New member

Posted November 11, 2006 · November 11, 2006

Hi welcome!

Sorry that you have to be here with us though. I just got back from a trip to

Vegas, my Auntie/Uncle live there and i have to say it really is beautiful

there.

I'm and i have 4 torn disks in my neck all from a non-ergonomic work

station. I was on work comp for 2yrs and then returned to my job working 12hr

night shifts.

I was told by the Neurosurgoen that i am NOT a surgery canidate due to too

much damage in my neck, so i take 40mgs of Methadone for the pain and Effexor

for the depression and Trazadone for sleep and Provigil to wake me up so i can

get to my night job!

Hard to believe i'm only 40yrs and have a body of a 80yrd all due to my job.

Posted November 18, 2006 · November 18, 2006

Welcome, Mark. I'm sorry that you have the need for a chronic-pain support

group, but glad that you found us.

I'm sure that once you start pain management, you'll feel enormous relief,

although it may take some trial and error to find that magic mix that works for

you. I've dealt with pain all my life, but only in August 2005 did it become

intractable. After getting the runaround from orthos and neuros for a while, my

pcp sent me to pain management, and it's make an enormous difference.

While I'm not pain-free, my pain is under control. I was lucky to find someone

who is willing to work with ME and who doesn't have a " one size fits all "

approach to alleviating pain. Hope you get someone who will take the time to

adjust meds, try different non-medical approaches, etc.

A side note: I'm surprised that you're not on a mood stabilizer, as in general,

an antidepressant alone is not effective for bipolar. (My daughter is bipolar,

and I'm very involved in an online support group for parents of young adult

bipolar children.)

What's interesting is that many of the meds used for nerve pain are also used

for Bipolar, such as neurontin, lyrica, topomax, trileptal, etc. So you may end

up killing two birds with one stone once you start pain management. I urge you

to double-check all meds with your psychiatrist, though, so that you don't get

activated or plunge into depression.

I know that you'll learn a lot here (I sure have), and get the support you need.

Please let us know how your appointment goes.

Hugs,

a

Posted November 21, 2006 · November 21, 2006

Jen 1 wrote:

> Being a person with chronic pain does NOT make us less than whole, and

> it makes me sad that you feel that way. I feel like I am a much

> stronger, wiser person for having gone through this, and I know a lot

> of people here share this view.

I certainly do share your view Miz Jen :-)

Yesterday I took a new wheelchair over to a 51 year old client, who has recently

had a leg amputated just below the hip. She is also totally blind in one eye

and is rapidly going blind in the other. She's had two heart attacks and three

strokes in the last two years.

Does any of the above make her " less than whole? "

Not on your life.

She's active, helpful, thoughtful, smart, and has a wicked sense of humour.

She's amazing. She deliberately still lives alone. She's figured out how to

make her own meals, take her own showers, do dishes, and keep her home clean.

Having a chance to visit with her always makes my day. She's a " whole person "

through and though!!

--

Lyndi

Posted November 21, 2006 · November 21, 2006

> Having a chance to visit with her always makes my day. She's

a " whole person " through and though!!

Lyndi

I don't feel like a whole person or even deserving to be. It seem's

like a life time ago but I remember being strong,active, and

independent. IUsed to do so much with my kid's. I feel like a lousy

mom. Even when I try I end up feeling worse. I've gotten several

job's but Ialway's end up unable to do them. I know there are people

worse off than myself and I do feel for them but that doesn't make

me any happier with my life.

Posted January 28, 2007 · January 28, 2007

--- " Chia " wrote:

>

> I am new here and would like to introduce myself.

Welcome, Chia. We're glad you're here, although I'm sorry for the pain

that brought you to us.

It sounds like you have lots of experience to share with others here!

I hope we'll be able to give you a bit of support as well. Just dive

right in to the conversations and you'll feel right at home here very

soon.

Cheryl in AZ

Moderator

Posted January 28, 2007 · January 28, 2007

Hi, Chia, I have the Fibromyalgia and know what your going through.

Glad you joined the group. Carol

----- Original Message -----

From: Chia

I am new here and would like to introduce myself.

Posted October 29, 2007 · October 29, 2007

I am new to this group. Let's start with some backgroud history.

Since a very young age I knew something wasn't right about my moms

mental status. As I aged and went to college I learned to be very

caution of my actions to ensure that I did not upset my mother.

When I got married she had an extremely hard time to the point that

I went for counseling to learn how to practice boundaries...( I am a

oncology social worker and still feel at a lose of how to cope with

this) Anyway, that was about 4 years ago and I have felt like I was

on the right track. Well, then my parents decide to separetion and

everything has fallen apart. I have lost my way to function with

boundaries. I mom has tried to committe suicide three times in the

last 4mt. by taking pill.( many threaten to try again) One time lead

to in-patient for 2 days in which all of us my siblings (their's 4

including me) came together to help her cope and have a plan for

safty which meant we each took turns staing at her house for about 2

(she would not stay at our houses). Not knowing exactly what was

happening we found a great psychiatist. but this roller coaster

cont. to get worst. I went to see another counselor last wk. who

stated that she may have BPS so I called her doctor who confirmed

that could be the case and that he thinks he can treat her and has

treated others with this dx.

She calls my step dad everyday...to the point that he has changed

his number. She is now calling his job no stop.

They have a legal separetion agreement that he is following.

I think I am just tried of the midnight calls that make no sence and

have no solution. And being told that I don't care about her and

that I don't understand and that she never wants to talk to me again

I have read the book walking on eggshell. I just don't know what

else to do. Myself and my youngest borhter are getting the brunt for

the storm. Thanks for allowing me to vent. ALB

Posted October 30, 2007 · October 30, 2007

Your post really strikes a chord with me. Being raised by a BPD mother and

subsequant lack of boundaries and you chose a job in not only social work but

oncology SW, which is notoriously difficult to maintain boundaries in. I can

relate because I chose to be not only an RN, but a Hospice RN. My mom also has

had multiple suicide attempts in past year and 3 inpt stays. I know what I find

difficult is my lack of ability to help her, as I help people through very

difficult times on a daily basis. Although I am new to accepting help with my

mother situation myself, I will share what has been working for me so far.

First, I read my email from this group every day. I feel that setting aside

quiet time daily to think and feel about my mother has better prepared me for my

interactions with her. Also, the insight of members who have been dealing with

this for longer than me has proved helpful beyond words. Second, I started

seeing a counselor 1x every 2 weeks just to talk

about my mother issues. I picked someone not afilliated with me through work

because I feel that although I work with social workers, couselors and other

support staff, they need a break from hearing about my mother. Third I stepped

back from her daily care. I did intervene originally with her discharge plans

from the hospital. I helped set her up with an aftercare day program and Easter

Seals which provided her safe housing, but I am letting the people that work

with her do their job without my interference. I like to think my lack of

boundaries helps me be a better nurse, but I have come to realize it can no

longer be tolorated with my mother. It was making my life unmanageable. Good

luck navigating yourself through this difficult time with your mom but please

remember, just like you are not responsible for your pts actions, you are not

responsible for your mother's either.

alb123455 wrote: I am new to this group. Let's

start with some backgroud history.