Guest guest Posted June 28, 2010 Report Share Posted June 28, 2010 My dd is 14 and I just discovered today that the reason she has always been pretty much unable to clean her room is that as she starts cleaning she goes through everything and finds a lot of things that bring up bad memories, bad thoughts etc and make her anxious. In the past i have usually let her room get so messy and cluttered until I cant stand it and go in alone and get it all cleaned up, then I get resentful because she is a big girl and I feel like she should clean her room herself, well now I understand what the problem is but what do I do? Keep cleaning her room, or leave it a mess? I suggested she empty it out (all the books, toys etc etc) and keep it clean but I dont think that is realistic. Melinda Tn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 28, 2010 Report Share Posted June 28, 2010 My daughter too is overwhelmed with cleaning, organizing and throwing out. I try to stay with my daughter and help her clean up and organize her room usually once a week (during the school year it is on Sat morning). Often she sits with me and says she can't do it without my help. I talk to her about things that I can see are problems for her. She has issues with hoarding and chronic disorganization. When she is fearful I try to stay put with just that one object and try to desensitize her, and then help her get rid of it. That would be it one object that triggers fear to work on at a time. The rest I just put away or store away to work on later or get rid of myself. But my understanding with anxiety and hoarding is that I shouldn't be doing too much of the work myself or by myself. When kids or people are somewhat depressed they seem to remember vividly the bad parts of a school year, a relationship, a vacation etc. If possible in the future try to work on scrap booking what went well. My daughter seemed to have a gloomy or anxious view on so many things prior to medication. I also have her focus on how she wants to decorate her room. She has a theme going with a betta fish and bonsai tree that is asian (she is only 12 too). I have to work on the positive of what she wants it too look like and budget for decorations (posters etc) and try to keep her mind off ruminating on anxious or negative thoughts. I do think medication helped her. Pam Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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