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>Date: 27 Jun 1998 19:34:52 -0000

>

>Subject: newbie

>To: 12-step-free@...

>

>I have been in AA for 4 years and haven't attended a meeting for

2 months. I am currently experiencing a lot of anger from my 12

step involvement, specifically anger toward my sponsor. I realize

I have been brainwashed. There have been so many red flags that

have gone up in the past 4 years, but because I thought I had

" flaws " in my character, I decided to obey the steppers. Now I am

angry, especially with my sponsor. What makes it really hard is

that we have become good friends and now she is giving me the

cold shoulder because of my " attitude problem. "

>I don't understand how people can be so phony. It is almost

sub-human behavior. Has anyone else experienced this and what did

you do?? I miss my sponsor, but I know that it was not a healthy

relationship. When will I feel better? I don't want to drink and

I don't buy the " disease " explanation of the steppers. Maybe I am

NORMAL!! I just feel very angry and disappointed in all the

people I have come to know in AA.

>

>

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I've been out of AA for about two years now and I bump into my

old sponsor now and then. He always seems to be looking for my

devil horns or for a 666 tattoo on me. He or the other groupers I

see around town just can't fathom someone simply not drinking

because they don't feel like drinking. Since I left AA all of the

" friends " I made pretty much give me the cold shoulder because I

guess sober isn't good enough for them unless you're program

sober. Oh well, I still have all my real friends so the loss of a

few hypocrites doesn't really make too much difference.

______________________________________________________

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Guest guest

>Date: 27 Jun 1998 19:34:52 -0000

>

>Subject: newbie

>To: 12-step-free@...

>

>I have been in AA for 4 years and haven't attended a meeting for

2 months. I am currently experiencing a lot of anger from my 12

step involvement, specifically anger toward my sponsor. I realize

I have been brainwashed. There have been so many red flags that

have gone up in the past 4 years, but because I thought I had

" flaws " in my character, I decided to obey the steppers. Now I am

angry, especially with my sponsor. What makes it really hard is

that we have become good friends and now she is giving me the

cold shoulder because of my " attitude problem. "

>I don't understand how people can be so phony. It is almost

sub-human behavior. Has anyone else experienced this and what did

you do?? I miss my sponsor, but I know that it was not a healthy

relationship. When will I feel better? I don't want to drink and

I don't buy the " disease " explanation of the steppers. Maybe I am

NORMAL!! I just feel very angry and disappointed in all the

people I have come to know in AA.

>

>

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I've been out of AA for about two years now and I bump into my

old sponsor now and then. He always seems to be looking for my

devil horns or for a 666 tattoo on me. He or the other groupers I

see around town just can't fathom someone simply not drinking

because they don't feel like drinking. Since I left AA all of the

" friends " I made pretty much give me the cold shoulder because I

guess sober isn't good enough for them unless you're program

sober. Oh well, I still have all my real friends so the loss of a

few hypocrites doesn't really make too much difference.

______________________________________________________

Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com

----

Read this list on the Web at http://www.FindMail.com/list/12-step-free/

To unsubscribe, email to 12-step-free-unsubscribe@...

To subscribe, email to 12-step-free-subscribe@...

--

Start a FREE E-Mail List at http://makelist.com !

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Guest guest

At 07:34 PM 6/27/98 -0000, stevie wrote:

>I have been in AA for 4 years and haven't attended a meeting for 2 months.

I am

>I don't understand how people can be so phony. It is almost sub-human

behavior.

>Has anyone else experienced this and what did you do?? I miss my sponsor,

but I

>know that it was not a healthy relationship. When will I feel better? I

don't

>want to drink and I don't buy the " disease " explanation of the steppers.

Maybe I

>am NORMAL!!

>I just feel very angry and disappointed in all the people I have

>come to know in AA.

It's a cult, like an emotional pyramid scheme. The people you know in the

program themselves also bought into it. But yes, I believe everyone is

'normal' and anger is a normal response when you find out you've been misled

for years. Part of my reading that helped me deal with AA (actually I'm

still dealing with it, and when I read messages like yours it brings up the

anger I have at sponsors and others in AA), is of cours all the usual

heretical books, but also some things on the net by people who were involved

with various other cults - Scientology and Amway come immediately to mind.

Yahoo has direct links to such sites.

-----

http://www.mindspring.com/~benbradley

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Guest guest

At 19:34 27/06/98 -0000, you wrote:

>I have been in AA for 4 years and haven't attended a meeting for 2 months.

I am currently experiencing a lot of anger from my 12 step involvement,

specifically anger toward my sponsor. I realize I have been brainwashed.

There have been so many red flags that have gone up in the past 4 years,

but because I thought I had " flaws " in my character, I decided to obey the

steppers. Now I am angry, especially with my sponsor. What makes it really

hard is that we have become good friends and now she is giving me the cold

shoulder because of my " attitude problem. "

>I don't understand how people can be so phony. It is almost sub-human

behavior. Has anyone else experienced this and what did you do?? I miss my

sponsor, but I know that it was not a healthy relationship. When will I

feel better? I don't want to drink and I don't buy the " disease "

explanation of the steppers. Maybe I am NORMAL!! I just feel very angry and

disappointed in all the people I have come to know in AA.

Hi Stevie, and welcome. I think it is fairly natural to feel some anger

when you discover that most of what you have been told isn't really true.

The trick fro me anyway, is to try to grasp what really IS true, and focus

on that. I couldn't think of one of my old sponsors without feeling angry

towards him for quite a while. But ultimately the joke was on him- he still

thinks he needs to go and sit in meetings in the evenings instead of doing

something he enjoys. He doesn't realise that since he stopped using fifteen

years ago he no longer has a drug problem! No-one can tell you when you

will feel better simply because no-one can predict future events. But it

could be very soon! What I found helpful was to remind myself that one some

level all those people are sincerely deluded. It functions like a cult-

they get sucked in and im a sense it wasn't their fault- not that they

aren't responsible for what they believe- they are- they just don't realise

it! And when someone leaves a cult it is supposed to be very dangerous and

they will naturally avoid too much contact with you. They think you have a

disease that is running rampant because you are now thinking for yourself

(they have been taught this is dangerous) and they don't want it to affect

(infect!) them. Now I'm out of it, have been for a while, and I feel REALLY

good about that. They say the best revenge is to live well. Its true. BTW I

needed to read a few books to confirm that I was right to leave and drop

the disease philosophy. There are some good books out there now. Yes,

you're normal. Welcome back to the human race.

Joe Berenbaum

Don't keep it simple- keep it effective

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Read this list on the Web at http://www.FindMail.com/list/12-step-free/

To unsubscribe, email to 12-step-free-unsubscribe@...

To subscribe, email to 12-step-free-subscribe@...

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  • 6 years later...
Guest guest

Hello. My name is Bethany e, I am married and have 3 young

children...I have no time for fatigue! LOL I found this group

through doing a search on the internet and am hoping to find some

answers. I have almost all of the symptoms of hypothyroidism...yet

my blood tests aren't showing a problem. I just got the test

results back yesterday from my ob, she will call back on Mon and I'm

going to ask what the numbers are. There's a checklist on a thyroid

site and I have almost all the symptoms, that's why I find myself so

stumped and frustrated and even confused about all of this. It's

very frustrating, actually.

Anyway, thank you for letting me join, especially since I haven't

been diagnosed or anything yet.

Bethany

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