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I am new to this group. My name is . I am age 55, a college professor, and I live in southeast lower Michigan (not Metro Detroit).

First and foremost, thanks for the information that was sent to me when I joined. These materials have been helpful and will be put to good use.

I also apologize in advance for the length of this posting.

I was informed last Friday (April 11) that I have prostate cancer. I am scheduled for a bone scan on 4/23, a CAT scan on 4/24 and a consultation with my urologist on 4/25. After this, a consultation with a medical oncologist will be scheduled, and I am talking on an ongoing basis with my regular primary care physician. All of this is at our local hospital, which has a cancer treatment center. It is two miles from my home. Both the urologist and the medical oncologist are housed in medical office building contiguous with the cancer treatment center and hospital. My primary care physician's office is 11 miles away. The hospital (primary acute care - around 200 beds - I believe all rooms are private) is part of the Promedica System. Our community (small city) is about 25,000 people (45,000 counting contiguous townships), and the county is just under 100,000 in population. It is considered rural. The opinion of the community is that the medical care here and the quality of the physicians here is good.

Both my wife and I have Blue Cross coverage, under one of their (open) PPO options. All of the players (the docs and the hospital) are participants in the PPO.

I was referred to the urologist by my regular physician (an internist) when he felt a "flat spot" when he performed my annual DRE on February 23. I had my PSA done of March 4, and the urologist saw me shortly thereafter. After his DRE exam, he scheduled me for an ultrasound and biopsy in his office which was done on April 3. He took two samples.

The pathology report (I have a copy) reads as follows:

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Specimen(s) received:

1. Biopsy of prostate, right apex

2. Biopsy of prostate , left base

Final pathological diagnosis:

1. Biopsy of prostate, right apex: High-grade prostatic intraepithelial neoplasia

2. Biopsy of prostate, left base: Adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+4+7. Tumor involving approximately 50% of the length of the biopsy. Perineural invasion present.

Clinical history: PSA 1.43 Midline prostate nodule

Gross description:

1. Specimen is labeled "biopsy of prostate, right apex". It consists of three fragments of grayish-white tissue. They vary from 0.4x 0.05 to 0.7x0.05 cm Specimen is submitted entirely (3 sections).

2. Specimen is labeled "biopsy pf prostate, left base". It consists of a fragment of grayish-whit tissue measuring 0.6x0.05cm. Specimen is submitted entirely (1 section).

Microscopic findings:

1. Sections of biopsy of prostate from right apex reveal fragments of prostatic tissue showing focal high-grade prostatic intraepithlial neoplasia. The biopsy in one area shows a portion of gland lined by hyperchromatic epithelial cells showing prominent eosinophilic nucleoli. No invasive malignancy is present in these sections.

2. Sections of the biopsy of prostate from left base reveal adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3=4+7. Focal perineural invasion is present. The tumor is multifocal with few intervening normal prostatic glands. The tumor involves approximately 50% of the length of the biopsy.

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my PSA history is as follows (and I've had DRE's annually for the past 12 years as well).

3/4/2008 1.43

2/13/2007 1.55

1/27/2006 0.91

12/31/2004 1.13

12/19/2003 1.04

11/11/2002 1.10

10/3/2001 1.1

8/16/2000 0.7

4/9/1999 2.1 (rechecked in three months 0.7)

2/18/1998 0.8

5/10/1996 1.0

I've always had an enlarged prostate (50 cm in size, if I recall the chart on the urologists wall correctly)

In 1989 I had an ultrasound because I had recurring prostate infections during the previous couple of years. This ultrasound did not reveal any problems.

My family has a history of prostate cancer (and cancer in general). My father died at age 84 (in 1987) from metastic prostate cancer. His father also had prostate cancer, for which he received cobalt therapy in the early 1960's. My father said that when his died at age 94 (in 1963) that the autopsy showed him to be free of cancer. My mother died last year, on May 23 from colon cancer. She was age 88. A tumor was removed from her surgically in May of 1986, but it came back.

He mother died in her 80's (in the mid 1970's) from cervical cancer, and her father died in 1964 from lung cancer. He was a railroad engineer, and smoked heavily (unfiltered Camels).

Both of my parents were attorneys. I don't think anything environmental caused their illnesses.

I'm married for 32 years (again, I recently turned 55 years old). My wife is age 53. We have two children (we waited a while to have them) who are ages 18 and 11, and three bird dogs (all Brittany's). We have not told the kids anything as of yet. Other than my wife and you folks here on this list, I have only told 5 close friends (Fellow Shrine-Masons in my unit - the Highlanders).

My urologist told me, in two separate phone conversations that he is "almost certain" and he is "almost 99 percent sure" that my cancer has not spread beyond the prostate. I hope this is confirmed by both the bone scan and the CAT scan. The perineural invasion comment in the pathologist's report is very troubling to me, and although I've had lower back pain off an on for many years (treated and abated with physical therapy), I had a bad back spasm five days after my DRE in February, and the pain has lingered. This also scares me.

Clearly, given my family history, I have done my best to be vigilant about monitoring what's going on with my prostate health. I always expected that I would someday get a bad report and that it would be in time to do something to make the situation better.

With this said, I didn't expect to get such a report at age 55. This news has devastated me, and I'm pretty much of a wreck right now. I've read a lot about my type of cancer in the past few days,and the information is pretty overwhelming and discouraging. I'd appreciate hearing opinions from the folks on this list about my situation and my chances. I'm not handling the uncertainty of my situation very well. I feel that I have been given a death sentence, and that this cancer is going to kill me, and very soon. I'm feeling pretty down.

Thanks for reading. I hope to hear from some of you.