Guest guest Posted June 16, 1999 Report Share Posted June 16, 1999 If Religion Dealt With Toys Capitalism -- He who dies with the most toys, wins. Hare Krshna -- He who plays with the most toys, wins. Catholicism -- He who denies himself the most toys, wins. Anglican -- They were our toys first. Greek Orthodox -- No, they were OURS first. Branch ians -- He who dies playing with the biggest toys, wins. Atheism -- There is no toy maker. Polytheism -- There are many toy makers. Evolutionism -- The toys made themselves. Church of Christ, Scientist -- We are the toys. Communism -- Everyone gets the same number of toys, and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours. B'Hai -- All toys are just fine with us. Amish -- Toys with batteries are surely a sin. Taoism -- The doll is as important as the dump truck. Mormonism -- Every boy can have as many toys as he wants. Voodoo -- Let me borrow that doll for a second. Hedonism -- To heck with the rule book!? Let's play! Hinduism -- He who plays with bags of plastic farm animals, loses. 7th Day Adventist -- He who plays with his toys on Saturday, loses. Church of Christ -- He whose toys make music, loses. Baptist -- Once played, always played. Jehovah's Witnesses -- He who sells the most toys door-to-door, wins. Pentecostalism -- He whose toys can talk, wins. Existentialism -- Toys are a figment of your imagination. Confucianism -- Once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no longer dry. Non-denominationalism -- We don't care where the toys came from, let's just play with them. Agnosticism -- It is not possible to know whether toys make a bit of difference. Apathy -- Toys? What do I need toys for? Judaism -- I'm selling. You buying? First Kinky Church -- You bet your ass we got Toys. First American Church -- We play Only with cowboy toys. Church of Scientology -- Toys 'R Us. * * * --- " music, the greatest good that mortals know and all of heaven we have below. " (harold adamson) impending gigs - Plur My Ass! - June 30th, 1999 drop modulation audio - http://members.tripod.com/drop_modulation __ ICQ# 26360618 " Example: Where can I find information about the hobby pyrotechnics? " (alta-vista) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ eGroups.com home: /group/12-step-free - Simplifying group communications Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 1999 Report Share Posted June 16, 1999 And then there's... Pantheism -- Toys are everywhere! AA -- Toys are bad, but if you go to enough meetings God will take them away from you. -- wally Your morning smile >If Religion Dealt With Toys > >Capitalism -- He who dies with the most toys, wins. > >Hare Krshna -- He who plays with the most toys, wins. > >Catholicism -- He who denies himself the most toys, wins. > >Anglican -- They were our toys first. > >Greek Orthodox -- No, they were OURS first. > >Branch ians -- He who dies playing with the biggest toys, wins. > >Atheism -- There is no toy maker. > >Polytheism -- There are many toy makers. > >Evolutionism -- The toys made themselves. > >Church of Christ, Scientist -- We are the toys. > >Communism -- Everyone gets the same number of toys, and you go straight to >hell if we catch you selling yours. > >B'Hai -- All toys are just fine with us. > >Amish -- Toys with batteries are surely a sin. > >Taoism -- The doll is as important as the dump truck. > >Mormonism -- Every boy can have as many toys as he wants. > >Voodoo -- Let me borrow that doll for a second. > >Hedonism -- To heck with the rule book!? Let's play! > >Hinduism -- He who plays with bags of plastic farm animals, loses. > >7th Day Adventist -- He who plays with his toys on Saturday, loses. > >Church of Christ -- He whose toys make music, loses. > >Baptist -- Once played, always played. > >Jehovah's Witnesses -- He who sells the most toys door-to-door, wins. > >Pentecostalism -- He whose toys can talk, wins. > >Existentialism -- Toys are a figment of your imagination. > >Confucianism -- Once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no longer dry. > >Non-denominationalism -- We don't care where the toys came from, let's >just play with them. > >Agnosticism -- It is not possible to know whether toys make a bit of >difference. > >Apathy -- Toys? What do I need toys for? > >Judaism -- I'm selling. You buying? > >First Kinky Church -- You bet your ass we got Toys. > >First American Church -- We play Only with cowboy toys. > >Church of Scientology -- Toys 'R Us. > >* * * > >--- > " music, the greatest good that mortals know and all of heaven we have >below. " (harold adamson) >impending gigs - Plur My Ass! - June 30th, 1999 >drop modulation audio - http://members.tripod.com/drop_modulation __ ICQ# >26360618 > " Example: Where can I find information about the hobby pyrotechnics? " >(alta-vista) > > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >eGroups Spotlight: > " Lightning Strike Survivor List " - on-line support group for lightning strike >survivors and their families. http://clickhere./click/111 > > >eGroups.com home: /group/12-step-free > - Simplifying group communications > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ eGroups.com home: /group/12-step-free - Simplifying group communications Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 1999 Report Share Posted June 16, 1999 Hi Jovian; Love your " Morning Smile " It offends as many folks as possible, equally! Made my day ------------------------------------------------------------------------ eGroups.com home: /group/12-step-free - Simplifying group communications Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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