Re: Re: boundaries...and fathers...and mothers

[Guest guest]

thanksforthisday wrote:

> My father wasn't subtle, he was bombastic. Very clear to see

> what he was doing, it was always all or nothing. Nada was

> subtle, she knew how to " abuse with an eyebrow " . I preferred my

> father's style bec. I knew how to deal with things right there.

Amen, Kathleen. Give me direct communication any day.

> When I was a kid with nada's FOO, they would be whispering in the

> dining room and when I walked in, there would be a feigned

> cheerfulness and a quick glancing around the table. I knew they were

> talking about me. It was awful.

Oh, Kathleen, don't you just hate that crap? I can remember the same

thing. But I can also think back to many times when mom and *I* were

talking (actually I did more listening than talking, as she denigrated

others in the family), and someone would walk in and she would suddenly

cut off what she was saying and put on some fake " nice " face, give a

fake laugh, and suddenly turn into Poppins. Gag. I've seen that

fakeness so many times in so many situations, just to have her turn into

a cut throat as soon as the person left the room. What an awful way to

live. And I would carry around all of her negativity, wondering why

everyone was so evil to her. Don't you just feel poisoned sometimes???

Kathy

[Guest guest]

>Don't you just feel

> poisoned sometimes???

>

Kathy, yes that's exactly it. I want to get that

poison out!

Joy

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