Re: Out with the old......

February 14, 2005

Alisa,

I got teary just reading about your clothing story.

Clothes may just be clothing but as women I really feel that we have

an attachment to them. We wear then and when something happens in

our life that is big...a memory becomes attached to that piece of

clothing. So, what seems like a bag of clothing that no longer fits

becomes a bag full of memories.

Perhaps it is a memory of when you bought it. You were proud to fit

into that size. You never thought that you could wear that

particular color but you were wrong - it looked awesome on you. It

was a gift from a loved one. So much can be attached to the

clothing.

Being in the store when people were trying on your old things was

hard yet look at how amazingly rewarding it is. You made a woman

feel like she could conquer the world. And she probably will. In

that pink blouse and perriwinkle suit.

Kathy

February 14, 2005

Alisa --

you are a gem! I cannot imagine how theraputic it must be to watch another woman

transform for the better when she is wearing one of your blouses (oranother

item...).

Most of my clothes went to the support group people...so I see them every now

and again...sometimes they travel from one person to the next. But these are

not women that 'in need'...just in need of smaller clothes for a couple

weeks/month.

blessings to you my friend!

jb-bb

Alisa B wrote:

Evening ladies.

I have been ruminating over this since I did it Saturday morning.

What did I do? I donated a trash bag full of outsized clothes.

You're thinking...that's not a biggie. Many of us do. But this bag

was the last really big bag of clothing I had sitting around the house

(for no reason). And in it were clothes that were a touch too big

last spring and summer and would be completely unwearable now.

It's like a loss. I knew intellectually I needed to get that stuff

gone. But...emotionally...sigh.

I volunteer for Dress for Success and work in one of the " boutiques "

as a personal shopper. This has been so much more rewarding than I

thought it would be. So Saturday morning, I decided once and for all

to get rid of these clothes. I was driven by the fact that my last

time there I was trying to suit a young girl who was at least a 30 or

32 and about 5 feet tall. Fortunately she found a skirt and a shirt I

had donated--with another shirt underneath because the overshirt was

too small. So I knew (intellectually again!) that the need was there.

I tried to give myself an out--I was running late, the bag was too

heavy, etc. But I took it with me anyway. And took it inside. The

volunteer coordinator was there--my new volunteer (I'm a lead--which

means keyholder...lol) didn't show, so she was there to help.

The first 2 ladies didn't show, so Aimie and I went to work on the

things she brought as well as my bag. And every item brought back a

memory. The red wrap dress that I nicknamed boobalicious because of

the front. The green linen dress...the first pair of pants I bought

off the rack at Target. I started feeling funny--and kept trying to

think of a way to NOT give my life away!

Then one of the ladies came in. She was an 18-20 but kind of top

heavy. We found a great suit in a gray/kinda soft periwinkle...and

then the blouse search. I told her to trust me and then picked up one

of my favorite things. The irridescent pink blouse. She frowned but

went for it.

When she came out of the fitting room she looked beautiful. And I was

crushed. My blouse had become HER blouse...and she looked good. She

didn't think so for a while (she had never EVER worn a suit) and then

when her self-esteem got better she said " I look beautiful. " And she

did. I'm tearing up thinking of it now--she immediately covered her

mouth because she didn't think she should have said it. And I quickly

let her know that she WAS beautiful, she needed to own it and that she

needed the suit and that blouse because it was obviously meant to be.

The 2nd group of women had come and were early--and they told her how

beautiful she looked as well--and how pretty that pink blouse was.

That blouse had sat in my closet for 4 months after I bought it

because it was too damn small. And then once I COULD wear it I wore it

often. The irridescence made it have a blue undertone and there was

embroidery on the bottom. I always liked wearing it because everyone

liked it on me. And it made me feel beautiful on days when I might not

have.

And now it looked good on someone else. Someone who DESERVED it.

Aimie knew I was having some discomfort with this giving away of

things--I had voiced it before anyone came in. But she told me that

by me giving away the things I could no longer wear, I was offering

another woman the chance to be as pretty and beautiful in them as I

had felt.

When the young lady left, she did an exit eval and said that me

convincing her to take a chance and try a suit with a skirt and that

blouse made her feel that she could take a chance ANYWHERE.

I'm glad I gave away that last big bag of " fat clothing " ladies. But

I still feel that loss and I know that it's silly--they were just

clothes for crying out loud--but I guess it signals that I am and have

moved on. From the world of " Oh God...do they have a bigger size

cause this one's too small? " to " Oh God...I'm going to cry because

this is a SMALLER size. "

It's a hard transition to make...but I know my beautiful feeling when

I wore a specific item will be passed in spirit to someone else. And

that makes it a bit better.

Alisab

To visit your group on the web, go to:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/GastricBypass-LOSERS/

February 14, 2005

Good for you Alisa! I loved some of my fat clothes so much that I hung

on to them in the hope that I could alter them. But I really had no

conception of just how great the difference in size would be. They would

have had to be completely re-constructed. So I either sold them cheaply

on Ebay or gave them away to fellow WLSers. The joy they gave to others

made up for my loss and now I realize that they belonged to the old me.

I wouldn't want to wear them now anyway.

Hopefully you will actually feel better once you have got over your

loss. It's just part of the process......................

Carol

Out with the old......