911:: Stop the Insanity, I want to get off (long venting)

[Guest guest]

OK, Saturday and Sunday nights are supposed to be busy. They

were. But Sunday night is supposed to be mellow, a time to

catch up on paperwork, clean the booth, and even goof off for

a bit. Not this Sunday!

Officers who don't know where they are....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You pound it in, put signs up, train, badger, cajole, and

otherwise try to tell 'em that if you don't know where they

are... Well, rookie officer says, " Ten-thirty one at...

stand by. " After a short pause, here comes, " Headquarters,

I'm in <pant> foot pursuit <pant> in the <pant> sixty-three

hundred block of < " > Leesburg < " > Pike < " > assault... "

OK. Tones, get help headed to 6300 Leesburg Pike, just into

Fairfax County to the east of the city, then ask the unit

for a landmark. " Are you by the Seven Corners Center? "

" Negative, headquarter. Seventy-three hundred block of

Leesburg Pike. " Untransmitted cuss word preceded the order

for everyone running code to turn around. I try again to

verify the location... " Understand seventy-three hundred

block of Leesburg Pike. Are you at the Pimmit Hills

Apartments? " The answer came back, " Negative, headquarters.

By the McGruders... " Another silent cuss word as I order

all units to the 7300 block of Lee Highway.

OK, only Dana and Craig and a few others in the area will

get this without an explanation. Falls Church sits at a

historic crossroads of the Leesburg (turn)Pike and Lee

Highway (US-29), surrounded by Arlington County, which

should be part of DC (except that it reverted to Virginia

after the Civil War) and Fairfax County. Lee Highway and

Leesburg Pike cross at a right angle in the center of

Falls Church. The Sheriff and a deputy happened to be

out and joined in, adding to the traffic zooming around

in three directions.

Now, imagine that you are a city council member standing in

the center of town and see police units roar by running code

going east, then going west while one is still going east

(the K-9 was barking so loud that the handler didn't hear

the change in location for 6300 Leesburg Pike to 7300), then

all of them come back to center of town, still lights and

sirens, and turn south on Lee Highway. It must have looked

like the Keystone Cops. Now imagine that you're dispatcher

and the city council member is on the phone asking what's

going on while you're on the 'hot line' with a Fairfax

County dispatcher (it was , Dana) who must think that

Falls Church has fallen apart as I gave her three different

and widely separated locations within two minutes trying to

get help to my rookie in foot pursuit well outside my city

limits ...

Oh, and I was alone. 800MHz radio and hot line in left ear,

450MHZ and routine phones in right, and, as I have said so

many times before, calls occur randomly--all at the same

time. Fights, disorderly folks, etc. Per the LT, called

Arlington for mutual aid for the fight... but they're

working 3 simultaneous roll-over accidents and already holding

more calls than they have officers although they would send

'em out if it's 'officer needs assistance.' Nope. Fairfax

County is already helping at the other end of town. So the

other calls took care of themselves. If left alone, false

alarms reset and combatants eventually get tired, injured, or

otherwise motivated to leave the area where they're fighting.

So the rookie gets to tell his story. He lights up the

reckless, probable DWI. As soon as the vehicle comes to a

stop, the driver gets out and charges toward rookie's car.

Rookie suspends his transmission, opens door, and orders

the driver back to his car. The suspect ignores the order

and keeps coming. A tussle ensues followed by the foot

pursiut. In his excitement, rookie misstates his location

several times and...

'Car 54, Where are you?' And it didn't compute when I called

him 'Toodie' (he wasn't even born when I was watching Muldoon

and Toodie. Oh, well. Danged hard to politely and lightly

insult a rookie when he's not old enough to understand the

jab. Rookie's fine. He was able to ID the suspect (the Lt

first arrested the guy in 1980). The Lt and I both gave our

rookie separate lectures on 'location-location-location.'

He's down at the magistrate's office getting warrants now.

All of us are thankful that it turned out OK. I hope that

our young officer will let me know where he is in the future.

Alley cat morals...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Have I mentioned that Falls Church is an expensive bedroom

community to the west of Wasnington, DC? Where a number of

elected and appointed members of the Federal government

reside and...

Well, I'm not sure I can do justice to this but I will try.

A female, wife of a government official who must remain

unnamed, for obvious reasons, calls to complain of harrassing

and annoying phone calls, a misdemeanor offense in Virginia.

The kicker? Well, she doesn't want to prosecure or even make

a formal report because the caller is her friend. Huh? Then

why are you calling? Oh, friend equals Latin lover on the

side and you don't want your husband to find out even though

he... Well, I'm sorry. If you can't make a complaint, we

can't... <grumble> But she keeps calling, pleading for some

help in stopping the calls to her home from the man who is

professing his true love for her.

Oh, I forgot to mention the 'threats by phone' that she now

wants to report. The threat? To show her husband the

photographs. Rather explicit photographs. Taken sans the

usual coverings of the dermis and including lots of physical

contact that Billary didn't consider 'sex' when under oath

but that her husband might not...

I don't think that the police can help her or her husband.

I'm going to have to get on us.gov and see where these people

are from.

If it ain't broke, don't fix it...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

During all this, the Virginia Crime Information Network (VCIN)

was down for 'software upgrades' to improve service. The

wanted and criminal history files were supposed to be back up

at midnight. It is now after 0300 and we just got the latest:

TO: ALL STATIONS

DUE TO UNFORSEEN PROBLEMS, THE VIRGINIA WANTED FILES ARE

STILL OUT OF SERVICE AND WILL BE FOR AN UNDETERMINED...

<grumble> If this is improvement, please spare me. I have a

pile of entries that need to be put in and needed histories on

the suspects in cases and... Oh, well. Day shift will have

to do my work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, there is one advantage. We have Internet access and,

since all the systems that I need to do my job are down and

the troops are at the magistrate's office or in the back

doing paperwork (or walking the dog, in the case of our K-9),

I can goof off for a few minutes and vent about the lunacy

of the night and the world in general.

Always take good care of yourself and yours,

50's not old if you're a... Tree

R J 'Tree' Greenwood

doctree@...

doctree@... on 911-Talk

Join 18 million Eudora users by signing up for a free Eudora Web-Mail account at

http://www.eudoramail.com