Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. That includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I both know very well DO exist. *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You are real and important and intelligent and have a lot to offer this world,to those who are willing to listen. Kassiane --- sondra wrote: > kassi who to say I to not be of one who exists? that > is of scary to > me. As in life have been struggling with this > concept for much long > time and so much want of to feel grounded and real. > maybe she never > to met of me is why she thinks I to not be of one > who exists. > > today in my therapy time I to showed of my therapist > some of my work > of cutting out pictures from magazines and words and > such too from > tehm and creating a collage of my perspectives and > thinking. he > shares they are of quite profound and communicate so > much. I to found > this play to be of most effective in discovering > self and images of > how I to see of the world and what my thinking is to > be within me > that might not get expressed in verbal fashions. I > to be of actually > creating a gift for one of teh counselors there that > is of very > gentle and caring to me and often does the one to > one and or group > time if Dr. Amigo is of ill and so have grown to > feel much safe with > this other person too. O > > a few of the pages share my fear of how I to not > feel connected, > whole, or as if I to exist in life. I to just not > have a very good > sense of self yet in ways others would be to expect > but do have a > strong sende of inner self in fragmented ways. such > as can relate and > or understand concepts and things about self as a > individual person > but cant relate to others. It is like being > pervasively aware of many > things trapped within me and relating to those > concepts at high > levels but at the same cant relate well to people as > individuals and > or in personal related fashions. > > the other odd is even if feeling intense pains > within me and such , > and can be of verbal often cant seem to find the > ways to communicate > it and find self aware but not aware and so the > pains gets reflected > as behavior of negative outcomes and then when one > shares Sondra are > you not feeling well? My brain my then and only then > really relate > and understand my body is of hurting? does this to > make of sense/ it > is of a awareness of this effect in me or barrier, > but yet not able > to be functional in being able to transfer and or > utilize for my own > good and outcomes. > Sondra > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. That includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I both know very well DO exist. *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You are real and important and intelligent and have a lot to offer this world,to those who are willing to listen. Kassiane --- sondra wrote: > kassi who to say I to not be of one who exists? that > is of scary to > me. As in life have been struggling with this > concept for much long > time and so much want of to feel grounded and real. > maybe she never > to met of me is why she thinks I to not be of one > who exists. > > today in my therapy time I to showed of my therapist > some of my work > of cutting out pictures from magazines and words and > such too from > tehm and creating a collage of my perspectives and > thinking. he > shares they are of quite profound and communicate so > much. I to found > this play to be of most effective in discovering > self and images of > how I to see of the world and what my thinking is to > be within me > that might not get expressed in verbal fashions. I > to be of actually > creating a gift for one of teh counselors there that > is of very > gentle and caring to me and often does the one to > one and or group > time if Dr. Amigo is of ill and so have grown to > feel much safe with > this other person too. O > > a few of the pages share my fear of how I to not > feel connected, > whole, or as if I to exist in life. I to just not > have a very good > sense of self yet in ways others would be to expect > but do have a > strong sende of inner self in fragmented ways. such > as can relate and > or understand concepts and things about self as a > individual person > but cant relate to others. It is like being > pervasively aware of many > things trapped within me and relating to those > concepts at high > levels but at the same cant relate well to people as > individuals and > or in personal related fashions. > > the other odd is even if feeling intense pains > within me and such , > and can be of verbal often cant seem to find the > ways to communicate > it and find self aware but not aware and so the > pains gets reflected > as behavior of negative outcomes and then when one > shares Sondra are > you not feeling well? My brain my then and only then > really relate > and understand my body is of hurting? does this to > make of sense/ it > is of a awareness of this effect in me or barrier, > but yet not able > to be functional in being able to transfer and or > utilize for my own > good and outcomes. > Sondra > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 WHAT? McCarthy said that??? What is wrong with her??? How insensitive can she be? I also heard somewhere that she said she " cured " her son's Autism...is this true as well??? I was under the impression that it wasn't curable..only treatable through therapy basically, which is what I do with my daughter...I heard she helped her son through diet, but if he went off the diet wouldn't his so called healed Autism come back??? You do exist and you help me alot to understand what my daughter is going through...you are my link to her...you help to say what she cannot say to me, because you have experienced it and grown through it...thank you soooo much... G. Kassi wrote: McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. That includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I both know very well DO exist. *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You are real and important and intelligent and have a lot to offer this world,to those who are willing to listen. Kassiane --- sondra wrote: > kassi who to say I to not be of one who exists? that > is of scary to > me. As in life have been struggling with this > concept for much long > time and so much want of to feel grounded and real. > maybe she never > to met of me is why she thinks I to not be of one > who exists. > > today in my therapy time I to showed of my therapist > some of my work > of cutting out pictures from magazines and words and > such too from > tehm and creating a collage of my perspectives and > thinking. he > shares they are of quite profound and communicate so > much. I to found > this play to be of most effective in discovering > self and images of > how I to see of the world and what my thinking is to > be within me > that might not get expressed in verbal fashions. I > to be of actually > creating a gift for one of teh counselors there that > is of very > gentle and caring to me and often does the one to > one and or group > time if Dr. Amigo is of ill and so have grown to > feel much safe with > this other person too. O > > a few of the pages share my fear of how I to not > feel connected, > whole, or as if I to exist in life. I to just not > have a very good > sense of self yet in ways others would be to expect > but do have a > strong sende of inner self in fragmented ways. such > as can relate and > or understand concepts and things about self as a > individual person > but cant relate to others. It is like being > pervasively aware of many > things trapped within me and relating to those > concepts at high > levels but at the same cant relate well to people as > individuals and > or in personal related fashions. > > the other odd is even if feeling intense pains > within me and such , > and can be of verbal often cant seem to find the > ways to communicate > it and find self aware but not aware and so the > pains gets reflected > as behavior of negative outcomes and then when one > shares Sondra are > you not feeling well? My brain my then and only then > really relate > and understand my body is of hurting? does this to > make of sense/ it > is of a awareness of this effect in me or barrier, > but yet not able > to be functional in being able to transfer and or > utilize for my own > good and outcomes. > Sondra > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 WHAT? McCarthy said that??? What is wrong with her??? How insensitive can she be? I also heard somewhere that she said she " cured " her son's Autism...is this true as well??? I was under the impression that it wasn't curable..only treatable through therapy basically, which is what I do with my daughter...I heard she helped her son through diet, but if he went off the diet wouldn't his so called healed Autism come back??? You do exist and you help me alot to understand what my daughter is going through...you are my link to her...you help to say what she cannot say to me, because you have experienced it and grown through it...thank you soooo much... G. Kassi wrote: McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. That includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I both know very well DO exist. *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You are real and important and intelligent and have a lot to offer this world,to those who are willing to listen. Kassiane --- sondra wrote: > kassi who to say I to not be of one who exists? that > is of scary to > me. As in life have been struggling with this > concept for much long > time and so much want of to feel grounded and real. > maybe she never > to met of me is why she thinks I to not be of one > who exists. > > today in my therapy time I to showed of my therapist > some of my work > of cutting out pictures from magazines and words and > such too from > tehm and creating a collage of my perspectives and > thinking. he > shares they are of quite profound and communicate so > much. I to found > this play to be of most effective in discovering > self and images of > how I to see of the world and what my thinking is to > be within me > that might not get expressed in verbal fashions. I > to be of actually > creating a gift for one of teh counselors there that > is of very > gentle and caring to me and often does the one to > one and or group > time if Dr. Amigo is of ill and so have grown to > feel much safe with > this other person too. O > > a few of the pages share my fear of how I to not > feel connected, > whole, or as if I to exist in life. I to just not > have a very good > sense of self yet in ways others would be to expect > but do have a > strong sende of inner self in fragmented ways. such > as can relate and > or understand concepts and things about self as a > individual person > but cant relate to others. It is like being > pervasively aware of many > things trapped within me and relating to those > concepts at high > levels but at the same cant relate well to people as > individuals and > or in personal related fashions. > > the other odd is even if feeling intense pains > within me and such , > and can be of verbal often cant seem to find the > ways to communicate > it and find self aware but not aware and so the > pains gets reflected > as behavior of negative outcomes and then when one > shares Sondra are > you not feeling well? My brain my then and only then > really relate > and understand my body is of hurting? does this to > make of sense/ it > is of a awareness of this effect in me or barrier, > but yet not able > to be functional in being able to transfer and or > utilize for my own > good and outcomes. > Sondra > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 There are a number of kids who have lost their diagnosis. There are some who feel autism isn't a disease and therefore there is nothing to cure. Then there are some who feel the symptoms are a disorder/disease and when the symptoms, like diarrhea, food allergies, etc, are healed then autism is " cured " though the person may still behave as if the person has autism, or the person may lose the symptoms through healing the body. Then there are those who feel until the child behaves " normal " that's the only cure. So you see, this terminology can mean a lot to a lot of people. I fall under the camp of healing my daughter's body; there is no such thing as " normal. " Debi > > > WHAT? McCarthy said that??? What is wrong with her??? How insensitive can she be? I also heard somewhere that she said she " cured " her son's Autism...is this true as well??? I was under the impression that it wasn't curable..only treatable through therapy basically, which is what I do with my daughter...I heard she helped her son through diet, but if he went off the diet wouldn't his so called healed Autism come back??? > > You do exist and you help me alot to understand what my daughter is going through...you are my link to her...you help to say what she cannot say to me, because you have experienced it and grown through it...thank you soooo much... > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 There are a number of kids who have lost their diagnosis. There are some who feel autism isn't a disease and therefore there is nothing to cure. Then there are some who feel the symptoms are a disorder/disease and when the symptoms, like diarrhea, food allergies, etc, are healed then autism is " cured " though the person may still behave as if the person has autism, or the person may lose the symptoms through healing the body. Then there are those who feel until the child behaves " normal " that's the only cure. So you see, this terminology can mean a lot to a lot of people. I fall under the camp of healing my daughter's body; there is no such thing as " normal. " Debi > > > WHAT? McCarthy said that??? What is wrong with her??? How insensitive can she be? I also heard somewhere that she said she " cured " her son's Autism...is this true as well??? I was under the impression that it wasn't curable..only treatable through therapy basically, which is what I do with my daughter...I heard she helped her son through diet, but if he went off the diet wouldn't his so called healed Autism come back??? > > You do exist and you help me alot to understand what my daughter is going through...you are my link to her...you help to say what she cannot say to me, because you have experienced it and grown through it...thank you soooo much... > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 She (McCarthy) met Bernie Rimland's son and several other adults on the spectrum at a recent DAN! conference--parents wrote about it on some of the yahoo groups. Kassi, I suspect someone may have taken 's words out of context. Penny > > McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. That > includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I both > know very well DO exist. > > *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You are > real and important and intelligent and have a lot to > offer this world,to those who are willing to listen. > > Kassiane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 She (McCarthy) met Bernie Rimland's son and several other adults on the spectrum at a recent DAN! conference--parents wrote about it on some of the yahoo groups. Kassi, I suspect someone may have taken 's words out of context. Penny > > McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. That > includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I both > know very well DO exist. > > *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You are > real and important and intelligent and have a lot to > offer this world,to those who are willing to listen. > > Kassiane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 *shakes head* I read the interview. She said " There are no adults, it's all now " when asked about the adults. I know the first three adults she met (and the first was not Bernie's son, it was my friend ). It's like if she doesn't have personal experience with something it doesn't exist...I DID look for the quote because it was an " oh my heavens you have GOT to be kidding " kind of thing, in light of her meeting my 3 friends AND the other autistics at DAN! plus the others she's run into. It still baffles me that intelligent people are taking someone who called herself an Indigo Child and " enjoys farting " seriously on scientific matters anyway. She knows what it is to be Evan's mother and that's about where her expertise ends (and the implications that if you don't spend umpteen zillion dollars trying everything for your kid it's your fault if your kid has XYZ problem bother me too...but not as much as they bother parents, I'd imagine...) Kassiane who exists --- penelope_fam wrote: > > She (McCarthy) met Bernie Rimland's son and several > other adults on the > spectrum at a recent DAN! conference--parents wrote > about it on some of > the yahoo groups. Kassi, I suspect someone may > have taken 's > words out of context. > > Penny > > > > > > > McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. > That > > includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I > both > > know very well DO exist. > > > > *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You > are > > real and important and intelligent and have a lot > to > > offer this world,to those who are willing to > listen. > > > > Kassiane > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Get easy, one-click access to your favorites. Make Yahoo! your homepage. http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 *shakes head* I read the interview. She said " There are no adults, it's all now " when asked about the adults. I know the first three adults she met (and the first was not Bernie's son, it was my friend ). It's like if she doesn't have personal experience with something it doesn't exist...I DID look for the quote because it was an " oh my heavens you have GOT to be kidding " kind of thing, in light of her meeting my 3 friends AND the other autistics at DAN! plus the others she's run into. It still baffles me that intelligent people are taking someone who called herself an Indigo Child and " enjoys farting " seriously on scientific matters anyway. She knows what it is to be Evan's mother and that's about where her expertise ends (and the implications that if you don't spend umpteen zillion dollars trying everything for your kid it's your fault if your kid has XYZ problem bother me too...but not as much as they bother parents, I'd imagine...) Kassiane who exists --- penelope_fam wrote: > > She (McCarthy) met Bernie Rimland's son and several > other adults on the > spectrum at a recent DAN! conference--parents wrote > about it on some of > the yahoo groups. Kassi, I suspect someone may > have taken 's > words out of context. > > Penny > > > > > > > McCarthy says adult autistics don't exist. > That > > includes you, me, a lot of people who you and I > both > > know very well DO exist. > > > > *I* know you are real, for what that matters. You > are > > real and important and intelligent and have a lot > to > > offer this world,to those who are willing to > listen. > > > > Kassiane > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Get easy, one-click access to your favorites. Make Yahoo! your homepage. http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 I too feel there is of not a normal state of being that is of a set true for all, but do think that each of us is of normal for our own beings. the essence of Sondra defines her normal and the essences of Kassi defines hers. Autism does mold to a varying degree our reactions, or responses, learning and such but it does not mean we lack a sense of normal, we just ahve a different normal than maybe , or carol, or debi,,,,, but even among them they have a different normal among that group ... I to think there is not a way to define normal it might be of easier to define individualism. I to lack why this person to thinks there is not adults with autism, do she think we all die before to reach of adult life? or that her son was of the first to have of it. I to also agree to the various terms used by some in regard to the term of being cured? some see it only as a biomedical mess and thus once that is of corrected feel their child is of cured, or if they gain from a once more clasical auitsm to a more HFA and or aspergers like kid they then are cured instead of seeing the child is just making progress in areas of daily living, langauge, socail and play. Anyways that is of my thinkings. Sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 I too feel there is of not a normal state of being that is of a set true for all, but do think that each of us is of normal for our own beings. the essence of Sondra defines her normal and the essences of Kassi defines hers. Autism does mold to a varying degree our reactions, or responses, learning and such but it does not mean we lack a sense of normal, we just ahve a different normal than maybe , or carol, or debi,,,,, but even among them they have a different normal among that group ... I to think there is not a way to define normal it might be of easier to define individualism. I to lack why this person to thinks there is not adults with autism, do she think we all die before to reach of adult life? or that her son was of the first to have of it. I to also agree to the various terms used by some in regard to the term of being cured? some see it only as a biomedical mess and thus once that is of corrected feel their child is of cured, or if they gain from a once more clasical auitsm to a more HFA and or aspergers like kid they then are cured instead of seeing the child is just making progress in areas of daily living, langauge, socail and play. Anyways that is of my thinkings. Sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 To all of you: I want to give a sincere thank you as you also give me some insight into my daughter's mind, feelings, frustrations, etc. The puzzle piece is such a perfect symbol for autism because there are sooooo many pieces, levels, etc. and it is such a vast mystery. Those of you who post that currently EXIST (Quite well I might add) with autism (or any other disorder), I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You are so much more intelligent than than you may realize or give yourselves credit for. I often think of how difficult this journey is for ME, forgetting that the journey is three times as long and difficult for my dd Hannah. Bless all of you. > > I too feel there is of not a normal state of being that is of a set > true for all, but do think that each of us is of normal for our own > beings. the essence of Sondra defines her normal and the essences of > Kassi defines hers. > > Autism does mold to a varying degree our reactions, or responses, > learning and such but it does not mean we lack a sense of normal, we > just ahve a different normal than maybe , or carol, or > debi,,,,, but even among them they have a different normal among that > group ... I to think there is not a way to define normal it might be > of easier to define individualism. > > I to lack why this person to thinks there is not adults with autism, > do she think we all die before to reach of adult life? or that her > son was of the first to have of it. > > I to also agree to the various terms used by some in regard to the > term of being cured? some see it only as a biomedical mess and thus > once that is of corrected feel their child is of cured, or if they > gain from a once more clasical auitsm to a more HFA and or aspergers > like kid they then are cured instead of seeing the child is just > making progress in areas of daily living, langauge, socail and play. > > Anyways that is of my thinkings. > Sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 To all of you: I want to give a sincere thank you as you also give me some insight into my daughter's mind, feelings, frustrations, etc. The puzzle piece is such a perfect symbol for autism because there are sooooo many pieces, levels, etc. and it is such a vast mystery. Those of you who post that currently EXIST (Quite well I might add) with autism (or any other disorder), I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You are so much more intelligent than than you may realize or give yourselves credit for. I often think of how difficult this journey is for ME, forgetting that the journey is three times as long and difficult for my dd Hannah. Bless all of you. > > I too feel there is of not a normal state of being that is of a set > true for all, but do think that each of us is of normal for our own > beings. the essence of Sondra defines her normal and the essences of > Kassi defines hers. > > Autism does mold to a varying degree our reactions, or responses, > learning and such but it does not mean we lack a sense of normal, we > just ahve a different normal than maybe , or carol, or > debi,,,,, but even among them they have a different normal among that > group ... I to think there is not a way to define normal it might be > of easier to define individualism. > > I to lack why this person to thinks there is not adults with autism, > do she think we all die before to reach of adult life? or that her > son was of the first to have of it. > > I to also agree to the various terms used by some in regard to the > term of being cured? some see it only as a biomedical mess and thus > once that is of corrected feel their child is of cured, or if they > gain from a once more clasical auitsm to a more HFA and or aspergers > like kid they then are cured instead of seeing the child is just > making progress in areas of daily living, langauge, socail and play. > > Anyways that is of my thinkings. > Sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 > There are a number of kids who have lost their diagnosis. There are > some who feel autism isn't a disease and therefore there is nothing to > cure. Then there are some who feel the symptoms are a disorder/disease > and when the symptoms, like diarrhea, food allergies, etc, are healed > then autism is " cured " though the person may still behave as if the > person has autism, or the person may lose the symptoms through healing > the body. Then there are those who feel until the child behaves > " normal " that's the only cure. So you see, this terminology can mean a > lot to a lot of people. I fall under the camp of healing my daughter's > body; there is no such thing as " normal. " > > Debi > > It's really interesting about this thread on what McCarthy has > said. It just shows to me that one's opinions can be taken in so many > different ways. When I read her book, what I got out of it was...this mom > went heart & soul into " curing " her child, and in her case he did remarkably > well, " cured " in her opinion. But like what Debi said, the word " cure " is > taken in so many different ways, you really have to dig deeper to see what > it means to the person who said/thinks it. I'd like to take the good of > what is trying to say, to get awareness out there for the public but > also for parents who don't get hooked up with other proactive parents & do > nothing except rely on the schools (or whatever) & leave it at that, > " accept " that their child has autism & that there is nothing they can do > about it. I have met many parents who do nothing for their kids except to " accept it " & I have also met many others who do so much to try to heal their child. I am always amazed at the number of parents who think " it's too hard to do " , or I don't want to belong to a support group b/c all they do is complain, etc. Since I don't know in what context said that there are no adults with autism, I don't know that she really meant that the adults didn't exist. How could they NOT exist??? Because not all treatments recover everyone on the spectrum, not everyone gets " cured " , " recovered " or any other terminology. Besides, is only one person & it may be her opinion, but we can discard it as just that, IF that is what she really meant. I don't know her, but it seems she may say things " off the cuff " & did she really mean that adults on the spectrum didn't exist. It doesn't make sense since she has met some adults on the spectrum, does it? Sondra, Kassi, can you guys " let it go " & not let it hurt your feeling or make you angry. As others have said, you guys on the spectrum give me so much insight into my child's possible thoughts or explain what might be going on from an " autistic's " perspective. (I'm using autistics, like diabetics & hope I don't offend, not my intention). Does 's words carry so much weight, more than ours, who love you guys so much? Aren't we the ones that matter more b/c we care? I think that sometimes when you're in the public eye, things get misconstrued b/c you don't have the time to really get to know everyone. Even not in the public eye, when you have casual conversations, it gets taken out of context & is not what you really mean. I do that a fair bit, I think, b/c I can't get all my words out appropriately, so who knows what other people thing about me & what I've SAID, not what I MEANT. Love & peace to everyone (corny....) > -- > Marie A. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 > There are a number of kids who have lost their diagnosis. There are > some who feel autism isn't a disease and therefore there is nothing to > cure. Then there are some who feel the symptoms are a disorder/disease > and when the symptoms, like diarrhea, food allergies, etc, are healed > then autism is " cured " though the person may still behave as if the > person has autism, or the person may lose the symptoms through healing > the body. Then there are those who feel until the child behaves > " normal " that's the only cure. So you see, this terminology can mean a > lot to a lot of people. I fall under the camp of healing my daughter's > body; there is no such thing as " normal. " > > Debi > > It's really interesting about this thread on what McCarthy has > said. It just shows to me that one's opinions can be taken in so many > different ways. When I read her book, what I got out of it was...this mom > went heart & soul into " curing " her child, and in her case he did remarkably > well, " cured " in her opinion. But like what Debi said, the word " cure " is > taken in so many different ways, you really have to dig deeper to see what > it means to the person who said/thinks it. I'd like to take the good of > what is trying to say, to get awareness out there for the public but > also for parents who don't get hooked up with other proactive parents & do > nothing except rely on the schools (or whatever) & leave it at that, > " accept " that their child has autism & that there is nothing they can do > about it. I have met many parents who do nothing for their kids except to " accept it " & I have also met many others who do so much to try to heal their child. I am always amazed at the number of parents who think " it's too hard to do " , or I don't want to belong to a support group b/c all they do is complain, etc. Since I don't know in what context said that there are no adults with autism, I don't know that she really meant that the adults didn't exist. How could they NOT exist??? Because not all treatments recover everyone on the spectrum, not everyone gets " cured " , " recovered " or any other terminology. Besides, is only one person & it may be her opinion, but we can discard it as just that, IF that is what she really meant. I don't know her, but it seems she may say things " off the cuff " & did she really mean that adults on the spectrum didn't exist. It doesn't make sense since she has met some adults on the spectrum, does it? Sondra, Kassi, can you guys " let it go " & not let it hurt your feeling or make you angry. As others have said, you guys on the spectrum give me so much insight into my child's possible thoughts or explain what might be going on from an " autistic's " perspective. (I'm using autistics, like diabetics & hope I don't offend, not my intention). Does 's words carry so much weight, more than ours, who love you guys so much? Aren't we the ones that matter more b/c we care? I think that sometimes when you're in the public eye, things get misconstrued b/c you don't have the time to really get to know everyone. Even not in the public eye, when you have casual conversations, it gets taken out of context & is not what you really mean. I do that a fair bit, I think, b/c I can't get all my words out appropriately, so who knows what other people thing about me & what I've SAID, not what I MEANT. Love & peace to everyone (corny....) > -- > Marie A. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 I don't have autism, but my daughter , age 13, does. She has a diagnosis of HFA. I have tried to provide her with many opportunities to learn and grow and experience the world, and while she is maturing into a lovely teenager (or teenangel as we call it!), autism is a part of who she is. I have worked hard to help her accept it as a part of who she is, and as all that she is makes her a unique and special gift, taking away the part that is " autism " is not something we talk about because I don't want her to grow up feeling that a part of her is shameful or bad or diseased. We talk about the challenges she faces with autism, and the challenges those without autism face so she knows that everyone has some challenges they deal with. Hers may seem very significant at times, and at other times her autism may give her unique and insightful perspectives and experiences that she otherwise would not experience. I'm not saying that autism is " easy " or trying to minimize its impact at all. I simply am of the mindset that self- awareness and self-acceptance can help us be all that we can be. I don't know that I think those with autism should just " let it go " if a comment that " adults with autism do not exist " was really made. I did not try to find transcripts, and I was not present, so I'll continue from that perspective. Should women have just " let it go " when men did not believe they should vote? Should minorities have just " let it go " in the same situation? Should parents just " let it go " when a teacher says inclusion doesn't matter or doesn't work for kids with autism? When someone/some group works to minimize your value as a person because of some characteristic that defines who you are, letting it go isn't always the best choice. While Ms. McCarthy may not have intended to devalue adults with autism (and all those that would be adults!), if she made the statement then I believe this is a pretty serious issue that, if made publicly through national television or some other mass medium (which we know she has access to) could really hurt those with autism. If this comment was made by Ms. McCarthy, I hope that my daughter never hears it. She is a literal thinker, as are many people with autism. How will she interpret that comment? Will she perceive that it means she will never grow to be an adult because adults with autism don't exist? Will she think that if her autism has not been " cured " prior to adulthood she is damaged or defective? I'm sure the point about " letting it go " was simply meant to imply that we move on to another topic on this list. I just wanted to provide another perspective! I'm fairly new to this group and I'm not intending to be offensive, just maybe thought-provoking or conversation-inducing! - Dorene in Pittsburgh, mom to , almost 14 and all-around amazing kid! > > > I have met many parents who do nothing for their kids except to " accept it " & I have also met many others who do so much to try to heal their child. I am always amazed at the number of parents who think " it's too hard to do " , or I don't want to belong to a support group b/c all they do is complain, etc. > > Since I don't know in what context said that there are no adults with autism, I don't know that she really meant that the adults didn't exist. How could they NOT exist??? Because not all treatments recover everyone on the spectrum, not everyone gets " cured " , " recovered " or any other terminology. > > Besides, is only one person & it may be her opinion, but we can discard it as just that, IF that is what she really meant. I don't know her, but it seems she may say things " off the cuff " & did she really mean that adults on the spectrum didn't exist. It doesn't make sense since she has met some adults on the spectrum, does it? > > Sondra, Kassi, can you guys " let it go " & not let it hurt your feeling or make you angry. As others have said, you guys on the spectrum give me so much insight into my child's possible thoughts or explain what might be going on from an " autistic's " perspective. (I'm using autistics, like diabetics & hope I don't offend, not my intention). Does 's words carry so much weight, more than ours, who love you guys so much? Aren't we the ones that matter more b/c we care? > > I think that sometimes when you're in the public eye, things get misconstrued b/c you don't have the time to really get to know everyone. Even not in the public eye, when you have casual conversations, it gets taken out of context & is not what you really mean. I do that a fair bit, I think, b/c I can't get all my words out appropriately, so who knows what other people thing about me & what I've SAID, not what I MEANT. > > Love & peace to everyone (corny....) > > > -- > > Marie A. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 I don't have autism, but my daughter , age 13, does. She has a diagnosis of HFA. I have tried to provide her with many opportunities to learn and grow and experience the world, and while she is maturing into a lovely teenager (or teenangel as we call it!), autism is a part of who she is. I have worked hard to help her accept it as a part of who she is, and as all that she is makes her a unique and special gift, taking away the part that is " autism " is not something we talk about because I don't want her to grow up feeling that a part of her is shameful or bad or diseased. We talk about the challenges she faces with autism, and the challenges those without autism face so she knows that everyone has some challenges they deal with. Hers may seem very significant at times, and at other times her autism may give her unique and insightful perspectives and experiences that she otherwise would not experience. I'm not saying that autism is " easy " or trying to minimize its impact at all. I simply am of the mindset that self- awareness and self-acceptance can help us be all that we can be. I don't know that I think those with autism should just " let it go " if a comment that " adults with autism do not exist " was really made. I did not try to find transcripts, and I was not present, so I'll continue from that perspective. Should women have just " let it go " when men did not believe they should vote? Should minorities have just " let it go " in the same situation? Should parents just " let it go " when a teacher says inclusion doesn't matter or doesn't work for kids with autism? When someone/some group works to minimize your value as a person because of some characteristic that defines who you are, letting it go isn't always the best choice. While Ms. McCarthy may not have intended to devalue adults with autism (and all those that would be adults!), if she made the statement then I believe this is a pretty serious issue that, if made publicly through national television or some other mass medium (which we know she has access to) could really hurt those with autism. If this comment was made by Ms. McCarthy, I hope that my daughter never hears it. She is a literal thinker, as are many people with autism. How will she interpret that comment? Will she perceive that it means she will never grow to be an adult because adults with autism don't exist? Will she think that if her autism has not been " cured " prior to adulthood she is damaged or defective? I'm sure the point about " letting it go " was simply meant to imply that we move on to another topic on this list. I just wanted to provide another perspective! I'm fairly new to this group and I'm not intending to be offensive, just maybe thought-provoking or conversation-inducing! - Dorene in Pittsburgh, mom to , almost 14 and all-around amazing kid! > > > I have met many parents who do nothing for their kids except to " accept it " & I have also met many others who do so much to try to heal their child. I am always amazed at the number of parents who think " it's too hard to do " , or I don't want to belong to a support group b/c all they do is complain, etc. > > Since I don't know in what context said that there are no adults with autism, I don't know that she really meant that the adults didn't exist. How could they NOT exist??? Because not all treatments recover everyone on the spectrum, not everyone gets " cured " , " recovered " or any other terminology. > > Besides, is only one person & it may be her opinion, but we can discard it as just that, IF that is what she really meant. I don't know her, but it seems she may say things " off the cuff " & did she really mean that adults on the spectrum didn't exist. It doesn't make sense since she has met some adults on the spectrum, does it? > > Sondra, Kassi, can you guys " let it go " & not let it hurt your feeling or make you angry. As others have said, you guys on the spectrum give me so much insight into my child's possible thoughts or explain what might be going on from an " autistic's " perspective. (I'm using autistics, like diabetics & hope I don't offend, not my intention). Does 's words carry so much weight, more than ours, who love you guys so much? Aren't we the ones that matter more b/c we care? > > I think that sometimes when you're in the public eye, things get misconstrued b/c you don't have the time to really get to know everyone. Even not in the public eye, when you have casual conversations, it gets taken out of context & is not what you really mean. I do that a fair bit, I think, b/c I can't get all my words out appropriately, so who knows what other people thing about me & what I've SAID, not what I MEANT. > > Love & peace to everyone (corny....) > > > -- > > Marie A. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 > Since I don't know in what context said that there are no > adults with > autism, I don't know that she really meant that the adults didn't > exist. > How could they NOT exist??? Because not all treatments recover > everyone on > the spectrum, not everyone gets " cured " , " recovered " or any other > terminology. > > Besides, is only one person & it may be her opinion, but we can > discard it as just that, IF that is what she really meant. I don't > know > her, but it seems she may say things " off the cuff " & did she > really mean > that adults on the spectrum didn't exist. It doesn't make sense > since she > has met some adults on the spectrum, does it? I've seen and read every interview and story with McCarthy. Marie has really summarized what is going on here. is a quirky celebrity and has her own way of putting things, and yes, sometimes she could use a bit more tact and discretion with her words. The key is to look beyond her often scattered narratives to what the essential message is she is trying to send. At first I screamed at the T.V. " No ....it's not 'wheat and dairy', it's gluten and casein! " But her message was that the proper diet changes can make a world of difference, physiologically and cognitively. Anyone who wanted to explore that further would soon learn all the intricacies involved in the diet, not just the oversimplified version related by Ms. McCarthy. The now-infamous statement which has been boiled down to " There are no autistic adults " , has indeed been misunderstood, in my opinion. I'm pretty sure I know in exactly what context she meant this because she and many others have tried to convey this same message many times in many different settings. This is in response to all those blasted " experts " out there who are constantly invalidating what most of us parents, teachers, specialists and others who work with autistic children know.... there has been a dramatic increase in autism in the last two decades. It is infuriating when we are constantly told that the current rate of autism (1 in 150 and often much higher depending on gender or location), is merely due to " better diagnosis " and " autism awareness " . 's (and others') question in response to that is simply then " Where are all the autistic adults? " She does not mean that there aren't ANY, or even that there aren't MANY, but rather, if the rate of actual autism has not increased, then 1 in 150 adults in every age group should be autistic. That's all she was saying.... not literally where are they? (they don't exist), but where are they? (a rhetorical question). Acknowledging that there has been a dramatic increase in both the existence of autism as well as the severity (I don't remember ever seeing a single child like my daughter when I was growing up and I see them EVERYWHERE now), does not negate that there are plenty of autistic adults, and I don't believe that's what was trying to say. Her message, if we look beyond her sometimes irritating delivery is that there is hope and help out there for those that want or need it. Some may not want or need any of her advice or information, but others may be led to pursue diet changes, alternative treatments or just simply to educate themselves to better understand their loved ones and help them achieve their fullest potential, whatever that is. For me, I love and accept my daughter completely RIGHT NOW, and over the years as she has continued to make slow and steady progress, I still love her the same, wherever she is RIGHT NOW. There is no yesterday or tomorrow, only NOW. When we get to tomorrow, it will also be NOW. I am always striving for a better NOW while always loving her completely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 12, 2007 Report Share Posted November 12, 2007 > Since I don't know in what context said that there are no > adults with > autism, I don't know that she really meant that the adults didn't > exist. > How could they NOT exist??? Because not all treatments recover > everyone on > the spectrum, not everyone gets " cured " , " recovered " or any other > terminology. > > Besides, is only one person & it may be her opinion, but we can > discard it as just that, IF that is what she really meant. I don't > know > her, but it seems she may say things " off the cuff " & did she > really mean > that adults on the spectrum didn't exist. It doesn't make sense > since she > has met some adults on the spectrum, does it? I've seen and read every interview and story with McCarthy. Marie has really summarized what is going on here. is a quirky celebrity and has her own way of putting things, and yes, sometimes she could use a bit more tact and discretion with her words. The key is to look beyond her often scattered narratives to what the essential message is she is trying to send. At first I screamed at the T.V. " No ....it's not 'wheat and dairy', it's gluten and casein! " But her message was that the proper diet changes can make a world of difference, physiologically and cognitively. Anyone who wanted to explore that further would soon learn all the intricacies involved in the diet, not just the oversimplified version related by Ms. McCarthy. The now-infamous statement which has been boiled down to " There are no autistic adults " , has indeed been misunderstood, in my opinion. I'm pretty sure I know in exactly what context she meant this because she and many others have tried to convey this same message many times in many different settings. This is in response to all those blasted " experts " out there who are constantly invalidating what most of us parents, teachers, specialists and others who work with autistic children know.... there has been a dramatic increase in autism in the last two decades. It is infuriating when we are constantly told that the current rate of autism (1 in 150 and often much higher depending on gender or location), is merely due to " better diagnosis " and " autism awareness " . 's (and others') question in response to that is simply then " Where are all the autistic adults? " She does not mean that there aren't ANY, or even that there aren't MANY, but rather, if the rate of actual autism has not increased, then 1 in 150 adults in every age group should be autistic. That's all she was saying.... not literally where are they? (they don't exist), but where are they? (a rhetorical question). Acknowledging that there has been a dramatic increase in both the existence of autism as well as the severity (I don't remember ever seeing a single child like my daughter when I was growing up and I see them EVERYWHERE now), does not negate that there are plenty of autistic adults, and I don't believe that's what was trying to say. Her message, if we look beyond her sometimes irritating delivery is that there is hope and help out there for those that want or need it. Some may not want or need any of her advice or information, but others may be led to pursue diet changes, alternative treatments or just simply to educate themselves to better understand their loved ones and help them achieve their fullest potential, whatever that is. For me, I love and accept my daughter completely RIGHT NOW, and over the years as she has continued to make slow and steady progress, I still love her the same, wherever she is RIGHT NOW. There is no yesterday or tomorrow, only NOW. When we get to tomorrow, it will also be NOW. I am always striving for a better NOW while always loving her completely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2007 Report Share Posted November 13, 2007 marie not angry or hurt by the words because not know of her , but confused by the words bringed here saying that she felt adults do not exist . I to be of responding to the thinking of that but not in regards to her alone as a person. I to often get confused by concepts and thinking that do not seem to have a sound logic to it not so much the people unless feeling attacked by a person ten more than anger I to feel fear and confusions as lack why the attack as many I to learned as you shared will assume things of me that do not have a truth in it or of my real intent of what was trying to communicate of it. Yes to carry of the words in relation to a unknown to me person for me is not always a thing I to do. If they are familar and a drastic change occurs in that knowings of each other it causes me to not be to let go of it because for me need to understand of it in complete so that my logic is one that makes of sense to me. There was of only one person who seemed to find ways to hurt me on a few lists and attack in ways to me that caused me to feel so much fear and hurt by her words. From her perspective she saw of her own truth she developed in her thinking of me and was quick to share of it in ways that were of great degrade to me. it caused me so much inner chaos I to could not cope it because felt powerless to know how ot defend of self and or understand the logic behind of her attacks. I was to be of very stuck into that event and felt frozen unable to move on. it caused me a depression in a very bad way because all the things the family felt of me, public views of me came to me like a huge weigt and felt in the life of me I to had no right to be of a human and live because could not do life right and it cycled me to a severe depressions of no self esteem, no sense of being, no inner worth of value and so it caused the suicide irrational thinking of that to be so strong I to had to go to into more intense therapy. a few months later a very close friend at least felt she was in my life withdrew of her friendship and it caused me to cycle again and felt could not understand why one who shared I was to be of her best froend for a few years and she supported and helped me suddenly turn on me and she too then developed a misconception of my actions and words and maked it feel twisted and not of the real truth. such as when one is of very dear to me and I to much feel connected to them and enjoy of their beings I to refer to them with the word " MY " in front of it showing from my perspective a love for them. this person twisted that and after she no longer was of being my friend but hurting and attacking telled me I to did that in the fashion to show of ownership of her. this was never an concept within me I to had of her ever, and it hurt of me greatly that she assumed that and used that in the way she was to do. it left me with huge gaps and fears of ever building a friendhip again. I to now find if people try to get into my world in the real of life , I to find self sabbatoging it by avoiding them, fearing them, and the fear because almost like a paranoia and causes a severe need to avoid that person at all cost. Even though others have shared her or hims intent is of just wanting to be of a friend. my brain is forever probablly stuck to that concept and fight harder to never accept a person in the life of me to get of close to me as in friendship. I to not want of one ever now. but do accept friendships that are of a based off words and not in the real of life seeing, touching and or hearing the person. it fears me too much and so for now cant work through that yet. so I to understand aobut the concept of how others can assume things much quickly or take of words from one context and switch it to mean something much not right in another concepts. Sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2007 Report Share Posted November 13, 2007 marie not angry or hurt by the words because not know of her , but confused by the words bringed here saying that she felt adults do not exist . I to be of responding to the thinking of that but not in regards to her alone as a person. I to often get confused by concepts and thinking that do not seem to have a sound logic to it not so much the people unless feeling attacked by a person ten more than anger I to feel fear and confusions as lack why the attack as many I to learned as you shared will assume things of me that do not have a truth in it or of my real intent of what was trying to communicate of it. Yes to carry of the words in relation to a unknown to me person for me is not always a thing I to do. If they are familar and a drastic change occurs in that knowings of each other it causes me to not be to let go of it because for me need to understand of it in complete so that my logic is one that makes of sense to me. There was of only one person who seemed to find ways to hurt me on a few lists and attack in ways to me that caused me to feel so much fear and hurt by her words. From her perspective she saw of her own truth she developed in her thinking of me and was quick to share of it in ways that were of great degrade to me. it caused me so much inner chaos I to could not cope it because felt powerless to know how ot defend of self and or understand the logic behind of her attacks. I was to be of very stuck into that event and felt frozen unable to move on. it caused me a depression in a very bad way because all the things the family felt of me, public views of me came to me like a huge weigt and felt in the life of me I to had no right to be of a human and live because could not do life right and it cycled me to a severe depressions of no self esteem, no sense of being, no inner worth of value and so it caused the suicide irrational thinking of that to be so strong I to had to go to into more intense therapy. a few months later a very close friend at least felt she was in my life withdrew of her friendship and it caused me to cycle again and felt could not understand why one who shared I was to be of her best froend for a few years and she supported and helped me suddenly turn on me and she too then developed a misconception of my actions and words and maked it feel twisted and not of the real truth. such as when one is of very dear to me and I to much feel connected to them and enjoy of their beings I to refer to them with the word " MY " in front of it showing from my perspective a love for them. this person twisted that and after she no longer was of being my friend but hurting and attacking telled me I to did that in the fashion to show of ownership of her. this was never an concept within me I to had of her ever, and it hurt of me greatly that she assumed that and used that in the way she was to do. it left me with huge gaps and fears of ever building a friendhip again. I to now find if people try to get into my world in the real of life , I to find self sabbatoging it by avoiding them, fearing them, and the fear because almost like a paranoia and causes a severe need to avoid that person at all cost. Even though others have shared her or hims intent is of just wanting to be of a friend. my brain is forever probablly stuck to that concept and fight harder to never accept a person in the life of me to get of close to me as in friendship. I to not want of one ever now. but do accept friendships that are of a based off words and not in the real of life seeing, touching and or hearing the person. it fears me too much and so for now cant work through that yet. so I to understand aobut the concept of how others can assume things much quickly or take of words from one context and switch it to mean something much not right in another concepts. Sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2007 Report Share Posted November 13, 2007 I enjoy lurking and reading here. Just have to say-- I cringe every time I see an article with the combination of M and autism. I appreciate her attempts to share her story, and educate others, but she needs a lot more background experience with all levels of autism-- not just her story. She needs to visit facilities and group homes where autistic adults do live. She needs to see the full scope before declaring herself spokesperson. And I also get tired of the 'early intervention' people screaming that if every autistic child was caught early enough they could be cured. I worked with my child, to the point of exhaustion and have gone through therapist after therapist. Had my hopes built up and crashed with this approach and that. Time has been the only thing that has brought improvements. My child will be an autistic adult. I accept that. Its one part of who she is, not the sum total. Some people are disabled. We encourage them to be the best they can. But we need to accept that our own will to change a situation is not realistic in every instance. We love, we teach, we accept. That is our gift to our children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2007 Report Share Posted November 13, 2007 I enjoy lurking and reading here. Just have to say-- I cringe every time I see an article with the combination of M and autism. I appreciate her attempts to share her story, and educate others, but she needs a lot more background experience with all levels of autism-- not just her story. She needs to visit facilities and group homes where autistic adults do live. She needs to see the full scope before declaring herself spokesperson. And I also get tired of the 'early intervention' people screaming that if every autistic child was caught early enough they could be cured. I worked with my child, to the point of exhaustion and have gone through therapist after therapist. Had my hopes built up and crashed with this approach and that. Time has been the only thing that has brought improvements. My child will be an autistic adult. I accept that. Its one part of who she is, not the sum total. Some people are disabled. We encourage them to be the best they can. But we need to accept that our own will to change a situation is not realistic in every instance. We love, we teach, we accept. That is our gift to our children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2007 Report Share Posted November 13, 2007 It still baffles me that intelligent people are taking > someone who called herself an Indigo Child and " enjoys > farting " seriously on scientific matters anyway. LOL!!!! Thanks for the laugh. You got that right! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.