CFS & Type A Personalities

[Guest guest]

People who develop severe chronic fatigue are often Type A individuals

who were overachievers before they got ill. As they start to get

better, they have a tendency to try and make up for lost time and to

try to get everything done that they couldn't for the last three to

ten years. DON'T. Initially, use the energy that you get back to start

doing things that feel good. Most of the things that have been built

up over time can go without ever being done. LET THEM. As you start

feeling better, take your time adding in new things. Pick and choose

those things that you really want to be doing. Don't go " shoulding "

(should do this, should do that) on yourself.

Source: Teitelbaum, M.D

[Guest guest]

I believe the whole " Type A " personality thing. And I'm really with him on the

" don't overdo it " thing too. That is SOooooooo true........we will never really

" catch up " so just try to enjoy the good days!

Jane

lynn paulino wrote:

I read that in his book too! But I'm not an

overachiever so I'm in the minority but I could be a

Type A because I'm antsy and don't know how to rest.

I'm also not a control freak which he said in his

book. In fact, I'm just the opposite. Oh Well! God

Bless, Lynn

--- cfpenpal wrote:

> People who develop severe chronic fatigue are often

> Type A individuals

> who were overachievers before they got ill. As they

> start to get

> better, they have a tendency to try and make up for

> lost time and to

> try to get everything done that they couldn't for

> the last three to

> ten years.

[Guest guest]

I am a type " A " personality... and after all these year with CFS you would

think that I would try to break the habit.... even in my Bio-feedback I'm still

type 'A "

Ginny

Jane Luft wrote:

I believe the whole " Type A " personality thing. And I'm really with him on

the " don't overdo it " thing too. That is SOooooooo true........we will never

really " catch up " so just try to enjoy the good days!

Jane

[Guest guest]

Hi Jane! I believe it but I am definitely not one of

them in the sense that I'm a workaholic. But yes I do

push myself sometimes. I loved his book! It was very

well written and easy to read! God bless, Lynn

--- Jane Luft wrote:

> I believe the whole " Type A " personality thing. And

> I'm really with him on the " don't overdo it " thing

> too. That is SOooooooo true........we will never

> really " catch up " so just try to enjoy the good

> days!

> Jane

>

> lynn paulino wrote:

> I read that in his book too! But I'm not an

> overachiever so I'm in the minority but I could be a

> Type A because I'm antsy and don't know how to rest.

>

> I'm also not a control freak which he said in his

> book. In fact, I'm just the opposite. Oh Well!

> God

> Bless, Lynn

>

> --- cfpenpal wrote:

>

> > People who develop severe chronic fatigue are

> often

> > Type A individuals

> > who were overachievers before they got ill. As

> they

> > start to get

> > better, they have a tendency to try and make up

> for

> > lost time and to

> > try to get everything done that they couldn't for

> > the last three to

> > ten years.

>

>

>

test'; " >

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Hi Ginny! I'm trying to break the habit also! But

I'm not what you would call an overachiever. However,

I don't know when to stop and rest but I'm learning.

I called you on Saturday but you weren't home. I'll

try again soon. If for some reason you call and the

line is busy in the evening it just means I'm online.

God Bless, Lynn

--- Virginia Dempsey wrote:

> I am a type " A " personality... and after all these

> year with CFS you would think that I would try to

> break the habit.... even in my Bio-feedback I'm

> still type 'A "

>

>

> Ginny

>

> Jane Luft wrote:

> I believe the whole " Type A " personality thing.

> And I'm really with him on the " don't overdo it "

> thing too. That is SOooooooo true........we will

> never really " catch up " so just try to enjoy the

> good days!

> Jane

>

>

>

test'; " >

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

All this goes way, way back to the original Yuppie Flu thought.

My favorite cartoon was a scruffy looking, long haired, bearded guy

sitting at a scruffy looking bar with another scruffy looking fellow.

As he drinks his beer he says to his buddy, " They say I have the Yuppie

Flu. "

Kate

In a message dated 5/16/2006 7:06:13 AM Pacific Standard Time,

lynnsprinkles@... writes:

Hi Jane! I believe it but I am definitely not one of

them in the sense that I'm a workaholic. But yes I do

push myself sometimes. I loved his book! It was very

well written and easy to read! God bless, Lynn

[Guest guest]

Amen -I think that has been the hardest part for my husband......I've

been slowing down for 7 years now, esp. the last three. He would never SAY

anything about my almost permanent location on the couch, but it was 'the Look " ,

you know the one - saying " why is the house such a mess, no food on the table

and you're just SITTING THERE, watching TV? I have been truly greatful for

cable TV, all of my past hobbies, (painting, drawing, reading, sewing,

embroidery,crafts in general, plus my full time job and 3 kids to raise) are

just too much to handle. If I just sat there without TV too ????? The

depression would set in so deep - I would go outta my mind.....

Unfortunately, he still gets frustrated with my lack of motivation,

Howton wrote:

I think that's part of the problem for most of us is that we're type " A "

people and we have a really hard time accepting that we aren't able to do what

we want our bodies to do. I know for me, I was going all the time, never seemed

to sit down long enough to get the seat warm. I was a person who got up very

early, worked really hard (probably too hard), was very proud of being self

sufficient and a strong person until all this happened. Now I am learning to

take it at a slower pace, try not to down myself for sleeping so much. What's

harderis that our friends, spouses and families also remember us like that and

have as hard a time accepting the slower pace as we do. Keep up the good

thoughts all!

[Guest guest]

I think that another reason why so many 'Type A'

personalities are eventually diagnosed with

CF/Fibro/Lyme Disease is that we won't accept the

diagnosis of 'just accept your condition'; masking

things by taking antidepressants; and/or putting

ourselves out to pasture as has been suggested by

specialists.

[Guest guest]

I HEAR YA! Mine actually said he wished he could stay home all day and watch TV

like I do!!!!! He would get waaaaayyyyy more done than me. Well I'm sure he

might for a few days and then he'd be antsy, bored and whining about how messy

everyone is! I am a Girl Scout leader for my daughters troop so that I can spend

some quality time with her, and after a meeting I am totally wiped out. If it

weren't for that I would have nothing to look forward to. Due to financial

difficulties we only have 1 car and my husband needs it for work, so I only get

out of the house for GS things. I love him to death, but he just doesn't get

IT!!!

Bless ya,

Jane Luft wrote:

Amen -I think that has been the hardest part for my husband......I've

been slowing down for 7 years now, esp. the last three. He would never SAY

anything about my almost permanent location on the couch, but it was 'the Look " ,

you know the one - saying " why is the house such a mess, no food on the table

and you're just SITTING THERE, watching TV? I have been truly greatful for

cable TV, all of my past hobbies, (painting, drawing, reading, sewing,

embroidery,crafts in general, plus my full time job and 3 kids to raise) are

just too much to handle. If I just sat there without TV too ????? The

depression would set in so deep - I would go outta my mind.....

Unfortunately, he still gets frustrated with my lack of motivation,

[Guest guest]

Hi Everyone-I am rather new to this group, and have been just enjoying

the posts and how it relates so much to my life.

When I saw this one on Type A and CFS, I just had to speak up. My

Type A personality is what completely pushed my chronic fatigue over

the edge, to the point of near death. Relaxation was not part of my

vocabulary, and if i had an extra 5 mintyues, I could get done 12

things! It has definitely been a significant factor in my recovery.

Jeepers, it is hard to relax! But, when I do, I feel tons better and

have so much more energy. It is like breaking an old habit.

Thanks for sharing, as it certainly helps to not be alone.

Sheryl

[Guest guest]

Hi all:

Yes, I used to be Type A. Always on the go, working 2-3 jobs, and doing many

activates. It is so hard not to be able to do this anymore.

Jeanette

Re: Re: CFS & Type A Personalities

> Hi Jane! I believe it but I am definitely not one of

> them in the sense that I'm a workaholic. But yes I do

> push myself sometimes. I loved his book! It was very

> well written and easy to read! God bless, Lynn

[Guest guest]

Hi ! I'm not that way at work but I do tend to

push myself and not rest enough at home. I'm not what

I would consider myself a true perfectionist but I

have some traits that I'm trying to get rid of. Lynn

--- Howton wrote:

> I think that's part of the problem for most of us is

> that we're type " A " people and we have a really hard

> time accepting that we aren't able to do what we

> want our bodies to do. I know for me, I was going

> all the time, never seemed to sit down long enough

> to get the seat warm.

[Guest guest]

Exactly Kate! Lynn

--- ShyCat2@... wrote:

>

> All this goes way, way back to the original Yuppie

> Flu thought.

> My favorite cartoon was a scruffy looking,

> long haired, bearded guy

> sitting at a scruffy looking bar with another

> scruffy looking fellow.

>

> As he drinks his beer he says to his buddy, " They

> say I have the Yuppie

> Flu. "

>

> Kate

[Guest guest]

Jane, I totally understand from your point of view. It's not a lack of

motivation, it's dreading the pain in doing something and the days of pain

from getting over it!

Rhonda

Re: CFS & Type A Personalities

Amen -I think that has been the hardest part for my husband......I've

been slowing down for 7 years now, esp. the last three. He would never SAY

anything about my almost permanent location on the couch, but it was 'the

Look " , you know the one - saying " why is the house such a mess, no food on

the table and you're just SITTING THERE, watching TV?

[Guest guest]

AMEN!

Jane

Rhonda Huffman wrote: Jane, I totally

understand from your point of view. It's not a lack of

motivation, it's dreading the pain in doing something and the days of pain

from getting over it!

Rhonda

[Guest guest]

Hi ya,

I'll see if I can locate it... but the title is

something like:

CFS, Fybro, & Lyme Disease (yes, all spelt out!)

It caught my eye as I was originally diagnosed with

CFS; then Adrenal Fatigue; and finally got the

positive test results that it had been Lyme Disease.

/ Charolette :-)

[Guest guest]

righto--slow down the pace...

jeanette

Re: CFS & Type A Personalities

> Hi Jeanette! I have 'pushing myself' in me but not at

> work! However, I used to always be on the go. Then I

> crashed. Go figure it! Lynn

[Guest guest]

Hi Jane,

I just found the whole type A personality thing infuriating. I don't

know what kind of book you all are reading but the Yuppie Flu idea went out

long ago, about 15 years ago. I don't think blaming your personality for this

disease is productive.

I worked with 30 support groups in NE for many years as well as with the

MA. CFIDS Association and worked very hard to dispel that kind of thinking.

After working with hundreds of PWC's I know that it is simply not true.

And, yes, it does affect young women but it affects middle-aged women,

young men, middle-aged men and children of all ages. One of the middle-aged

women is now on the Memorial list as well as others I knew.

We worked very hard to dispel that whole type A personality thing so I

found it hard to read these posts.

Kate

In a message dated 5/18/2006 6:07:05 AM Pacific Standard Time,

janel450@... writes:

Morning Kate,

That's priceless! I think we probably all agree that term is the worst for

what we are all going thru, but in a way, look at who this disease effects

the most - young, very active women. We've all been pushing our systems so

hard, for so long, raising kids,going to school, working in and out of the

home, trying to be Martha and keeping our very busy lives together

and haning on by a thread, Holy Cow! Why wouldn't our systems shut us down?

I just keep praying and working for an answer

Jane

[Guest guest]

Teitelbaum, MD - From Fatigued to Fantastic!

I checked it out at the Library - Very informative

rshuck23 wrote:

I am so sorry-I must have missed the original post. What book is

everyone referring to that has been helpful?

Sheryl

[Guest guest]

,

You are very fortunate to have a supportive husband. Mine is trying and

getting better, but there is still room to grow. My daughter is a Godsend - she

is 15 now and this started when she was 8, but didn't get really bad until she

hit about 12. She is loving and caring, offering to make me food or get me

anything I need. She'll rub my back or curl up on the couch with me to watch

some silly old movie. I think men,in general, just don't have that empathy

thing going on. My sons are pretty indifferent to it all. My 16 yr old son

just complains that I don't have meals on the table! Holy Cow - he has no

concept, but I pray he will someday understand!

I've gained weight over the past 5 years and up until about 6 mos ago, my

husband would just say " well, you need to get more excercise and you'd feel

better " - I love him, but just wanted to smack him awake, ya know? Even though

he's sees, he doesn't quite get it and, like you, I would like him to have this

ONE WEEK, then he'd get it. Of course, I wouldn't wish it on anyone either.

So, I must be patient with all who don't understand.

I know what you mean about people who don't see you on the day-to-day basis.

My coworkers got it, but my closest friend doesn't....she doesn't see me on

those days. If I have brain fog, she just says, " oh yeah, I forget stuff all

the time " ......it is NOT the same, but you can't convince her of that. Oh

well........so it is. I know family and friends mean well by the advice they

are trying to give..... " shake it off " , " just get out there and do it " ,

" excercise more " .........I just try to take it as they care, but are ignorant

of this disease. I know their hearts are in the right place.

I am so thankful for you and all the wonderful souls out there in this same

boat. This is a wonderful outlet and fount of information.

Take care and here's to more good days than bad!

Jane

wrote:

God Bless you ladies that have spouses that don't understand what

your going through. I am fortunate enough to have a wonderfully

supportive husband that not only has watched the changes to me but

attempts to do all the things I used to. I'm concerned for him

because he works fulltime plus and still comes home to making

dinner, laundry and attempts to keep the house up. He's watched my

attempt to do something and the fatigue hits so suddenly, I'm forced

back to bed and end up sleeping 6 plus hours. I wish he could talk

to your husbands to explain exactly what your going through (as if

that would ever happen)

[Guest guest]

I guess I am also a type A has-been. I barely stopped to sleep, couldn't

anyway. I am 64 with fibro CFS and osteoarthritis. I am so lazy!!!!!!!! I can't

stand myself. Fortunately my good husband never did want me to work so now he is

very understanding. I also lack mental motivation.

Diane in Ks.

[Guest guest]

Isnt' that funny? My husband thinks our kids suddenly are messy !!! WHO did he

think was picking up after everybody all these 20 years - the Cleaning Fairy

?!!! They have no idea what we are going thru, and that's why this forum is so

GREAT!

Hang in there Leader !

Jane

Howton wrote:

I HEAR YA! Mine actually said he wished he could stay home all day and watch

TV like I do!!!!! He would get waaaaayyyyy more done than me. Well I'm sure he

might for a few days and then he'd be antsy, bored and whining about how messy

everyone is! I am a Girl Scout leader for my daughters troop so that I can spend

some quality time with her, and after a meeting I am totally wiped out. If it

weren't for that I would have nothing to look forward to. Due to financial

difficulties we only have 1 car and my husband needs it for work, so I only get

out of the house for GS things. I love him to death, but he just doesn't get

IT!!!

Bless ya,

[Guest guest]

Hi Jane,

I am hardly visible to myself anymore, there is not much left in my shell.

So much is gone, only in memories, which I wish weren't there, cause it

hurts to remember how I used to me.

Take care,

Jeanette

Re: CFS & Type A Personalities

It's like a little death of yourself - I believe it's the most difficult

thing about this disease, I'm just not really myself anymore.

Jane

[Guest guest]

Hi Lynn,

Sorry I didn't get a chance to call... have been very out of it... Had to go

up to Albany for a Aunts Funeral and it has wipped it out... The drive knocked

me out... I did the driving up and my daughter drove back cause I knew I would

be out of it at nite. I work better in the mornings.... Will Try to call

tormorrow if you are going to be around during day.... Will be home all day

tomorrow.

(((soft hugs)))

Ginny

lynn paulino wrote:

Hi Ginny! I'm trying to break the habit also! But

I'm not what you would call an overachiever. However,

I don't know when to stop and rest but I'm learning.

I called you on Saturday but you weren't home. I'll

try again soon. If for some reason you call and the

line is busy in the evening it just means I'm online.

God Bless, Lynn

[Guest guest]

Hi Jeanette! I had off from work today but I had lots

to do. I'm hoping I'm off Sunday so I could stay in

bed and rest all day. I burnt myself out today. LOL

Lynn P.S. How have you been feeling?

--- Jeanette French wrote:

> righto--slow down the pace...

> jeanette