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[Guest guest]

I have been reading a bit on here but I find the setup of the

messages confusing, anyways decided to post.

So here it is, alot of garbage about me, and at the bottom is some

question/comments for those that dont want to read to much.

Alittle over 2 months ago I saw some show on tv about a guy who is

very good with numbers, sorry cant remember the name. In the show they

mention some stuff about him being autistic. Needless to say I started

researching as soon as the show was over.

The reason for this is that time I had been watching shows about alot

of famous people(like dead famous) and both myself and my wife found

it interesting that the discriptions of these people sounded like me.

Around this time I also saw an artical about autism, the only form I

knew of at the time lower functioning, and assumed that was the only

kind, and again I noticed I am alot like autistics.

As always I was very sceptical, I dont listen to anyone but myself,

if I dont a normaly fall for a trick and that has cost me alot of

money in the past. So I was looking at signs and symptoms, looking for

anything that would be key in me not having it. Page after page, site

after site, I just kept finding more and more info about me. Things

all my life that my family noticed and some that only I knew (many of

these didnt even notice I was doing)

Ok so now I know why I am the way I am.

About 1 month ago I looked into what the signs and symptoms of

anxiety are. I had read of possible pills and theropy fo treatment and

read that it was common for autistics. What I read shocked me. heres

why, I live in an area with very VERY poor medical facilities. Doctors

here are the big city rejects basicly. When I was about 5, during

rehersal for the christmas show for my kintergarden class I passed

out, the school nurse assumed diabetes and gave me sugar, and I was

fine after a bit of time was back up like nothing had happened. Few

days later it happened again, again during rehearsal for the show. So

my parents took me to ever doctor in the area, I kept getting sick and

all the doctors thought it was low blood sugar problems (my

grandfather had them... or so we thought at the time) yet couldnt

catch my sugar being low ever.

So 19 years later, after 19 years of suffering from sever migraines

weekly, which caused me to miss out on a lot of the things I loved to

do, made me fail tests in school, miss work, and a long list of other

things I find out that I have an anxiety and sensory overload problem.

3weeks now and I only got one very minor headache. What I thought was

funny was that I figured out how to make the migraines hurt less

without having any idea what I was doing. Basicly my family new that

if I had a headache I needed a dark, cold room, void of any noise or

vibration, they didnt know I also rocked because I never did it in

front of them.

So I suffered because the doctors here are useless, and my

grandfather. My family didn't find the things I did all that odd

because my grandfather did all the same odd things.

Its nice to finaly have a way of making people understand now that I

am not mean, that I am not trying to be a pain, that I am not trying

to be rude.

So often I was accused of being picky, bitchy or whiny. When I would

complain about clocks ticking everyone assumed I was just being a pain

because they didnt notice it(of course they never questioned the fact

I could tell if a television was on from the other end of a house,

providing it wasnt getting a signal.. damned high pitch noises..).

woops talked a bit much about myself as always, sorry but its nice to

say this stuff to people that understand. I have really enjoyed

reading these messages because I dont have to feel like something is

wrong with me anymore.

Ok now for my questions.

Did anyone else find a connection with lower functioning autisics

before knowing you where?

For the longest time I swore that there was nothing wrong with

autistics. That people where looking at them like they had mental

handicap like down syndrome, for me I always felt what autistics had

was mental strenght, just not one we could understand. I always felt

very comfortable around them.

Does anyone have a problem with animals and/or small children acting

odd around you?

All my life young children have followed me around and stared at me,

doesnt matter if they have never seen me before or see me every day.

Only seems to affect children under 3, after that they normaly dont

care what I am doing. I have come to the conclusion that small

children see/sense/whatever things that adults/older children dont,

perhaps they see me as just a really big kid...

Animals, Anytime I go to someones house that has a dog I get the dog

in trouble, they refuse to leave me alone. Cats, dogs, cows,

domesticated and wild all either wont leave me alone or show no signs

of fear of me. I know this is odd, my family has always found it odd

about me, maybe it is just me.

From some of my readings it seems some autistics react in odd ways to

medication. Is this true?

For me pain killers dont work, or I have to be given the maximum human

dosage to get an effect and even if it works its normaly not for very

long. Sleep medication or anything that makes a person drowsy makes me

drowsy for as much as 24 hours after I take it. I have always assumed

it was just me, just wondering if there is a link to autism.

Whats everyones thought on medication for treatment?

I personly hate medication. Always felt most everything is what you

make up in your head as far as problems go. I dont like the idea of

any drug that will make me not me. I do hate public gathers, going to

places like walmart makes me sick.

Does anyone here play MMORPGs?

I ask this because I can not function in real life with more then 2

to 3 people around me I know very well, 1 person around me I dont know

is about all I can stand at anytime. But playing online games I am all

around people, chatting with them and love it, never feel out of place

or odd. Can talk to as many people as are willing to talk with me and

never bothers me, just found it odd.

Been with my wife now for 3 years, married for 4 months. Now that I

understand what my problem is I am learning to avoid what makes my

head hurt. Part of what has been helping me is just saying what I am

thinking instead of a tempting to find the correct NT answer. My wife

is having a hard time adjusting, I have always been rather blunt but I

tried to tone it down a bit. She is enjoying that I am a happier

person now, feel better and do better when family are around, but now

that I dont think as hard about what I am saying I hurt her feeling a

lot. The best answer for her that I could come up with so far is to

not ask me questions she doesn't want the truth to, Like " Do I look

fat? " when she herself thinks she does. As well as questions like " Do

you regret doing/not doing (insert some random thing here that would

mean we wouldn't have met)? " Any help here would be awesome, and I am

sure she would love it.

Again sorry for rambling, I dont have anyone to talk to that truely

understands me or that wont just tell me to take some stupid pills or

get some theropy so I can fake being something I am not. In otherwords

I needed somewhere to unload a lot of thoughts in a place I wont get

strung up for saying, god forbid people tell the truth.