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work on family pt.5

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i need D to take responsibility for himself. i need D to stop with the drugs

for escape when he KNOWS drugs are bullshit. i need him to heal his own

suffering. i guess i need him to do the Work, and seeee...

i need D to stop with the drugs

D SHOULDNT USE DRUGS. TRUE? REALITY? the reality is he does. so i guess

he...should.

HOW DO YOU REACT? i worry about him. i tell him to please be careful. i

feel angry and scared that he is just numbing himself to death. he wont stop,

and im feeling more numb toward him.

PEACE OR STRESS? stress.

PEACFUL REASON TO KEEP THIS THOUGHT? none. no peacful reason.

CAN YOU SEE A REASON TO DROP IT? yes, although this is one of the hardest

things.

WHO WOULD YOU BE WITHOUT THIS BELIEF? far more peacful. i let my mom

medicate herself for her arthritis, i would let D medicate himself for his pain.

yet this still feels wrong. im not getting to it.

TA> D should use drugs until he dosent. truth

TA> i should use truth. yep.

TA> i shouldnt use my thinking as a drug to numb myself. AHA!!! that's

what IM saying! thats what i feel like im doing here! im trying to numb myself

from *i shouldnt be concerned about D* with the work! that's my motive.

so, i shouldnt be concerned about D. i'll be back soon with this one.

jeremy

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