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***Update on me- a few bad words***

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Hi All,

I havent been able to get to the doctor yet... my doctor wasnt in

on saturday, and I couldnt drive myself to the doctors. My doctor

didnt even call me back about my pain untill this morning... which

pisses me off because this whole weekend I was in severe pain and

had no way to get help because my mom was sick so I didnt want her

to watch cause then he will get sick and he is just getting

better after being sick for over a month. Oh and now my doctor wont

be in the office today because she is sick... so I might be out

another day with out any meds... I cant go to another doctor because

they dont understand or listen to me when I explain my pain. My pain

is so bad that even morphine plus percocet doesnt touch it.... but

the doctors think I am lying.... ... And now I am an emotional wreck

because my doc took me off of my anti depresants on top of

everything. So now I am a big pile of tears and pain. I cant handle

this... I am serious... it is getting to the point that if my doctor

doesnt start helping me I am going to have to start smoking weed

again to take the edge off so I can get things done... and not be so

bitchy when it comes to taking care of my son... I feel like if it

wasnt for the fact that I have a responcibility to raise my son, and

be here for him I am seriously hurting so bad I would end it! No

joke..... but I could never do that... I know what it is like to

grow up with out a parent and I wont do that to him. But there is

only so much a person can take before it just kills them. Im going

to go crazy... shoot I think I already am... with the halicinations

and what not. My boyfriend comes to my house tomorrow so things will

be a bit better because if I cant get in to see a doc today they

will get me in tomorrow... and he can baby sit if needed. Anyways I

better get going... Thank you all for caring about me, and checking

on me.

Love,

ka

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I can relate you having pain so bad you want to take poison. But

that is a permanent remedy and your job here isn't done yet.

Sometimes meditation works for me. Kind of a visualization

technique. Worth a try anyway. (self hypnosis) Can you take a nice

hot bath and soak for awhile? Can you get someone to give you a

massage? Get rip roaring drunk (but get a sitter for your child

first).

Ruthie

>

> Hi All,

> I havent been able to get to the doctor yet... my doctor wasnt

in

> on saturday, and I couldnt drive myself to the doctors. My doctor

> didnt even call me back about my pain untill this morning... which

> pisses me off because this whole weekend I was in severe pain and

> had no way to get help because my mom was sick so I didnt want her

> to watch cause then he will get sick and he is just getting

> better after being sick for over a month. Oh and now my doctor

wont

> be in the office today because she is sick... so I might be out

> another day with out any meds... I cant go to another doctor

because

> they dont understand or listen to me when I explain my pain. My

pain

> is so bad that even morphine plus percocet doesnt touch it.... but

> the doctors think I am lying.... ... And now I am an emotional

wreck

> because my doc took me off of my anti depresants on top of

> everything. So now I am a big pile of tears and pain. I cant

handle

> this... I am serious... it is getting to the point that if my

doctor

> doesnt start helping me I am going to have to start smoking weed

> again to take the edge off so I can get things done... and not be

so

> bitchy when it comes to taking care of my son... I feel like if it

> wasnt for the fact that I have a responcibility to raise my son,

and

> be here for him I am seriously hurting so bad I would end it! No

> joke..... but I could never do that... I know what it is like to

> grow up with out a parent and I wont do that to him. But there is

> only so much a person can take before it just kills them. Im going

> to go crazy... shoot I think I already am... with the

halicinations

> and what not. My boyfriend comes to my house tomorrow so things

will

> be a bit better because if I cant get in to see a doc today they

> will get me in tomorrow... and he can baby sit if needed. Anyways

I

> better get going... Thank you all for caring about me, and

checking

> on me.

>

> Love,

> ka

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>

> And now I am an emotional wreck

> because my doc took me off of my anti depresants on top of

> everything. So now I am a big pile of tears and pain. I cant handle

> this... I am serious... it is getting to the point that if my

doctor

> doesnt start helping me I am going to have to start smoking weed

> again to take the edge off so I can get things done... and not be

so

> bitchy when it comes to taking care of my son...

ka:

I'm so very sorry to hear all you're going through. I can't imagine

being in your shoes right now. {{{{{ka}}}}}}

I just wanted to comment on above - please tell me your doc didn't

take you off antidepressants cold turkey! That is about the worse

thing you can do - you need to wean yourself off of them, and even

still, they can cause this emotional uproar you're feeling. If you

did go cold turkey, I hope you will be able to talk to your doc about

it. Even the information inserts on ADs tell you not to do that.

I'm glad you're back with us, so to speak, and hope we can help you

through these rough spots.

I'll be thinking of you and wishing you strength during this

difficult time.

XOXO

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Hi ka,

I'm so sorry your feeling so rotten. I know how it is when you have a child depending on you. It's a double edged sword, so to speak. On the one hand it's so painful just to breath and on the other there's this sweet child who needs his mommy. I've been there many a time. Your in my prayers today even tho I'm late in posting this. Why did your doctor take you off antidepressants?

That seems like a terrible things to do. Is he going to try you on another one? Sometimes I just don't understand.

Blessings,

Kathleen in NC

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