Re: Developmental milestones 30 months??

August 13, 2007

Hi Rene,

Autism Speaks has a page on their website that will

give red flags. I am not sure how helpful that will be

but a research group call IAN (Interactive Autism

Research) sent out a press release last week

discussing their results which also included that many

parents noticed that their children had temper

tantrums. This was rather odd in that " temper

tantrums " was not even an option but the parents

choose " other " and wrote in the description " temper

tantrums " when asked what the first signs were that

something was not quite right.

Please try to hang in there and find out why your son

is having these temper tantrums.

All the best,

Jill

--- Rene <joeandren@...> wrote:

> Hi, My 30 month old son is worrying me. The

> pediatrician doesn't

> think anything is wrong but I am not sure.

>

> Does anyone have a social developmental milestone

> cheat sheet for this

> age?

>

> He is ahead in speech and does more pretend play

> than his 41/2 yr

> brother with HFA. My main concern is mostly

> solitary play. He is off

> by himself for hours. No interst in playing with

> older siblings. ANd

> he is prone to temper tantrums, bad mood. Can't

> distract him out of

> them. How much of this is just his age? I have no

> clue. Possibly

> I'm paranoid about everything right now. HB thinks

> he's fine but

> again, I'm with him all day and I feel like crying

> b.c. I'm so anxious

> that we may be missing something.

>

> Thanks

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Moody friends. Drama queens. Your life? Nope! - their life, your story. Play

Sims Stories at Games.

http://sims./

August 13, 2007

Rene, I don't have a chart but I will tell you to play with him. As much as

possible, get on his level, let him head the play and just play and use eye

contact. My 5 yr old has autism, but very mild and I feel the reason is becuase

when i noticed at 14 mo that something was not right, I did all I could to

interact with him 24/7. I would not let him play alone, or isolate himself. I

got in the floor and spent hours there, playing. Do it with excitement, keep him

interested. After about 2 mo. my very seldom retreated to the aloneness. I know

the laundry and dishes will pile up, but I feel it is very important to help the

cchild learn that social play is better then alone play.

Cheryl

The Killman's

Jack, Cheryl and Kile

---- Rene <joeandren@...> wrote:

Hi, My 30 month old son is worrying me. The pediatrician doesn't

think anything is wrong but I am not sure.

Does anyone have a social developmental milestone cheat sheet for this

age?

He is ahead in speech and does more pretend play than his 41/2 yr

brother with HFA. My main concern is mostly solitary play. He is off

by himself for hours. No interst in playing with older siblings. ANd

he is prone to temper tantrums, bad mood. Can't distract him out of

them. How much of this is just his age? I have no clue. Possibly

I'm paranoid about everything right now. HB thinks he's fine but

again, I'm with him all day and I feel like crying b.c. I'm so anxious

that we may be missing something.

Thanks

August 13, 2007

I forgot to add that your son could just have temper

tantrums. I had a friend who had a son that walked on

his toes. He went through all kinds of testing for one

year to find out that he liked to walk on his toes. -

Take Care. Jill

--- Jill Boyer <sjillboyer@...> wrote:

> Hi Rene,

>

> Autism Speaks has a page on their website that will

> give red flags. I am not sure how helpful that will

> be

> but a research group call IAN (Interactive Autism

> Research) sent out a press release last week

> discussing their results which also included that

> many

> parents noticed that their children had temper

> tantrums. This was rather odd in that " temper

> tantrums " was not even an option but the parents

> choose " other " and wrote in the description " temper

> tantrums " when asked what the first signs were that

> something was not quite right.

>

> Please try to hang in there and find out why your

> son

> is having these temper tantrums.

>

> All the best,

>

> Jill

> --- Rene <joeandren@...> wrote:

>

> > Hi, My 30 month old son is worrying me. The

> > pediatrician doesn't

> > think anything is wrong but I am not sure.

> >

> > Does anyone have a social developmental milestone

> > cheat sheet for this

> > age?

> >

> > He is ahead in speech and does more pretend play

> > than his 41/2 yr

> > brother with HFA. My main concern is mostly

> > solitary play. He is off

> > by himself for hours. No interst in playing with

> > older siblings. ANd

> > he is prone to temper tantrums, bad mood. Can't

> > distract him out of

> > them. How much of this is just his age? I have

> no

> > clue. Possibly

> > I'm paranoid about everything right now. HB

> thinks

> > he's fine but

> > again, I'm with him all day and I feel like crying

> > b.c. I'm so anxious

> > that we may be missing something.

> >

> > Thanks

> >

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

> Moody friends. Drama queens. Your life? Nope! -

> their life, your story. Play Sims Stories at

> Games.

> http://sims./

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Moody friends. Drama queens. Your life? Nope! - their life, your story. Play

Sims Stories at Games.

http://sims./

August 13, 2007

what child doesn't have tantrums? some kids have more temper than others!

Cheryl

The Killman's

Jack, Cheryl and Kile

---- Jill Boyer <sjillboyer@...> wrote:

Hi Rene,

Autism Speaks has a page on their website that will

give red flags. I am not sure how helpful that will be

but a research group call IAN (Interactive Autism

Research) sent out a press release last week

discussing their results which also included that many

parents noticed that their children had temper

tantrums. This was rather odd in that " temper

tantrums " was not even an option but the parents

choose " other " and wrote in the description " temper

tantrums " when asked what the first signs were that

something was not quite right.

Please try to hang in there and find out why your son

is having these temper tantrums.

All the best,

Jill

--- Rene <joeandren@...> wrote:

> Hi, My 30 month old son is worrying me. The

> pediatrician doesn't

> think anything is wrong but I am not sure.

>

> Does anyone have a social developmental milestone

> cheat sheet for this

> age?

>

> He is ahead in speech and does more pretend play

> than his 41/2 yr

> brother with HFA. My main concern is mostly

> solitary play. He is off

> by himself for hours. No interst in playing with

> older siblings. ANd

> he is prone to temper tantrums, bad mood. Can't

> distract him out of

> them. How much of this is just his age? I have no

> clue. Possibly

> I'm paranoid about everything right now. HB thinks

> he's fine but

> again, I'm with him all day and I feel like crying

> b.c. I'm so anxious

> that we may be missing something.

>

> Thanks

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Moody friends. Drama queens. Your life? Nope! - their life, your story. Play

Sims Stories at Games.

http://sims./

August 13, 2007

Rene,

I'm not sure if your older son is a patient of Dr. G, but I think he would

suggest that you run some of the " " labs on your younger son to get a

look at what is happening inside of his body. I had some concerns about my

younger son, too, and our excellent pediatrician laughed it off (I was

worried because he was lining up his cars and had a phenomenal rote memory).

I was right. He wasn't " off " enough for anyone to see it but me. It wasn't

until he started having horrific seizures that we jumped on the bandwagon

and looked at his immune system.

Parents have an intuition that no one else does about their child. That

said, we also worry so much that we can read a lot into everything because

of our fears.

If you don't have children in Dr.G's care, I'm not sure how much the labs

would mean to someone else (because the pattern is in some ways very subtle)

and even if they recognized a problem, most doctors wouldn't know what to do

about it anyway.

You an find the proposed work-up at...

http://www.neuroimmunedr.com//Proposed_Work-Up_/proposed_work-up_nid

s.html

If the link doesn't work, just copy and paste the whole web address.

In any case, you might want to try the diet and see if that is any help

at all... just a change in diet made a big, obvious difference in two of my

kids.

Best of luck,

Caroline

August 13, 2007

Hi Rene

There are a few diagnostics tests that would give you an idea if your son is

developmentally " on track " . One is the Brigance Diagnostic Inventory of Early

Development (Birth to Seven Years); another is the CHAT (Checklist for Autism in

Toddlers) and/or the CARS ( Childhood Autism Rating Scale). You may be able to

find these tests on-line, however the results wouldn't be considered 100% valid

unless the tests were admintered by a liscenced psych. My child had these tests

done at the Center for Autism and Related Disorders (CARD) in Tarzana CA. I

went there to have him tested after several doctors insisted that he was " Fine "

or " Just a little spoiled " . Turned out that they were all wrong, he is

autistic.

If you are not in the los angeles ca area, CARD has other locations, you can

check them out at www.centerforautism.com

Best of luck.

Sonya

Rene <joeandren@...> wrote:

Hi, My 30 month old son is worrying me. The pediatrician doesn't

think anything is wrong but I am not sure.

Does anyone have a social developmental milestone cheat sheet for this

age?

He is ahead in speech and does more pretend play than his 41/2 yr

brother with HFA. My main concern is mostly solitary play. He is off

by himself for hours. No interst in playing with older siblings. ANd

he is prone to temper tantrums, bad mood. Can't distract him out of

them. How much of this is just his age? I have no clue. Possibly

I'm paranoid about everything right now. HB thinks he's fine but

again, I'm with him all day and I feel like crying b.c. I'm so anxious

that we may be missing something.

Thanks

---------------------------------

Luggage? GPS? Comic books?

Check out fitting gifts for grads at Search.

August 13, 2007

Hi Rene -

Re you concerns... you must listen to your instincts

but at the same time manage your anxiety about it -

easier said than done I know. Get support from some

of us. Email me off-list all you want. Husbands also

tend to be late noticing issues-don't be too mad at

him (like I was at mine). Don't assume that what you

are seeing now is going to get worse, because often it

gets better. It will take some time to figure out

what is " wrong " and what is a bit different but can

still be transient.

I would be concerned re the solitary play, and work on

trying to pull him out of it some. Is he home all day

or in preschool? If in preschool, try to find out how

he is interacting with other children during the day.

If it's ok, then at home, he could be taking a break.

But you do want to make a concerted effort to involve

him, and try to get him to follow you to do tasks in

the house, like getting help folding laundry, putting

spoons in the dishwasher, sweeping, etc. See if more

animation and cheery voice will help. In my

experience, when I get anxious about my children, I

withdraw to an observing state and they will go on

about their business, so I actually contribute to the

problem and have to force myself to interact -

especially when I'm stressed.

My brother was a solitary child as well, and I (the

oldest) had lots of Aspie traits, but was more of an

OCD/PANDAS kid w/high anxiety in the early years. I

didn't want to play w/kids and didn't like typical

child games. My brother wasn't big on toys either,

and although he did play w/his little sister, it was

because she dragged him into it ... otherwise he would

easily play alone for a long time.

My brother was solemn, serious, and had food-related

sensory issues, and has incredible rote memory. I used

to also but it went away. My brother, though, blows my

mind the way his rote memory functions w/numbers and

w/movie scripts, comedy skits, but incredibly can

memorize part numbers and crazy details for nearly any

year/make/model for 3 different cars. It is truly

spectacular. He has engineering skills without any

training and keeps improving parts and making his own

in some cases. It's really wierd. He is socially

great and is adored instantly by nearly anyone who

meets him. He is prone to anxiety and doesn't like

large crowds except at the Porshe club. I can

remember very subtle autistic-like traits, obsessive

interest, and solemn-type personality, but he has

grown up normal, incredibly witty, and has many good

friends. I tell you this because considering what I

know about autism, if he were my child right now, yup

- I'd be in a panic.

It is a good idea to address possible allergies, make

sure he stays as well as possible (quick to address

infections), and consider removing dairy from his

diet. I wouldn't get very obsessive about it but

would eliminate or at the very least cut back on

allergenic foods (no whole wheat, no food coloring, no

nuts, no berries, limit sugar and too many simple

carbs).

A few questions:

Does he have eczema?

Does he have dark circles or puffy under eyes?

Does he have red cheeks or ears?

What is he doing when he's off by himself?

Will he run and play on the playground or climb like

peers, or does he tend to conserve his physical

energy?

Regarding his speech - does the tone of voice have a

little lilt at the end where his voice goes up higher

at the end of a few words?

Is he looking into your eyes when you speak to him?

Does he 'reference' - look around to see where you are

- if you're in public and you get a few feet apart?

Does he point and show you things, or bring you

anything? (Not all the time ... just once in a while,

maybe in a different place than home)

Regarding irritability - I get that when my kids are

eating foods they are intolerant to. Soy proteins -

especially in soy milk and worst of all soy lecithen -

sets my son off into rages after having it about 5

days in a row. (BTW soybean oil is FINE - no proteins

in it). After I remove a food, it takes about 6 days

for the irritability to ease up. The biggest clue if

this is a problem for your child could be if his

pupils look slightly dilated even in bright light.

My HFA son at 4 1/2 had lots of problems and had

absolutely nothing to do with his little brother -

except to freak out anytime he came near, and at 8, he

has improved sooo much. The remaining problems are

mostly social interaction w/kids he doesn't know or

play with much, but he does want to play pretty often.

In fact, right now he's out in the woods in the back

yard pouting/sulking big time because his little

brother wanted to play video games instead of playing

with him, and he's blatantly trying to get me to feel

sorry for him. He behaves so normally most of the

time that it's easy to forget that he still has some

issues left over to be addressed. I certainly could

not have imagined him doing this well back when he was

4.

HTH-

--- Rene <joeandren@...> wrote:

> Hi, My 30 month old son is worrying me. The

> pediatrician doesn't

> think anything is wrong but I am not sure.

>

> Does anyone have a social developmental milestone

> cheat sheet for this

> age?

>

> He is ahead in speech and does more pretend play

> than his 41/2 yr

> brother with HFA. My main concern is mostly

> solitary play. He is off

> by himself for hours. No interst in playing with

> older siblings. ANd

> he is prone to temper tantrums, bad mood. Can't

> distract him out of

> them. How much of this is just his age? I have no

> clue. Possibly

> I'm paranoid about everything right now. HB thinks

> he's fine but

> again, I'm with him all day and I feel like crying

> b.c. I'm so anxious

> that we may be missing something.

>

> Thanks

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Sick sense of humor? Visit TV's

Comedy with an Edge to see what's on, when.

http://tv./collections/222

August 13, 2007

> what child doesn't have tantrums? some kids have more temper than

others!

Just wanted to agree here -- he's 30 months; that's 2-1/2 years old,

i.e. The Terrible Twos. That's when *typical* kids have temper tantrums.

At that age, my ASD son *didn't* have tantrums.

I understand your concern, though. But if he's good at pretend play

and he's ahead in speech, it sounds like he's developing pretty well.

The next thing I would watch is how he interacts with peers.

all the best...HTH,

Donna

August 14, 2007

True. Many children do have tantrums. I have two ASD

children but they are both completely different. My

eight year old had some tantrums and is low

functioning. My six year old () was quite

different. He is diagnosed with PDD-NOS and still has

problems with tantrums. The smallest thing would set

him off. When he was a year and a half, he would stack

toys on top of each other and would scream when they

fell down. When playing with a shape sorter, he would

scream if the circle did not fit into the square

shaped whole. Just last night, he noticed that one of

lego men did not have his hat and instead of looking

for it, he would scream " that is hat was missing " . If

the tantrums are so severe and frequent that he cannot

function properly, then I would be concerned.

Otherwise, it is just a tantrum.

All the best,

Jill

Here is a link to IAN's research results:

http://www.iancommunity.org/cs/ian_research_reports/ian_research_report_july_200\

7

It is interesting to note that the largest category

chosen by parents of children with Asperger's was

" Other, " and that many parents of children with Autism

or PDD-NOS chose this, as well. When researchers see

that, they know that at least one crucial category was

missing from the possible responses they provided with

their questionnaire. What might this have been?

To find out, we looked at the comments entered by

parents who had chosen " Other. " (The IAN

questionnaires provide parents a space in which to

type additional thoughts or explanations when they

feel a simple " yes " or " no " answer isn't adequate to

convey what they mean.)

Many who had chosen " Other " described meltdowns,

rages, tantrums, anxiety, or constant crying as an

area of first concern. Additional areas of first

concern mentioned under " Other " were seizures, or

children who couldn't sit still or focus. Any future

questionnaires on this topic will need to include

categories that capture these.

--- thefamily007 <donnaaron@...> wrote:

>

> > what child doesn't have tantrums? some kids have

> more temper than

> others!

>

> Just wanted to agree here -- he's 30 months; that's

> 2-1/2 years old,

> i.e. The Terrible Twos. That's when *typical* kids

> have temper tantrums.

>

> At that age, my ASD son *didn't* have tantrums.

>

> I understand your concern, though. But if he's good

> at pretend play

> and he's ahead in speech, it sounds like he's

> developing pretty well.

> The next thing I would watch is how he interacts

> with peers.

>

> all the best...HTH,

>

> Donna

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Boardwalk for $500? In 2007? Ha! Play Monopoly Here and Now (it's updated for

today's economy) at Games.

http://get.games./proddesc?gamekey=monopolyherenow

August 14, 2007

Thanks for all the helpful responses. The problem is not that he's

having tantrums, but that when he does have one, 2 hours later he is

still in the midst of it, and no amount of distraction, fun etc.

will shake him out of it. He may have stopped screaming but he's

still sour yelling " No " to everything and or keeping to himself with

a sorrowful expression.

At least with my HFA 4 1/2 yr old we've figure out that physically

removing him from the site where it all started helps. Like if he

was inside, taking him outside and distracting him with something

out there.

We have not officially joined the protocol yet. We're in MI

and trying to figure out what to do first......and what we can

afford to do right now.....it's sad that it does come down to

that...$$$ We've been doing the diet intervention with some

success. No milk here. Have to get rid of the Soy and see if that

helps. Also looking at Pathways Medical Advocates....it seems

similar in some ways to ....have to check on the testing to see

if it's same.

>

> >

> > > what child doesn't have tantrums? some kids have

> > more temper than

> > others!

> >

> > Just wanted to agree here -- he's 30 months; that's

> > 2-1/2 years old,

> > i.e. The Terrible Twos. That's when *typical* kids

> > have temper tantrums.

> >

> > At that age, my ASD son *didn't* have tantrums.

> >

> > I understand your concern, though. But if he's good

> > at pretend play

> > and he's ahead in speech, it sounds like he's

> > developing pretty well.

> > The next thing I would watch is how he interacts

> > with peers.

> >

> > all the best...HTH,

> >

> > Donna

> >

>

_____________________________________________________________________

_______________

> Boardwalk for $500? In 2007? Ha! Play Monopoly Here and Now (it's

updated for today's economy) at Games.

> http://get.games./proddesc?gamekey=monopolyherenow

>

August 14, 2007

Hi Rene -

Re tantrums ... holding a grudge that long sounds more

like a subtle OCD - along the lines of a negative

thought and/or feeling getting stuck in a loop in the

head. This is going to sound AWEFUL - but ... watch

the TV show The Dog Whisperer re tactics he uses for

breaking up loops in dogs ... it works sometimes with

toddlers too! I have a hard time describing what I

" took " from it, but when a tantrum is starting,

sometimes a quick poke (not painful) and firm

re-direction and beginning to walk - no discussions or

reasoning - is what it takes to break a brain out of

the loop. I used to try cajoling, reasoning, fixing

.... but the only thing to truly work is a very abrupt

redirection.

But since you're doing that w/one child and it isn't

working - another suggestion that helps me get out of

loops is music. I MUST have music to break up an OCD

that I get stuck in. For me it's marches, rhythmic,

or fast and cluttered (and metal lol), but if your

child is drawn to a specific song, start playing that

as loud as he can stand it and see what happens. Some

Pink Floyd, Led Zepplin, or U2 really does miracles

for my youngest, who tends toward OCD and can keep

things going forever and can be quite difficult to

redirect sometimes.

If it's on OCD - he could easily play for hours alone

and not be suffering developmental delay. And OCD

among autism family and within autism itself is just a

piece of the immune picture.

BTW - if it's an OCD, congratulations ... it'll get

better. If he's had strep recently or a few times,

that can really trigger it. The other triggers in a

child (they don't often get mycoplasma but that's a

big one for me) could be lactobacillus ... is he on a

multi-strain probiotic? If so, reducing to a single

or low strain could help. Also, recent use of

Zythromycin and a couple of others sets it off in my

son, although for many, it helps rather than worsens.

Anyway - one of the things about is that less (as

far as meds and supplements) is definitely more, so

when you are feeling guilty for not buying all these

supplements that you read helped so and so's child,

remember - more often, there is a potential negative

waiting to happen, and too much 'stuff' will stress

the system. is about reducing triggers, not

pumping full of supplements etc to try to find an

improvement somewhere.

Do you have an early childhood intervention program

available for free? I'd call them and have them

evaluate.

I'm really starting to think you're describing an

OCD-prone child rather than autism, though I'm still

curious about they 'way' he speaks including tone

changes. Could you think about whether he displays

some other compulsive behaviors? Toddlers are

compulsive anyway by nature, but a couple of things

could stand out.

Call me ... 205-243-0162 ... I have lots of experience

w/OCD...

HTH-

--- Rene <joeandren@...> wrote:

> Thanks for all the helpful responses. The problem

> is not that he's

> having tantrums, but that when he does have one, 2

> hours later he is

> still in the midst of it, and no amount of

> distraction, fun etc.

> will shake him out of it. He may have stopped

> screaming but he's

> still sour yelling " No " to everything and or keeping

> to himself with

> a sorrowful expression.

>

> At least with my HFA 4 1/2 yr old we've figure out

> that physically

> removing him from the site where it all started

> helps. Like if he

> was inside, taking him outside and distracting him

> with something

> out there.

>

> We have not officially joined the protocol yet.

> We're in MI

> and trying to figure out what to do first......and

> what we can

> afford to do right now.....it's sad that it does

> come down to

> that...$$$ We've been doing the diet intervention

> with some

> success. No milk here. Have to get rid of the Soy

> and see if that

> helps. Also looking at Pathways Medical

> Advocates....it seems

> similar in some ways to ....have to check on the

> testing to see

> if it's same.

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Got a little couch potato?

Check out fun summer activities for kids.

http://search./search?fr=oni_on_mail & p=summer+activities+for+kids & cs=bz

August 14, 2007

The best option is to find a clinician who specializes in childhood disorders in

your area, even though I would suggest caution because he is so young. Temper

tantrums are common among ALL children, OCD behaviors are common among ALL

children. Severity, in conjunction with other severe symptoms, displayed in

more than three environments make behaviors diagnositic. If you need help with

findng someone professionally in your area, let me know.

Sincerely,

Juarez, M.S., Marriage and Family Therapist

August 14, 2007

My son walked on his toes SEVERELY until we started with Dr. G. It has MUCH

improved.

I don't believe that a child would 'just' have temper trantrums (unless