Re: Homecare for the Holidays

[Guest guest]

Thank you for sharing - will save to the Links

>

> Homecare for the Holidays

> by Edyth Ann Knox

> (Published by ElderCare Online http://www.ec-online.net)

>

> The Holidays are times of great joy, feasting and family traditions that fill

us

> with secure and warm feelings. They are times to reestablish family ties and

> bonds. The Holidays are days we remember and cherish for years to come.

>

> Yet for those caring for a family member with Alzheimer's Disease the Holidays

> can be filled with trips to the doctor or the emergency room. They can be

times

> that our loved one may show frustration, agitation or aggressive behaviors,

> instead of being filled with joy and good will. This can destroy the Holidays

> for the caregiver and the rest of the family. Many caregivers often cease

> participating in the Holidays altogether after a horrendous holiday.

>

> The Holidays are times that can bring great stress for many. When you add a

> loved one who has Alzheimer's Disease into the mix often the stress can become

> too much for both the caregiver and the loved one. You do not need to dread

the

> arrival of the Holidays. There are ways you can still celebrate the season by

> making adjustments and considerations to improve your chance of a safe and

happy

> holiday for both you and your loved one.

>

> The Parties

>

> Many times the Holidays provide too much stimulation and commotion for our

loved

> ones to be able to deal with. This can cause them to become more disoriented

and

> agitated. There are things we can do that will help make it less stressful on

> our loved ones and ourselves:

>

> Seeing family during the Holidays is a great joy to us and our loved ones.

> However, large noisy groups are too much for our loved ones to handle and

create

> too much stress for the caregiver, especially if she is the hostess. Keep the

> visits to smaller groups of about a dozen for shorter periods of time. Provide

> your loved one with a quiet room where he can go to if things become too much.

> Do not try to force visiting on him.

>

> Any time the caregiver feels overwhelmed the individual with Alzheimer's

Disease

> " picks it up " and tends to act on it. Minimize your own stress by resisting

the

> impulse or sense of obligation to host the " perfect " Holiday party. Suggest

that

> another relative host the family party this year, or invite one or two

relatives

> over early to help you prepare the dinner and assist with hosting.

>

> Provide little children with a separate area where the individual with

> Alzheimer's Disease does not normally go. Television and video games – with

> their noise and movement – are often very distracting and disconcerting to the

> individual with Alzheimer's Disease. Place the television and other noise

makers

> in the children's area and limit the volume.

>

> Traveling and visiting with the loved one is generally heartbreaking. The

> farther along in the disease your loved one is the harder visiting at someone

> else's place is for them. If you do decide to take your loved one visiting be

> prepared to go home early. Strange places and the confinement of traveling and

> visiting can be too much to handle. If you go to visit:

>

> Pack a bag for your loved one even if we were going to be there only for a

short

> period. Bring a change or two of clothing, extra adult diapers, a favorite or

> familiar object for her to carry and hold. I also made sure I had wash cloths,

> her soap, her own cup and whatever I needed for any situation. I would even

take

> this bag with us when we went to the doctor's office.

>

> If the car ride is more than 15 minutes, pack snacks like apples, carrots and

> cookies for your loved one to eat in the car.

> When you get there, lead your loved one to an area where she can visit with a

> small group out of the main traffic of activities. Your loved one may enjoy

> visiting and seeing children, but she may act differently in the middle of it

at

> a strange place.

>

> You may enjoy a family event without your loved one present. Don't feel guilty

> about taking some time away so that you can relax and socialize. Find a sitter

> or home care aide to watch your loved one for a half-day.

>

> Most Holidays involve an abundance of food, especially sweets. Many

individuals

> with Alzheimer's Disease have a big sweet tooth. Unfortunately, many people

with

> dementia can not tell when to stop enjoying the goodies and can eat themselves

> to a point of getting sick.

>

> - Allow your loved one access to some treats.

> - Do not place large amounts of goodies out at one time. Instead place smaller

> portions.

> - Include healthful treats such as carrots, celery sticks and pieces of cut up

> fresh vegetables and fruits. This allows your loved one more variety and some

> better snacks than all the sweets. You can place out a small tray of cookies

and

> sweets at different times of the day for all to enjoy.

>

> Holiday Decorations

>

> Decorations can cause confusion and safety hazards for an individual with

> Alzheimer's Disease. Follow common sense and standard fire prevention tips. To

> minimize disruptions in your loved one's routine, keep the decorations as much

> to one room or area as possible

>

> Avoid breakable decorations or small ornaments. Your loved one came become

> delighted with shiny and pretty decorations. Many times they are so delighted

> they pick them up and try hiding them. Some individuals with Alzheimer's

Disease

> become very tactile and must touch everything, so stay away from all those

> pretty glass ornaments and decorations.

>

> Avoid things with small parts that can cause choking because many individuals

> with Alzheimer's Disease try to put things in their mouths. Use the " Toilet

> Paper Roll Test: " If you can put the object down the tube of a roll of toilet

> paper, keep it well out of reach.

> Electrical decorations also present a risk to our loved ones. Turn on the

lights

> on the tree only when the family or someone is in the room to ensure that your

> loved one does not fiddle with bulbs or break the wiring and expose himself to

> the risk of grabbing bare wiring. Battery powered decorations may be safer.

>

> Be aware that animated or human form decorations may alternately delight or

> frighten the individual with Alzheimer's Disease. Those jolly Santa Claus

> puppets may become chatty companions for your loved one, or very frightening,

> especially at night or in shadowy lighting.

> Lighted candles should not be left unattended. Scented candles with hot liquid

> wax may appear appetizing to a person with Alzheimer's Disease, but can cause

> skin burns or a fire.

>

> Move furniture as little as possible when setting up the decorations and the

> tree at Christmas. Change your loved one's normal walking area as little as

> possible and keep it clear of obstacles.

> Winter Safety

>

> Most of our Holidays happen during the colder months. Our loved ones are at an

> age where they get chilled much easier. They tend to feel every draft and even

> though we feel warm and cozy they are often cold. Dressing them warmer can be

of

> great benefit. If possible, keep your loved one's room a degree or two warmer

> than the rest of the house. We chose a space heater that looked like the old

> fashion radiator. The added benefit of this heater was that I could use it to

> warm her clothing before I put them on her.

>

> There is the additional risk to a Loved One with chances of them getting out

of

> the door unobserved, especially when there is an increase in activity. Once

out

> the door the dangers to your loved one increases.

>

> Place bells or a door alarm on all doors leading outside can help alert you

when

> your loved one may be leaving the house.

> Dress your loved one in clothing that can easily be recognized helps to spot a

> wanderer from a distance or in a group.

> - Give an early present of a " Safe Return " bracelet to aid in having your

Loved

> One returned if found alone.

> - Keep your walkways and drives as clear of snow and ice as much as possible.

>

> Write Your Own Sanity Clause

>

> You can make adjustments in Holiday routines to make the season more enjoyable

> for both the individual with Alzheimer's Disease and the yourself. Spending

time

> with family and friends is often important for both of you. Remember that you

> are entitled to have a good time spending time with your family during these

> visits.

>

> Make yourself some promises this Holiday season:

>

> - I will take quality time for myself. You deserve time away from your loved

> one. This is not selfish. You have your own identity and interests. Nurture

> them.

> - I am not Superman/Superwoman. You can not provide unlimited care to your

loved

> one. You have limits. Acknowledging those limits helps reduce your anxiety and

> improve your loved ones quality of life.

> - I will take proactive steps to reduce my stress level. You should reduce

large

> stressors in your life as well as the stressors that come up at this time of

> year. Consider starting a sensible exercise program such as walking regularly.

> Consult with your health care provider to find the best program for you.

> - I will spend only what I can afford. If you must cut back, cut back and make

> no excuses for your situation. Stop exchanging gifts with people you don't

like.

> My friend Tom says, " Maybe it's time to assertively and gently give someone a

> piece of your mind instead of your wallet. " You will feel unburdened – this is

a

> great gift to give yourself.

> - I will share the care with other family members. Don't be embarrassed or

> ashamed to ask other family members to help monitor and care for your loved

one.

> At the same time, do not push the tasks onto them with feelings of guilt. This

> is an opportunity for others to see the type of loving care you provide every

> day as well as an opportunity for them to have the positive aspects of

> caregiving.

> - I will strive to understand my negative feelings and emotions. Learn about

> them and think of ways that you can start to change your situation in the

> future. Confronting these emotions will make powerful and lasting changes in

> your life. Do you need to speak with a professional counselor, trusted friend

or

> religious advisor?

> - I will enjoy myself, but in moderation. Identify why you are drinking more,

> smoking more, cursing more or overeating. Even if you can't stop yourself, at

> least identify why you're " acting out. "

> - I will not inflate my expectations of the season. Often we set ourselves up

> for disappointment by imagining the perfect Walton's Christmas. The perfect

> Holiday is one where you feel loved and share your love with others.

>

> Related Articles

>

> - Stress Management: Tips and Techniques

> - Identifying and Reducing Stress in Your Life

> - Caring for the Caregiver: Promoting Your Own Well Being

> - Strategies for Managing Stress Skill Builder

> - Don't Feel Guilty!

> - Understanding and Acknowledging Negative Emotions

> - Overcoming Negative Emotions

>

> " Write Your Own Sanity Clause " was written by Rich O'Boyle and J.

> Schumacher Psy.D., R-C.S.W. Tom is a practicing psychologist in Hicksville,

N.Y.

> He specializes in individual, couples and marital counseling.

>