Re: What I noticed/did this evening

[Guest guest]

thank you frank for sharing this

andrea

-- What I noticed/did this evening

First off, I had a pretty stressful day at work. I was involved in a

situation where someone was verbally abusive with me for a few hours. Yuck.

As I drove home I began reflecting on the conversations and what I should

have said. I noticed at one point that I was feeling rather upset. Then I

thought " I've really got a story going on here. Let me just pay attention to

the feelings rather than the story. " Then, as I did this, I noticed that how

just directing my attention there seemed to cause the feelings to shift.

(This harkens to the principle about being with something as it is and it

disappears.) As I watched, they diminished and I became more present. " Oh,

here I am driving in my truck, there's the road, there's other cars, etc. I

had a clear experience of the upset dropping away. I could see how the story

itself was the source of my upset and just focusing on the energy that the

story produced and being present with it undid the upset.

Then I'd get back into the story, ( " and then I should have said " ) and then

remember and repeat the whole ordeal. It was just such a great living

example of upset as the result of being in a story, and the access to

clearing it was being present to the feeling. And I'm not suggesting that

this replace the four questions or anything. If anything it reinforces the

tenet of our religion that without a story, there is no upset.

Love,

[Guest guest]

*****Thank you, , for these insights. I am sure that many here

can relate to similar situations. Here is how it is for me (Thank

you, Jan, and the others here, for teaching me to see and express it

in this manner) ...

FB: First off, I had a pretty stressful day at work. I was involved

in a situation where someone was verbally abusive with me for a few

hours. Yuck. As I drove home I began reflecting on the

conversations and what I should have said. I noticed at one point

that I was feeling rather upset. Then I thought " I've really got a

story going on here. Let me just pay attention to the feelings

rather than the story. "

*****Often, at such moments, the thought appears: " This whole thing

doesn't exist any longer ~ except in thought. The event is over,

done with, kaput, finis! What is happening now, right now! is

memory, producing a spinning tale of fantasy...I am upset about the

past, which is not. " The events over which I am stewing plain and

simply do NOT EXIST at this moment! The upset is seen to be tied

into thought, specifically thought of the past, not what is

happening Right Now! Seeing this often cuts off the horizontal

involvement. There may be a modest, lingering " afterglow " of the

upset, but not enough to upset me. :-)))

FB: Then, as I did this, I noticed that how just directing my

attention there seemed to cause the feelings to shift. (This harkens

to the principle about being with something as it is and it

disappears.) As I watched, they diminished and I became more

present. " Oh,

here I am driving in my truck, there's the road, there's other cars,

etc. I had a clear experience of the upset dropping away. I could

see how the story itself was the source of my upset and just

focusing on the energy that the story produced and being present

with it undid the upset.

****And this happens here also. It's like getting sucked into a

swirling vortex...the upset won't let me go. And, if I am graced

with it, awareness reminds me that what is happening right now, the

ONLY thing that is happening right now, is I am driving in my

truck. That is all that is real. The rest is memory, imagination,

the past delivered in instant recall. Unreal, except as thought.

This arising of this awares appears to provoke disassociation from

the mechanical mental process and evidently disrupts the involvement

either diminishing or eradicating the upset.

FB: Then I'd get back into the story, ( " and then I should have

said " ) and then remember and repeat the whole ordeal. It was just

such a great living example of upset as the result of being in a

story, and the access to clearing it was being present to the

feeling. And I'm not suggesting that this replace the four questions

or anything. If anything it reinforces the tenet of our religion

that without a story, there is no upset.

*****Instead of religion, I prefer belief system (primarily because

of the acronym: bs). And yes, all upset ~ beyond the ones that

arise and disappear momentarily ~ seems to exist only when 'bound'

to a story (usually a very old, deeply inbedded one).

You are all good teachers. This wouldn't be happening without your

participation and input. Thank you.