Re: Everybody has arthritis?

November 12, 2005

Dear Kerri,

Everybody has arthritis???? I feel a rant coming on,

but I better swallow it and use my aching hands more

productively. I know what you mean about it hurting

more when it comes from family. My family is very

nice, but they can't always keep the disappointment

out of their voices when I have to bug out of all the

fun things we used to do. I hope your sister has some

kind of realization some day and can grow some

empathy.

best wishes, laura

--- kerri paquette <ksp2242@...> wrote:

> The most callous and flippant person in my life is

> my sister.... I'd like to know how to deal with it

> when it comes to family, because my way of dealing

> with it has been pretty much cutting her out of my

> life for now, I don't call, don't email, so she'll

> call once every couple of weeks or stop by once a

> month to see the kids, maybe I seem coldhearted...

> but I'm tired of her referring to me as " just bored "

> " needing exercise " once when all I had to offer her

> were caffiene-free drinks, she put her fingers in

> the air and made the quotes to say " damn you and

> your so-called health problems " she thought it was

> funny. If my daughter goes to her house, she comes

> back, saying things like, why don't you have a job

> and there's no reason we can't go out shopping

> today. Not to mention how many times she's said,

> stop complaining, everybody has arthritis. Funny

> thing is I don't complain, not out loud anyway,

> she'll say that when she sees me wince getting up

> from a chair or limp. So, I'm not amused

> by her.... I can be amused by everyone else's

> ignorance, but her's is hurtful and hateful. I'm

> only 28 years old and she is the only close family I

> have but it hurts me too much to even look at her

> sometimes. What do you do then? Sorry for the

> whining, but I was due, lol. Hope everyone else is

> having a warm good day.

>

> kerri sue

>

> rmcg <rmcg@...> wrote:

> Ok, my two and a half cents here.

> I have had physical difficulties all my life, so I

> hope that I'm emphatic with others.

> However, I do get disgusted with those who have

> never ever had any physical problems and no clue

> whatsoever how hard it can be for those of us who do

> have problems.

> i.e: DH had heart attack. One month later, BIL was

> harrassing him about making plans for a cross

> country driving trip and wanted a committment NOW.

> Needless to say, he/we did not go, but BIL still

> doesn't understand why we wouldn't go. (even if dh

> had been in condition,no way would I be able to

> make the type of trip BIL would have wanted)

>

> That's an extreme example, but I run into it all the

> time. I wouldn't want to wish anything on anyone,

> but I do wish that people would get a minute bit of

> understanding when I/we say " I hurt " , or " I can't " .

> I guess I just drop those that are too insenstive,

> but what does one do with family?

>

> End of rant. g* Back to regularly scheduled list.

>

> Thanks for putting up with me. <G>

>

> Rose

> ----- Original Message -----

> From: brightt@...

>

> >>>>>

>

> Every once in a while I try to educate someone

> about what living with

> RA is like, but they rarely understand. After that

> day, I thought why

> worry about it? Why waste my energy unless someone

> has sincere

> interest? I'm trying to keep this perspective and

> just be wryly amused

> by some of the strange/insensitive/uninformed

> things people say about

> RA. Of course, I know this attitude is nearly

> impossible for those of

> you who have spouses, children, etc. who aren't

> understanding. I'm

> fortunate to live with just my 2 dogs, who really

> have no opinion about

> it and are especially loving when I'm in pain.

>

> Many good wishes to each one of you brave people.

>

> Prakasha

>

November 12, 2005