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M by Proxy

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thank you

I feel/think that I lived a very hard family life. M by proxy was surely part of

it but as you say there were BPD and narcissic aspects to my mother (still

difficult to use nada) I'm so worried about being crazy in talking, our unspoken

bond was not to ever,ever talk about her or I'd die. So here I am breaking the

trust bond, thank you all so much for the support and understanding and respect.

TC

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To get rid of the secrets and the pain that goes with them. Same as lancing a

boil.

Re:M by Proxy

Just ditto to what bink said.

And, M by proxy was part of my m's treatment of me, too. And, yeah, all the

comorbidity and different sorts of intense craziness working together (or

separately) make it really hard to process.

I wasn't ever supposed to talk about m, either. Her problems WERE the bond

between us -- esp the " voices " she heard and her visions of evil things.

According to her, those were psychic experiences that made her special, and I

was never to reveal them to anyone. I still feel guilty and have only managed to

tell one therapist about them.

Why I am telling now I have no idea...

Pea

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