Winner's Circle Network with Lou Tice - Acknowledging Our Feelings

[Guest guest]

Winner's Circle Network with Lou Tice - " Acknowledging Our Feelings "

What happens when you feel an emotion but refuse to admit it? Maybe more

than you think.

From the time we were children, most of us have been taught that it's OK to

express certain feelings but not others. We learned to hide emotions that

made other people uncomfortable or that somehow put us in a less than

favorable light. It was OK to feel grateful but not angry, OK to feel

confident but not scared, OK to defer to our parents but not to question

them, etc.

Sometimes we even learned to hide these unacceptable feelings from

ourselves. We feel frightened of social contact, but deny it and pretend

boredom. We feel hurt and rejected, but deny it and call it anger. We feel

resentful of abusive behavior but deny it, and call it a successful

relationship because we believe we need it to survive.

But unacknowledged feelings almost always cause trouble. We may be able to

stuff them down inside temporarily, but they invariably find another escape

route. Unacknowledged feelings will often manifest themselves in physical

ways - in backaches, headaches, ulcers, or other more serious illnesses.

What were you taught about feelings as a child? Now that you're older,

perhaps you'd like to learn what others have to say. Try reading

Bradshaw on shame, or Seligman on depression and optimism, or Harriet

Lerner on anger, for starters. Then, make up your own mind.

Lou Tice

The Pacific Institute

Blessings,

Charlene

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