Re: Speaking of Time.......

[Guest guest]

grace

I watched that show also. I wanted to write Barbara Walters and tell her how

easy those parents have it. I think about writing Montel almost

every day and telling him be honest with those parents... tell them they

screwed up. It just seems like all these NT kids are forced to grow up so

fast. Everything is so expensive now a days cause it has to do more, be

faster - why can't we slow down and enjoy life?

All we want is our kids to be kids ... damn it!!!!!!!!!

G

[Guest guest]

well, I'M speechless...

beautifully put, Grace.

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

--- Grace Keh wrote:

Every moment counts. And whenever possible, I intend

to remember that. Every single moment.

Grace<

Amen to that.

Tuna

=====

" Blessed is the influence of one true loving

human soul on another. "

- Eliot

______________________________________________________________________

Web-hosting solutions for home and business! http://website.yahoo.ca

[Guest guest]

Now if every parent in the world could read what you just wrote, what a

wonderful place our world would be.

This one's great Grace. It really, really is....

Penny :-)

[Guest guest]

Salli

Enrique, 14, AS, TS

, 12, NT

Sophia, 7, NT

Xavier, aka PUTTER!, 5, autism

o, 2, NT

Re: Speaking of Time.......

> grace

>

> I watched that show also. I wanted to write Barbara Walters and tell her

how

> easy those parents have it. I think about writing Montel almost

> every day and telling him be honest with those parents... tell them they

> screwed up. It just seems like all these NT kids are forced to grow up so

> fast. Everything is so expensive now a days cause it has to do more, be

> faster - why can't we slow down and enjoy life?

>

> All we want is our kids to be kids ... damn it!!!!!!!!!

>

> G

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Yeeeeeeeeeeeees?

LOL

Re: Speaking of Time.......

Salli

Enrique, 14, AS, TS

, 12, NT

Sophia, 7, NT

Xavier, aka PUTTER!, 5, autism

o, 2, NT

Re: Speaking of Time.......

> grace

>

> I watched that show also. I wanted to write Barbara Walters and tell her

how

> easy those parents have it. I think about writing Montel almost

> every day and telling him be honest with those parents... tell them they

> screwed up. It just seems like all these NT kids are forced to grow up so

> fast. Everything is so expensive now a days cause it has to do more, be

> faster - why can't we slow down and enjoy life?

>

> All we want is our kids to be kids ... damn it!!!!!!!!!

>

> G

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

> Yeeeeeeeeeeeees?

>

> LOL

Putter sent the blank email. Sorry. I chased him back to his nature

encyclopedia.

Salli

[Guest guest]

I'm betting Salli's non-email was the work of the Evil Mr. Putt!!! Putter, go

play on your computer, and leave Mommy's alone!!

" Penny " wrote:

>Yeeeeeeeeeeeees?

>

>LOL

>

> Re: Speaking of Time.......

>

>

>

>Salli

>

>Enrique, 14, AS, TS

>, 12, NT

>Sophia, 7, NT

>Xavier, aka PUTTER!, 5, autism

>o, 2, NT

>

>

> Re: Speaking of Time.......

>

>

>> grace

>>

>> I watched that show also. I wanted to write Barbara Walters and tell her

>how

>> easy those parents have it. I think about writing Montel almost

>> every day and telling him be honest with those parents... tell them they

>> screwed up. It just seems like all these NT kids are forced to grow up so

>> fast. Everything is so expensive now a days cause it has to do more, be

>> faster - why can't we slow down and enjoy life?

>>

>> All we want is our kids to be kids ... damn it!!!!!!!!!

>>

>> G

>>

>>

>>

>>

>>

>>

>>

[Guest guest]

Wow!! Grace, that was soooo well said.

Tamara

--- Grace Keh wrote:

>

>

> I was watching 20/20 the other night. The first

> segment I caught was of a

> set of parents, absolutely losing it with their 5

> year old son. Hidden

> cameras all over the house, and they were probably

> on their best behavior

> and STILL yelling, swearing, and losing it. The kid

> was undoubtedly active,

> but he was just the cutest thing, and really - --

> just a 5 year old regular

> kid. Smart, friendly, cheerful, but independent and

> willful. A parenting

> guru had to come out and tell the parents how to

> parent that child.

> Guaranteed, there is not one amongst us who could

> not parent that child, who

> could not adore that kid. The mother was on the

> verge of tears, explaining

> how hard it was for her to parent this child. I

> actually started

> laughing... and I wasn't laughing at her. I was

> laughing at me.... and the

> positive knowledge I have that *I* COULD raise that

> boy. Eyes closed, hands

> tied. All of us could - - I'd bet on it.

>

> The next segment was about a couple who had lost

> their 4 year old son due to

> an unexpected accident during an operation. 14

> years later, or something,

> they still could not get over the loss and move on,

> so they asked a forensic

> artist to reproduce what that child would look like

> today. He did, and they

> saw it. Mom was naturally moved to tears, but the

> one who sobbed was dad.

> The morning of the surgery, he had tugged the little

> boy by the ear to get

> him up, and that was the last interaction he had

> with his son.... a fight.

> For 14 years, that was all he could think of. I

> started crying for this

> one. I do not want to do that.

>

> On a daily basis - these kids do so much to get

> scolded for. Like I said

> earlier, I don't know how much is autism, how much

> is bad behavior, but they

> do have to get scolded here and there. On the other

> hand, these kids do so

> much to endanger their lives. Run out the front

> door, jump off high places,

> climb to the ends of the earth, run into things,

> etc. Accidents happen to

> anyone, and our children are even more vulnerable

> than any other person who

> is aware of societal rules or common sense (drop

> from roof, you die....).

> We could lose these kids.... any second, any day...

> at any moment. Nobody

> warned us they were coming. Nobody will warn us

> before taking them.

>

> All I could think was that I could never forgive

> myself, or live with myself

> if the last moment I remember with my children who

> are here for an

> undetermined amount of time was my yelling at them.

> After all we have been

> through, after all the torture they have been

> through on account of autism,

> after all the fear they must have felt being in such

> a strange place as our

> planet - - - I could not live for one more day if I

> knew that I had spent

> the last moment of my child's life, yelling at her,

> or being anything but

> absolutely loving to her. To both of them. All of

> us try to make our

> bedtime rituals pleasant.... we all kiss our

> children goodnight, forgive and

> forget for tomorrow... and make that moment count.

> But nothing tells us

> that something will take them in the night. Every

> single moment of every

> single day stands a chance of being our last with

> these children. Kids who

> haven't been able to communicate throughout their

> stay with us.... kids who

> reamed their heads into sharp objects from sheer

> frustration during their

> stay with us.... kids who love us and yet can't be

> like us..... kids who

> have made us grow up and understand their hearts,

> their way of being, their

> differences, and to love them despite of it, because

> of it.......kids who

> spent their whole lives being medicated and helped

> in ways that no human

> being should have to be, never mind children.....

> kids who try so hard to

> learn something so simple, all because it's the way

> of this world...........

> I do not want to imagine a last moment with them.

> Even though I hate my

> life on some days - -even though I'd like to run

> away - - I do not want a

> last day with these children. Lest I run away, I

> want to be able to come

> back. I want them to be here, like it or not.

> Right by me, where they

> should be.

>

> My children are nearing age four. Nobody can

> possibly know just how

> shocking that is to me.... or maybe we all know.

> Time actually flies.

> There is no way I have raised these children for

> four years. It hasn't all

> been fun, and yet it's all gone by so quickly

> anyhow. Four years. Do this

> nine more times and they are 40 years old. Doing

> this nine more times is

> not that long.

>

> I feel rushed. Rushed to love them, rushed to get

> them to learn, function

> and survive. Rushed to make them feel happy, and

> make them see that this

> isn't such a bad place to be, that they will be

> okay. Even if I live to see

> them as 40 year olds, there is just not enough time,

> it seems. Or so it

> feels.

> So often, we worry about what will happen to our

> children once we leave.

> We'll never know until it happens.... but it's clear

> that all that matters

> to us, and should matter to us is what we do while

> we're here with them.

> Getting them services - - important. Making them

> better - - important. So

> many things are important, but in the grand scheme

> of things - - making

> every moment count is all that matters.

>

> Every moment counts. And whenever possible, I

> intend to remember that.

> Every single moment.

> Grace

>

>

>

>

__________________________________________________