Re: Hi -- Need some support

[Guest guest]

Marcy, I really feel " with " you regarding alot of these post-explant

feelings. Although I am more elderly, I have suffered from low-self-

body-image most of my life. As a young girl, I was always taunted

with " when are you going to grow boobs??! And then when I did, they

were a 32A at the largest. That's what I was when I implanted in

1986. I went to a 34C. Well, I looked really weird, to me that is.

My ex-husband thought it was sexy... a really think body with these

big boobs - help me!!! I got lots of looks from the guys, and

jealousy from the women. I hated it. Soon after implant I regretted

it.

Last July 26 I had 20 year old " moldy, toxic " bags removed from my

body and have been feeling relieved ever since. Yes, I have my

feelings to work through now. I, too, have gone into a bit of

depression, grieving the loss of my so-called attention I used to

get. And the fact that I had to change my physical appearance because

I hated myself and the way I looked. I don't have a partner in my

life at the moment, so I suppose that makes it easier on me for being

naked in bed! lol My cat is unconditional with me! lol Have to

throw in a few laughs --- it keeps me going.

Please tell yourself, Marcy, that you are perfect just the way you

are and try to focus more on your " inside " your good heart, your

caring nature, and the fact that you lived through poisonous toxins,

and can be here, alive, for your family. I know it's hard. Some

days I wish I could go back and not have implanted in the first

place. No one told me I was o.k. the way I was. Even my mother, out

of love, I found out later, tried to save me from being teased like

she was. She always commented on my breasts, like " maybe you should

wear falsies... " That's what she did to avoid being teased by the

ladies in her circle at work. Sad, eh?

Anyway, Marcy, tell yourself you're beautiful, because you are. Our

American society has gone bonkers, as far as I'm concerned, regarding

the importance of our physical beauty. It's like a plague.

My prayers are with you and I am here for you anytime.

Love & Healing,

Sunny

>

> Hi Ladies,

>

> It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to

> read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured

> implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March of

> this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some

> emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't seem

> to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional

> rollar coaster since my explant. I had a while this spring/summer

> when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I

> started working out regularly in August. You would think I would

be

> happy about the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I

am

> getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about my

> looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size

> smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what

it

> would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I now

> have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my figure.

> I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds

> vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I had

> implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look great

> for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I have

> heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now

> dealing with all the reasons that I got implants in the first

> place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so

> please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway

for

> implants. I just really need to hear from someone that I am not

> alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in such

a

> short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.

> Thanks for listening. Marcy

>

[Guest guest]

Dear Marcy,

I know how you feel. Sometimes when I am feeling down about my lost "hourglass" figure (now that I am back to being a pear), I think about the women whose beauty I have admired, who are also small-breasted. Some are strangers, some celebrities, some are people I know. What they have in common, or what they seem to project, anyway, is not only an acceptance of their bodies, but an appreciation of them.

Sure, you may not get the same appreciative looks that you used to, but those looks were for something not entirely you. When I see a woman with implants (I can always tell!) I feel sorry for her. I pity her because she is still trapped in that prison of having to fit herself to society's expectations. When she got them she was vulnerable and hurt, otherwise she wouldn't have mutilated herself.

Feeling depressed about your explant results is a sign that you are working through something on a deeper level. Maybe you are struggling with letting go of your old ideas about what is beautiful in a woman-- if so, this is good. NOBODY has a "perfect" body. When you are feeling bad about how you look, try and remind yourself of the things that make you truly beautiful, things that have little to do with how you look. Your acceptance of yourself will project your own unique beauty.

Big breasts or no, we will all get older and lose what outer beauty our youth had to offer. Will we happy with our bodies then? Going through trials of illness and aging are a chance to deepen our love for ourselves. Reminding ourselves of what treasures we still posess (the chance to regain our health, be with our loved ones, have a meaningful life) can help us through these difficult times.

This doesn't mean we have to give up trying to make the most of our beauty-- it just means we can look beyond the idea that it is only about how we look. Go ahead and wear a Wonderbra if it makes you look/feel better. You can take it off at night and revel in the soft realness of your own body. Be extra kind to yourself and pamper yourself as if you were a special friend. Have lots of baths and walks and music and cups of tea. You deserve it. You've been through a lot. Play with your children-- they see your true beauty.

Bindi

Hi -- Need some support

Hi Ladies,It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March of this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't seem to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional rollar coaster since my explant. I had a while this spring/summer when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I started working out regularly in August. You would think I would be happy about the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I am getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about my looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what it would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I now have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my figure. I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I had implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look great for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I have heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now dealing with all the reasons that I got implants in the first place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway for implants. I just really need to hear from someone that I am not alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in such a short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.Thanks for listening. Marcy

[Guest guest]

Dear Bindi,

What a wise and understanding response to Marcy's concerns and feelings

about the change she's been through. Just want to say--let's hear it

for pears! LOL! As a nurse I've observed the aging female body in many

many forms, and women with small breasts age more attractively IMHO and

certainly much more comfortably than women with large breasts! So, love

what you've got!

freebindi wrote:

> Dear Marcy,

> I know how you feel. Sometimes when I am feeling down about my lost

> " hourglass " figure (now that I am back to being a pear), I think about

> the women whose beauty I have admired, who are also small-breasted.

> Some are strangers, some celebrities, some are people I know. What

> they have in common, or what they seem to project, anyway, is not only

> an acceptance of their bodies, but an appreciation of them.

>

> Sure, you may not get the same appreciative looks that you used to,

> but those looks were for something not entirely you. When I see a

> woman with implants (I can always tell!) I feel sorry for her. I pity

> her because she is still trapped in that prison of having to fit

> herself to society's expectations. When she got them she was

> vulnerable and hurt, otherwise she wouldn't have mutilated herself.

>

> Feeling depressed about your explant results is a sign that you are

> working through something on a deeper level. Maybe you are struggling

> with letting go of your old ideas about what is beautiful in a woman--

> if so, this is good. NOBODY has a " perfect " body. When you are feeling

> bad about how you look, try and remind yourself of the things that

> make you truly beautiful, things that have little to do with how you

> look. Your acceptance of yourself will project your own unique beauty.

>

> Big breasts or no, we will all get older and lose what outer beauty

> our youth had to offer. Will we happy with our bodies then? Going

> through trials of illness and aging are a chance to deepen our love

> for ourselves. Reminding ourselves of what treasures we still posess

> (the chance to regain our health, be with our loved ones, have a

> meaningful life) can help us through these difficult times.

>

> This doesn't mean we have to give up trying to make the most of our

> beauty-- it just means we can look beyond the idea that it is only

> about how we look. Go ahead and wear a Wonderbra if it makes you

> look/feel better. You can take it off at night and revel in the soft

> realness of your own body. Be extra kind to yourself and pamper

> yourself as if you were a special friend. Have lots of baths and walks

> and music and cups of tea. You deserve it. You've been through a lot.

> Play with your children-- they see your true beauty.

> Bindi

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Marcy,

I'm sorry you're feeling down. Even though I'm happier without the

implants and like being small breasted, I wanted to respond anyway.

I have definitely seen posts from women who are struggling because

they liked having larger breasts, but knew the implants made them

sick. I don't think there's anything I can say to make you feel

better, but I believe in your case it's almost as if you're in

mourning. It's going to take time before you accept things as they

are, and I hope in time you can accept your body as it is. We are

so much more than breasts. I've had a hard time filling a bra my

entire life, and it bothered me before I got implants, but for some

reason I adjusted quickly to explant. At first I felt very flat,

but after a couple of months I didn't. I think in my head, I see

myself with a larger chest than I've got, and as long as my head

thinks it's so, it's so.

Sis

>

> Hi Ladies,

>

> It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to

> read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured

> implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March

of

> this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some

> emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't seem

> to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional

> rollar coaster since my explant. I had a while this spring/summer

> when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I

> started working out regularly in August. You would think I would

be

> happy about the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I

am

> getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about my

> looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size

> smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what

it

> would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I

now

> have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my

figure.

> I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds

> vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I

had

> implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look

great

> for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I have

> heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now

> dealing with all the reasons that I got implants in the first

> place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so

> please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway

for

> implants. I just really need to hear from someone that I am not

> alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in such

a

> short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.

> Thanks for listening. Marcy

>

[Guest guest]

Bindi,

Very well said, and I agree.

Sis

>

> Dear Marcy,

> I know how you feel. Sometimes when I am feeling down about my

lost " hourglass " figure (now that I am back to being a pear), I

think about the women whose beauty I have admired, who are also

small-breasted. Some are strangers, some celebrities, some are

people I know. What they have in common, or what they seem to

project, anyway, is not only an acceptance of their bodies, but an

appreciation of them.

>

> Sure, you may not get the same appreciative looks that you used

to, but those looks were for something not entirely you. When I see

a woman with implants (I can always tell!) I feel sorry for her. I

pity her because she is still trapped in that prison of having to

fit herself to society's expectations. When she got them she was

vulnerable and hurt, otherwise she wouldn't have mutilated herself.

>

> Feeling depressed about your explant results is a sign that you

are working through something on a deeper level. Maybe you are

struggling with letting go of your old ideas about what is beautiful

in a woman-- if so, this is good. NOBODY has a " perfect " body. When

you are feeling bad about how you look, try and remind yourself of

the things that make you truly beautiful, things that have little to

do with how you look. Your acceptance of yourself will project your

own unique beauty.

>

> Big breasts or no, we will all get older and lose what outer

beauty our youth had to offer. Will we happy with our bodies then?

Going through trials of illness and aging are a chance to deepen our

love for ourselves. Reminding ourselves of what treasures we still

posess (the chance to regain our health, be with our loved ones,

have a meaningful life) can help us through these difficult times.

>

> This doesn't mean we have to give up trying to make the most of

our beauty-- it just means we can look beyond the idea that it is

only about how we look. Go ahead and wear a Wonderbra if it makes

you look/feel better. You can take it off at night and revel in the

soft realness of your own body. Be extra kind to yourself and pamper

yourself as if you were a special friend. Have lots of baths and

walks and music and cups of tea. You deserve it. You've been through

a lot. Play with your children-- they see your true beauty.

> Bindi

> Hi -- Need some support

>

>

> Hi Ladies,

>

> It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to

> read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured

> implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March

of

> this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some

> emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't

seem

> to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional

> rollar coaster since my explant. I had a while this

spring/summer

> when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I

> started working out regularly in August. You would think I would

be

> happy about the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I

am

> getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about

my

> looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size

> smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what

it

> would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I

now

> have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my

figure.

> I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds

> vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I

had

> implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look

great

> for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I

have

> heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now

> dealing with all the reasons that I got implants in the first

> place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so

> please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway

for

> implants. I just really need to hear from someone that I am not

> alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in

such a

> short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.

> Thanks for listening. Marcy

>

[Guest guest]

Marcy: Sorry you're not happy with the way you look after explant. Some women look as good or better after explant, but there are some, like me, who don't. This is a tough thing to deal with emotionally. I've had 7 surgeries, so I lost tissue and am pretty flat/disfigured with scars. I wear a bra with water inserts that makes me look almost as good as I used to in clothes. You'll probably find shopping for tops and swimsuits more challenging. You say you're working out and getting toned, why not look for clothes that emphasize the areas of your body you like? There are some styles I can't wear now and I dress a lot more conservatively than I used to (i.e. wearing t-shirts to the gym instead of tank tops). It was probably time to dress more age appropriate anyway--I'm 45 and feel that this illlness aged me, although people say I look like I'm in my 30s. In time

you'll adjust to your new body. Katemkkinzy1 <mkkinzy@...> wrote: Hi Ladies,It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March of this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't seem to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional rollar

coaster since my explant. I had a while this spring/summer when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I started working out regularly in August. You would think I would be happy about the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I am getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about my looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what it would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I now have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my figure. I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I had implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look great for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I have heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now dealing with all the

reasons that I got implants in the first place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway for implants. I just really need to hear from someone that I am not alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in such a short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.Thanks for listening. Marcy

Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Small Business.

[Guest guest]

Marcey, I'm sorry you're feeling bad about your bust size after explant . . . Most women are so glad to start feeling better that they're happy with whatever results they get! . .. and their hubbies are thrilled to get their wife back! While on vacation, I watched a ballerina, who was as flat as I've ever seen anyone - wear clothing that left no doubt about her size. She was stunning! . . . Never did I hear anyone comment on how flat she was . . . they did talk about how beautiful she was, how thin and limber she was, and how beautiful her costumes were . . . but if anyone was conscious of her breast size, no one mentioned it. I'm suspicious that, when push comes to shove, we'd be amazed at how little anyone else cares about OUR bust size. Everyone is too busy worrying about their own self-perceived short comings to care about yours. . . Tell me . . . would your feelings

change about ANY of your loved ones if they had different physical features? . . . Or would you be sick with concern if any of your loved ones did something to their body that could lead to their eventual illness? Sometimes we need to put on different hats to examine our feelings . . . If the media was telling us that we're ALL beautiful because we're God's creations, (rather of depicting women as impossibly beautiful and sexy) there would be ever so much less misery in this world! Right? Much of what you see in the media is so touched up, it bears little resemblance to the real thing! . . . Go find a sexy, pretty bra that makes you feel like a million bucks . .. and be glad that you can take it off when you want to feel light and free! Hugs and prayers, Rogene

[Guest guest]

Marcy, I am also sorry you are not feeling so well about the way your breasts look. I can somewhat agree with you, as I miss my full perky breasts. I also have a hard time filling an A cup, just like pre-implants era. I really don't think about my puny little boobies anymore, because I can't get passed my HUGE butt. The horrible reality is I am afaid to lose weight because the first place that goes on me is my boobs. Hugs, Kate Lowe <lagarita120@...> wrote: Marcy: Sorry you're not happy with the way you look after explant. Some women look as good or better after explant, but there are some, like me, who don't. This is a tough thing to deal with emotionally. I've had 7 surgeries, so I lost tissue and am pretty flat/disfigured with scars. I wear a bra with water inserts that makes me look almost as good as I used to in clothes. You'll probably find shopping for tops and swimsuits more challenging. You say you're working out and getting toned, why not look for clothes that emphasize the areas of your body you like? There are some styles I can't wear now and I dress a lot more conservatively than I used to (i.e. wearing t-shirts to the gym instead of tank tops). It was probably time to dress more age appropriate anyway--I'm 45 and feel that this illlness aged me,

although people say I look like I'm in my 30s. In time you'll adjust to your new body. Katemkkinzy1 <mkkinzymsn> wrote: Hi Ladies,It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March of this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't seem to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional rollar coaster since my explant. I had a while this spring/summer when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I started working out regularly in August. You would think I would be happy about

the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I am getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about my looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what it would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I now have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my figure. I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I had implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look great for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I have heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now dealing with all the reasons that I got implants in the first place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway for implants. I just really

need to hear from someone that I am not alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in such a short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.Thanks for listening. Marcy Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Small Business.

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[Guest guest]

Hi Marcy,

Just wanted to say that I too am in the same boat. Probably an AA now but no-one would really know as I wear pretty padded bras, water bras too. In fact, I think I look better in strappy tops now than before. When I swim, I wear bikini bottoms and a small strappy top over my bra. No-one seems to notice. OK, so I don't like the look of me when I take my shower and my partner is still waiting for me to remove my bra when I go to bed, but I am not ready for that and I feel just as sexy in my cute lacy bras so it hasn't hindered our relationship sexually either (though I have to admit to missing that certain touch!!)lol

I am just so happy that I no longer feel sick inside and my joint pains have gone. My parents came to visit last week, I hadn't seen them for 2 and half years and my Mum was amazed at how well I looked.!! It gave me a buzz and made me feel good about myself.

Love

.

-- Re: Hi -- Need some support

Marcy,

I am also sorry you are not feeling so well about the way your breasts look. I can somewhat agree with you, as I miss my full perky breasts. I also have a hard time filling an A cup, just like pre-implants era. I really don't think about my puny little boobies anymore, because I can't get passed my HUGE butt. The horrible reality is I am afaid to lose weight because the first place that goes on me is my boobs.

Hugs,

Kate Lowe <lagarita120 > wrote:

Marcy:

Sorry you're not happy with the way you look after explant. Some women look as good or better after explant, but there are some, like me, who don't. This is a tough thing to deal with emotionally. I've had 7 surgeries, so I lost tissue and am pretty flat/disfigured with scars. I wear a bra with water inserts that makes me look almost as good as I used to in clothes. You'll probably find shopping for tops and swimsuits more challenging. You say you're working out and getting toned, why not look for clothes that emphasize the areas of your body you like? There are some styles I can't wear now and I dress a lot more conservatively than I used to (i.e. wearing t-shirts to the gym instead of tank tops). It was probably time to dress more age appropriate anyway--I'm 45 and feel that this illlness aged me, although people say I look like I'm in my 30s.

In time you'll adjust to your new body.

Katemkkinzy1 <mkkinzymsn> wrote:

Hi Ladies,It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March of this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't seem to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional rollar coaster since my explant. I had a while this spring/summer when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I started working out regularly in August. You would think I would be happy about the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I am getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about my looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what it would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I now have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my figure. I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I had implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look great for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I have heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now dealing with all the reasons that I got implants in the first place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway for implants. I just really need to hear from someone that I am not alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in such a short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.Thanks for listening. Marcy

Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Small Business.

Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.

[Guest guest]

Marcy,

I hope you've been able to come to terms with some of these feelings. I know how hard it is, but there is healing waiting for you as you look for truth about your value in the eyes of God. God does not care about our outside packages, but rather the heart. And when it all comes down to the end of our life, our outside package isn't what counts most, but rather how we've lived our life out with others.

You are definitely not alone with the way you feel after going through all this. There was a time for me when I really detested my breasts and how they made me feel. But through emotional maturity and healing, I was able to get past all of those bad feelings and lies I believed about myself. The secret lies in being able to replace the bad things we're telling ourselves-- or hearing in our heads-- with truth that is real. And the truth is that we are all beautiful creations, with healthy bodies just the way God made them, and that bigger breasts don't mean a thing in the big picture. The size of our breasts has nothing to do with our value or worth in God's eyes.

Man's focus in on the outward appearance....and man can never be satisfied. But God's focus in on the heart, and He loves you so very much....He is desperate for you--your value to Him is incalculable. Begin seeing yourself through God's eyes. It will make all the difference in the world.

Patty

Hi -- Need some support

Hi Ladies,It has been quite a while since my last post, but I still try to read some of the posts. I got saline under the muscle textured implants in 2000. I had my implants removed by Dr Feng in March of this year. The reason that I am posting tonight is I need some emotional support. I am really down about my looks and can't seem to shake the way I feel. I feel like I have been on an emotional rollar coaster since my explant. I had a while this spring/summer when I was so angry. But now I just feel really depressed. I started working out regularly in August. You would think I would be happy about the results I am getting, but I just feel so down. I am getting really defined muscles, but just don't feel good about my looks. My breasts are so small since explant -- a whole size smaller than before implant. I got a lift and can't imagine what it would be like without. I barely fill out an A cup size now. I now

have a hard time finding clothes styles that compliment my figure. I have a hard time looking in the mirror. I know this sounds vain... but I used to get compliments on a regular basis when I had implants. Comments like you are in such good shape, you look great for being a mother of 3, etc. Since explant the only thing I have heard is you look like you lost weight -- are you okay. I am now dealing with all the reasons that I got implants in the first place. I know that my health suffered from having implants, so please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I am not in anyway for implants. I just really need to hear from someone that I am not alone in the way I feel. This has been a lot to deal with in such a short time -- emotionally, physcially, financially, etc.Thanks for listening. Marcy