Frustrations

[Guest guest]

I've been having difficulty lately. I went home to the States to visit my mom,

but the last few days of vacation I got very depressed about coming back to

Scotland. I've been home for 3 days, and the first two were extremely difficult.

Today I finally felt better - got work done, made yummy healthy breakfast, and

went to check out a new gym that recently opened nearby. I was feeling AMAZING.

Unfortunately, after I got home I found out, on Facebook, that my ex is dating

someone new. Not only that, but she is in the same program as us in grad school.

I realized a few months back that this guy is not someone I want to be with. I'm

not at all surprised that he didn't have the consideration to tell me about his

new girlfriend before I heard it some other way. But I'm still furious. And

while at the moment I'm feeling anger, I'm sure

On the bright side, I'm not eating my feelings. On the downside, I haven't

really eaten anything. I'm not purposely trying to starve myself, but I don't

have anything easy in the house and I couldn't muster up the energy to cook.

What I'm afraid of is that this will continue. I hate being hungry, but I love

the feeling of being " in control " of myself and not eating. Unsurprisingly, this

is usually triggered by a break up or other subsequent guy drama. I'm nearly 50

lbs overweight, and yet I also worry about anorexia.