Abby

[Guest guest]

My dear Abby,

My heart falls apart when I read about your dad. What you write

reminds me how my dad was few months ago. It's so hard. I realize

that I try to forget how my father was only one year ago, when he

also used to look at me and cry, or when his eyes were watering. I

feel blessed, it's like we have been given a chance to touch this

horrible illness and then to observe the unexpected, that my dad is

recovering. He won't be back as he was two years ago, but I feel he's

sick but not that I'm loosing him. Even if I know that he can get

suddenly worse. Please, the latest as possible.

I'm sorry to read that the final decision was the one you opposed. If

THE right decision exists, I hope it's this.

It's wonderful to read that yesterday was such a good day for your

dad. I wish he will have many more of such good days.

Take care (and go on with a glass of wine if you need it to sleep),

la

>Thank you, thank you for relaying your very personal story with us.

>I hope that one day I can do what you, Sally, and so many others do

>for those who still have LOs fighting the LBD fight. We gain so much

>from your experiences.

>

>I completely agree with the decisions you made for your dad. My dad

>was never very specific about end of life issues but in December when

>we first discovered his brain tumor was back, he told us he didn't

>want to go through more MRIs and he resisted our suggestion that we

>go for a second opinion. Later, he did end up going for a second

>opinion but it was his decision and the doctor ended up using the

>results from the MRI taken at St. Mike's rather than having him go

>through another one.

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>My sister called the neurosurgeon's office today and told him we were

>going ahead with the procedure. My sense is the doctor didn't want

>to wait too long before performing the procedure but my dad needs to

>visit the anaesthesia clinic before the surgery is booked. I'm

>waiting for my sister to call and give me an indication as to when

>the surgery would be done. I told her I wouldn't make the call to

>the doctor's office since I was so opposed to the procedure. It was

>me being difficult I know but I couldn't bring myself to make that

>call.

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>My mother, like your mom, feels she is condemning my dad to death and

>wants to do this so she can know she's done all she could. Somewhere

>deep in me I understand that but intellectually and emotionally I

>can't get my head around it.

>

>I'm trying to be supportive but it's hard. I just got back from the

>home and looking at my dad it's hard to imagine he's that sick. Of

>course he is in a wheelchair but today was a good day for him

>cognitively so he visited with us and with my mom's cousins who

>visited him and contributed to the conversation significantly. They

>used to travel with these couples and they spoke of the sun and the

>fun they had last year at this time. As they were talking my dad's

>eyes were watering. That happens to him a lot these days. On our

>birthday, he would often just look at me and cry.

>

>I just hate this!!! I try to stay positive and look for the reason

>why this happened. I think on some level this is a harsh reminder of

>just how good life was for me before all this became our reality.

>

>Thanks always for your support.

>

>Abby

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>Welcome to LBDcaregivers.

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