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That's totally understandable. I hate dealing with people who don't

speak clearly, I have enough hearing issues as it is.

Debi

>

> Debbie the nurses of her office are usually good ones who know of me

> but this new one is of asian and speaks much fast in broken circles

> of words that cause me to feel confused and in rapid shipts of no

> longer knwowing within me my own thinking and feelings and so then

> cant communicate anymore. I to wanted to speak to my doctor when she

> came in over this but the nurse came in with the doctor so did not

> know how to address it without being seen as a rude or offensive

> person.

> Sondra

>

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Sondra

I am so sorry to read of all you have been going through. I can't add to the

really good advice others have given, but just wanted to say I'm thinking of

you and sending healing and peaceful thoughts.

Melinda

************************************** See what's free at http://www.aol.com.

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Sondra

I am so sorry to read of all you have been going through. I can't add to the

really good advice others have given, but just wanted to say I'm thinking of

you and sending healing and peaceful thoughts.

Melinda

************************************** See what's free at http://www.aol.com.

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Yes for me I to think I to need much more time to process but felt in

many ways she was struggling as much as me in this communication

because we both spoke a true to self dialect, but was trying both of

us to speak the grammar expected which was of a barrier for us both.

I to think that is why she kept asking over and over the same

questions and or later repeating back incorect informations to me as

if I to sayed that to her. it was of quite frustrating . I to went

back to my medical and shared ofmy concern and found she was a

student nurse cycling though and that she was not stayingas part of

thier team but a student learning and that caused me great releif.

Even when she checked of my kidneys she pounded so hard it hurt me as

if being socked I to think this nurse will not make it far unless she

gets some strong interventions to her approaches and language.

After she pounded my kidneys she to say does this hurt . I to say yes

much so/////not thinking on terms of it until later. I to be refered

to her hitting me and she probably thinking the kidneys still hurted

me LOL . But happy will not have to worry over her to be of my nurse

anymore.

Sondra

In Autism_in_Girls , " Debi " wrote:

>

> That's totally understandable. I hate dealing with people who don't

> speak clearly, I have enough hearing issues as it is.

>

> Debi

>

>

> >

> > Debbie the nurses of her office are usually good ones who know of

me

> > but this new one is of asian and speaks much fast in broken

circles

> > of words that cause me to feel confused and in rapid shipts of no

> > longer knwowing within me my own thinking and feelings and so

then

> > cant communicate anymore. I to wanted to speak to my doctor when

she

> > came in over this but the nurse came in with the doctor so did

not

> > know how to address it without being seen as a rude or offensive

> > person.

> > Sondra

> >

>

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Yes for me I to think I to need much more time to process but felt in

many ways she was struggling as much as me in this communication

because we both spoke a true to self dialect, but was trying both of

us to speak the grammar expected which was of a barrier for us both.

I to think that is why she kept asking over and over the same

questions and or later repeating back incorect informations to me as

if I to sayed that to her. it was of quite frustrating . I to went

back to my medical and shared ofmy concern and found she was a

student nurse cycling though and that she was not stayingas part of

thier team but a student learning and that caused me great releif.

Even when she checked of my kidneys she pounded so hard it hurt me as

if being socked I to think this nurse will not make it far unless she

gets some strong interventions to her approaches and language.

After she pounded my kidneys she to say does this hurt . I to say yes

much so/////not thinking on terms of it until later. I to be refered

to her hitting me and she probably thinking the kidneys still hurted

me LOL . But happy will not have to worry over her to be of my nurse

anymore.

Sondra

In Autism_in_Girls , " Debi " wrote:

>

> That's totally understandable. I hate dealing with people who don't

> speak clearly, I have enough hearing issues as it is.

>

> Debi

>

>

> >

> > Debbie the nurses of her office are usually good ones who know of

me

> > but this new one is of asian and speaks much fast in broken

circles

> > of words that cause me to feel confused and in rapid shipts of no

> > longer knwowing within me my own thinking and feelings and so

then

> > cant communicate anymore. I to wanted to speak to my doctor when

she

> > came in over this but the nurse came in with the doctor so did

not

> > know how to address it without being seen as a rude or offensive

> > person.

> > Sondra

> >

>

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some better but not as well as wish could be. have to go to get of

ultra sound of the gall bladder on the 6th. feeling very sedated, and

sleepy even though not able to find good sound sleep. teh legs of me

are of hurting and the hips are much so too. have not really been out

for my walking times. yesterday attempted to go and got half way

though and felt so exhausted afterwards. I to be of feeling

frustrated. test results have not come in yet. I to feel they will be

of negative as most test are and yet lack any real reasons for such

symptoms I to have much so but off and on tehy get intense and more

severe. Anyways going to see a DAN doctor in November it is of

costly but will go regardless because need to have of answers to my

medical things.

Today is of a real off day and find self more internal within me

andlocked there and find connecting very hard and fragmented as if in

a deep mental fog. easily distracted by visual stimming and

repetative words and sounds the odd ritualized movements and actions

are strong today too. cant seem to find a real connection for long as

tend to just drift back to this place within me without warning just

keep finding self tehre/

I to lack why some days can be so connected and in tune and other

days so fragmented and scattered never understand that in me but it

is of ever so true of me. I to tend to wake one way or the other, bu

the fogs can last for a few days and be gone again. dont know what

causes them to come or to go?

Sondra

Sondra

In Autism_in_Girls , Crystal Breger

wrote:

>

> Glad to hear she won't be your nurse anymore!

>

> How have you been feeling?

>

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> Crystal B

> http://www.myspace.com/breger3

> http://bethpuzzle.blogspot.com/

> http://www.youravon.com/cbreger

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Guest guest

some better but not as well as wish could be. have to go to get of

ultra sound of the gall bladder on the 6th. feeling very sedated, and

sleepy even though not able to find good sound sleep. teh legs of me

are of hurting and the hips are much so too. have not really been out

for my walking times. yesterday attempted to go and got half way

though and felt so exhausted afterwards. I to be of feeling

frustrated. test results have not come in yet. I to feel they will be

of negative as most test are and yet lack any real reasons for such

symptoms I to have much so but off and on tehy get intense and more

severe. Anyways going to see a DAN doctor in November it is of

costly but will go regardless because need to have of answers to my

medical things.

Today is of a real off day and find self more internal within me

andlocked there and find connecting very hard and fragmented as if in

a deep mental fog. easily distracted by visual stimming and

repetative words and sounds the odd ritualized movements and actions

are strong today too. cant seem to find a real connection for long as

tend to just drift back to this place within me without warning just

keep finding self tehre/

I to lack why some days can be so connected and in tune and other

days so fragmented and scattered never understand that in me but it

is of ever so true of me. I to tend to wake one way or the other, bu

the fogs can last for a few days and be gone again. dont know what

causes them to come or to go?

Sondra

Sondra

In Autism_in_Girls , Crystal Breger

wrote:

>

> Glad to hear she won't be your nurse anymore!

>

> How have you been feeling?

>

>

>

>

> Crystal B

> http://www.myspace.com/breger3

> http://bethpuzzle.blogspot.com/

> http://www.youravon.com/cbreger

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  • 3 months later...

>

> I to just be to applied to be to come back to list but not on yet so

> asked daughter if can post it from her name and so am of posting to

> say I to be hope to be back here of soon.

> I to also be to have great sad as if any to know of her Patty clark to

> passed away this morning due to serious issues of stroke. This cause

> ofme to have much wet eyes and so have sad much so this day and felt

> the need to be to connect to friends.

> I to also be to leave for vacations on the 25 and will not be of back

> until the 2 of Aug. then after that my speaking is to be to build up

> and keep me much busy.

> My daughter Aimee is on list now too but is not posting yet. she is of

> zoologynut2. She is 17 , will be of 18 in October and is dx with AS

> and bipolar and has much anxiety and depressions.

> Sondra

Sondra,

I only recently returned to the board, after more

than a year. We have had a very traumatic time with my daughter's health

which has pretty much kept us isolated (tinnitus) But now again, I've

had the pleasure to read everyone's beautiful, caring messages of loving

compassion and the understanding that comes only from true adversity and

suffering. When I think that after all you've been through, and are

still suffering- that you have been such a source of strength, hope and

inspiration for so many, try to hold on to the knowlege that God is with

you, that He is using you for a mighty cause, and because we're in the

flesh, periods of pain and discouragement will come. You are NEVER

alone, and are loved and admired by more than you can imagine. I

remember you once emailed me separately to speak of faith. and I know

that faith and gentle spirit will keep you through every storm, Sondra

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Joni wanted to say read of you post but the one attached to it was of a

very old post. was wondering if it was a odd glitch of the list or was

of you reading from archives and responding to a post of me from long

time past.

as for me not know any way but to live inthe survival mode in life so I

to just find ways to work through the scary things and unknwn things

and work to find some sore of sense of life to me. right now getting

over some flu like things and so just feeling some better today bt

still ahve of a headache things.

Sondra

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Sondra,

You made me laugh talking to your boy bunny and he just twitching his nose at

you. I could see this in my mind, and it made me smile. :)

To: Autism_in_Girls@...: hfa2@...: Sun, 16 Sep

2007 15:26:48 +0000Subject: sondra

just getting over a flu like spell of not being well. today so far feel of

better but did have that yesterday too feeled good for a short time and then

began of the nausea and sweating and much exhusted time. so rested much

yesterday in my office. I to also discovered my baby mini lops are of not both

girl babies and I to be asked of the pet person to make of sure that they were

of this but the husband shared he caught of them mating when was in michigan so

now I to might be to have of baby bunnies and so have to research how long they

are to be of to carry babies before they come and if they need to be of

separated in their own cages now. So pumkin is of a boy tricking me to think he

was of a girl one. I to had a long talk of words to him and he just stared at me

and twitched of hims nose to me as if not worried ofhims own actions. But the

two bunnies do bring me much happy and calm feelings within me. I to be of

speaking to a conference that has around 1000 registered so this is of causing

me some overwhelm feeling already but feel the speak is of well rehearsed for me

so will do okay once get use to the movement and sounds of the people. sondra

_________________________________________________________________

Discover the new Windows Vista

http://search.msn.com/results.aspx?q=windows+vista & mkt=en-US & form=QBRE

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>

> Joni wanted to say read of you post but the one attached to it was of

a

> very old post. was wondering if it was a odd glitch of the list or

was

> of you reading from archives and responding to a post of me from long

> time past.

>

> as for me not know any way but to live inthe survival mode in life so

I

> to just find ways to work through the scary things and unknwn things

> and work to find some sore of sense of life to me. right now getting

> over some flu like things and so just feeling some better today bt

> still ahve of a headache things.

> Sondra

Dear Sondra,

When I realized I had responded to an old post, I felt

so DUMB!! I need lessons for navigating on these sites! But

nevertheless, you can see how well loved you are on this board, and I

am just so glad you are beyond that rough spot. I'm so sorry about your

friend, Sondra. Prayers and warm wishes, Joan-'s mom

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and he is of still not listening to my words to him. he is of a

cute bunny but is of a stubborn little man. He is of so cute this day

with one ear lopped down and the other ear straight up. He sometimes

yawns a huge yawn to me. When I to open the cage door he peeks out

and brings of hims nose to my own nose and smells of me. the female

one is of more shy but will do this too. I to plan to build of them a

huge outside pen this coming week or so. the son and hims friend and

the husband will build of it for me. it will be with much play areas

for both to have of good air and exercise. And then if cold or not

good weather they can be inside of the cage in my office. I to like

ot watch of them cuddle and groom of each others.

I to be to still battle of some crazy virus and so it is of not

making me as active to things as usual, but in some times of the day

do have of energy to do somethings. I to think will take of a walk

later to get of exercise and fresh airs to me too.

The son that graduated this summer is working much now and loves of

hims job working for the attorney general. He is of making good

moneys and is of in an internship. He just buyed hims own frist car

this weekend. He is of doing well in life. He is of moving out in a

few weeks to live with a buddy friend while they both do of collage

and learn of life. sondra

>

>

> Sondra,

>

> You made me laugh talking to your boy bunny and he just twitching

his nose at you. I could see this in my mind, and it made me

smile. :)

>

>

>

>

> To: Autism_in_Girls@...: hfa2@...: Sun, 16 Sep 2007 15:26:48

+0000Subject: sondra

>

>

>

>

> just getting over a flu like spell of not being well. today so far

feel of better but did have that yesterday too feeled good for a

short time and then began of the nausea and sweating and much

exhusted time. so rested much yesterday in my office. I to also

discovered my baby mini lops are of not both girl babies and I to be

asked of the pet person to make of sure that they were of this but

the husband shared he caught of them mating when was in michigan so

now I to might be to have of baby bunnies and so have to research how

long they are to be of to carry babies before they come and if they

need to be of separated in their own cages now. So pumkin is of a boy

tricking me to think he was of a girl one. I to had a long talk of

words to him and he just stared at me and twitched of hims nose to me

as if not worried ofhims own actions. But the two bunnies do bring me

much happy and calm feelings within me. I to be of speaking to a

conference that has around 1000 registered so this is of causing me

some overwhelm feeling already but feel the speak is of well

rehearsed for me so will do okay once get use to the movement and

sounds of the people. sondra

>

>

>

>

>

>

> _________________________________________________________________

> Discover the new Windows Vista

> http://search.msn.com/results.aspx?q=windows+vista & mkt=en-

US & form=QBRE

>

>

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  • 2 months later...

just be to letting peooles kow I to got of home and trying hard to

just be of cope things. I to go to have lower scope tomorrow so

building in the upset over the sensory issues of having to drink of 4

liters of the medicines things. for me this is of very intrusive as

my sensory cant even stand of the smell or scent of things let alone

to drink of it.

I to be to had seen of my therapist this day. too much pains, fears

and things I to lack words for rightnow. Only shared in brief of the

marriage issues but they aremuch more severe than the post I to gave

and yet want of others to kow ther is not pyscial abuse to me he has

never been to hit or hurt of me in that fashions so safe in regards

to that. wanted to say of thanks for all teh supporting of the

peoples here to help of me when in that crisis and throughteh fears

and many off line helped give me words to things did not understand

thanks for that. But anyways not want to be fo posting because need f

to be self isolated for a time to gain of strength to cope of peoples

again.

People push of us ot gain in relationships and people and yet for me

all of life I to find when I to do of this and try so very hard but

relationships to me are like putting hand into the fire place and and

letting the fire burn off teh hand . do it enough times you learn to

avoid that fire. I to ahve come to that place. NOt seeking a sorry

tome but just simply share of how life feels to me in regards to teh

thinking that life isof better if one has of friends or people in the

life of them , but for me it is of like a death sentence. I to be of

not want of that anymore. I to prefer to post of words to internet

away from teh reality fo peoples in a real sense of peoples.

\Sondra

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Sondra, I'm glad to know you're home. I pray the liquid goes down

easily and does what it is supposed to do with little discomfort and

that the scope is over quickly for you. Will be thinking about you and

praying you through it tonight and tomorrow. You can begin to sort

everything else out after the medical tests and a weekend of rest.

PennY

>

> just be to letting peooles kow I to got of home and trying hard to

> just be of cope things. > \Sondra

>

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Sondra, I'm glad to know you're home. I pray the liquid goes down

easily and does what it is supposed to do with little discomfort and

that the scope is over quickly for you. Will be thinking about you and

praying you through it tonight and tomorrow. You can begin to sort

everything else out after the medical tests and a weekend of rest.

PennY

>

> just be to letting peooles kow I to got of home and trying hard to

> just be of cope things. > \Sondra

>

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Sondra, I am so glad that you made it home safely. I am sorry that you

have to drink that stuff. Keep us posted on how you are doing. MY

prayers are with you about everything.

Shanna ('s mom)

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shanna thank you much for all the supports and help to me in this.

someday this summer will come to you areas now that I to know how to

do that since not know that 65 south can go from ohio al the way to

alabama LOL but I to guess everybody learns of things. I to be of set

to speak in Kentucky in march? but forget where at an autism center

or place there. It will be of on a saturday when I to come and speak

of there.

so happy that drinking stuff is of over, never know how one who is

more involved with autism how the parents get of that stuff down them

to do the tests. It maked me sick, gagged much and could not do it

all and only drank half the total amount was suppose to drink. but

could not foce self to drink anymore.

will be not self for much of two days as this day and tomorrow it

will make of me be of a loopy person. My blood sugars are dropping

and so am of frstrated and much agitated this am. I to want of no one

into my space and get overload by them if they are because of the

intense need to eat.

I to posted a post on the mad moms but it got lost lately when I to

go to send the page comes up saying things like sorry the page could

not be accessed which means my connections to the net was lost or

droped low and lost of it and so this is of causing me too much

stress.

I to be went to my Dr. Amigos yesterday. feeling more grounded some.

when i to be of in this state of being it is wen my writing of words

comes out in profound ways so been of creating and epxressing of the

inner process of me into words for more new poetry. I to think this

part of my brain gets connected when too many negative emotions are

swarming inside of me and cant sort or sift them, label them outside

of echoing what others share to me should be feeling. such as one

person shared to me that the things I to shared to her in very

private over the husband would make of her much angry .... that let

me then say I to ave anger,,,, but do I to really feel anger I to

lack but maybe the I to do and just cant interpret it and or name it

for self. but I to know negative and positive emotions for me can

feel pervasive and that pervasive feling can cause a negative

reaction. such as sometimes when get too excited of happy over a

positive things my brain surges and wants to pinch and bite as a

release of that powerful feelings in me. so it an be of confusing to

read of me and really label an emotion for self because they come out

so different than the way NT label of them. I to know when feeling

what others have teached me is frustration I to tend to hit of self

in the head with fists and have multiple complex hand and arm and leg

movements , maybe it is of frustration I to feel but not sure again

have learned to label it as such. for me it is of a begin of labeling

for some things in ways that maybe NTs can identify and or relate

with, so it can offer an understand or compassions to the reactions

of me.

right now I to really feel nothings as if the brain of me is of wipe

clean of the thinking and nothing is of there in my thinking and yet

I to think it is because of the pervasive overload of feelings causes

of me to shut down inside of me.

Anyways tired and the tummy hurts and is of so hungry need to try to

lay down again to rest before I to go in. I to be have to be of there

by noon this day. they will not be to find anythings they never to do

except the last time they found multiple small canker like sores and

had no ideas to them so was not given a dx or treatment as they felt

maybe they were of just harmless.

Sondra

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shanna thank you much for all the supports and help to me in this.

someday this summer will come to you areas now that I to know how to

do that since not know that 65 south can go from ohio al the way to

alabama LOL but I to guess everybody learns of things. I to be of set

to speak in Kentucky in march? but forget where at an autism center

or place there. It will be of on a saturday when I to come and speak

of there.

so happy that drinking stuff is of over, never know how one who is

more involved with autism how the parents get of that stuff down them

to do the tests. It maked me sick, gagged much and could not do it

all and only drank half the total amount was suppose to drink. but

could not foce self to drink anymore.

will be not self for much of two days as this day and tomorrow it

will make of me be of a loopy person. My blood sugars are dropping

and so am of frstrated and much agitated this am. I to want of no one

into my space and get overload by them if they are because of the

intense need to eat.

I to posted a post on the mad moms but it got lost lately when I to

go to send the page comes up saying things like sorry the page could

not be accessed which means my connections to the net was lost or

droped low and lost of it and so this is of causing me too much

stress.

I to be went to my Dr. Amigos yesterday. feeling more grounded some.

when i to be of in this state of being it is wen my writing of words

comes out in profound ways so been of creating and epxressing of the

inner process of me into words for more new poetry. I to think this

part of my brain gets connected when too many negative emotions are

swarming inside of me and cant sort or sift them, label them outside

of echoing what others share to me should be feeling. such as one

person shared to me that the things I to shared to her in very

private over the husband would make of her much angry .... that let

me then say I to ave anger,,,, but do I to really feel anger I to

lack but maybe the I to do and just cant interpret it and or name it

for self. but I to know negative and positive emotions for me can

feel pervasive and that pervasive feling can cause a negative

reaction. such as sometimes when get too excited of happy over a

positive things my brain surges and wants to pinch and bite as a

release of that powerful feelings in me. so it an be of confusing to

read of me and really label an emotion for self because they come out

so different than the way NT label of them. I to know when feeling

what others have teached me is frustration I to tend to hit of self

in the head with fists and have multiple complex hand and arm and leg

movements , maybe it is of frustration I to feel but not sure again

have learned to label it as such. for me it is of a begin of labeling

for some things in ways that maybe NTs can identify and or relate

with, so it can offer an understand or compassions to the reactions

of me.

right now I to really feel nothings as if the brain of me is of wipe

clean of the thinking and nothing is of there in my thinking and yet

I to think it is because of the pervasive overload of feelings causes

of me to shut down inside of me.

Anyways tired and the tummy hurts and is of so hungry need to try to

lay down again to rest before I to go in. I to be have to be of there

by noon this day. they will not be to find anythings they never to do

except the last time they found multiple small canker like sores and

had no ideas to them so was not given a dx or treatment as they felt

maybe they were of just harmless.

Sondra

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  • 2 weeks later...

Sondra

I am so sorry you burned your mouth and throat. That can be very painful.

Please try to drink lots of water as you heal, and if you can tolerate it have

some pure honey. I hope you feel better soon,

Melinda

**************************************See AOL's top rated recipes

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

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Sondra

I am so sorry you burned your mouth and throat. That can be very painful.

Please try to drink lots of water as you heal, and if you can tolerate it have

some pure honey. I hope you feel better soon,

Melinda

**************************************See AOL's top rated recipes

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

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HOw long will it be to get better because tonight now I to b eof

getting fevered some from it. My body reacts to pain in stress ways

that causes the immune system to react in fever ways.

Sondra

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HOw long will it be to get better because tonight now I to b eof

getting fevered some from it. My body reacts to pain in stress ways

that causes the immune system to react in fever ways.

Sondra

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I hate to say it but I did this once and it took DAYS to heal, I

remember feeling like it took forever for the pain to go away- I did

not burn my esophogous just my whole mouth with refried beans and it

was all I could talk about and I couldn't eat anything for two days and

still tenderly ate after that...

The honey sounds like a good idea to boost healing...

>

> HOw long will it be to get better because tonight now I to b eof

> getting fevered some from it. My body reacts to pain in stress ways

> that causes the immune system to react in fever ways.

> Sondra

>

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