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Dear :

Josie again, if you think that telling about your granda's last week will

help you, I think it would help the other people in the group. I know when my

dad was at his end, I read someone's (I can't remember whose) account of his/her

lo's final days and it was so horrible, I couldn't think of going through

that, my dad or us. That gave me the impetus for making sure that no

extraordinary efforts be made to keep him alive. When my mom had to make the

desicion of

taking him off medicines, except for the ones that kept him comfortable, I

encouraged her to do it. She was unsure and afraid. She thought she was

sentencing him to death, but I told her that he did not have a good quality of

life

already, and that things could get much, much worse. I did not even have to

explain to her what would happen. She realized what I was talking about and

agreed with me. My dad was " near death " a week and a half before he actually

died, I was so afraid of how much he could decline every time he " came back " ,

but it only happened once.

I think it helps to know, there are fewer regrets of thinking that more could

be done to prolong life, and if it is really bad anyway, we can share it

here, knowing others went through this agony.

Love,

Josie

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