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Hello,

I have just joined the list and wanted to say a bit about how

I got here and why.

I have tried 12 step groups over and over, and something just

doesn't sit right. I couldn't put my finger on it, yet I know that

there are people who have been helped by them.

My experience has been that the less " program " talk and

material used, and the more actual caring of people sharing

their thoughts and feelings, the better.

The places where lots of slogans and emphasis on " steps "

were going on-well, I was usually out of there and not coming

back.

I would have the mixed feeling that I SHOULD somehow be

able to do these steps, to want to do them. But something in

me resists, and it just doesn't feel right.

Some of what they say has helped me. I think that the best

group I ever went to was one for Incest Survivors, and that

one didn't use the " Big Book " (oh I hate that phrase-don't really

know why), but another book, concentrated on building our

self esteem by saying positive affirmations....and I had to ask

myself, well, wasn't this just really a support group with

caring people helping each other? I think just getting a hug from

someone is enough to make my day, anyway. And there are a

lot of other very lonely scared people out there who feel the

same.

Anyway, I know that some groups work for some people,

but I just can't take having to say that I'm a " compulsive

overeater " anymore. I want that phrase out of my head. And

maybe if I told myself that many times that I was a person who

was in tune with my body's needs, I'd change my habits.

Sometimes I think that a person without any eating disorder

at all would develop one if every day for months at a time,

they said their name, and then defined who they were by saying

that they were a " compulsive overeater. "

Thanks from Emy

glow@...

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