Guest guest Posted December 26, 2007 Report Share Posted December 26, 2007 thanks to everyone who responded to my post about trust. i really took everything into consideration and really appreciate it. im still new to this, but i have noticed that sometimes i have behaved in some of the ways my NADA has. it scares me to death. my worst fear is that i will become like her. i have had the rages, although through common sense i don't allow myself to behave like that anymore. i think i have split other people, and done a few other things that i think are horrible. although i have not been diagnosed, i honestly believe (after researching) that i don't have BPD and have asked other close family members to tell me what they thought and they agreed that i don't have it. i know that " catching " some of the behaviors of a NADA is common, and i think this may be the case for me. How do i stop doing these things? i have made improvement already, but some of the things i do scare me. i just DONT want to be like her. and i don't want to hurt the people around me. What can i do to control these habits or emotions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 26, 2007 Report Share Posted December 26, 2007 Don't feel alone in that -- I've done all that you listed, too. Somehow, once I found out about BPD in my mother and started to understand that it's " emotions gone wild " , I started to be more perceptive about my own reactions to daily life. I started to be aware of my ability to regulate my own emotions -- to be calmer with my kids, with my husband, no more raging at him when I'm really angry, speaking up when it's warranted, forgiving myself for not being perfect, etc..... It all worked together, and over the course of about 18 months, my behavior truly changed -- it calmed down. I was a better wife and mother -- realized I could handle whatever came my way without being a screech hag, or screaming, drama-addicted mother. I could just give of myself and be me. I'm a different person now. I know you can be, too. Read some of the books recommended here -- in addition to understanding your mother more, you'll gain a template for how NOT to be -- for yourself! That's what worked for me, and it really was as simple as that. The decision that I was going to do it differently -- I wasn't going to indulge my emotions, at the expense of other people, like my mother. -Kyla Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.