Re: Christmas Question's

[Guest guest]

> What does everyone have planned for Christmas?

My boyfriend and I are starting the celebration a little early. We are

having a Christmas party at my house this weekend, 18th. We've got us

and 5 other couples that are coming. Going to cook a bunch of food,

everyone is bringing a gift and we are going to play Dirty Santa,

dance, cut up and just have a good time.

I have to work all day on Christmas Eve so our family schedule will be

a little off this year. Christmas Day me and the kids will spend it at

home. We will open presents and then cook a big breakfast together,

usually pancakes and sausage. Then we just spend the rest of the day

at home together, playing with all the new christmas stuff.

The 26th we will probably go to my Mom's for christmas with her and my

dad, my sister, her husband and their three kids (8, 7, and 5). My

daughter is spending the week between Christmas and New Year's with my

parents because I am going on a little mini-vacation down to spend the

week with the guy I am seeing. (He lives 4 hours south of me in

Louisiana). She used to go to her Dad's after Christmas but as of last

year she has refused to visit him anymore so she just stays with my

parents. My son will probably go back up to school early, esp if he

gets this part time job he is wanting.

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> Do you have family traditions?

We have a lot of family traditions lol I think my favorite is that on

Christmas Eve me and the kids always have a " picnic " in the living

room floor...we fix all kinds of finger foods for dinner and we sit in

there and watch christmas movies with each other.

Just my two cents worth

N.

[Guest guest]

> What does everyone have planned for Christmas?

We don't have any money for gifts this year so we aren't doing

anything. At first that didn't bother me--we've had to do that

before--but my h had to participate in giving money at work for his

bosses' gifts--$50!!!!--so it seems strange to me to give $50 to buy

the company owners each a gift but not each other. I don't know,

sometimes not much makes sense to me, I think I'm becoming bitter.

We have to pay upfront for my meds so maybe I shouldn't be spending

money we may not have, though, wanting to get my h something.

We are having dinner at my parents' house on Christmas Day. It

should be interesting, as I am VERY different from my family of

origin. I usually end up feeling very isolated because we are so

different, sometimes their shallowness really bugs me. Actually it

saddens me, because I want more for them. My sister's husband is a

nice guy and could have been really good for her, but she has taught

him how to treat her(he was " too good " to her, she felt) and he is

now just " okay " , no better than any other guy. My brother has a

nice wife but he is a jerk to her a lot, he is too much like our

father. And then my parents are always fun to watch together--NOT!

But we haven't been to one of the dinners in a couple of years so I

guess we're due to attend. It's a mixed-up family, with a painful

history that everyone tries to pretend doesn't exist. Some people

are better at that delusion than others. It's just so painful, we

don't have anything in common and they don't understand me or my

interests at all. " Painful " , that is a good word for it.

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> Do you have family traditions?

My husband and I were waiting to have children to start any. I

haven't even put up a Christmas tree in years, because it just

wasn't fun anymore. I collected Christmas ornaments but they

stopped bringing me joy. I've been waiting until we had children to

start putting the tree up again, to see it through their eyes.

Since it's a big question mark if we will have any children, I guess

we should get started looking for new traditions of our own to

start, just for us.

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> What is your favorite Christmas memory?

Drawing a big blank, isn't that sad? Usually my dad had to pitch a

fit and ruin every holiday, and there was the dreading of

the " family " (his family) gathering later that day. His mother could

ruin any day and his brother would stink up the house with cigarette

smoke, and my cousins were a good bit younger than I was. Mostly I

tried to hide in my room, just the same as any other day.

Whew, isn't that cheery? My husband and I have come up w/ a

Thanksgiving celebration but so far really haven't done much for a

Christmas one. Mostly we have spent the day quietly together, no BS

or drama--there is a lot to be said for that.

Sorry this is a depressing-sound way to celebrate, we just haven't

felt too much like celebrating. Losing 2 babies in 1 year took a

lot of the wind out of our sails. Yes, we are thankful to still

have each other, but I still feel so strongly that someone is

missing. I can't explain it any better than that, I don't think.

Lily

[Guest guest]

Ooh, ooh, just thought of a good Christmas memory, it probably does

rank up there as a favorite:

After I left my 1st husband, my dr told me I had a brain tumor and

it was a long 2 weeks until I could have an MRI and get the

results. That gave me time to think, and really brought home the

question, " What would you want to do if you only had 6 months to

live? " The scan came back as no brain tumor but I was now

determined to go to Europe. I have always been interested in other

cultures and languages and wanted to go to Europe. As soon as my

divorce was final (despite being only 23 when I left him and we had

nothing to fight over, my ex dragged it out for a year), I quit my

job, put everything I owned into storage, and left the country. My

favorite time of year has always been winter--unfortunately, now the

cold bothers my fibromyalgia, so that season isn't as fun anymore--

and I would be able to see how other countries celebrated the

holidays. That was probably the best thing I have ever done for

myself.

On Christmas Day I called my mother. I was having a lot of fun, I

could go anywhere I wanted and the only determining factors were

what time the train left and how quickly I could pack. I was seeing

things I had never even dreamed of, going places I had never heard

of. My mother asked, " Aren't you lonely? " I told her not really,

that there were people in the hostels if I wanted to talk to

someone. (Winter here is the Australian summertime, so there were a

number of Australians in the hostels at the time.) Then I could

hear my father griping in the background and she said, " You're

right, you're probably having the best day of all of us. He's on a

tear, as usual. "