waiting 24 hours for the infection to go

away. She has already called a lawyer. I don't know if that is the right

thing to do but the way she talks we could get enough money to adopt a family

of five if we want it. I guess we will just have to see what the lawyer says

when he gets back to Mom on Mon. I feel terrible because I want to try the

invitro. first, before adopting. I just want to know what it is like to be

pg. just once. I found out that 2 of my coworkers are pg. Now I feel like

quitting my job. How will I be able to handle seeing them grow like I should

have this year? One has only one other child. The other already has three and

her dh isn't too happy about it. I feel ripped off. I feel pretty terrible

about the whole thing. I am sorry this may have depressed some of you but you

wanted to know.

Oh, my brother also suggested getting a second opinion. I could go to 100 dr.

if even one of them said it was OK I would still be worried about what the

first RE said. I will definitely go back to my original dr. to see what he

has to say about the results. Anyway, thanks for listening.

Angel

------------------------------------------------------------------------

eGroups.com home: /group/ectopicpregnancy

- Simplifying group communications

[Guest guest]

Tara,

Thanks for understanding.

[Guest guest]

Hey everyone,

Thanks for all the understanding and responses. I did not hear anything

useful from the contacted lawyers. I did call my reg. ob/gyn today. I asked

him if he thought the opinion was correct. He said that he did not realize

that the RE would give me that option but now that he hears it, it makes

sense to him. He thought it would be a good way to go because then I would

not have to be terrified of having another ep. He said it would be the most

direct way to get pg. without future ep. Something to that effect any way. He

said I could prob. get pg. but the chances are higher for ep if we do it the

old fashioned way. I asked him if all of this happened to me because of the

appendectomy. He said it put me at really high risk. I asked him if they had

operated sooner on me would it have come to this. (invitro) He said that less

prob.s occur if the oper. is done before the bursting. I hope this all makes

sense to you. If not let me know. I guess I should feel lucky. This has been

all put into my lap sooner than I thought it would. All I have to do is come

up with the money and then I am home free. I will definitely know when I am

pg. And not have to worry about ep. Right.

I do have a ??? How many of you had successful pg. without help after ep.

let me know

Angel

[Guest guest]

Dear Angel,

My answer to your questions is a bleak one I'm afraid. In August of 1994 I

gave birth to a healthy little girl after a completely perfect pregnancy. I

was never sick a day, I never complained for a minute. After her birth, I

have had an ectopic, a miscarriage, another miscarriage, an ectopic and

another ectopic. Go figure?

Take Care,

[Guest guest]

,

Did you have any pg. before your daughter?

Angel

[Guest guest]

Angel,

No, nothing before my pregnancy with Olivia.

Take Care,

[Guest guest]

I am sorry to hear that. Thanks for the input.

Angel

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 10/18/99 7:52:08 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

MRSFISH95@... writes:

<< I do have a ??? How many of you had successful pg. without help after ep.

>>

Hi, Angel--

I had two successful pregnancies after my first ectopic. With my first

one, though, the tube didn't rupture. It was caught early enough that they

were able to remove the pregnancy and repair the tube (my right). I don't

remember how long it took me to get pregnant after that, but it was less than

a year. I had problems with that pregnancy, but nothing to do with the

ectopic, and I had a healthy boy. And then two years after my son was born,

I had my daughter. But then seven years after that, I had another ectopic in

the same tube! So maybe I was just incredibly lucky, and my fertilized eggs

all traveled down the left tube, or maybe my right tube was okay sometimes

and other times not. This last time it ruptured, so I only have the left

now, and I'm planning on trying again naturally in several months.

[Guest guest]

Sorry, Jan!

RE: Reproductive Endocrinologist!

We need a key for all the symbols!

Hope you are doing okay!

Take care,

Krista

[Guest guest]

Way to go Jan! Would you mind sharing the paper with us, if it is not too

long to type again! I would love to read it!

Take care,

Krista

[Guest guest]

could someone please tell me what an RE is..........

[Guest guest]

I am ok...and I want to thank everybody so much for sharing their stories

with me.....I will let everybody know what mark I got for the presentation

when they are released....

Everybody in the class said that they learnt s much that they did not

allready know....I was trying to get across that women who have had ep's

need to be treated with empathy, compassion and differently from women who

have had miscarriages

[Guest guest]

Angel,

My ep has been my only pg. I plan on ttc in Jan, so hopefully I will have some

good news to report to you. I really think you should consider that 2nd

opinion. Miracles do happen, and you just might be one. I know how you feel

about another ectopic - believe me. My ep resulted in a massive rupture w/ 50%

blood loss. That's 50% of my entire blood supply. They originally were going to

do a nice little cut to repair the damage, but b/c I was bleeding so quickly

they had to do a large vertical incision, remove my tube entirely, intubate me,

transfusions, oxygen, etc. So as far as being afraid of that again, I can

relate. This is the thought that keeps me going. The next time I will know I

am pg and I will begin having my blood drawn to check the Hcg levels right away.

A pg will not get to the point of rupturing. In the nearly 2 years since the

rupture, I have taken a hpt test any time I am a day late, and then repeated the

test the following morning. For me IVF is not presently an option, so I must

have faith. We cannot swing the expense, esp. since I am saving my $ to take a

full year off after I have my baby:)! I hope this helps. I know it's hard and

it has taken me nearly 2 years to get to this point. Good Luck!

Tara

Re: Angel's update

Hey everyone,

Thanks for all the understanding and responses. I did not hear anything

useful from the contacted lawyers. I did call my reg. ob/gyn today. I asked

him if he thought the opinion was correct. He said that he did not realize

that the RE would give me that option but now that he hears it, it makes

sense to him. He thought it would be a good way to go because then I would

not have to be terrified of having another ep. He said it would be the most

direct way to get pg. without future ep. Something to that effect any way. He

said I could prob. get pg. but the chances are higher for ep if we do it the

old fashioned way. I asked him if all of this happened to me because of the

appendectomy. He said it put me at really high risk. I asked him if they had

operated sooner on me would it have come to this. (invitro) He said that less

prob.s occur if the oper. is done before the bursting. I hope this all makes

sense to you. If not let me know. I guess I should feel lucky. This has been

all put into my lap sooner than I thought it would. All I have to do is come

up with the money and then I am home free. I will definitely know when I am

pg. And not have to worry about ep. Right.

I do have a ??? How many of you had successful pg. without help after ep.

let me know

Angel

------------------------------------------------------------------------

eGroups.com home: /group/ectopicpregnancy

- Simplifying group communications

[Guest guest]

Angel:

I have not been able to get pregnant after my ectopic, but I have just found

out that this is because of another problem completely unrelated to the

ectopic. I have a Luteal Phase Defect, which is when the second part of the

cycle (after ovulation) does not progress as it should. This is due to a

lack of progesterone. In all probability, this accounts for the cause of my

first loss, a miscarriage early in pregnancy.

When I had my ectopic, it seemed as though women with one tube came out of

the woodwork to tell me that they had gone on to have numerous pregnancies.

Some of these women lost tubes to ectopic pregnancies. It gave me a lot of

encouragement to know that it was indeed possible to have children with only

one tube, because I sometimes feel like " damaged goods " .

Each case is different. Each doctor is different. I have been trying to

get some test results for a number of days now and could not seem to link up

with my doctor. The office would not allow any other doctor to talk with me

because they are aware that each doctor has his own ideas about what should

be done. My doctor is very conservative, and takes things slowly.

Sometimes this is frustrating, because I want a baby NOW but in the long run

I know he is not going to suggest anything WAY OUT unless it is warranted.

Take Care,

Mommy to two angel babies, 7/12/97 and 11/6/98

visit our website at http://members.tripod.com/don_n_bess/memorial.html

[Guest guest]

Sonja,

I started seeing an RE after my gyn. suggested it. He made the decision after

4 unsuccessful months on Chlomid. (Fert. drug.) I had been trying to conceive

2 yrs. before this. So it was a long over due referral. I would suggest you

ask. You might even call an RE in your area and ask their advice. Some

insurance's do not cover these visits and some require a written referral.

Anyway I hope this has helped.

Angel