Re: Gems from Carol on depression :)

[Guest guest]

On Thu, Dec 18, 2003 at 02:08:32AM -0000, john.brennan@... wrote:

>

> Found another gem from our sweetie ex-moderator Carol on depression.

> Thanks to, to Viv who made the whole dialog possible

For what it's worth, and just to set the record straight, Carol is not

an ex-moderator. She still has moderator privileges for the group. I'm

handling the day-to-day care and feeding, but Carol is still there to

back me up (or straighten me out if need be.

Tom

[Guest guest]

> > How do I react when I think that thought?: I feel tired and

> > depressed. I feel desirous of sleep to come at me again. I long

for

> > death.

>

>

> ***Is that true? Is it really death that you long for?

>

>

> > I pull the duvet up and wish for oblivion and the crushing of the

> > thoughts and the negativity.

>

>

> ***UB: My thoughts will kill me.

>

>

> > My mind travels to my childhood - to 's suicide. College -

> > spending all day in bed. I seem to have spent my teenage years in

> > bed. The weight of living when my father left. Tied in a cot -

> > heaviness. Fear in the womb - a ten month old baby not wanting to

> > come into the physical. I get pain for holding this belief - 'I

> > wake up with despair.'

>

>

> ***Where do you feel the thought, " I wake up in despair " in your

> body? What is the physical sensation now when you are awake, when

you

> think that thought?

>

> ***What is the self-talk? What dialog to yourself runs through

your

> head when you go to sleep and anticipate waking up in despair?

What

> do you tell yourself when you wake up in the morning? Are you

> telling yourself the truth?

>

>

> >

> > Who would I be without the thought?: I would simply wake and step

> > out of bed. I would simply start my day. I wouldn't have to

> > struggle every morning to find the positive. I would find an

inner

> > peace immediately I woke.

>

>

> ***What if you woke up and the despairing thoughts were there, but

> you didn't have a story about their being true? Who would you be

> without the story that *you* were waking up in despair?

>

>

> >

> > T.A.

> > 'I do not wake up with despair.' No

> > 'My thinking wakes up with despair.' Absolutely.

> > 'I wake up with pleasure.' That would be wonderful.

>

> ***So how would you live your life differently if you worked with

> these turnarounds? What if " I woke up with pleasure " were as true

or

> truer?

>

> ***Try this turnaround: I sleep in despair. When you attach to

the

> thought that mornings are about despair...are you truly awake?

>

> Beautiful start, Viv. I love the way you are working-playing every

> day.

>

> Love, Carol

>

> And more love from ...

>

>

> Neo

I too suffered from depression, and it wasn't until almost six months

after i had read 's book and started doing 'the work' that i

really started to notice any marked difference...meet your thoughts

with kindness and understanding and they will let go of you...it is

true!!

i especially liked 's comments regarding my business, your

business, and God's business...and then also mentions our bodies

being the doctor's business...as well as talks about our confusion

about believing that our bodies should be a certain way...how do i

know my body isn't suppose to be/feel this way or that way?

Whenever i get stuck doing 'the work' i try to replace 'X' with 'MY

THINKING'...for example: Instead of 'I feel tired and

depressed. I feel desirous of sleep to come at me again'...try " MY

THINKING IS TIRED " or " MY THINKING IS DEPRESSED " or " MY THINKING IS

DESIROUS OF SLEEP TO COME AGAIN " (is it any wonder...all that

thinking is exhausting when you try to fight/catch/exam/attach to

every blasted thought that appears...kinda like walking against the

wind rather than with it...)

What is sleep? I'm not sure exactly but i do know that when i sleep

i don't think...therefore when " MY THINKING " IS IN DESPAIR, i want to

go to sleep...incidentally death is probably like going to sleep

(permantly)...imho

Be kind and gentle on yourself...and keep doing 'the work'...

Jup