Things are getting worse - wheres the help!

[Guest guest]

well, my son has been getting worse, blaming, shouting, abusing us at every

possibility. Last night he punched me in the face, this morning whilst thinking

of what to say to work he shouted further abuse. Even though my face is blown

up and I have two black eyes he seems to show no remorse, we have not had the

support we were promised, as I said in another message he had been prescribed

prozep which caused side effects and a rash, the psychiatrist was less than

helpful and insisted he continue and increase, of course he didnot and we

supported this but then that was it, the clinical nurse went off with stress and

the psychiatrist rather than look at alternative medication referred him to a

psychologist. the appointment is this week but its too little too late, I am

scared they will insist on sectioning him to a mental health ward but also

scared of the anger he is demonstrating. where has my son gone, he was so fun

loving and happy as a youngster all he does know is blame us for everything. I

just desperately need to talk to someone.

[Guest guest]

(((hugs))) I am soooo sorry!!!

I might have stopped the Prozac too what with the rash. Did his anger get worse

on it too? I mean was this anger, where he hit you, there before it or do you

think things are just progressing to " worse " on their own?

I think with the violence they may suggest hospitalizing him, but really the

main thing there would be for them to find medication that will work, stabilize

him, get that anger/other behavior under control, then they'd release him to

local mental health to follow up with monitoring and therapy. As hard as that

is (with 3 sons I can imagine how I'd feel) that may be your best choice - and

best for him too - with him getting so physical and not showing remorse, etc.

What is he blaming you for? Or rather, is his blaming all OCD related (ex -

you're contaminating things, or not doing what his OCD tells him you need to

do...)?

Doesn't sound like the psychiatrist was helpful. Some are just " that way " . I

would think he would have at least " grudgingly " changed medication. He seems to

be the type that if you're not going to do as he suggests, then he just drops

you. Hope the psychologist will be better! Do let us know how that

appointment goes.

Can you walk away when he gets confrontational?

>

> well, my son has been getting worse, blaming, shouting, abusing us at every

possibility. Last night he punched me in the face, this morning whilst thinking

of what to say to work he shouted further abuse. Even though my face is blown

up and I have two black eyes he seems to show no remorse, we have not had the

support we were

[Guest guest]

hi chris,  the strange thing is the Prozep appeared to calm him but the side

effects were too concerning.  My son was saying that he wanted to OCD to stop

and the Prozep wasn't doing that.  He had asked if the medication would change

him and felt that the side effects were changing him.  so the medication had to

stop.

it would appear when talking to the psychologist over the phone that the

psychiatrist wasn't entirely truthful, he said there was a long waiting list for

the psychologist when in fact they had spaces.  so the psychology treatment

could have started a lot earlier.  Don't know why the psychiatrist did this,

maybe on commission LOL.  Not really funny, but trying to find humour anywhere

at the moment.

My son doesn;t talk to us so I don;t know what part we play in his rituals. Last

night I just wanted to hug him and say we are here but we can;t at the moment

its as if we live separate lives only coming together when he wants

confrontation.  I have tried to walk away but he follows me and if I go into

another room he stands banging and shouting until I come out.

thanks for your kind words. J.

________________________________

To:

Sent: Tuesday, 3 August, 2010 2:49:17

Subject: Re: Things are getting worse - wheres the help!

 

(((hugs))) I am soooo sorry!!!

I might have stopped the Prozac too what with the rash. Did his anger get worse

on it too? I mean was this anger, where he hit you, there before it or do you

think things are just progressing to " worse " on their own?

I think with the violence they may suggest hospitalizing him, but really the

main thing there would be for them to find medication that will work, stabilize

him, get that anger/other behavior under control, then they'd release him to

local mental health to follow up with monitoring and therapy. As hard as that is

(with 3 sons I can imagine how I'd feel) that may be your best choice - and best

for him too - with him getting so physical and not showing remorse, etc.

What is he blaming you for? Or rather, is his blaming all OCD related (ex -

you're contaminating things, or not doing what his OCD tells him you need to

do...)?

Doesn't sound like the psychiatrist was helpful. Some are just " that way " . I

would think he would have at least " grudgingly " changed medication. He seems to

be the type that if you're not going to do as he suggests, then he just drops

you. Hope the psychologist will be better! Do let us know how that appointment

goes.

Can you walk away when he gets confrontational?

>

> well, my son has been getting worse, blaming, shouting, abusing us at every

>possibility. Last night he punched me in the face, this morning whilst thinking

>of what to say to work he shouted further abuse. Even though my face is blown

up

>and I have two black eyes he seems to show no remorse, we have not had the

>support we were

>

[Guest guest]

Just jumping in, not having read previous posts you may have made.

Was your son behaving this way before he started the prozak? The aggression can

come with just the OCD, but the medication can amp it up further.

Since you say that the prozak also seemed to help it would make sense to try

another ssri. Ours had a big reaction to prozak, and I was told is is one of

the more activating of the ssri's. It is worth trying others to find something

that works for the OCD with less side effects.

It sounds like you are dealing with some extreme behavior, and that your son

really needs some help to cope with the OCD. I really hope you can get into the

psychologist soon and push for a new med trial with the psychiatrist - perhaps

the psychologist can help you with this!

Our son blamed us too. They need to get it out too, and you are the closest

person to vent at! Also think they are desperate to have someone " fix " it, and

usually that's a parents job, so how come you aren't fixing it for them???(their

feelings). Just like we will lash out at the doctors when they aren't helping,

our kids lash out at us. Try not to take that part personally.

Ours showed no remorse either, he was " locked " in with the OCD and had no room

for anyone or anything else, at the worst point. This is not really who they

are, they are just taken over by the OCD.

The physical attacks are just not acceptable. There needs to be clear

boundaries on this. Again, I don't know the whole story and how long this has

gone on, but this needs to be handled. If your son truly does not have any self

control then perhaps he needs hospitalization for assessment and stabilization

on medication.

Is there any possibility of any other disorders, such as bipolar? SSRI's can

trigger bipolar symptoms, or indeed uncover the disorder not previously

diagnosed. If bipolar is truly present a mood stabilizer is needed. Just a

thought in case you are not aware. We went through this with our son, bipolar

genetics in our family, ssri's at higher doses tripped off bipolar symptoms.

Truly hope you get some help soon!!

Warmly,

Barb

Son 19, OCD/LD/Spectrum disorders - doing well now for 2 years.

>

> well, my son has been getting worse, blaming, shouting, abusing us at every

possibility. Last night he punched me in the face, this morning whilst thinking

of what to say to work he shouted further abuse. Even though my face is blown

up and I have two black eyes he seems to show no remorse, we have not had the

support we were promised, as I said in another message he had been prescribed

prozep which caused side effects and a rash, the psychiatrist was less than

helpful and insisted he continue and increase, of course he didnot and we

supported this but then that was it, the clinical nurse went off with stress and

the psychiatrist rather than look at alternative medication referred him to a

psychologist. the appointment is this week but its too little too late, I am

scared they will insist on sectioning him to a mental health ward but also

scared of the anger he is demonstrating. where has my son gone, he was so fun

loving and happy as a youngster all he does know is blame us for everything. I

just desperately need to talk to someone.

>

[Guest guest]

Very sorry things are SO difficult right now. I didn't see where you said your

son's age but I agree that if he is old enough to leave, you might try actually

driving away. Our dd is now 17 OCD/GAD and went through years of raging, verbal

abuse, blaming us for all manner of things, shoving , hitting, throwing and

breaking things. She would follow us as in order to keep confronting. At times

I loaded up the other children and left. She was sometimes destructive (to our

bedroom for example) but usually calmed down with no one around to keep

engaging.

She did go through a period of suicidal thoughts and talked about it alot so

during that season I did not leave for her own protection, but did try very had

to not engage while she was raging.

She is on 175 mg. of Zoloft. Our psychiatrist gave us the number of the mental

health division of the police dept. to call in emergencies. They are trained to

handle situations that the " regular " police are not. Sounds like you might need

that option if he is physically attacking you.

may you find a measure of peace and a bright spot tomorrow!

Janet

Re: Things are getting worse - wheres the help!

The following, when you try to walk away. . . Our son did that. For him, it was

his OCD. He NEEDED to have " whatever was going on in his mind " completed. Very

frustrating when you can't get away. There were times where I threatened to

leave the house if he did not let me be. Is that a possibility for you? (Not

sure how old he is) That seemed to work for us.

So sorry to hear it is going SO badly.

No, nothing funny, but sometimes we laugh to keep from crying. . Again! You find

you cope however you can.

So, I didn't see if you mentioned (might have overlooked it) if they were going

to accept trying a different med. Is that a possibility?

BJ

>

> hi chris, the strange thing is the Prozep appeared to calm him but the side

> effects were too concerning. My son was saying that he wanted to OCD to

stop

> and the Prozep wasn't doing that. He had asked if the medication would

change

> him and felt that the side effects were changing him. so the medication had

to

> stop.

>

> it would appear when talking to the psychologist over the phone that the

> psychiatrist wasn't entirely truthful, he said there was a long waiting list

for

> the psychologist when in fact they had spaces. so the psychology treatment

> could have started a lot earlier. Don't know why the psychiatrist did

this,

> maybe on commission LOL. Not really funny, but trying to find humour

anywhere

> at the moment.

>

>

> My son doesn;t talk to us so I don;t know what part we play in his rituals.

Last

> night I just wanted to hug him and say we are here but we can;t at the moment

> its as if we live separate lives only coming together when he wants

> confrontation. I have tried to walk away but he follows me and if I go into

> another room he stands banging and shouting until I come out.

>

> thanks for your kind words. J.