Re: My son's OCD made him think I was contaminated - now my wife & son have left me

[Guest guest]

My son is extremely private about his OCD so I am unsure what type of OCD he has

but it does at times control our lives. The anxiety he suffers causes great

stress in the family and arguments are extreme which drive me and my husband

apart at times. We love him dearly but his demands at times are unrealistic,

he needs to be constantly " entertained " I believe this is down to him thinking

too much without a distraction, however, it costs a lot to entertain a 14 year

old all the time. So we are also experiencing financial issues as well. He is

14 years and was diagnosed 3 months ago but it would appear had OCD from a much

younger age, again we both feel upset because we should have noticed earlier.

Did your son struggle at school because ours is unable to attend at the moment,

stresses that he wants to but just can't we have a medical education person

coming tomorrow to talk about home tuitoring, a bit late as he has been off

school for several months and he has stated that he is not happy about it, so at

least we are pre-warned that tommorow will be a difficult day with lots of

arguments before and after she attends.

I am sorry to read that your family have separated as a result of OCD but can

emphasis with how difficult this issue is and how it controls not just the

person suffering from it but everyone around.

Jacqui - Worcestershire, England.

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please.

>

> I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

>

> My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

>

> 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

>

> Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

>

> I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that OCD

had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I. (Up

to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

>

> Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

>

> From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and have

been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

>

> My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

>

> I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my wife

and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please

>

> " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

>

[Guest guest]

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please.

>

> I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

>

> My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

>

> 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

>

> Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

>

> I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that OCD

had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I. (Up

to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

>

> Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

>

> From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and have

been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

>

> My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

>

> I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my wife

and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please

>

> " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

>

Hi ,

Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you have found yourself in such a

horrible situation.

I am separated from my wife and our daughter spends equal time between the two

of us. We will all understand how devastated you feel, OCD is so isolating for

everyone involved. My daughter often says she needs a hug and when I move near

her says she can't because I am contaminated, so I have some insight into how

you are feeling.

I'm sorry I can't offer any help, I know there are people on here that will be

more qualified to do that, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

Big hugs

Mike.

London U.K

[Guest guest]

Hugs to you Mike. I feel for you.

>

>

>

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> >

> > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

> >

> > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> >

> > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

> >

> > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

> >

> > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> >

> > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> >

> > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> >

> > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> >

> > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to

find someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring

the three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please

> >

> > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> >

>

> Hi ,

>

> Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you have found yourself in such a

horrible situation.

>

> I am separated from my wife and our daughter spends equal time between the two

of us. We will all understand how devastated you feel, OCD is so isolating for

everyone involved. My daughter often says she needs a hug and when I move near

her says she can't because I am contaminated, so I have some insight into how

you are feeling.

>

> I'm sorry I can't offer any help, I know there are people on here that will be

more qualified to do that, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

>

> Big hugs

>

> Mike.

>

> London U.K

>

>

[Guest guest]

Your son needs ERP therapy where he is systematically

exposed to your presence to the point he does not

think you are contiminated anymore. It is so sad

that you where not directed to this treatment before

the situation got so out of hand.

At this point, if you can find a OCD specialist that

can advocate for your son's health care needs that

are not being met by your ex-wife. A case can

be made perhaps that she is negleget and making him

sicker. Any specialist in OCD is going to see that

taking him away from you is not a treatment plan

for OCD. This strategy though may not bring you

and your wife back together.

Another stratgey would be to find an expert and

ask your ex-wife to go with to discuss the matter

of your son's health. If a therapist can talk

to her and gain her cooperation it may be

less of an adversary relationship between

the two of you.

Hopefully if you son gets help there may be

a way to repair your relationship with your

ex-wife too.

Best of luck,

Pam

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please.

>

> I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

>

> My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

>

> 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

>

> Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

>

> I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that OCD

had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I. (Up

to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

>

> Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

>

> From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and have

been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

>

> My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

>

> I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my wife

and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please

>

> " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

>

[Guest guest]

I have a son with ocd but not to that bad. I feel so bad for u and ur family. I

hope u get the help u need and ur wife sees how much u care about her. Maybe try

and find someone that can help and let her know what u find and woo her back

through that. Send her som flowers or something while u are serching for help.

Good Luck May God Help u !

 

________________________________

To:

Sent: Wed, July 7, 2010 1:17:36 PM

Subject: My son's OCD made him think I was contaminated - now

my wife & son have left me

 

Can anybody advise or help me please.

I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in one

room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling that I

was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings of

lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how we

might cope with the situation - but without success.

I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that OCD

had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I. (Up

to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and have

been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to know

how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also how

my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my wife

and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

Can anybody advise or help me please

" " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

[Guest guest]

Thank you for your kind thoughts.

Where in the world are you please?

>

> I have a son with ocd but not to that bad. I feel so bad for u and ur family.

I

> hope u get the help u need and ur wife sees how much u care about her. Maybe

try

> and find someone that can help and let her know what u find and woo her back

> through that. Send her som flowers or something while u are serching for

help.

> Good Luck May God Help u !

>  

>

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Wed, July 7, 2010 1:17:36 PM

> Subject: My son's OCD made him think I was contaminated -

now

> my wife & son have left me

>

>  

> Can anybody advise or help me please.

>

> I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

> where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

>

>

> My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

> contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

>

> 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

> Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

> touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

> the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had

touched

> or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

> Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE

exams

> for the present.

>

> Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one

> room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling that

I

> was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings of

> lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how we

> might cope with the situation - but without success.

>

> I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that OCD

> had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up

> to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

>

> Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

> mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying

to

> cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

> the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

> me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

>

> From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and have

> been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

>

> My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know

> how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how

> my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

>

> I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my wife

> and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

> someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

> three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please

>

> " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you for your kind thoughts Mike

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> >

> > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

> >

> > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> >

> > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

> >

> > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

> >

> > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> >

> > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> >

> > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> >

> > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> >

> > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to

find someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring

the three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please

> >

> > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> >

>

>

> Hi ,

>

> Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you have found yourself in such a

horrible situation.

>

> I am separated from my wife and our daughter spends equal time between the two

of us. We will all understand how devastated you feel, OCD is so isolating for

everyone involved. My daughter often says she needs a hug and when I move near

her says she can't because I am contaminated, so I have some insight into how

you are feeling.

>

> I'm sorry I can't offer any help, I know there are people on here that will be

more qualified to do that, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

>

> Big hugs

>

> Mike.

>

> London U.K

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you for your helpful thoughts Pam.

Where in the world are you please?

I'd like to talk to you more please.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> >

> > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

> >

> > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> >

> > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

> >

> > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

> >

> > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> >

> > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> >

> > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> >

> > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> >

> > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to

find someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring

the three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please

> >

> > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you for sharing you experience.

I'd like to talk to you more please

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> >

> > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

> >

> > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> >

> > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

> >

> > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

> >

> > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> >

> > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> >

> > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> >

> > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> >

> > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to

find someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring

the three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please

> >

> > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Pam

Thank you for your helpful thoughts .

Where in the world are you please?

I'd like to talk to you more please

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> >

> > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

> >

> > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> >

> > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

> >

> > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

> >

> > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> >

> > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> >

> > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> >

> > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> >

> > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to

find someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring

the three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please

> >

> > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi , most of the group members here are from the US. Other locations

outside US (Canada, UK, New Zealand, Australia, Greece...) but primarily US.

I'm so sorry that OCD with your son led to your marriage separation. Sounds

like the therapist you mentioned wasn't experienced in treating OCD.

Pam's right about the therapy for your son, there should be a plan for exposure

for him to work on his contamination fears about you.

You're certainly not the first " contaminated parent " and often a single family

member (siblings too) are contaminated.

Is your wife seeking therapy for your son? Sounded like they have broken off

contact with you. I hope that, as time goes by, you two can talk about the help

he needs and can eventually work things out. I imagine she (as you did too) may

have felt overwhelmed with the demands of your son (his OCD) and just the

" mothering " that we moms do (I'm a single mom, divorced) when our children are

ill...anyway, as I said, sounds like your family didn't have a good therapist to

guide you, your wife, and son on how to handle his OCD, to treat it.

Got to run, but wanted to say " hi " and so sorry for your situation. OCD causes

turmoil in families (we all know). My other 2 sons felt " ignored " when my OCD

son (now 21) was going thru a bad time, most of my attention went to him.

(North Carolina)

>

> Pam

>

> Thank you for your helpful thoughts .

>

> Where in the world are you please?

>

> I'd like to talk to you more please

>

>

[Guest guest]

I am in the US/east coast. You can email me on my yahoo

account if you like.

Pam

> > >

> > > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> > >

> > > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with

contamination where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be

near them.

> > >

> > > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I

was contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> > >

> > > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

> > >

> > > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me

in one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

> > >

> > > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> > >

> > > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share

of mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying

to cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> > >

> > > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> > >

> > > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> > >

> > > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to

find someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring

the three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> > >

> > > Can anybody advise or help me please

> > >

> > > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I to am sorry to hear of what you are going through! I can say that I am going

through the same thing you are talking about.

We have a son who is 11.5 years old and about 3 months ago, he started having a

contamination problem. It is huge right now, he can't go into his room because

everything in there is contaminated. If I go in there then I spread the

contamination.

For the last three months our son has been sleeping on the living room floor in

a tiny area with a blanket, because everything else is contaminated. Our son

would constantly wash his hands all the way up to his elbows all the time,until

his hands where raw and bleeding, because of the contamination.

At one point he said that his Dad was contaminated! It is really hard! What we

have done is we carry hand sanitizer & wipes with us at all times. I mean this

is a crazy thing! There is always something that is contaminated.

The childrens seat in the carts are the grocery store, the bathroom drawer, the

couches, the dog, some of the silverware that we use on a daily bases. What we

have also done is sometimes we ware gloves and long sleeves just so we can hug!

I know that what you are going through is hard, what your son is going through

is also hard! For what ever reason they have a hard time controlling this. We

have recently put our son on Flouoxetine (Prozac) 10 mg. It hasn't made the

contamination go away, but it has calmed our son down quite a bit! I am not

saying that Prozac is right for everyone, but it is very helpful for us!

It just takes time! For my husband it is very difficult for him to understand,

because life wasn't like this when we where young or if it was nobody knew about

it. It has taken him a lot of time and arguements to understand. I went online

and printed off so many articles about our son's condition. I made him read them

over and over until he understood what I was going through.

I seriously thought that we to where headed for divorice. I really do understand

you pain! Just try and understand it isn't you, it's your son. He has these

voices in his head telling him these things. It is hurtful for you I know, if

you try and understand all this and try and find ways to help him to get use to

you again.

Some of the people here have helped me so much, just in the short time I have

been here. They have a lot of great advice, I am hoping that you will find what

you are looking for here.

Just know that you aren't alone! A lot of us are going through the same thing,

you just have to be more creative in finding ways to help you in

this situation.

Good luck I know you to will find a way!

________________________________

To:

Sent: Wed, July 7, 2010 3:41:30 PM

Subject: Re: My son's OCD made him think I was contaminated -

now my wife & son have left me

 

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please.

>

> I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

>where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

>

>

> My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

>contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

>

> 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

>Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

>touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

>the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had

touched

>or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

>Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

>for the present.

>

> Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one

>room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling that

I

>was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings of

>lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how we

>might cope with the situation - but without success.

>

> I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that OCD

>had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up

>to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

>

> Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

>mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying

to

>cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

>the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

>me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

>

> From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and have

>been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

>

> My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know

>how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also how

>my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

>

> I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my wife

>and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

>someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

>three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please

>

> " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

>

Hi ,

Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you have found yourself in such a

horrible situation.

I am separated from my wife and our daughter spends equal time between the two

of us. We will all understand how devastated you feel, OCD is so isolating for

everyone involved. My daughter often says she needs a hug and when I move near

her says she can't because I am contaminated, so I have some insight into how

you are feeling.

I'm sorry I can't offer any help, I know there are people on here that will be

more qualified to do that, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

Big hugs

Mike.

London U.K

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I can relate a little bit in that my 7 year old daughter thought I was

contaminated at certain times and would not let me touch her or anything of

hers, prepare her food, etc. However, she would somehow get past it over time.

Sometimes after a day. Sometimes after a few days. But it never lasted as long

as your sons. It was heart breaking and gut wrenching for me for just that short

time, so I can't imagine how hard it is on you.

Sometimes she would think my husband was contaminated as well. So at least he

understood.

The worst was when we were both contaminated at the same time and could not

provide any comfort to her at all. We felt so helpless and useless. But I can't

imagine if it were just me. I am so sorry for what must be a indescribably

isolating experience for you.

We had my daughter in therapy and practice exposure/response prevention daily.

We also came very close to medicating my daughter with either Celexa or Zoloft

(right around the time we were both contaminated). However, based on a very

small but nagging hunch, we explored the PANDAS route and determined that she

does indeed have PANDAS. She has been on prophlactic antibiotics for three

months now and is about 90% better.

I have not had a chance to read through the responses to your posts, so I

apologize if I am asking questions that have already been answered.

Without reading them, I am sure people have mentioned CBT/ERP and have probably

given you some suggested reading.

They have probably also mentioned medication. Maybe someone has mentioned

PANDAS/PITAND as well. But if they haven't, it may be something you want to

explore to determine whether an auto-immune issue is causing some of this to

happen. Even though your son is a teenager, it does not mean that PANDAS/PITAND

is out of the question.

In the mean time, I hope you are getting some help and support for

yourself...perhaps some therapy. I've found huge solace in this group and a

PANDAS support group on Latitudes.org. But that personal, one-on-one or small

group support is invaluable as well.

My heart goes out to you.

Kara

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please.

>

> I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

>

> My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

>

> 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

>

> Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

>

> I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that OCD

had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I. (Up

to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

>

> Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying to

cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

>

> From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and have

been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

>

> My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

>

> I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my wife

and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

>

> Can anybody advise or help me please

>

> " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks . Where in the world are you?

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> >

> > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

> >where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

> >

> >

> > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

> >contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> >

> > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

> >Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing

after

> >touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD

took

> >the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had

touched

> >or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see

recommended

> >Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE

exams

> >for the present.

> >

> > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

one

> >room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I

> >was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings of

> >lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we

> >might cope with the situation - but without success.

> >

> > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD

> >had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up

> >to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> >

> > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

> >mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying

to

> >cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

> >the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has

left

> >me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> >

> > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have

> >been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> >

> > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know

> >how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how

> >my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> >

> > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife

> >and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

> >someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

> >three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please

> >

> > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> >

>

> Hi ,

>

> Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you have found yourself in such a

> horrible situation.

>

>

> I am separated from my wife and our daughter spends equal time between the two

> of us. We will all understand how devastated you feel, OCD is so isolating for

> everyone involved. My daughter often says she needs a hug and when I move near

> her says she can't because I am contaminated, so I have some insight into how

> you are feeling.

>

> I'm sorry I can't offer any help, I know there are people on here that will be

> more qualified to do that, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

>

> Big hugs

>

> Mike.

>

> London U.K

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

________________________________

To:

Sent: Fri, July 9, 2010 1:58:16 AM

Subject: Re: My son's OCD made him think I was contaminated -

now my wife & son have left me

 

Thanks . Where in the world are you?

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> >

> > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with contamination

> >where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be near them.

> >

> >

> > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I was

> >contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> >

> > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

> >Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing

after

>

> >touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD

took

>

> >the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had

>touched

>

> >or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see

recommended

>

> >Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE

>exams

>

> >for the present.

> >

> > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me in

>one

>

> >room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that

>I

>

> >was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings of

> >lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we

>

> >might cope with the situation - but without success.

> >

> > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

>OCD

>

> >had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

>(Up

>

> >to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> >

> > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share of

> >mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying

>to

>

> >cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

> >the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has

left

>

> >me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> >

> > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

>have

>

> >been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> >

> > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

>know

>

> >how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

>how

>

> >my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> >

> > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife

>

> >and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to find

> >someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring the

> >three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> >

> > Can anybody advise or help me please

> >

> > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> >

>

> Hi ,

>

> Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you have found yourself in such a

> horrible situation.

>

>

> I am separated from my wife and our daughter spends equal time between the two

> of us. We will all understand how devastated you feel, OCD is so isolating for

> everyone involved. My daughter often says she needs a hug and when I move near

> her says she can't because I am contaminated, so I have some insight into how

> you are feeling.

>

> I'm sorry I can't offer any help, I know there are people on here that will be

> more qualified to do that, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

>

> Big hugs

>

> Mike.

>

> London U.K

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I am sorry for what has happened.

I, too, am " the contaminated " one. I am dealing with it, though the tears and

frustration are, at times, overwhelming.

Anything I touch becomes contaminated. Clothes have to be washed. There is no

hugging or touching - only just before a shower.

But, in my son's case, he is so much better than he was, that am living with it

because I know how much worse it was.

I hope you find the help you and your family needs,

Phyllis

> > >

> > > Can anybody advise or help me please.

> > >

> > > I am looking to hear from other parents whose have dealt with

contamination where their child could not touch anything they had touched or be

near them.

> > >

> > > My son's OCD has made my wife and son leave me. His OCD made him think I

was contaminated so he became anxious whenever he was near me.

> > >

> > > 2 years ago my 15 year old son was diagnosed as suffering from Obsessive

Compulsive Disorder after we noticed he was making his hands raw washing after

touching door handles in our home . Tragically we discovered that his OCD took

the form of a feeling of deep anxiety whenever he touched anything I had touched

or was even near me. The child psychiatrist we took our son to see recommended

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy but advised our son to concentate on his GCSE exams

for the present.

> > >

> > > Gradually my teacher wife and son spent more and more time apart from me

in one room with myself in another because of my son's OCD. This left me feeling

that I was a leper in my own house. I tried to talk to my wife about my feelings

of lack of affection from both of them, and my isolation and exclusion and how

we might cope with the situation - but without success.

> > >

> > > I then gradually sank into deepening depression, about the cruel gulf that

OCD had created between my dearly loved son and myself and my lovely wife and I.

(Up to 2 years ago I had been a very happy outgoing person.)

> > >

> > > Eventually, in a marriage which had already had more than its fair share

of mostly undeserved stress, and now with the added daily heavy burden of trying

to cope with the tension that OCD had brought into the family home, my wife took

the drastic decision to take my son away and file for divorce - which has left

me alone, utterly distraught and helpless.

> > >

> > > From the day they left 6 months ago, I have been severely traumatised and

have been left, pondering the cruel blow OCD had dealt.

> > >

> > > My little family of just the three of us was my life and I am concerned to

know how my high-achieving son has fared with his GCSE exams and his music. Also

how my wife is getting on in her new teaching job.

> > >

> > > I have no other family here and constantly pray to be reconciled with my

wife and my son and for us to be reunited as a family. I have tried daily to

find someone who might have the time and be concerned enough, to help to bring

the three of us together again - but so far all too no avail.

> > >

> > > Can anybody advise or help me please

> > >

> > > " " - South Yorkshire, England, UK

> > >

> >

> > Hi ,

> >

> > Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you have found yourself in such a

horrible situation.

> >

> > I am separated from my wife and our daughter spends equal time between the

two of us. We will all understand how devastated you feel, OCD is so isolating

for everyone involved. My daughter often says she needs a hug and when I move

near her says she can't because I am contaminated, so I have some insight into

how you are feeling.

> >

> > I'm sorry I can't offer any help, I know there are people on here that will

be more qualified to do that, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

> >

> > Big hugs

> >

> > Mike.

> >

> > London U.K

> >

> >

>

>

>

>