Why everyone must attend the alumni reunion

[Guest guest]

Why everyone must attend the alumni reunion

No one should miss the opportunity to attend the Silver jubilee reunions of

our college batches. There are many advantages. Here are five top reasons:

For males:

1. You can see how others have aged into pot bellied, balding old men, while

you have maintained your debonair and youthful looks. (Except for the fact

that you have dyed and re-dyed your hair five times, before deciding that

your bald spot would be better hidden under a wig. Don't forget to wear a

well fitting denture.)

2. You can show your ex flame what a blunder she made in rejecting you, by

standing in front of her husband and allowing her to compare the both of

you. (Of course, you need to suck in your stomach and wear hidden heels in

your shoes.)

3. You can easily emphasize how well you have done in life, by constantly

remarking how hot it is, especially while stepping out of your air

conditioned Mercedes. (However, you must be careful in instructing your

children not to let out the fact that the car is hired for the occasion.)

4. You can get an opportunity to thank all your ex teachers for the efforts

they took to mould such an insignificant guy like you into a leading pillar

of society. (You can also discuss with your friends how that crabby

professor tried his very best to fail you, but you passed anyway because of

your lecturer friend.)

5. You can get to know the recent mortality statistics of your batch and

rejoice that you are still alive and kicking. (Of course, the fact that you

take tons of anti hypertensives, hypoglycemics and anti-asthmatics just to

climb the few stairs leading to the lift of your building is irrelevant.)

For females:

1. You can show your batch mates what a handsome and intelligent husband you

have snagged, despite the fact that you were the last one in your batch to

get hitched. (You need not mention that he has a drinking problem and you

have recently caught him red handed philandering away.)

2. You can display your well-behaved and quiet kids in contrast to the other

rowdy hooligans your batch mates have. (But make sure you leave the party

before the sedative wears off.)

3. The kilos of jewelry should be proof of your hard earned success. (But

take good care of it, otherwise your sister will scream when you return it.)

4. You can look condescendingly at the poor wimp of a wife your ex- fiancée

has by his side and tell him, " My! You have such a nice wife! " (Adding in a

sotto voce: Must be great fun at funerals.)

5. You finally get to know whom that Sexy Sheila married, after moving

around with 6 boys.

For Children:

1. You can share tips with your co-sufferers on how to deal with the MGIMS

style lunacy of parents. You also get to learn that all madness is not

inherited, and most can be acquired along with college education.

2. You can tease your Dad about his girl friend who has buckteeth and looks

like King Kong, only slightly hairier.

3. You can learn amazing facts like the fact that your Dad was called a

Zingoor in his college days. These facts can be used later for blackmail.

4. You finally verify the fact that your mother passed in her first attempt

in all exams, but only after wearing low cut clothes.

5. When your mum's friends remark, " My, my! You have grown so big! " , you

can coolly answer, " Same to you, ma'am. "

Kishore Shah 1974

(There Dilip, I have pasted the article which appears in the recent news

bulletin of MGIMS)