Re: Not so good news - please respond!

December 20, 2002

Hi,

I am sorry to hear your news. But I am Stage ll, had one node involved and my

margins were not clear. I had decided on a mastectomy so did not need further

surgery. I will celebrate my 13th yr in May. I had 6 mo of chemo. If there is

anything I can do please let me know. I would be willing to talk to you but

would want to send my phone number through email.

Hugs

marianne

Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life

http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html

Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:

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Not so good news - please respond!

I came back from my appointment with the surgeon today. He told me

that my cancer has spread to my lymph nodes (at least the one they

initially disected - which is full of cancer) and he doesn't have the

full pathology report but told me that I'm at least a Stage 2. He

told me that there is a possibility that it has spread to other parts

of my body, and that I will probably have a CT Scan and a bone scan

done to find out. He told me my margins were good and I thought that

was a good thing, because I thought he was talking about the chances

of DCIS and all, but he said they needed to test for that yet, and if

the margins weren't negative then I'd have to have a mastectomy. I

need to hear from others out there who have been in this boat and are

doing OK. My doctor isn't a big one for bedside manners, and wasn't

able to give me any reassurances that I would come out of this

alive. He pretty much told me that his part is about over - he had

the " local control " part of the job, in that he took out the tumor.

Now the oncologist and radiologist are doing their part, coming up.

My parents are here, and they are from Minnesota - they are insisting

that I go to the Mayo Clinic for anything more. I'm certainly not

opposed to this. Also, I need more people to talk with about what's

going on with me. Do any people on this list exchange phone

numbers? I'd sure appreciate being able to talk with some folks

in " person " . Anyway, please let me know what your experiences have

been - thanks!

December 20, 2002

I wanted to offer my support. I'm not there yet, am still waiting for

a biopsy. My mom went through it all this year. I don't know where

you're located or how you feel about your doctor and hospital

facilities, but I highly recommend a 2nd opinion at a recognized

cancer center. They may tell you the same thing as your local

doctors, but that may be enough for you to make a well-informed

decision without any second guessing. I know that some ladies in this

group can offer the specific info you are looking for, so I will

leave that to them. Hang in there and I'll be praying for you!

December 20, 2002

Hi there, " myfurkidsmom " . I'm so sorry your answers weren't what you wanted

and expected to hear. But, although I know it's hard, try not to freak out.

Your surgeon sounds, from his bedside manner, like he should have been a

vet. Almost all breast cancers have spread by the time of detection to at

least one lymph node, if not more. I think on this entire list I've only

heard of one woman who had zero lymph node involvement. Yes it is

theoretically possible that your cancer has spread to the rest of your body

and you could die, but it is highly unlikely. I was diagnosed at Stage III

and the cancer hadn't spread beyond my breast. Most likely yours hasn't

either. I'm glad you're done with that particular surgeon because he sounds

about as empathetic as a pet rock.

All cancers have the possibility to spread and that's probably why your

surgeon said what he did. And all cancers have the *potential* to kill you

eventually. Had you asked him the percentage of your cancer having already

spread to the point of endangering your life, he'd probably have said about

one in a thousand, or less likely. Even after the CAT scan and the bone

scan, you might not know for absolute certain. My first CAT scan showed an

inconclusive liver thingie that, after six months, hasn't changed so it's

most likely not cancer. My second CAT scan (last week) showed an

inconclusive lung thingie that is too small to test further so I will go

ahead with my surgery and be rescanned in three months, at which point the

lung thingie will probably be fine and the scan will show yet ANOTHER

inconclusive something or other. My oncologist said these tests are too

accurate for their own good. We all have " thingies " in our bodies and most

of them aren't cancer. And although all cancer *can* theoretically spread

and kill us, most of the time, with early detection breast cancer, it doesn't.

I know how hard it is, because I'm going through the same thing myself

right now with my lung thingie, but try to remember that the odds that are

your cancer has not spread beyond the lymph nodes. There's a reason why

everyone who has bc has at least some lymph nodes removed. We almost all

have cancer in at least one node. And most of us do NOT have cancer

anywhere else in our bodies.

I'm sorry for your scare, and all I can say is try to ignore it, as it

seems highly unlikely it's anything worse than an inconsiderate jerk of a

doctor telling you something that, while theoretically possible, is most

unlikely in your case.

If you want to email me offlist to talk more about this, feel free. I'm at

merrillcat@.... Since we're in exactly the same boat at the moment,

maybe I could help?

Try to relax and enjoy the holidays.

Very best wishes,

Jill

p.s. I'm not much of a phone person but I'd be glad to talk to you if you

think it would help. Please email me offline for my phone number, though; I

don't feel comfortable posting it on the list. Not because of us legitimate

members, but who knows who might be lurking out there.

At 03:12 AM 12/20/2002 +0000, you wrote:

>I came back from my appointment with the surgeon today. He told me

>that my cancer has spread to my lymph nodes (at least the one they

>initially disected - which is full of cancer) and he doesn't have the

>full pathology report but told me that I'm at least a Stage 2. He

>told me that there is a possibility that it has spread to other parts

>of my body, and that I will probably have a CT Scan and a bone scan

>done to find out. He told me my margins were good and I thought that

>was a good thing, because I thought he was talking about the chances

>of DCIS and all, but he said they needed to test for that yet, and if

>the margins weren't negative then I'd have to have a mastectomy. I

>need to hear from others out there who have been in this boat and are

>doing OK. My doctor isn't a big one for bedside manners, and wasn't

>able to give me any reassurances that I would come out of this

>alive. He pretty much told me that his part is about over - he had

>the " local control " part of the job, in that he took out the tumor.

>Now the oncologist and radiologist are doing their part, coming up.

>My parents are here, and they are from Minnesota - they are insisting

>that I go to the Mayo Clinic for anything more. I'm certainly not

>opposed to this. Also, I need more people to talk with about what's

>going on with me. Do any people on this list exchange phone

>numbers? I'd sure appreciate being able to talk with some folks

>in " person " . Anyway, please let me know what your experiences have

>been - thanks!

>

December 20, 2002

i would be willing to talk to you over the phone......just let me know

healing hugs and prayers

carol from michigan

December 20, 2002

I would be more than happy to talk on the phone with you but I had

stage almost 0 and no node involvement and therefore no chemo after my

mastectomy. If you want to talk to me, e-mail me at

mkayla38@... and I will send my number. There are probably

others here, however who have a closer diagnosis than mine. As for

your doctor...if he was not encouraging, I think you should be happy

to be rid of him and going to the new help. We need encouragement

along with any bad news. I will continue to keep you in my prayers.

doris

> I came back from my appointment with the surgeon today. He told me

> that my cancer has spread to my lymph nodes (at least the one they

> initially disected - which is full of cancer) and he doesn't have the

> full pathology report but told me that I'm at least a Stage 2. He

> told me that there is a possibility that it has spread to other parts

> of my body, and that I will probably have a CT Scan and a bone scan

> done to find out. He told me my margins were good and I thought that

> was a good thing, because I thought he was talking about the chances

> of DCIS and all, but he said they needed to test for that yet, and if

> the margins weren't negative then I'd have to have a mastectomy. I

> need to hear from others out there who have been in this boat and are

> doing OK. My doctor isn't a big one for bedside manners, and wasn't

> able to give me any reassurances that I would come out of this

> alive. He pretty much told me that his part is about over - he had

> the " local control " part of the job, in that he took out the tumor.

> Now the oncologist and radiologist are doing their part, coming up.

> My parents are here, and they are from Minnesota - they are insisting

> that I go to the Mayo Clinic for anything more. I'm certainly not

> opposed to this. Also, I need more people to talk with about what's

> going on with me. Do any people on this list exchange phone

> numbers? I'd sure appreciate being able to talk with some folks

> in " person " . Anyway, please let me know what your experiences have

> been - thanks!

December 20, 2002

Jill, don't know if you meant me or not but I had zero node

involvement. Thank God for that but if I had, I would have fought

the battle there too. doris

> Hi there, " myfurkidsmom " . I'm so sorry your answers weren't what you

wanted

> and expected to hear. But, although I know it's hard, try not to

freak out.

> Your surgeon sounds, from his bedside manner, like he should have

been a

> vet. Almost all breast cancers have spread by the time of detection

to at

> least one lymph node, if not more. I think on this entire list I've

only

> heard of one woman who had zero lymph node involvement.

December 20, 2002

Well, Doris, I'm not sure if I meant you, either! Chemo-brain here forgets

a lot. But I am certainly glad you had zero node involvement and didn't

need chemo. And I'm glad you've hung around on the list anyhow to be of

such tremendous help to those of us who didn't roll quite as good a set of

dice as you did. I can always count on a good, informative, and encouraging

answer from you. Sometimes I think of you and nne as the " mothers " of

this list.

Jill

At 09:23 PM 12/20/2002 +0000, you wrote:

>Jill, don't know if you meant me or not but I had zero node

>involvement. Thank God for that but if I had, I would have fought

>the battle there too. doris

>

> > Hi there, " myfurkidsmom " . I'm so sorry your answers weren't what you

>wanted

> > and expected to hear. But, although I know it's hard, try not to

>freak out.

> > Your surgeon sounds, from his bedside manner, like he should have

>been a

> > vet. Almost all breast cancers have spread by the time of detection

>to at

> > least one lymph node, if not more. I think on this entire list I've

>only

> > heard of one woman who had zero lymph node involvement.

December 20, 2002

Hi There!I was diagnosed with Lobular Carcinoma in Nov.2000.The lump

was 2.5 inches.I had a Modified Radical Masectomy and 16 lymph nodes

removed.There was cancer in 6 of the nodes.I did Chemo every 3 weeks

for 6 months and then radiation 5 days a week for 6 weeks.I just had

my 2 year mammogram and it came back ok one more time.They did a full

body bone scan,heart Muga,lung x-rays and a lot of bloodwork as well

as abdomen x-rays and even a biopsy of my cervex and uterus just to

rule out any spread before they started treatments.Luckily all that

came back ok.I did have a rough time with the chemo but it seems to

have done it's job,cause here I am a 2 year survivor and still cancer

free!!So,hang in there,a lot of the Ladies here are even longer

survivors,which gives us short timers hope for a long and cancer free

future. Kathy

> I came back from my appointment with the surgeon today. He told me

> that my cancer has spread to my lymph nodes (at least the one they

> initially disected - which is full of cancer) and he doesn't have

the

> full pathology report but told me that I'm at least a Stage 2.

December 20, 2002