Re: So sick of stares ... to all that replied to me before

[Guest guest]

Kim,

You have a good attitude and you are doing what is right for you. I think it

is a GREAT idea to contact the media to try and get a story out educating

folks about this problem. More and more kids are having it, many are going

undetected till it is too late.

A friend of ours is now doubting their thoughts on not having their son

banded. He is nine months and I told them that it wasn't too late. If they were

really concerned to get a referral and just talk to an orthotist and see what

they say. Can't hurt, right?

Our ped didn't know about this problem till we had ... our dd went

untreated. Luckily, she is okay, but I do notice a slight misalignment with her

eyes. Most people probably don't notice it, but as a mom, I do. It bothers me

that we didn't treat her, and I ask myself why I didn't do more research on it

at the time. But you know, " hind-sight is 20/20 " and I can't dwell on that. I

am so blessed to have to beautiful, normally developing kids without serious

problems.

It's good that you decorated so soon. I didn't and it seemed so bad. Then I

did and it got better for us (at least I guess I learned to ignore people).

Some people can be terribly rude and ignorant when it comes to certain things.

You expect kids to stare but never adults. I don't care... I just think " Their

mother should have raised them better. "

I have such a newfound appreciation for parents who go through this with kids

who have serious problems. It doesn't bother me when people ask why

has a helmet, I like explaining. So when my dd makes a comment about why someone

is in a wheelchair, I just tell her I don't know why, you'll have to ask

them. Sometimes she does and they don't ever seem to mind talking about it

either.

Hang in there, girlfriend! And like someone mentioned before... you can

always vent to us!!!

Hugs,

Deidre

momma to

STARband

[Guest guest]

I think that it bothers me so much because people would stop before

he had the helmet and talk to him, tickle him, smile at him, say how

cute he is. Now they just look weird at him.

I have it decorated (changed the stickers twice now) in Christmas

stickers. I have lights (stickers of course) strung all around the

top, have presents, a nativity scene, santa, snowmen, puppies in

santa hats... and I ADORE him in. I think he looks so dang cute. At

home, I don't notice it at all (unless of course I'm holding him and

I SMELL his cute head). When we go out, I notice because of THEM.

I want people to see him the same as I do... w/o the helmet. I don't

interact with him any different than I did before the helmet - I

smile, play with him, etc.

I don't give two rips what people think of me, just of my children.

He's adorable in it - makes him my mini-hockey player (which is what

we are decorating it with next, all 30 NHL teams). I just want more

people to know about it - and if they dont ask, I cant just speak up.

Maybe I need to just ask them when they stare if they would like to

know why he wears it.

The problem with that is Jax's dad thinks I should just ingore them

all together - not say anything at all. I want them to know though.

Deidre, I agree, we are lucky that it's only a short while that our

babies have to wear these. I am thankful every day for that (for

awhile there we thought he was going to be deaf in one ear).

Thanks all for the support - maybe in time I'll get used to it.

Kim

> Kim,

>

> I know it's hard, we're all going through it. You know, after

awhile, I

> forget he's wearing it until we go out in public and people stare,

then I remember!

> It's so hard when we want to protect our children from others who

would cause

> them harm. Are you upset that they will bother Jax or are you upset

that you

> are embarrassed?

>

> Don't worry about Jax. He has no idea what is going on and won't

ever mind

> people staring. I'm sure he thinks they are being friendly.

just smiles

> when people stare at him and then they think he looks cute.

>

> Stickers truely do help with making people more comfortable with

the helmet.

> It actually I think has helped people feel more comfortable asking

what's it's

> for. I've heard questions like " Does he have seizures? " , " Does he

bang his

> head? " , " Is it in case he falls? " , " Was he in a bad accident? " NO

ONE thinks you

> are a bad parent for getting your child a helmet. In fact, if they

think

> about it, you are a great parent for getting one. You cared enough

to purchase it

> and make him wear it.

>

> If you are embarrassed you will get over it -- eventually. Don't

let other

> people's rudeness govern how you raise your child. If the doctor's

feel the

> helmet is necessary for Jax (and they must since he has one) then

it's something

> you will need to try to get past for his sake. You don't want your

child

> growing up without the correction he needs and deserves. You are a

wonderful parent

> for being brave enough to go forward with it, don't let ignorant

people hurt

> your son by making you take it off.

>

> We are all here with you, Kim. We are all great parents who care

enough for

> our children to see this thing through. Hang in there... remember,

it's not

> forever! Imagine those parents who have children in wheelchairs,

permanent

> helmets or prosthetics. We have it so much easier! Ours is only for

a few months...

> whereas their's is for life.

>

> Wishing you many blessings,

> Deidre

> momma to

> STARband