Update, Some Good News, and a Question (please forward to Dr. Tamar Chansky)

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I have posted before about my difficulty finding a CBT/ERP therapist for my

daughter, who is almost 17 and was diagnosed with OCD, due to her severe

intrusive thoughts, when she was 8. She has been on meds since she was 8 and has

received a lot of counseling, but not CBT/ERP.

I started looking again recently. I only found one therapist within a 60 mile

radius who seems to be credentialed in this area: Marcella Jost, LPC. But of

course she had no openings.

I have stayed in touch with Marcella, just in case, and this week she said if we

don't mind being flexible with scheduling she'll start seeing my dd. I am

feeling encouraged by this news.

My daughter also just started DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy), another form

of CBT, to help her cope with her negative emotions.

My biggest frustration is my daughter's lack of motivation. She is willing to go

to therapy, but I have to push her to do homework assignments. I don't know

whether it's because this is more important to me than it is to her, her being a

" stubborn " teen, or because she doesn't have hope that this will make a

difference. I fear the latter.

I have been talking to her about the encouraging things I have read about

combining CBT with medications, and that this could be life changing for her --

she could actually get well and stay well. This is hard for her to imagine,

since, she's battled OCD, off and on, since she was 5 (maybe longer). And

frankly I am making myself sound more confident than I feel, because who knows

what the future holds? But I refuse to give up hope. I'm trying to keep my eye

on the goal, her blossoming into a relatively happy, confident young woman who

doesn't have to face this hell anymore.

Sadly, my daughter has said that whenever her OCD improves, she knows it will

come back (based on her experience), and she fears it is only a matter of time

before she gives up and commits suicide.

Do others struggle with lack of hope on the part of their kids and lack of

motivation to put any work into therapy? Is this a normal part of the

therapeutic process? Or, without hope and willingness to put in a lot of effort,

is this unlikely to work?

How should I be supporting her and encouraging her? Is there some particular

information I should be sharing with her? I desperately want her to succeed with

this.

Thanks!

Steph

[Guest guest]

Steph, my dd definitely struggled with these same things. She was ill for so

long and had tried so many different therapies. She absolutely gave up. She

didn't put much into DBT or the homework because she was too severely depressed

to really do so. This may be the case for your dd as well. The last thing we

tried was what worked for my dd. It was 60 day intensive inpatient where she

finally got the right med cocktail for her, the right therapies and found other

people that were as severely ill as she was. Before my dd went she had fired 5

therapists. I believe her life was changed and saved by the program she did. She

told me if that wouldn't have worked she absolutely would not be alive today. I

think, if I were you, I would just keep trying to get her to understand that she

really hasn't had the right treatment yet and this may be life changing for her.

She might not be able to see the hope until she starts trying the new therapy.

The thing for her to know also is that once she gets the proper treatment and

her symptoms return she will better be able to handle it. She will be better

equipped to handle it than she currently is. I know how hard this is. Take Care,

Stormy

________________________________

To:

Sent: Thu, June 16, 2011 8:40:39 PM

Subject: Update, Some Good News, and a Question (please

forward to Dr. Tamar Chansky)

I have been talking to her about the encouraging things I have read about

combining CBT with medications, and that this could be life changing for her --

she could actually get well and stay well. This is hard for her to imagine,

since, she's battled OCD, off and on, since she was 5 (maybe longer). And

frankly I am making myself sound more confident than I feel, because who knows

what the future holds? But I refuse to give up hope. I'm trying to keep my eye

on the goal, her blossoming into a relatively happy, confident young woman who

doesn't have to face this hell anymore.

Sadly, my daughter has said that whenever her OCD improves, she knows it will

come back (based on her experience), and she fears it is only a matter of time

before she gives up and commits suicide.

Do others struggle with lack of hope on the part of their kids and lack of

motivation to put any work into therapy? Is this a normal part of the

therapeutic process? Or, without hope and willingness to put in a lot of effort,

is this unlikely to work?

How should I be supporting her and encouraging her? Is there some particular

information I should be sharing with her? I desperately want her to succeed with

this.

Thanks!

Steph

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Stormy, I appreciate your offering me the right words. I will keep

emphasizing that it takes many people a long time to find the right treatment,

and when they do it can transform their lives. I hope and pray this is the right

treatment for my daughter, since a 60-day inpatient stay is far beyond our

means. :-) Did DBT help your daughter at all? Or did she need to be on the right

meds before any therapy could reach her?

My dd was hospitalized for about 5 days a year ago because she planned to commit

suicide. They changed all her meds, and while she still has a long way to go, it

did make a huge difference. I think for many people the pharmaceutical piece has

to be firmly in place before anything else can work.

I am glad your daughter has done so well. I know your journey must have been

exhausting and painful -- but it's been worth it.

Steph

>

> Steph, my dd definitely struggled with these same things. She was ill for so

> long and had tried so many different therapies. She absolutely gave up. She

> didn't put much into DBT or the homework because she was too severely

depressed

> to really do so. This may be the case for your dd as well. The last thing we

> tried was what worked for my dd. It was 60 day intensive inpatient where she

> finally got the right med cocktail for her, the right therapies and found

other

> people that were as severely ill as she was. Before my dd went she had fired 5

> therapists. I believe her life was changed and saved by the program she did.

She

> told me if that wouldn't have worked she absolutely would not be alive today.

I

> think, if I were you, I would just keep trying to get her to understand that

she

> really hasn't had the right treatment yet and this may be life changing for

her.

> She might not be able to see the hope until she starts trying the new therapy.

> The thing for her to know also is that once she gets the proper treatment and

> her symptoms return she will better be able to handle it. She will be better

> equipped to handle it than she currently is. I know how hard this is. Take

Care,

> Stormy

>

>

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Thu, June 16, 2011 8:40:39 PM

> Subject: Update, Some Good News, and a Question (please

> forward to Dr. Tamar Chansky)

[Guest guest]

Steph,

So sorry to hear that your daughter is feeling so hopeless. I know the CBT/ERP

has worked for us. Trick is to keep doing maintenance CBT/ERP to keep OCD away,

once it's at a manageable level. That's where my daughter has failed, and the

OCD has returned for her each time she quit doing maintenance.

I saw a few documents (study/report) in the " Files " link on this site, stating

that OCD treatment results were far better with medication/CBT combination or

CBT alone. Medication alone results seemed ess successful - in the studies I

saw. Please review some of the Files reports on results for OCD treatments. It

may make you and your daughter feel much better about the effectiveness of

CBT/ERP treatment.

It sounds very promising that the therapist in your area is able to start

working with your daughter. At the time I looked for a therapist we had 1 (ONE!)

doctor in our area who specialized in working with children with OCD. I had to

do lots of research (the OCD Foundation website's treatment provider list was

very helpful to me), including a session with another psychiatrist, to find the

specialist. We still have very few therapists/doctors here who work with OCD

teen/child patients.

As for other options, I think some others here have mentioned video treatment

sessions in CBT/ERP. A search here, or through the OCD Foundation website, might

show some other options to get CBT/ERP treatment.

I think the treatment definitely works, if the patient is willing to do it. Good

luck to you and your daughter. I hope treatment with the new therapist goes very

well and you all see success and progress soon.

Dot

>

> Hi,

>

> I have posted before about my difficulty finding a CBT/ERP therapist for my

daughter, who is almost 17 and was diagnosed with OCD, due to her severe

intrusive thoughts, when she was 8. She has been on meds since she was 8 and has

received a lot of counseling, but not CBT/ERP.

>

> I started looking again recently. I only found one therapist within a 60 mile

radius who seems to be credentialed in this area: Marcella Jost, LPC. But of

course she had no openings.

>

> I have stayed in touch with Marcella, just in case, and this week she said if

we don't mind being flexible with scheduling she'll start seeing my dd. I am

feeling encouraged by this news.

>

> My daughter also just started DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy), another form

of CBT, to help her cope with her negative emotions.

>

> My biggest frustration is my daughter's lack of motivation. She is willing to

go to therapy, but I have to push her to do homework assignments. I don't know

whether it's because this is more important to me than it is to her, her being a

" stubborn " teen, or because she doesn't have hope that this will make a

difference. I fear the latter.

>

> I have been talking to her about the encouraging things I have read about

combining CBT with medications, and that this could be life changing for her --

she could actually get well and stay well. This is hard for her to imagine,

since, she's battled OCD, off and on, since she was 5 (maybe longer). And

frankly I am making myself sound more confident than I feel, because who knows

what the future holds? But I refuse to give up hope. I'm trying to keep my eye

on the goal, her blossoming into a relatively happy, confident young woman who

doesn't have to face this hell anymore.

>

> Sadly, my daughter has said that whenever her OCD improves, she knows it will

come back (based on her experience), and she fears it is only a matter of time

before she gives up and commits suicide.

>

> Do others struggle with lack of hope on the part of their kids and lack of

motivation to put any work into therapy? Is this a normal part of the

therapeutic process? Or, without hope and willingness to put in a lot of effort,

is this unlikely to work?

>

> How should I be supporting her and encouraging her? Is there some particular

information I should be sharing with her? I desperately want her to succeed with

this.

>

> Thanks!

>

> Steph

>

[Guest guest]

Steph, I am sorry to say that DBT the first time really didn't help my dd. She

truly needed the meds right for her to benefit enough, but she has comorbid

diagnoses. She did like the group aspect. She did DBT more than once because it

was done as part of her hospitalization as well. I found it nice to connect with

other parents at DBT. Are you involved with it? Is hers a parent child class?

Ours was and that was beneficial to me. Stormy

________________________________

To:

Sent: Thu, June 16, 2011 9:24:08 PM

Subject: Re: Update, Some Good News, and a Question (please

forward to Dr. Tamar Chansky)

Thanks, Stormy, I appreciate your offering me the right words. I will keep

emphasizing that it takes many people a long time to find the right treatment,

and when they do it can transform their lives. I hope and pray this is the right

treatment for my daughter, since a 60-day inpatient stay is far beyond our

means. :-) Did DBT help your daughter at all? Or did she need to be on the right

meds before any therapy could reach her?

Steph

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..

[Guest guest]

Hi Steph, I sent this to Dr. Chansky! Will post reply when I receive.

>

> Hi,

>

> I have posted before about my difficulty finding a CBT/ERP therapist for my

daughter, who is almost 17 and was diagnosed with OCD, due to her severe

intrusive thoughts, when she was 8. She has been on meds since she was 8 and has

received a lot of counseling, but not CBT/ERP.

>

> I started looking again recently. I only found one therapist within a

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Dot!

I look forward to the day when specialists in the OCD field, who are savvy with

ERP and other CBTs, will be easy to find. It's amazing that there are so few

options.

Thanks for your encouragement. I love all the experience and wisdom on this

list.

Steph

>

> Steph,

> So sorry to hear that your daughter is feeling so hopeless. I know the CBT/ERP

has worked for us.

[Guest guest]

Stormy,

My daughter is doing individual DBT rather than group. I think that's probably

best. I'd love for my daughter meet meet others with OCD, anxiety and

depression. But I think most clients in the DBT group have borderline

personality; I doubt that would be helpful.

So far there is no parent component, though the therapist gives us a brief

summary at the end of each session. I wonder whether there is a book for parents

whose kids are going through DBT, to help us support them in the mindfulness and

so forth?

Thanks again,

Steph

>

> Steph, I am sorry to say that DBT the first time really didn't help my dd. She

> truly needed the meds right for her to benefit enough,

[Guest guest]

Thanks! I wrote it looking for feedback from the group, but then it occurred to

me that professional input would be extremely helpful.

> >

> > Hi,

> >

> > I have posted before about my difficulty finding a CBT/ERP therapist for my

daughter, who is almost 17 and was diagnosed with OCD, due to her severe

intrusive thoughts, when she was 8. She has been on meds since she was 8 and has

received a lot of counseling, but not CBT/ERP.

> >

> > I started looking again recently. I only found one therapist within a

>

[Guest guest]

I found our son was motivated to do his ERP work when he was younger, but since

he's gotten older (now 19), he is less inclined to want to do it, and becomes

annoyed at me if I try to encourage him. He's at that age where if I talk to

him, he believes I'm nagging. Teens can be challenging.

When he was younger, he was in such crisis that I think it motivated him to try

anything that would make it better.

It's difficult when they don't want to participate in something that you know

will help them feel better.

I've come to the conclusion that I can't do the therapy for him, and I can't

force him to do it. I'm curious to see what Dr. Chansky's response is, because

if she has a way to motivate a teen, I'm interested.

CBT/ERP has a very high success rate, if used properly. But, getting them to

try it, when they don't want to, can be difficult.

BJ

>

> Hi,

>

> I have posted before about my difficulty finding a CBT/ERP therapist for my

daughter, who is almost 17 and was diagnosed with OCD, due to her severe

intrusive thoughts, when she was 8. She has been on meds since she was 8 and has

received a lot of counseling, but not CBT/ERP.

>

> I started looking again recently. I only found one therapist within a 60 mile

radius who seems to be credentialed in this area: Marcella Jost, LPC. But of

course she had no openings.

>

> I have stayed in touch with Marcella, just in case, and this week she said if

we don't mind being flexible with scheduling she'll start seeing my dd. I am

feeling encouraged by this news.

>

> My daughter also just started DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy), another form

of CBT, to help her cope with her negative emotions.

>

> My biggest frustration is my daughter's lack of motivation. She is willing to

go to therapy, but I have to push her to do homework assignments. I don't know

whether it's because this is more important to me than it is to her, her being a

" stubborn " teen, or because she doesn't have hope that this will make a

difference. I fear the latter.

>

> I have been talking to her about the encouraging things I have read about

combining CBT with medications, and that this could be life changing for her --

she could actually get well and stay well. This is hard for her to imagine,

since, she's battled OCD, off and on, since she was 5 (maybe longer). And

frankly I am making myself sound more confident than I feel, because who knows

what the future holds? But I refuse to give up hope. I'm trying to keep my eye

on the goal, her blossoming into a relatively happy, confident young woman who

doesn't have to face this hell anymore.

>

> Sadly, my daughter has said that whenever her OCD improves, she knows it will

come back (based on her experience), and she fears it is only a matter of time

before she gives up and commits suicide.

>

> Do others struggle with lack of hope on the part of their kids and lack of

motivation to put any work into therapy? Is this a normal part of the

therapeutic process? Or, without hope and willingness to put in a lot of effort,

is this unlikely to work?

>

> How should I be supporting her and encouraging her? Is there some particular

information I should be sharing with her? I desperately want her to succeed with

this.

>

> Thanks!

>

> Steph

>

[Guest guest]

Steph,

Have you called Storch in Tampa? His group does ERP / CBT via Skype. You

may need to get to Tampa for initial appointment, but it's all done by Skype

after that. It is certainly an option. Not sure where you live but I hope this

will help! He is a God sent man and incradible at helping with options to get

kids into therapy.

Also, if you can go to the OCD Conference in San Diego....they have therapy for

the kids and an entire Teen Track. Meeting other kids is HUGE for these kids.

Just my thoughts for now! I too have had my kids question trying to fight since

it comes back. BUT, there's hope! Keep trying!!

>

> Hi,

>

> I have posted before about my difficulty finding a CBT/ERP therapist for my

daughter, who is almost 17 and was diagnosed with OCD, due to her severe

intrusive thoughts, when she was 8. She has been on meds since she was 8 and has

received a lot of counseling, but not CBT/ERP.

>

> I started looking again recently. I only found one therapist within a 60 mile

radius who seems to be credentialed in this area: Marcella Jost, LPC. But of

course she had no openings.

>

> I have stayed in touch with Marcella, just in case, and this week she said if

we don't mind being flexible with scheduling she'll start seeing my dd. I am

feeling encouraged by this news.

>

> My daughter also just started DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy), another form

of CBT, to help her cope with her negative emotions.

>

> My biggest frustration is my daughter's lack of motivation. She is willing to

go to therapy, but I have to push her to do homework assignments. I don't know

whether it's because this is more important to me than it is to her, her being a

" stubborn " teen, or because she doesn't have hope that this will make a

difference. I fear the latter.

>

> I have been talking to her about the encouraging things I have read about

combining CBT with medications, and that this could be life changing for her --

she could actually get well and stay well. This is hard for her to imagine,

since, she's battled OCD, off and on, since she was 5 (maybe longer). And

frankly I am making myself sound more confident than I feel, because who knows

what the future holds? But I refuse to give up hope. I'm trying to keep my eye

on the goal, her blossoming into a relatively happy, confident young woman who

doesn't have to face this hell anymore.

>

> Sadly, my daughter has said that whenever her OCD improves, she knows it will

come back (based on her experience), and she fears it is only a matter of time

before she gives up and commits suicide.

>

> Do others struggle with lack of hope on the part of their kids and lack of

motivation to put any work into therapy? Is this a normal part of the

therapeutic process? Or, without hope and willingness to put in a lot of effort,

is this unlikely to work?

>

> How should I be supporting her and encouraging her? Is there some particular

information I should be sharing with her? I desperately want her to succeed with

this.

>

> Thanks!

>

> Steph

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks, , I will definitely keep these options in mind in case the new

CBT/ERP therapist doesn't work out.

I am tempted by the conference, but feel the trip would be too expensive,

especially since we live on the East coast. :-)

Steph

>

>

> Steph,

> Have you called Storch in Tampa? His group does ERP / CBT via Skype. You

may need to get to Tampa for initial appointment, but it's all done by Skype

after that. It is certainly an option. Not sure where you live but I hope this

will help! He is a God sent man and incradible at helping with options to get

kids into therapy.

>

> Also, if you can go to the OCD Conference in San Diego....they have therapy

for the kids and an entire Teen Track. Meeting other kids is HUGE for these

kids.

>

> Just my thoughts for now! I too have had my kids question trying to fight

since it comes back. BUT, there's hope! Keep trying!!

>