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Re: sucking a thumb

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I've not dealt with this myself, so don't consider me an expert.

Thumb sucking is likely to be done as a self soothing or comfort thing hence the

referral to a psychologist. Examine the times that she is doing it. How often

is it? If she really does want to give it up then just pointing it out when you

see her doing it will help. Just keep reminding her. Try and distract her

without making a big deal out of it. She might need some other way of

comforting herself.

If she only does it at night to get to sleep then I'm not sure how to help. You

could try psinting distastful stuff, but I don't know how many people have had

success with that.

And I have no idea on the genetic or nutritional deficiency side. Can't see how

it could be, but you never know, hey?

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> Our 8-year-old daughter still sucks her thumb. We don't know what

> to

> do about that. We don't want to be " invasive " , such as plastering

> her

> her thumb. No amount of talking has done good. She replies she

> wants

> to stop, but then it is sort of automatic. Could it be masking any

> nutritional deficiency?

I don't think thumb sucking has any correlation to nutritional status.

Babies suck because it's an instinct that they need to eat and

survive. If the baby finds that it's comforting to suck, the 'habit'

continues past the infant phase as a self comfort mechanism. Early on

it is a boon to the parents because the child can comfort herself (to

some extent).

My kids used nursing as a comfort, other kids use pacifiers, bottles

or thumbs. The 1st three are easier to stop because there is another

person or object involved. My sister's daugher, who is 8, has always

sucked her thumb, and continues to do it now. From talking to my

sister and knowing my neice, and a nephew who was a big thumb-sucker,

here's my $0.02 worth: LEAVE HER ALONE.

At age 8 she's old enough that she has to stop entirely on her own.

Peer pressure and self-motivation can do that, but not if you and your

wife take responsibility for the habit. If her thumb sucking becomes a

battle ground between you and your daughter, it will cause stress,

she'll hide it and do it more than ever. Substituting another

comforting behavior for the sucking isn't really practical. What would

you have her do? chew gum, eat hard candy? twirl her hair? smoke?

There are very few socially acceptable self comforting behaviors.

My nephew, who is now old enough to drive, sucked his thumb for a

looooong time. His mother tried all the interventions out there,

including a non-removeable appliance in her son's mouth. Nothing

worked, until he was so old enough that he stopped on his own. (He

must have been 12 or 13. I'm not sure. Near the end of the habit he

only did it privately, and I didn't ask...)

That being said, your daughter is old enough to know that some

behaviors are not acceptable in public. You can give her 'permission'

to suck her thumb in private, and remind her gently if she forgets in

public. That also puts the responsibility of quitting on her, not you.

If you constantly remind her to quit and get overly involved in the

process, then you and your wife are responsible for the habit, not

her. You can also remind her (once, when you discuss this problem with

her one last time) to wash her hands before she sucks her thumb. My

nephew got round worms at least twice....

Raising kids is hard!

Jan

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Have you tried old-fashioned bribery (I mean positive motivation :-) ??

At our house, we once had to use increments of positive rewards to break a

habit. For instance, use a chart, and mark each day where the offensive habit

isn't practiced. You decide how often to reward with something she likes.

(Like small amounts of money, purchase of small item from store, etc.)

Occasionally, reward with something bigger, or more expensive. (Larger toy or

cool clothes, etc.) When the habit has been broken for 2-3 weeks, reward with

something REALLY special. -- (Trip to special place to eat, day at a theme

park, etc.)

We've only used this once, but it worked with our 5 year old.

Rebekah

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