A syndrome - Walking round & round in smaLL CIRCLES - long

[Guest guest]

A year ago I was talking to an old Gardiner

who had to give up work

because he had a heart condition,

resulting in a valve operation

Some of the resulting symptoms were:

a dimming of vision ->

fading vision ->

fading & falling into a heap

Great stuff if one is driving I said.

As U know

I see Autism in everyone & everything

The computer is my obsession

He said - 4 things 2 thrive

1 must water & feed them &

provide a suitable environment

but sometimes things go wrong

the environment is not always friendly

but somehow they survive anyway

they may not develop properly

but they are still alive

and who are we

to take away their life or reality

What he said

made sense to me,

because trying to make sense of

things takes up most of my time

To me that old Gardiner with a faulty heart

knew more about Autism than I did.

(I couldn't fire him, he retired)

He was talking about watering the plants,

suppling a self watering system

that would make the plants thrive.

(I'm allergic)

Dr G talks about

the restricted blood flow

in the Autistics brain

but isn't so concerned about the cause

it's too hard

He wants to develop drugs to

increase flow capability

Good idea

Our Mr Gardiner,

simply states the condition as

If the supply of food & water

is restricted,

things just don't thrive.

The Gardiner talked about his symptoms:

resulting in dimmed vision

(post operation especially)

It struck a familiar cord for me today

Vision dims for me, on certain special occasions

when upset or emotional or stressed or panicking

I had a head-on car accident years ago

I remember the day clearly

the sun was very dark for 2pm?

my vision was probably down to black and white

(like late at night)

maybe I was depressed

(that could cause it)

or forgot my meals (no fuel)... again

Perhaps I blacked out?

Perhaps I faded away

I suffer from Chronic Fatigue

+ every other condition known 2 man

2 do anything at all

requires obsessive drive

(which I have)

Perhaps I wasn't paying attention,

tuned out, of my environment

I do have adult ADHD

I saw a research document years ago

suggesting a link between

sloppy HEART VALVES

(which don't show up as a heart murmur)

and CHRONIC FATIGUE

Which no-one knows the CAUSE of -

just like Autism....

In collation, it would appear

that sloppy heart valves

COULD, in my case CAUSE maybe

Poor circulation

(resulting in most of the symptoms)

Autists often struggle, like me

to raise their hands above their head

some are known to be in continual motion

ants in their pants

My favourite " coping "

is to walk in little circles

round & round & up & down (we go)

it helps me think

& clear my head

POOR CIRCULATION to the brain may be

the cause of many Autistic SYMPTOMS

Symptoms are the bodies way of expressing

COPING or REPAIR

This accounts 4 many of the survival strategies

that many employ

to alleviate their condition

To suppress SYMPTOMS is something

the Medical / Doctors in RECENT history has adopted

(without any scientific or logical bases 4 it)

IMO

So what is the CURE?

Do I even want it

it would destroy my reality

I tried CHANGE -

it was like head butting a brick wall

CHANGE for an Autistic family is hard

very HARD

I tried even saying HI to people

but its like being dosed in petrol

someone is coming, smiling & holding a match.

That is what it feels like

If I ignore them, will they go away?

If I talk to them enough

I won't have to hear them

I'll remain in control

Even someone holding hands on TV

I have 2 leave the room

Emotional overload?

(u don't forget anything when there is emotion)

Paranoia also -

the Fear of doing anything,

going to see the Doctor

That is why I have failed my son

I have wasted time on my obsession

with the computer

in order to survive till now

I will now attempt 2 give him

what I think he needs

my TIME

the most valuable thing in the universe

and also a safe SPACE

2 survive in also.

(Stressed out with sons new School environment)

(and trying to cope)

(by echoing my thoughts)

& walking in circles

which is the only thing that helps ..

well it clears the mind

The physical pain is so intense that

it has triggered this post

via unipolar mania

Neil :-)

[Guest guest]

Dear Neil,

Thanks for the long post !!!

A year ago I was in your shoes, sometimes I still am. My son has undergone

four neurosurgeries this past year, and he is my HERO!

Life isn't fair ,the littlest ones suffer. God knows why?

I spent many months in a PICU and hospital room this past year observing the

suffering that so many little children endure everyday.

Thers is no point in blaming yourself for the lack of time spent with your

son beause of the time spent on your computer. ( I'm assuming looking for

answers)

If I had given up and stopped looking for an answer as to why my son was so

ill, he most certaintly would be dead today. I spent countless hours

searching through literature to try to help him.

We followed the protocol and still do to some extent. This in part has

always made sense to me.

Autism or is not a death sentence, although sometimes it seems like

one, there is hope, if you stop looking for answers , then what will you

do????

Time with your son is sooooooooo important, but time looking for answers is

NOT time wasted. IMHO !

Take care,

>From: " Neil " <n.clark@...>

>Reply-

>

>Subject: A syndrome - Walking round & round in smaLL CIRCLES - long

>Date: Sat, 12 Feb 2005 12:33:39 -0000

>

>

>

>

>A year ago I was talking to an old Gardiner

>who had to give up work

>because he had a heart condition,

>resulting in a valve operation

>

>Some of the resulting symptoms were:

>a dimming of vision ->

>fading vision ->

>fading & falling into a heap

>Great stuff if one is driving I said.

>

>As U know

>I see Autism in everyone & everything

>The computer is my obsession

>

>He said - 4 things 2 thrive

>1 must water & feed them &

>provide a suitable environment

>

>but sometimes things go wrong

>the environment is not always friendly

>but somehow they survive anyway

>they may not develop properly

>but they are still alive

>and who are we

>to take away their life or reality

>

>What he said

>made sense to me,

>because trying to make sense of

>things takes up most of my time

>

>To me that old Gardiner with a faulty heart

>knew more about Autism than I did.

>(I couldn't fire him, he retired)

>

>He was talking about watering the plants,

>suppling a self watering system

>that would make the plants thrive.

>(I'm allergic)

>

>Dr G talks about

>the restricted blood flow

>in the Autistics brain

>but isn't so concerned about the cause

>it's too hard

>He wants to develop drugs to

>increase flow capability

>Good idea

>

>Our Mr Gardiner,

>simply states the condition as

>If the supply of food & water

>is restricted,

>things just don't thrive.

>

>The Gardiner talked about his symptoms:

>resulting in dimmed vision

>(post operation especially)

>

>It struck a familiar cord for me today

>Vision dims for me, on certain special occasions

>when upset or emotional or stressed or panicking

>

>I had a head-on car accident years ago

>I remember the day clearly

>the sun was very dark for 2pm?

>my vision was probably down to black and white

>(like late at night)

>maybe I was depressed

>(that could cause it)

>or forgot my meals (no fuel)... again

>

>Perhaps I blacked out?

>Perhaps I faded away

>

>I suffer from Chronic Fatigue

>+ every other condition known 2 man

>2 do anything at all

>requires obsessive drive

>(which I have)

>Perhaps I wasn't paying attention,

>tuned out, of my environment

>I do have adult ADHD

>

>I saw a research document years ago

>suggesting a link between

>sloppy HEART VALVES

>(which don't show up as a heart murmur)

>and CHRONIC FATIGUE

>

>Which no-one knows the CAUSE of -

>just like Autism....

>

>In collation, it would appear

>that sloppy heart valves

>COULD, in my case CAUSE maybe

>Poor circulation

>(resulting in most of the symptoms)

>

>Autists often struggle, like me

>to raise their hands above their head

>some are known to be in continual motion

>ants in their pants

>

>My favourite " coping "

>is to walk in little circles

>round & round & up & down (we go)

>it helps me think

> & clear my head

>

>POOR CIRCULATION to the brain may be

>the cause of many Autistic SYMPTOMS

>

>Symptoms are the bodies way of expressing

>COPING or REPAIR

>

>This accounts 4 many of the survival strategies

>that many employ

>to alleviate their condition

>

>To suppress SYMPTOMS is something

>the Medical / Doctors in RECENT history has adopted

>(without any scientific or logical bases 4 it)

>IMO

>

>So what is the CURE?

>Do I even want it

>it would destroy my reality

>

>I tried CHANGE -

>it was like head butting a brick wall

>CHANGE for an Autistic family is hard

>very HARD

>

>I tried even saying HI to people

>but its like being dosed in petrol

>someone is coming, smiling & holding a match.

>That is what it feels like

>If I ignore them, will they go away?

>If I talk to them enough

>I won't have to hear them

>I'll remain in control

>Even someone holding hands on TV

>I have 2 leave the room

>Emotional overload?

>(u don't forget anything when there is emotion)

>Paranoia also -

>the Fear of doing anything,

>going to see the Doctor

>

>That is why I have failed my son

>I have wasted time on my obsession

>with the computer

>in order to survive till now

>

>I will now attempt 2 give him

>what I think he needs

>my TIME

>the most valuable thing in the universe

>and also a safe SPACE

>2 survive in also.

>

>(Stressed out with sons new School environment)

>(and trying to cope)

>(by echoing my thoughts)

>

> & walking in circles

>which is the only thing that helps ..

>well it clears the mind

>

>The physical pain is so intense that

>it has triggered this post

>via unipolar mania

>

>Neil :-)

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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>

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