I am a stupid jerk! Vent

[Guest guest]

Yesterday when my eye turn red and became terribly painful I was told to go

to the ER but didn't go. I then made an appoinment to see an optomitrist but

when we got there I was too scared to go in.My husband thinks I am crazy and

all we have been doing is fighting. BUt I am tired of going in to see a Dr

when I am hurting and then being told I'm crazy so I was afraid, of that

happening again. so here I am again day2 with a red eye that gives me a

headache, eye pain and hurts my cheek (but no gooop like in pink eye) . I

feel like crap but have to take my dog to obedienceschool (He's hopefully

graduating), the little dog to get groommed and my husband is going to

Providence to find out his fate of his job. All this and I still don't know

what to do for my eye or whether or not I'm damaging by letting it hurt as

much as it does. The only place I can go is the ER since my primary is on

vacation and I can't get a referral. Any ideas for self care? Like I said it

is basically just red and slightly swollen. Hurts alot and periodically the

muscles lock so it won't move. Please someone respond. Since I freaked out

abosaid ut this last night my husband has declared it a taboo subject and he

tried to help me by driving me to the optomtrist in the mall. I want him to

understand I am scared. I want him to hold my hand. I am tired of going

through life alone and in pain. Off to doggie school. PLease send good

thoughts that Jeter doesn't act up. Last night becasue of our fighting (I

think) Jeter went and pe-ed on every bed. That includes dog beds!. This is

all way to much for me. BTW My brother a non-eds person has back pain so he

is getting an MRI. I have had daily back pain that is not controlled by

oxycontin since my accident in January. All the Dr'sjust say it's back

strain. My ortho refuses to even examine me even though I have pain shooting

down my leg. What is going on in this world?. Am I truely this hateable?

Sue K

[Guest guest]

Dear Sue

No you are not hateful and never think that again!!!! You are hurting

and feeling so alone with your pain. Yes, we all do ignore our self

care and battle on alone, but you need to learn to love you too and by

loving you you will take yourself off to the ER. If it was me in your

shoes, what would you advise me to do? Type out a reply to your e-mail

to me and then I will post it back to you. Remember I am suffering just

as you are suffering. I need your help to do this so please help me

help you.

Prayers, love and hugs to you,

Lilian.

Sukoz@... wrote:

>

> Yesterday when my eye turn red and became terribly painful I was told to go

> to the ER but didn't go. I then made an appoinment to see an optomitrist but

> when we got there I was too scared to go in.My husband thinks I am crazy and

> all we have been doing is fighting. BUt I am tired of going in to see a Dr

> when I am hurting and then being told I'm crazy so I was afraid, of that

> happening again. so here I am again day2 with a red eye that gives me a

> headache, eye pain and hurts my cheek (but no gooop like in pink eye) . I

> feel like crap but have to take my dog to obedienceschool (He's hopefully

> graduating), the little dog to get groommed and my husband is going to

> Providence to find out his fate of his job. All this and I still don't know

> what to do for my eye or whether or not I'm damaging by letting it hurt as

> much as it does. The only place I can go is the ER since my primary is on

> vacation and I can't get a referral. Any ideas for self care? Like I said it

> is basically just red and slightly swollen. Hurts alot and periodically the

> muscles lock so it won't move. Please someone respond. Since I freaked out

> abosaid ut this last night my husband has declared it a taboo subject and he

> tried to help me by driving me to the optomtrist in the mall. I want him to

> understand I am scared. I want him to hold my hand. I am tired of going

> through life alone and in pain. Off to doggie school. PLease send good

> thoughts that Jeter doesn't act up. Last night becasue of our fighting (I

> think) Jeter went and pe-ed on every bed. That includes dog beds!. This is

> all way to much for me. BTW My brother a non-eds person has back pain so he

> is getting an MRI. I have had daily back pain that is not controlled by

> oxycontin since my accident in January. All the Dr'sjust say it's back

> strain. My ortho refuses to even examine me even though I have pain shooting

> down my leg. What is going on in this world?. Am I truely this hateable?

>

> Sue K

>

>

[Guest guest]

Sue,

I can understand the pain and frustration and...*fear* that you must be

going through right now, but (as Lillian put it very well,) you would have

great concern for anyone of us,if we were to post with this problem,

and that you would *strongly* encourage us to get to the hospital or a

specialist ASAP!...(I don't think " I " would just go to a mall clinic for

this...)

Although we can't " be there " in person to hold your hand...know that we

*are* with you in thought and caring...This is a very scary thing you are

experiencing, but Pleeeaase...Do Not risk any possibility of damage to

your eyes, because of the fear...and it important (although very tiring),

that you continue to take care of yourself...despite the overwhelming

" ness " ...of it " all "

please let us know how your visit...goes...(I am optimistic that you will

have it seen to...)

Take Care,

Hugs,

Cheri