Update & Question

[Guest guest]

Hello,

My daughter, who will be 17 in a few weeks, suffers severe intrusive thoughts,

though it is partly controlled by the cocktail of meds she's on. She's never

really gotten appropriate therapy, for various reasons, though she was diagnosed

at 8. :-(

Yesterday she started Dialectical Behavior Therapy, and that seems quite

encouraging. This therapist will be focusing on giving her concrete tools to

deal with negative thoughts and feelings. I like her very much, so far. She

seems kind and friendly but also focused, directive, and to the point.

When S. finished DBT, around Christmas, I will probably try again to get her

into a CBT/ERP kind of therapy. I only found one person in the area who seemed

like a good candidiate to provide this, and she doesn't have any openings. But

in six months -- who knows?

I think DBT and CBT/ERP compliment each other well, and the skills she learns in

managing negative feelings might help her cope will CBT, which seems quite

challenging. We'll see.

She also started with a new licensed counselor. The DBT therapist requires that

a client also get " talking therapy " to deal with emotions that come up in DBT,

since her own sessions are brief and her work is focused and to the point.

My first impression of this counselor wasn't great, but S. liked her enough to

commit to 4 more sessions, so I'll stand back during the next few weeks and see

how it goes. The counselor told me she's experienced with kids with OCD and uses

CBT techniques. However, she was pretty vague about it.

And when she first met us in the waiting room (this happens to be one of my pet

peeves) she started straightening chairs and said, " Sorry -- I'm a little OCD. "

I really have a thing about people making those kind of jokes. Would anyone who

really *gets* OCD -- and has seen the suffering true obsessions and compulsions

wreak on a person's life -- make that kind of remark?

I'm skeptical, but trusting my daughter's judgement and giving it a month. On

the good side, these sessions are free(for now) since this counselor is an EAP

provider for my husband's employer. Also, I feel my daughter and I have a close

relationship, so I am hopeful I'll have a good sense of what's going on in the

DBT and talking therapy sessions and can make decisions accordingly. Here's to

hoping!

One of our biggest challenges according to the DBT therapist (and me) is that my

daughter is convinced she can't really change. After suffering OCD, without CBT,

for so long I guess that's no surprise. But it's an attitude that extends to

every area of her life. She is stuck academically, and in other ways, feeling

she can't learn new things (though she's quite bright).

I've talked to her about the positive research about cognitive therapies

(including DBT), combined with meds, for OCD and how they can actually change a

person's brain structure (per J. Schwartz's research). I've also reminded her of

the tremendous courage it has taken for her to cope with OCD this long, and all

the growth I've already seen in her. " Having watched that, I'm convinced you can

pretty much do anything. " Don't know that any of that helps.

How do you help your kids gain hope and confidence that treatment can help guide

them out of the woods and change their lives? After all, without hope, the

battle seems half lost already.

Thanks,

Steph in Virginia