stuck

[Guest guest]

Hi all

Here is where I am. (is that true?)

I have been avoiding doing work for the lset few days.

I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

exist. What's the point?

I just ache inside and I want someone to make it go away.

I'm stuck

I'm in pain.

It hurts too much to take care of me.

I don't want to work.

I want to feel better, NOW.

but I want someone else to make me feel better.

Well, I guess I know what I need to do (or not). but I don't want to do it.

I want to get better but I don't want to do what it takes to get there.

Any support appreciated.

thanks

steve

[Guest guest]

Oof. I know this place, too, Steve. My heart goes out to you.

Here are my thoughts: It sounds to me like you are pressed up against one of

your/our very powerful core beliefs. When you are ready, it might be helpful

to really listen to it if you can find it. How does your thinking WANT to

help you by holding on to this belief? Can you meet it with understanding

and help it find a new solution?

Here are some of the core beliefs I heard in your posting. They resonate a

lot with my own core beliefs:

> I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

> exist. What's the point?

Life is supposed to have meaning. If I can't SEE the point, that means life

doesn't have a point.

If there is meaning in life, I can know what it is.

> I just ache inside and I want someone to make it go away.

I only ache inside and there are no other feelings at all. I can't have more

than one feeling at a time.

> It hurts too much to take care of me.

I can't take care of me. Someone else should take care of me while it hurts

too much for me to do it.

> but I want someone else to make me feel better.

Someone else could make me feel better.

[Guest guest]

Steve I feel it is ok to feel stuck every once in awhile,

just allow your feelings take a break from the work

everyone needs a day or two off...then you can come back to the work with

much more fervor!

Hugs

anna

stuck

> Hi all

>

> Here is where I am. (is that true?)

>

> I have been avoiding doing work for the lset few days.

> I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

> exist. What's the point?

> I just ache inside and I want someone to make it go away.

> I'm stuck

> I'm in pain.

> It hurts too much to take care of me.

> I don't want to work.

> I want to feel better, NOW.

> but I want someone else to make me feel better.

>

> Well, I guess I know what I need to do (or not). but I don't want to do

it.

>

> I want to get better but I don't want to do what it takes to get there.

>

> Any support appreciated.

>

>

> thanks

>

> steve

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

> Hi all

>

> Here is where I am. (is that true?)

>

> I have been avoiding doing work for the lset few days.

> I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

> exist. What's the point?

Hey Steve, Here are a few thoughts to meditate on that may be useful.

Don't you die every night? Do you exist in deep sleep? Is the final

exit really final? Does there need to be a point? Who would you be

without a point? Who supplies the meaning to life? Does anything in

life have meaning without someone to assign meaning? Who do you love?

Do you need a reason to love them? You're " stuck " . Is it true?

You might inquire on the word " stuck " . Feel this stuckness. What is

not okay about " stuck " ? What is underneath " stuck " that is never

stuck?

Just inquiring...Maybe there is a hidden story behind your malaise.

You'll find it.

Love to you

[Guest guest]

Steve,

Much of the work that I do is in a reclining position and kind of like a

koan - " is it true " over and over often while lying down. Just let your mind

seek out and inquire all by itself -just physically relax.

Chuck

Here is where I am. (is that true?)

I have been avoiding doing work for the lset few days.

I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

exist. What's the point?

I just ache inside and I want someone to make it go away.

I'm stuck

I'm in pain.

It hurts too much to take care of me.

I don't want to work.

I want to feel better, NOW.

but I want someone else to make me feel better.

Well, I guess I know what I need to do (or not). but I don't want to do it.

I want to get better but I don't want to do what it takes to get there.

Any support appreciated.

thanks

steve

[Guest guest]

I have been avoiding doing work for the lset few days.

I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

exist. What's the point? I just ache inside and I want someone to make

it go away. I'm stuck I'm in pain. It hurts too much to take care of me.

I don't want to work. I want to feel better, NOW. but I want someone

else to make me feel better.

---These are things that are true at the moment and make sense to me.

There's no rule that every thought that pops out of your head must be

scrutinized by " The Work " . Doing " The Work " is not a job with a time

clock. Sometimes I think you just need to wallow in self pity when you

feel the need, and I see no error there. I do it when I need it too. If

we weren't supposed to do that we probably wouldn't, but we do, so it

must be there for a reason. You are exactly right when you say you're

going to die and not exist some day. As far as I can tell that's true.

And it makes sense to want to have someone " fix it " for you. So far no

one I know can do that. Once you're dead...that problem's solved.

---As for feeling better " NOW " I can get behind that too. But then, that

brings us back to " The Work " . Because to feel better at all, you have to

analyze all those ideas to find one that works, and the best analytical

tool I've found today is " inquiry " .

---If you're going to die, why try to live a better life free of as much

pain as possible? I don't know the answer to that. I suppose each of us

have to come to our own conclusions about how we live this short span we

are allotted on this planet. Some people live Life in pain and confusion

and make no effort to fix it or try to make it better. So I'm assuming

it's Ok to choose that option. But some people try to make the best of

their time here and even if it seems impossible, try to move towards

solutions anyway they can with whatever it takes. It all seems right to

me. Your stated situation all seems right to me too. After all, it's

happening as you state it right? And I know the solution you find as to

how you want the end results to be...that will be right also.

---Here's something I can do for you as you have asked. I can let you in

on something you probably already knew but maybe you forgot. I forget it

too a lot so don't think you're alone in this. No day is the same, the

sun doesn't rise and set on the same planet in its cycles, and only

change, death and taxes are for certain. Today you might want a break

from " The Work " . And why not? It's damn hard stuff and seems to go on

forever. You want someone to fix things for you. That sounds reasonable

to me...it's just that I'm not going to try to fix what only you

control. I don't have that power. Instead of waiting for someone who

does maybe you can get a head start on it yourself. That's an option. So

I've tested the reflexes, heart rate and breathing now and my diagnosis

is you're quite normal. Take a break today from the drama and confusion,

give up...watch TV or listen to good music. What's wrong with that? Hell

I might even join you. This stuff gives me a headache sometimes. But

then as might say " Welcome to The Work " . In any case, everything

you say makes sense to me. And it is a viable option to do nothing about

any of it. I believe that... " no mistake " .

[Guest guest]

Dear Lovers of What Is, Stuck or Not,

There's a passage in Rilke's " Letters To A Young Poet " which Steve

and Anya's posts, and my own feelings this morning, made me think of.

I quote it below in case it might be of comfort to you as it is to

me. (It's from the Eighth Letter).

I am aware that as I write this I am both seeking to give and receive

comfort. As Tom said to Martha, I think my loneliness is trying to

connect with other lonelinesses in hopes of not feeling as alone. I

judge myself for that. I will inquire.

-heidi

----------------

" You must not be frightened… when a sadness arises within you of such

magnitude as you have never experienced, or when a restlessness

overshadows all you do, like light and the shadow of clouds gliding

over your hand. You must believe that something is happening to you,

that life has not forgotten you, that it holds you in its hand. It

shall not let you fall.

" Why should you want to exclude any anxiety, any grief, any

melancholy from your life, since you do not know what it is that

these conditions are accomplishing in you? Why do you want to

persecute yourself with the question of where everything comes from

and where it is headed? You do know that you are in a period of

transition and wish for nothing as much as to transform yourself. If

some aspect of your life is not well, then consider the illness to be

the means for an organism to free itself from something foreign to

it. In that case you must help it to be ill and to have its whole

illness, to let it break out. That is the course of its progress.

" So much is happening within you at present… You need to be as

patient as someone ill and as optimistic as one recuperating, for

perhaps you are both. And more: You are also the physician who must

watch over yourself. But in the course of every illness there are

many days in which the physician can do nothing but wait. And that,

above all, to the extent that you are your physician, you must do

now. "

[Guest guest]

Chuck,

When I first read this, I totally missed what you're saying. I feel blessed

that I got a chance to read this again. This sounds like a way to take time

out to do the work when I resist doing it and don't want to write. Anything

I can do, contributes.

thanks

steve

Re: stuck

Steve,

Much of the work that I do is in a reclining position and kind of like a

koan - " is it true " over and over often while lying down. Just let your mind

seek out and inquire all by itself -just physically relax.

Chuck

Here is where I am. (is that true?)

I have been avoiding doing work for the lset few days.

I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

exist. What's the point?

I just ache inside and I want someone to make it go away.

I'm stuck

I'm in pain.

It hurts too much to take care of me.

I don't want to work.

I want to feel better, NOW.

but I want someone else to make me feel better.

Well, I guess I know what I need to do (or not). but I don't want to do it.

I want to get better but I don't want to do what it takes to get there.

Any support appreciated.

thanks

steve

[Guest guest]

JM

I thoroughly enjoyed your responses. Met my needs for acceptance, fun,

connection, belonging.

I think I'lll just go back to inhaling and exhaling. Seems like a good

place to start (and I can do it sitting, standing or lying down).

thanks

steve

---------------------------

STEVE COLE

Insight - Action - Fulfillment™

Coaching and Training

Accelerating Your Dreams™

The Connection Conversation

Steve@...

A Human Excellence™ Partner

RE: stuck

I have been avoiding doing work for the lset few days.

I don't see the point. Life has no meaning. I am going to die and not

exist. What's the point? I just ache inside and I want someone to make

it go away. I'm stuck I'm in pain. It hurts too much to take care of me.

I don't want to work. I want to feel better, NOW. but I want someone

else to make me feel better.

---These are things that are true at the moment and make sense to me.

There's no rule that every thought that pops out of your head must be

scrutinized by " The Work " . Doing " The Work " is not a job with a time

clock. Sometimes I think you just need to wallow in self pity when you

feel the need, and I see no error there. I do it when I need it too. If

we weren't supposed to do that we probably wouldn't, but we do, so it

must be there for a reason. You are exactly right when you say you're

going to die and not exist some day. As far as I can tell that's true.

And it makes sense to want to have someone " fix it " for you. So far no

one I know can do that. Once you're dead...that problem's solved.

---As for feeling better " NOW " I can get behind that too. But then, that

brings us back to " The Work " . Because to feel better at all, you have to

analyze all those ideas to find one that works, and the best analytical

tool I've found today is " inquiry " .

---If you're going to die, why try to live a better life free of as much

pain as possible? I don't know the answer to that. I suppose each of us

have to come to our own conclusions about how we live this short span we

are allotted on this planet. Some people live Life in pain and confusion

and make no effort to fix it or try to make it better. So I'm assuming

it's Ok to choose that option. But some people try to make the best of

their time here and even if it seems impossible, try to move towards

solutions anyway they can with whatever it takes. It all seems right to

me. Your stated situation all seems right to me too. After all, it's

happening as you state it right? And I know the solution you find as to

how you want the end results to be...that will be right also.

---Here's something I can do for you as you have asked. I can let you in

on something you probably already knew but maybe you forgot. I forget it

too a lot so don't think you're alone in this. No day is the same, the

sun doesn't rise and set on the same planet in its cycles, and only

change, death and taxes are for certain. Today you might want a break

from " The Work " . And why not? It's damn hard stuff and seems to go on

forever. You want someone to fix things for you. That sounds reasonable

to me...it's just that I'm not going to try to fix what only you

control. I don't have that power. Instead of waiting for someone who

does maybe you can get a head start on it yourself. That's an option. So

I've tested the reflexes, heart rate and breathing now and my diagnosis

is you're quite normal. Take a break today from the drama and confusion,

give up...watch TV or listen to good music. What's wrong with that? Hell

I might even join you. This stuff gives me a headache sometimes. But

then as might say " Welcome to The Work " . In any case, everything

you say makes sense to me. And it is a viable option to do nothing about

any of it. I believe that... " no mistake " .

[Guest guest]

Heidi

I just read the first few sentences and had an experience I want to share.

It was the thought that what is arising in me, that anxiety that shows up,

is just life moving around, expressing itself. I went to that life and the

anxiety melted.

That anxiety wasn't ME. It was life. When I looked at life, it opened up.

I can look at what goes on in ME as not ME, but as life unfolding.

Such grace. I am awed.

thanks to you and everyone for your concern, support and love

steve

Re: stuck

Dear Lovers of What Is, Stuck or Not,

There's a passage in Rilke's " Letters To A Young Poet " which Steve

and Anya's posts, and my own feelings this morning, made me think of.

I quote it below in case it might be of comfort to you as it is to

me. (It's from the Eighth Letter).

I am aware that as I write this I am both seeking to give and receive

comfort. As Tom said to Martha, I think my loneliness is trying to

connect with other lonelinesses in hopes of not feeling as alone. I

judge myself for that. I will inquire.

-heidi

----------------

" You must not be frightened… when a sadness arises within you of such

magnitude as you have never experienced, or when a restlessness

overshadows all you do, like light and the shadow of clouds gliding

over your hand. You must believe that something is happening to you,

that life has not forgotten you, that it holds you in its hand. It

shall not let you fall.

" Why should you want to exclude any anxiety, any grief, any

melancholy from your life, since you do not know what it is that

these conditions are accomplishing in you? Why do you want to

persecute yourself with the question of where everything comes from

and where it is headed? You do know that you are in a period of

transition and wish for nothing as much as to transform yourself. If

some aspect of your life is not well, then consider the illness to be

the means for an organism to free itself from something foreign to

it. In that case you must help it to be ill and to have its whole

illness, to let it break out. That is the course of its progress.

" So much is happening within you at present… You need to be as

patient as someone ill and as optimistic as one recuperating, for

perhaps you are both. And more: You are also the physician who must

watch over yourself. But in the course of every illness there are

many days in which the physician can do nothing but wait. And that,

above all, to the extent that you are your physician, you must do

now. "