beating myself up about beating myself up--Pip

[Guest guest]

Dear Pip,

Welcome to the list. That's a great first step, to accept where you are now

with your tendency to beat yourself up. I find one of the things the Work

can help me with is to show me the costs to myself for hanging on to certain

thoughts or patterns of behavior.

I haven't seen your work, so I don't know what you've done specifically.

Have you inquired into what you're supposedly accomplishing by beating

yourself up?

" I need to beat myself up so that... "

" If I don't beat myself up, such and such terrible thing will happen. "

Here's mine:

**I need to beat myself up before other people decide they need to do it.

1. No. 2. No. 3. In their business, trying to stop them from being mad at

me; running away from knowing what they really want; trying to show that I'm

a step ahead; thinking about my work on spanking again; squinting so that I

can't really see; hunching down to be shorter; tense in my belly and neck;

jumping to a conclusion to escape the unknown; anxious; scurrying; knotting

my brow; closed off from everything.

4. Waiting; letting others' anger come at me; less than 100% guaranteed to

get beaten up, now; getting out of the control game; saving that energy for

something else; getting quieter, opener and softer inside.

TAs: I don't need to beat myself up before other people decide to.

Other people don't need to beat me up...that's their business if they do.

Nothing I can do.

Anyone see more?

Love,

Bev

> -----Original Message-----

>

.... this morning i did the work on beating myself up and

> came to realise that i beat myself up about beating myself up ..now

> thats beautiful... hahaha .... anyway i guess if i beat myself up

> then thats ok ... and possibly i need to investigate the thought

> behind the thought ...